LAKIA
The sound of banging made me shoot up from the bed. I hadn’t realized I had dozed off. My eyes searched the room for Monfua, but he wasn’t around. I got up from the bed, hurrying out of the room. The place was empty. “Where did he go?” I mumbled.
Foe’s voice boomed from the other side of the door, “Kia!” he shouted.
I hurried to the door, swinging it open. “Why are you banging on the door like that?”
“Nigga I’ve been banging on this muhfucka for a minute,” he said as he peeked inside the crib. “Where is Ma? I saw her funky ass rental outside.”
I had forgotten to take it back to her, “Shit. I forgot to drop it back off to her. She was so damn drunk at your party, I dropped her off,” I told him.
He peeked inside again. I rolled my eyes as I opened the door wider. “Come in, he’s not here. I think he stepped out for a minute.”
He sucked his teeth as his eyes tightened. “You said the nigga was missing.”
I knew I was tired because I forgot to call him back and tell him Monfua had shown up. “He came back,” I paused.
It was time to tell my brother the truth, and a part of me wanted to leave well enough alone, but I knew that for me to move on and feel free, I needed to tell him. Foe glanced around the place before he sat on the couch. He pulled out a blunt and held it up, “Can I smoke in here?”
I crossed my arms over my chest. “No, but we can step on the balcony, come on,” I instructed him, leading the way.
Once we were outside, I let him take a few pulls of his blunt.
“I know you don’t like Harvey and at first it really bothered the fuck out of me because I love you both, but I’ve never been a nigga to force somebody to like someone.
I don’t know how it’s going to work, but she is not going anywhere,” he started.
“And Ma, I’m cutting her the fuck off completely.
I thought she would have gotten her shit together by now, but the shit she's doing is wild.”
“I don’t hate Harvey,” I blurted. “Did I think what she did was fucked, yes, but I don’t hate her.
You know, although we bump heads. We both have the same issue.
You know, with the whole Harvey and Monfua thing.
I know I can not dictate who you’re with and,” I paused.
“You can’t do that to me either. I love you, Myles, and I appreciate everything you’ve done for me, but I’m your sister, not your child,” I explained.
He handed me the blunt and I took a few pulls.
He looked out toward the quiet streets before looking back at me.
“I fuck with Monfua. I respect him. I don’t know what kind of fairy dust you got up your ass but that nigga rides for you.
Maybe I was projecting what I went through on you two.
I mean as long as the nigga treats you right.
I’m cool with it. I owe my nigga an apology. ”
I began choking on the smoke that settled in my lungs as I smiled. Foe snatched the blunt from my hand. “Give me my shit with yo green ass. It ain’t smokin’ if you ain’t chokin’,” he joked.
I cleared my throat. “I haven’t been in school in two years,” I mumbled.
He paused mid-smoke. “Fuck you just say?”
“I-I,” froze. “I got kicked out for messing with a professor. I thought I was in love, but I was—”
His head flew back. “Hold the fuck on. So, what happened to all that money I was giving you, Lakia!” he spat.
I could see the anger rising in him. “I used it to take care of us.”
“Us!” he barked, then shook his head. “No, you used it to take care of that nigga.” He laughed.
“You’re just as bad as your momma. Y’all use me, then come around and act like shit is sweet.
Every decision you’ve made since you’ve been here has been dumb as fuck.
For two fucking years I’ve been breaking you off for school and you use my shit to give to a nigga that dogged you out. Where the nigga at?” he gritted.
I felt ashamed, so ashamed I couldn’t speak, but I knew I had to. It hurt me that he compared me to our mother, and as bad as I wanted to deny it, the shit was true. He ran in my face, seething at me. “Where the fuck is he!”
“Monfua killed him!” I screamed.
He stepped back and nodded. “So, what, you married that nigga cause you were too selfish to tell me you fucked up? You used one of my niggas for that shit? Lakia, of all people, you know what the fuck I’ve been through to get that money.
A nigga walking around with no sleep, scheming, hustling, and robbing niggas for y’all.
It was me. And you do some shit like that?
It’s not even the school that’s fucking me up.
It’s you not telling me. It’s you taking advantage of me.
You couldn’t get it out of the mud on your own.
Harvey was right, sometimes you do need to love your family from a distance.
Fuck you. I wish I had known because I would have warned Monfua to fuckin’ run.
Don’t hit my jack for shit!” he finished as he slammed the patio door before leaving the house.
“Foe, I’m sorry!” I shouted as he held his middle finger up before he hopped on his bike and took off.
I cried because, although Monfua and I were in a good space, I was still at odds with my best friend, my fucking brother.