3. CHAPTER TWO
CHAPTER TWO
SASHA
I t’s been two years since I escaped hell and now my twenty-fourth birthday was coming up.
“You’re quiet,” Nick said, dragging me from my thoughts about my old life. I’ve come to enjoy talking to him over the past couple of years. I think he has a crush on me but I couldn’t see him as anything other than a friend despite his beautiful brown eyes and light blonde hair. Honestly, I haven’t been able to open my heart to anyone new. I’ve come to terms with the fact that Baris is gone, even though he still visits me in my sleep almost every night. I’ve grieved more than I realized I ever would for someone I was in love with. But he’s not next to me in reality even if sometimes it feels like he is, watching over me. I need to move on with my life but my heart won’t let me.
“Just thinking about how delicious this lasagna is.” I forked a piece of it and shoved it in my mouth, the scrumptious sweet and acidic tomato flavors mixed with the perfectly burnt cheese, burst on my tongue. Nick was kind enough to grab some food from the Italian restaurant so we could have lunch together. Sometimes we didn’t have the time to take a large break if we were busy, and today was extremely busy. So, eating at my desk was perfect.
He glanced at the birthday gift he’d given me which I proudly wore around my wrist. “I take it you like the bracelet?”
I held the chain between my fingers and looked down. “I love it. So pretty.”
“Well, I’m glad. It cost me a pretty penny but you’re worth it.” Nick smiled.
I kept my head down and continued to eat and felt my cheeks become as warm as my meal. Nick would say things like that once in a while, and as sweet as it was, it had started to make me a little uncomfortable. But since he knew I wasn’t looking for a relationship with anyone, I decided to stay quiet. He could have just been talking as a friend, right?
“You’ve settled into your new position quite well.”
“I love it.” My face lit up and I glanced at him. “I love dealing with the guests. I never got to do that before. I’m proud of my promotion.”
When I first started, I was limited to roles on board for inexperienced workers. I started off doing ad hoc duties, assisting the managers in whatever tasks they assigned to me. Most of the time it was photocopying, typing, answering correspondence, or even getting coffee for my boss. Eventually, they rewarded me for my hard work and offered me a higher position of dealing with guests. It was a promotion I never expected, but I cherished. Despite my history, I was great at dealing with people. Probably because I was starved for companionship, I was making up for lost time. I loved talking to people about their cultures, their interests, and where they’d been in the world, wanting to add those destinations to my dream list.
“The role suits you,” Nick complimented. “You’re good with people. I can tell you love it, well, except dealing with us maintenance guys.”
He wasn’t wrong. I dealt with the team for any issues that were on the ship and, even though the liner is fairly new, there are problems that need to be ironed out. Dealing with the maintenance guys, however, is an entire issue on its own, especially when Zeke Walker is involved. The man was in his late twenties or thirties, I forgot what I had seen on his paperwork, and he still seems to have some kind of a problem with me. No issues with the other team or guests on the boat. Just me. The company likes him because he’s the best fixer-upper we have. I just hate dealing with him.
Both Zeke and Nick started about the same time which was not long after me. I wasn’t interested in dating, so I focused on other things. My work, the new people I’ve met on board, my travels, and crossing off my destination list every time the liner embarks on a journey.
“You’re seriously okay with the guests whining to you every day?”
“I’m fine with it.”
Nick shook his head and raised his brows. “I don’t know how you deal with them. It’s bad enough they try and hang around when I fix their electrical issues, but the stuff they complain about. They complain about everything.”
Nick had no clue what it was like to live the sheltered life I used to. I had no friends, no one I could really confess my deepest and darkest secrets to. As nice as Reece was, and as much as I trusted him, he wasn’t that type of friend. Meeting people and making friends was an entirely new world to me. An experience I cherished with everything I had. If I had to deal with a few complaints to maintain the role I loved, then I would just deal with it.
Suddenly, my phone buzzed with a text message. It was for a new maintenance request.
“You’re up.” I smiled at Nick and gently tossed my phone on my desk. “Room 240. Bathroom light keeps flashing and their TV is on the fritz. Apparently, it was working just fine yesterday.”
“Maybe they just need a priest to cast out the ghost in there.” Nick dumped his plate in the trash. “Ohhhhh,” he said in a ghostly voice and twinkled his fingers near me. “We may have found a haunted room.”
“It’s not haunted.” I playfully tapped him on the arm. “Now stop distracting me and get going. I need to get back to work.”
Nick stood from his seat and bent down to kiss me on the cheek. “I’ll see you at dinner.”
I smiled and started working again at my desk now that break time was over. Probably about half an hour went by and I hadn’t even noticed, not until I received a text from Nick which made me laugh.
There was a ghost. It’s gone now.
Oh, really? How did you get rid of it?
She was lonely. Wanted some company.
Awww poor lady.
I told her to fuck off.
I laughed again and turned off my phone before focusing on the maintenance report for the week, but I was still distracted by thoughts of our upcoming destination: Rio De Janeiro which is the second largest city in Brazil.
I remember Mom used to sneak travel books when my father wasn’t around. She knew I wanted to see the world and giving me books was the best she could offer. I used to think it was her teasing me, but I’ve come to realize it was her way of keeping my dream alive.
God I missed her.
“Missed who?”
“Jesus, Zeke!” I flinched, not realizing he was behind me. I had no clue I’d said those words out loud. “Why do you keep trying to scare the shit out of me?”
He found it amusing and chuckled showing off his slight dimples. Now, if I didn’t hate Zeke, I would probably find him attractive. Okay, maybe hate is a strong word, but he did annoy the crap out of me despite his good looks. He was tall and towered over me at my simple five-foot-two frame. Zeke reached a height of five-feet-ten, and his facial hair was slightly darker than his medium brown hair. He’d shaved it all off once and I could hardly recognize him. He looked like an older version of Charlie Weber, but it wouldn’t surprise me if he was a psychopath like that actor’s character from How to Get Away with Murder .
I saw him at the pools once on his day off trying to manage a clean up. I was speaking to one of the guests who was furious that the facilities were closed due to rough seas. Zeke was fixing something I wasn’t really paying attention to, but what I did notice was that he was shirtless. His arms were buff, his chest was broad, and he had an eight-pack that I didn’t think was possible. I only knew because I counted all of them.
“It’s so easy to scare you,” he snickered. It was his life’s mission to royally piss me off.
I had to admit I did feel on edge even more so lately. Having grown up constantly trying to check your surroundings, it was a habit I couldn’t shake off.
“Where’s Nick?” he asked when I didn’t respond to him. “He’s the only person I can tolerate in this shit hole.”
He wasn’t wrong. Nick was the nicest guy out of the crew and I was grateful that he was my friend. I was glad other people recognized his kindness.
“Chasing ghosts,” I told him. “Dealing with an electrical issue in room 240.” My heart rate returned to an acceptable level and I let out a small sigh. “I’m sure the batteries just need replacing on the remote or something.”
Zeke made himself comfortable and sat on the chair that Nick had been in only half an hour before. “I’ve been meaning to talk to you about him.”
I tilted my head. “About Nick?”
Zeke nodded. “He’s my friend. He likes you and you’ve been giving the guy mixed signals for a while now.” Zeke leaned back on the chair and folded his arms. “He thinks he has a chance with you.”
“Well, he doesn’t,” I replied. No one had a chance. “What’s it to you anyway?”
“Nick’s my friend,” Zeke replied, then sat forward. He leaned his elbows on his thighs and stared at me with empty eyes. “I’ve seen you flirt with him. I’ve seen the way you look at him. You’re giving him mixed signals.”
My cheeks burned. “I haven’t been flirting with him.”
“Keep telling yourself that, Sasha.” Zeke’s voice was rough with anger. “Nick’s a nice guy. He doesn’t deserve to have his heart broken by a girl who has no clue what she wants. Put him out of his fucking misery.”
My thoughts drifted back to previous conversations I’d had with Nick. Maybe I wasn’t clear enough. Maybe I hadn’t been specific enough. I did tell him before that I wasn’t interested in dating. Maybe he needed another reminder.
“Fine,” I conceded. “I’ll talk to him again. And just for the record, I don’t flirt with him. We joke around and laugh. It’s not flirting.”
“You need to tell him that.” Zeke straightened up. “And it’s your smile too.”
What drug was this guy on? “What about my smile?”
“It confuses him.”
“My smile confuses him?” I blinked slowly, unsure of what he was on about. “What kind of bullshit is that?”
“There’s just something in your eyes when you smile that can really test a man’s patience and will.”
“He said this to you?”
“In so many words, yeah.”
“So, what are you saying, Zeke?”
He cleared his throat. “I’m saying his patience is wearing thin. He’s holding back from going after what he really wants.” Zeke dipped his head down. “I’m not sure, but I can imagine it’s not easy holding yourself back from telling the woman you adore that you’re in love with her.”
“Speaking from experience, are you?”
“Not really.” Zeke looked up at me. “I don’t fall in love. But Nick, on the other hand, he may be in deep. If you let him down, let him down gently.”
“And what gave you the impression that I’d be anything but kind toward Nick?”
“I know nothing about you, Sasha,” he responded then stood from the chair. “You could be a bitch for all I know. Nick is my friend and I protect my friends from people that are no good for them.”
“He’s my friend too.”
“You need to tell him that.”
Seems like this could have been the reason why he’s hated me for so long. He thought I was stringing his friend along. I didn’t appreciate the way he spoke with me. Like I was the enemy coming into fire with his entire family. That’s not the type of person I was. And I wasn’t a bitch like he so casually thought. He really knew nothing about me.
Zeke dumped some paperwork on my desk. My eyes flicked to the obvious oil stain at the corner of the yellow page, which prompted me to look at his hands. They were unwashed and filth had gathered beneath his nails, yet I wasn’t grossed out. “Aren’t you supposed to be off today?”
“Filling in for Jane,” I replied. “She’s called in sick but I think she’s just hungover from the party she went to last night.”
“Well, at least someone here’s having fun.”
I wasn’t sure if that was a dig directed at me or not, but I was leaning toward the latter. I’d been more adventurous on this cruise ship than I had been my entire life.
“I feel like I’ve seen everything here a thousand times over, you know?”
He was preaching to the wrong crowd. I loved everything I was able to do on this ship. All the facilities, the disco nights, surfing, dancing and watching the live shows. I’ve even had a go at the car racing and skydiving simulators. The real deal would make my heart jump out of my throat but, funny enough, it was always something I wanted to do.
“I love it here,” I told him. “There’s a lot of things I’m sick of, but the rides and activities aren’t one of them.” If he didn’t catch on, I was referring to him.
He cocked his brow and turned to me with an unimpressed smirk. Zeke then reached out his hand to touch my face and I flinched. His fingers smeared across the corner of my lip and he pressed down hard. “You’ve got food left over right here,” he said. “Did you have red pasta for lunch?”
“Close.” I nudged my face away. “Lasagna.”
He nodded with a tightened mouth and turned around giving me a quick glimpse of his backside. “Catch you later.”
This was the first time he had been talkative toward me. Zeke struck me as a little standoffish since we first met. He was never very approachable and I remembered him saying he wasn’t interested in making friends, so I kept my distance from him. When we spoke, he was usually snarky and liked to tease me, while I was bashful and nonchalant.
He closed the door when he left and I stood to go to the ladies room. I’d been seated for the past hour and a half and needed to stretch my legs. As soon as I came to wash my hands, I glanced at myself in the mirror.
There, just below my lip, black oil was smudged on my face replacing what Zeke had supposedly cleaned up before. Now I realized it was just an excuse to touch me with his unwashed hands.
It was clear he hated me, the filthy prick, but I wasn’t sure how I could change his mind about me, or whether or not I wanted to.