Chapter 17
CHAPTER SEVENTEEN
Aiden and I had barely spoken in almost two weeks. Okay, technically we had, through Max and Hunter. He apologized and I accepted it for the sake of the story:
“I can’t hate you anymore,” I said quietly. “We’re too far gone for that. I don’t want to go back to where we were.”
“We won’t,” Hunter replied immediately. “I promise, I won’t let you down again.”
But I’d be lying if I said his words didn’t echo in my head. If it didn’t change the way I thought about him as he carved out all my insecurities and laid them out between us. Still, I knew I’d miss him too much to stay mad for long.
It had no consequence on our real lives. I hadn’t seen him since our last class. I’d thought it would be easier this way, but the radio silence between us was so much worse than us being outwardly angry with each other. I missed his assholery.
It was quiet in my apartment; the only sound was the Christmas music playing softly on my phone. Christmas Eve was in a few days, and Alexa had gone home for break, so I had the place to myself.
I had nothing better to do than spend the holiday working ahead in our book. Aiden must’ve had the same thought because every so often, he’d text me: Chapter’s done .
It was pure agony, especially since the romance had started to pick back up between Max and Hunter. Ida had sent us an email with notes for our midterm, detailing all the things she liked, what we could improve with further revision, and some guidance for the rest of the manuscript:
I’m sensing there’s something more to the story than what you’re writing here, which is fine so long as it doesn’t interfere with the class environment. However, you two are meant to be writing a love story and although there is often conflict in a love story, Max and Hunter have to be together for at least a brief period of time before you take it away from the reader. It’ll make the lack of HEA all the more painful.
So, reluctantly, we’d made them get back together.
Even though I had technically forgiven Aiden through Maxine, I was still upset over what he had said. I don’t know if my heart could survive another break, but part of me wanted to risk it with Aiden.
And given our recent falling out, I still hadn’t asked Aiden to read my litmag piece. Once he did— if he did—and he gave me notes, I would submit it. It wasn’t due until the end of January anyway. But I knew Aiden would tell it to me straight. He would tell me if it was horrible, and I shouldn’t even bother submitting. Or he would tell me what to fix so I had a better chance of getting accepted.
As I reread through my short story for the millionth time, my phone pinged with a message from Aiden telling me the next chapter was done. I switched tabs on my laptop and began scrolling through the chapter before straightening.
As my lips pressed against hers, I felt her shudder against me. I clutched her waist, pulling her closer to me, even though close would never be close enough. I savored the taste of her, sweet and perfect. I wanted more.
One hand slid up to her jaw, pressing at the side until she opened her mouth for me. Her tongue slid against mine, and I couldn’t hold back my low groan.
The chapter had taken Aiden’s kiss scene virginity. And it was hot . He must’ve been reading those romances he bought at the Strand. He had Max on top of Hunter, running her fingers through his hair. I had to walk away from it once Hunter started whispering dirty things in Max’s ear because all I could hear was Aiden saying, “God, Rosie, you feel so good” over and over.
I expected the kiss to progress into a steamy scene, but Aiden had cut the chapter off, leaving it to me.
“No way,” I muttered, slamming my laptop closed. “He can’t do this.”
He’d put me in a position where if we wanted to include a sex scene, then I’d have to be the one to write it. There’s nothing wrong with a closed-door romance, but I preferred it when the door was taken off the hinges. He knew as much. There was no way that I was going to be forced to write a full sex scene while he got away with just a measly kiss.
I snatched my phone from my nightstand, settling against my headboard. Before I could think better of it, I called Aiden.
“Rosie?” he answered.
“You can’t end the chapter like that.”
“Why not?”
“Because I thought we agreed there would be a sex scene—”
“ You agreed.”
“—and I’m not going to write it.”
I could barely look him in the eye now. My face would be on fire every time I spoke to him knowing he’d read words I’d written like “slick” and “hardness.” The reasons sex scenes were so good in romance novels was because the characters were vulnerable, but safe with their love interest. No fucking way was I being vulnerable by myself over here.
He scoffed. “Why should I be the one to write it? You’re the one who reads them religiously.”
“I know you’re trying to insult me, but I’m not ashamed of that,” I snapped.
“Just write it, Rosalinda,” he snapped back.
“No way.” I couldn’t help the flush that took over my whole body at the idea of writing a sex scene for Aiden to read. “You were setting them up for it. You write it.”
“Wouldn’t the reader rather hear it from Max’s perspective?”
“Uh, no. Hunter’s point of view can be equally hot.”
He sighed dramatically. I could see it now. Aiden was probably sitting in a swiveling desk chair in his big office in his big expensive apartment. He was probably rubbing his temples, grimacing. He’d done that a lot during our first semester together.
“You’re not going to make me write this by myself,” I said.
There was silence on the other end for a moment.
“So, what then?” he said, his voice softening into curiosity. “You want to write it together?”
“Please. As if you’d ever agree to that,” I huffed.
A beat passed. “You’re on.”
I looked down at my phone, shocked. We’d written online together before, but a sex scene? I’d just been provoking him—I hadn’t thought he’d agree . I was mostly hoping he’d write it on his own, but I couldn’t back out now.
“Fine.” I put my phone on speaker then reopened my laptop to our document. Aiden’s icon was now in the corner. “You first.”
“No way. I wrote the last chapter. You start us off, Rosalinda.”
I curled my fingers in my hands, hesitating over the keyboard. I gathered all the courage Aiden didn’t have, closed my eyes, and began to type.
I’d wanted this longer than I ever really knew. Maybe from the moment I met him. And here he was, hands on my hips, mouth on mine. I couldn’t believe I finally had him.
“Go,” I said. It took a minute for him to start typing. As I waited, I heard the creaking of a chair, and the soft clicking of his keyboard.
“I want you on the bed,” he said, his breath ragged. His hands drifted up to the zipper at the side of my dress and tugged it down, the sound filling the room. “Now.”
His hands were shaking slightly, like he couldn’t control himself but was trying to. He slipped my dress over my head and pushed me gently on my back, his gaze darkening as it roamed over my body. As I watched, he stripped off his shirt and dress pants before settling between my thighs.
He cleared his throat. “Your turn.”
Of course I’d thought about what Hunter looked like under his button up shirts. But nothing I’d dreamt about compared to the reality. My hands flew to his back, desperate to feel his muscles work under my palms. He planted kisses up the side of my neck, until he reached behind my ear. He kissed the same spot over and over until I couldn’t take it. With a gasp, I tried to push his briefs off, but he brushed my hands aside, chuckling. “Eager?”
“Shut up,” I said, breathless, finding his mouth.
Nothing was as sweet as kissing Hunter. No one had ever kissed me with such urgency and tenderness, like they were bordering on the line of self-control. His tongue slipped against mine, his hands sliding up the side of my body. He reached behind me to unhook my bra and tossed it off.
To my surprise, Aiden interrupted. “My turn.” I’d expected him to drag his feet and to have to force him to write a few words. Not for him to be so eager to jump in. I shifted my legs underneath my laptop, feeling a little breathless with anticipation.
“I knew you’d be this perfect in real life,” he said. His eyes drifted back up to mine, studying me as they went, as if they were trying to memorize every detail about this moment. His mouth covered mine again as his hand moved down to slide his thumb across my nipple. I hissed out a breath, slightly arching my back at the sensation.
“Real life?” I asked.
“Don’t act like you haven’t been the star of every one of my fantasies,” he said with a wry smile.
“Really?” I asked, a tinge hopeful.
“Really. I’ve wanted you exactly like this for so long. Longer than you know,” he murmured against my mouth, his voice rumbling.
“I’ll go,” I said quickly, before he could start typing. I vaguely wondered if he could hear my breaths coming faster as my chest rose up and down. My eyes were glued to my screen, hanging onto Aiden’s every word, and I could only hope he felt a fraction of what I was feeling right now.
His eyes stared down at me, intense. “Do you ever think about me ?” he asked.
“All the time,” I whispered. “When I’m in the shower. When I’m lying in my bed all alone.”
“Fuck,” he bit out, pressing his mouth back to mine. He cradled my jaw in his hand, pulling me up toward him. He pulled back for a second, licking his thumb and index finger before coming back to me.
His wet fingers found my nipple, pinching, pulling, sending heat right down to my core.
“Oh fuck, Hunter, if you keep doing that—”
“My turn,” he rasped. I pressed my thighs together, trying to relieve the pressure. I wasn’t sure if I was more turned on by his words or the image of him sitting and writing, slowly losing control like I was.
“What? You’ll come for me just like I want you to?” His gaze had shifted down to my breasts, watching me writhe against his fingers. Then his mouth moved down my chest until his mouth covered my nipple, taking it between his teeth.
“My turn.” I tried to control my breathing. Part of me registered that maybe I should be embarrassed, but my mind was clouded with images of Aiden. My thighs pressed together under the laptop, wishing I could hang up the phone and close my laptop so I could be alone and get rid of this ache.
I nodded, already so close to the edge that I could taste it. I closed my eyes, letting the pleasure wash over me—
— when he yanked his hands and mouth away. He took my hand that was curled in the sheets and guided it down my stomach to the top of my panties. “Show me what you do when you think of me.”
I slid just the tips of my fingers into my panties, teasing myself, looking up at Hunter through my lashes. “Do you want to hear what I think about, too?”
He was sitting back on his heels now, rubbing his length through his briefs. His jaw clicked, then he nodded.
“My go-to fantasy,” I whispered, slipping my hand fully into my panties, feeling the slick between my legs. “Is in our office. I say something rude, and you say something just as rude back. Finally you’ve had enough of me and grab my arm.”
I gasped when my fingers reached my sensitive bud. I teased the area around it, not yet ready to give myself that pleasure.
“I want these off,” he said through gritted teeth, tugging at the fabric at my hips. I lifted my hips in time and in one quick move, I was fully bare in front of him. His eyes narrowed on my hand and he gritted, “Spread your legs.”
I eased my thighs apart as I teased myself. “You pull me out of my chair, your jaw tense and eyes blazing like they are now.” I gave in and circled my clit just once. “Fuck,” I sighed.
His hand slipped into his briefs, and he shuddered at the first stroke.
“You say, ‘I’m tired of that mouth of yours.’ I pout, and you aren’t able to take your gaze away from my mouth. Then I lick my lips and you inhale sharply. I lean in closely and say, ‘This mouth can do other things besides talk.’ Your eyes don’t widen—you aren’t even surprised. They just darken, completely focusing on my lips. Then you say, ‘Well, get to work.’ ”
I slipped one finger in and closed my eyes, crying out. It felt so different with someone watching you, wanting you. I rocked slowly against my hand, keeping a taunting pace, the heel of my palm firmly pressed against my clit. All of the pent-up aggression and lust for Hunter only made me want him more. I battled between opening my eyes to confirm he was still there and keeping them screwed shut from pleasure.
“You’re so fucking hot, Maxine. Some days I can’t take it.”
“Always with the Maxine, even now.” My eyes flashed open this time, watching his hand massage his length. I curled my finger, and closed my eyes, whimpering.
“I know your little fantasy’s not done,” he urged.
“I sink to my knees. Your eyes don’t leave mine as I slowly undo your belt and pull down your zipper. I pull you out and run my mouth over you—” I gasped, not being able to bite the last words out. I slipped another finger in, speeding up. “I’m close.”
He pulled my hands from me. “When you come, it’s going to be all over my cock, not on your fingers.”
Hunter took the fingers I just had inside me and lifted them to see them in the dim lamp light. He watched as they glistened, rotating my wrist. Slowly, he took them in his mouth and swirled his tongue around them, tasting me. His eyes never left mine. “Exactly how I imagined, baby.”
“Fuck me,” I breathed. I was desperate to come now that I had gotten close twice. I reached forward and pulled his briefs down. His hard cock laid against his stomach, and I couldn’t help it.
I leaned forward, swirling my tongue around the tip. He hissed. When I took more of him in my mouth, his fingers curled in my hair.
“You feel so good, Max. So good.”
My fingers froze over the board. Those words had been on a loop in my mind ever since I left Aiden’s place.
That had to be on purpose, right? I would be lying if I said I wasn’t imagining Aiden as Hunter. But was he imagining me as Max? His end of the call was as silent as mine. I only heard occasional typing, so he must’ve heard my hesitation. Quickly, I began again.
I looked up at him through my lashes, reaching the base of him.
“Yeah, just like that,” he said. Carefully, he moved my head up and down. When I nodded and he felt no resistance, he moved faster, harder, harsher.
He groaned and hissed as if I was hurting him, but I knew from the look in his eyes he was in total bliss. Aiden’s eyes were burning with—
Oh fuck. FUCK. I immediately erased his name and replaced it with Hunter’s. Fuck fuck fuck. My cheeks flamed as I thought of a million ways to move out of the country with no notice.
“Sorry,” I rushed. I smacked my palm against my head, mortified, my eyes squeezed shut. “I didn’t—”
“It’s okay,” he said, his voice thick. “Keep going.”
I took a deep breath, wishing I could just disappear off the face of the Earth. But I wasn’t done with this scene, and I craved more of his words.
His eyes were burning as he watched me. I couldn’t tear my eyes away from him as I moved my tongue around his head. When I moaned just a little, his hips thrust forward. But suddenly, he grabbed my shoulders, pulling me up.
“I don’t want to come in your mouth,” he said. “I want to come in that pretty little pussy of yours.”
He pushed me back onto the bed, his mouth seeking out mine, urgent. He settled between my legs, his hands gripping my hips, rubbing himself against me.
Eventually, he leaned back on his knees, admiring the heat between my legs. My thighs were slick with arousal.
“I have an IUD. I got tested a few months ago and haven’t been with anyone since …” I whispered.
“Me, too. Whatever you want, Max, I can grab a condom—”
“No,” I said immediately. “I want to feel you.”
Once, twice, three times he slapped his cock against my clit. “Are you sure you’re okay with this?” he asked.
I pulled him back down toward me, answering with a kiss. His lips moved slowly against mine, changing the pace completely. “I’ve wanted you for so long.”
“I’ve wanted you the whole time,” he said against my lips.
I leaned back to look him directly in the eye. “Really?”
“The minute you walked in with your sweet southern smile. I was a goner when that smile was aimed at me.”
“Do you really mean that?”
I was asking as Rosie now. Surely he was caught up in the scene, and I was just reading into it. But Maxine wasn’t from the south. Both of them had been born and raised in California; it was a strategic plot point for us.
“The whole time,” he promised, leaning down for a kiss.
I gasped when he finally, finally entered me. I stretched slowly around him, feeling just a hint of pain at his size. Desperate whimpers escaped me the more he moved.
“Hunter,” I gasped, my head falling back onto his pillow.
He paused for a moment, letting me adjust. “Can you take more?”
I nodded, desperate for him to keep moving. Slowly, he pushed further inside me and when his hips settled against mine, I cried out in relief, biting my lip. I reached for his shoulders, my hands running up the landscape of his body until they settled around his neck.
He smiled down at me. His hand caressed my cheek, holding my head so gently.
I turned my face into his palm, kissing it.
“Hi.”
“Hi.” I smiled. Slowly, he began to move his hips. I gasped, clutching at his shoulders. He started slowly, but eventually we built to something so much greater. “More,” I begged.
“You’re doing so good, baby,” he said, still holding my cheek with one hand, his other falling down to rub my clit in circles.
“Please.”
Both Aiden and I were breathing heavily now. Our fingers were moving rapidly across our keyboards. Heat was rising to my cheeks. It was a mix of sexy and pure mortification writing this with Aiden.
“I’ll give you anything you want,” he said, groaning. “Anything you want. You want me to smile? I’ll never stop. You want me to go harder, faster? I’ll exhaust myself. Just for you.” His hips moved faster, and I writhed underneath him, gripping him hard. My hips bucked up to meet his, seeking more and more from him.
I pulled him closer to me. I needed all of him, every part of him touching me. His face fell into my neck, kissing behind my ear.
I felt his breath hot on my skin. “Are you close?”
“Uh-huh.” I nodded, my eyes squeezing shut.
“Look at you, writhing on my cock. Fuck,” he bit out, moving faster. “You’re so fucking tight.”
My head fell back onto the pillow, my hips twisting. “Oh God, Hunter. I can’t take it.”
“You’re taking it right now. Every inch of my cock, baby,” he repeated. I squeezed down on him, and he drove his hips forward, groaning. “You’re so fucking sexy, Max. I’m losing my mind over here trying not to come.”
“Fuck,” I whimpered. “Hunter, I’m gonna—”
“Come for me.” He rose up and watched me as we moved together. “Come on baby, come. Come for me.”
Pleasure wracked my body, my legs shaking. Hunter’s movements quickened, the strength of them nearly pushing me further up the bed. With a jerk of his hips, he groaned as he spilled into me.
He collapsed on top of me, pushing my sweaty hair away from my forehead. I could tell it was on the tip of his tongue. Everything we meant to each other, ready to burst from him.
He wasn’t ready to say it, though, and I wasn’t ready to hear it. But I knew I wanted this—and so much more—with him.
I wanted Sunday brunches.
Lazy Saturdays.
Writing together in a living room.
Shopping at bookstores and kissing in between the stacks.
But I didn’t know how to say it. So, I reached up and pressed a soft kiss against his mouth, wishing he could tell all that I meant by it.