Chapter 9
I keep my distance from Teddy during dinner in the casual dining room. It’s not because the sight of him scoffing pizza slathered in pineapple with the rest of the guys turns my stomach. It’s a crime for sure, but not one I’d see him banished for.
The reason I’m perched strategically between Haley and Sam at the far end of the rustic farmhouse table is so they get a front-row seat for my Oscar-winning performance.
Haley’s stare while we stood outside inspecting the lighting displays made me shuffle inside my bulky jacket.
It tells me I need to up my game of feigned disinterest in Teddy whenever she’s around.
I shouldn’t have let him hold my hand, but it was fucking cold out there once the sun went down, and his warm fingers gently squeezing mine drove the chill away while sending pulsing reminders of his kiss minutes before.
The memory of his lips on mine sends tendrils of heat curling through my body even now.
And I’d definitely like to feel those hands on other parts of me, but it’s hands off when we’re in company.
“So…” Haley tears off three corners of pizza and feeds them to the dogs lying watchfully at her feet. They take them with dainty teeth and inhale. I wait. I know only too well what Haley’s ‘So’ means. She wants to ask a question but hates to pry, so she always masks it as a statement.
“You and Teddy seem to be working well together.” Her eyebrow arches in a way that suggests she’s fishing for more than updates on the challenges.
“Yeah. Teddy and I get on fine. Mainly because he does what I bloody well tell him to.”
Sam lets out a huff and leans across me. “Maybe he could teach Ollie a thing or two. I know he’s your brother, Haley, but god, that man could frustrate a saint.”
Haley waves Sam off without breaking eye contact with me. She’s wearing the same expression she used to get whenever I’d insist Pierre and I were “totally fine”. She could see straight through my bullshit.
“So, what exactly have you been telling Teddy to do?”
That knowing little smirk gives her game away: she’s trying to lure me into a girly tell-all session. Hoping I’ll spill all over pizza and wine. No chance of that happening. I chew my mouthful of pizza with deliberate slowness, buying myself time to think.
The truth is, I’ve built walls around my feelings lately—thick ones.
I’m not ready to let my friends peek behind them when I’m still figuring things out myself.
Because yes, I’m attracted to Teddy—and hell, who wouldn’t be with those luscious copper-penny locks and soulful brown eyes—but also, I actually really like him.
Because of that, he’s the perfect antidote to the shit-show my life has been this last couple of months.
Sure, I could have gone back to my old stomping grounds and my old pre-Pierre habits.
Hit the clubs, find someone attractive and anonymous, fuck the hurt right out of my system.
But something’s shifted in me. I want to lose myself in the physical release of some great sex, but the thought of hooking up with a stranger leaves me cold.
Maybe Pierre broke something in me, or maybe he fixed something. Either way, if I’m going to lose myself in a guy, I want it to matter at least a little bit. I want to know more than just his name. I want to know outside of the bedroom he’s not some total arsehole. I want to like him.
Teddy checks every box. He’s not hustling me into bed as his reputation suggested he might, but the chemistry between us is undeniable, the outcome inevitable.
I can already see Haley’s mouth pinch and hear Sam’s ‘are you sure?’ voice.
They’re on full alert for anything or anyone who might hurt me, but I don’t need them to stage an intervention.
I’m sealing this in a compartment: fling, finite, feelings not included.
If I keep the lid on, my heart stays safe.
“Well, he’s the one who went up the ladder this afternoon.” I take another bite, keeping my tone light. “And when Solly picked up a stone in his hoof this morning, Teddy dug it out without being asked.”
The memory makes me smile despite myself. Pierre would have wrinkled his nose and looked around for someone else to handle anything involving smelly horses’ hooves. Teddy just pulled out this little multi-tool and went to work like it was nothing.
“Plus, he’s fetching drinks right now, so…”
Like magic, Teddy appears with a bottle of red wine, that easy smile already in place. Something about the way his eyes find mine first makes my stomach flip.
“Refill?” He’s already reaching for my glass.
When he leans over to pour, his hand settles on my shoulder.
It’s so casual, natural, like he’s done it a hundred times.
The warmth of his palm seeps through my shirt.
I’d love nothing more than for him to let it rove beneath the collar.
Damn if he doesn’t smell so good, too. Vanilla and spice that makes me want to lean closer instead of away.
I almost sigh with pleasure, and my nipples pebble. If I don’t get some space between us, my friends are going to notice exactly how much I’m enjoying this.
“Sam and Haley probably want some, too.” The words come out a little too quickly.
He glances at their glasses and nods. “Right, I’ll grab another bottle.”
As he heads for the kitchen, the penny drops. I’ve just proved how fast he jumps when I ask—and sent away the only buffer to their interrogation. Haley and Sam pin me with identical looks.
“See? Told you he does whatever I ask.” I aim for smug, but Sam’s raised eyebrow says I’m not fooling anyone.
Before I have to field their questions, I’m saved by an interruption. Tommy Bunt is on his feet, banging a knife on a glass for quiet.
“Right, ladies and gents,” he says, beaming ear to ear. “Time to throw on yer coats and hats and follow me and Loreena outside, yeah? We’re going to make the big announcement. The lighting challenge winner. See yer in five.”
Christian sculls his half-glass of beer.
Ollie stuffs almost a whole piece of pizza into his mouth.
The rest of us abandon our food, and with a scrape of chairs on the wooden floor, pour out of the dining room, and head to our rooms to grab outdoor clothing.
Ahead of me, Garrett and Liv stroll hand in hand along the hallway with a relaxed confidence.
I bustle past them, not caring I look like an overexcited child as I run upstairs to my room.
From the thunder of footsteps echoing from other passageways, I’m sure I’m not the only one keen to hear the results.
I arrive back in the main foyer just in time to meet Teddy, bundled up in an oversized coat and only a few wisps of red curls visible underneath a black beanie.
“We’ve got this,” he says, pulling me into a side hug. “We’re going to win.”
“Sounds like my competitiveness is catching.” I yank the beanie down, and he swipes it back up to reveal brown eyes lit with amusement.
We gather under the wide portico. The other couples mutter, voices low. The lively banter ricocheting around the dining room only minutes ago is now subdued.
The cascading fountain behind us drowns out the few murmurs of conversation. The waves of rushing cold water send a shiver rippling through me.
“Cold?” Teddy asks, automatically drawing me into him. I nestle against his comfortable chest, his arm wrapping around my collarbone.
“A little,” I lie, snuggling into him. No one will notice. All eyes are on Loreena and Tommy, who stand at the top of the steps once again.
“We thought the gingerbread challenge was a tough one to judge.” Loreena gives a raspy chuckle.
You’d swear the woman has a packet a day habit, but the smokiness in her voice is all natural. She’s a beautiful woman, and also softer and kinder than her reality-telly-queen reputation suggests. I know she’s giving us all a fair go in this competition, but god I hope she liked ours best.
“But you’ve really pushed us today. These are incredible.” She spreads her arms wide.
The arch of the lighted door behind her and the lit-up windows on either side frame Loreena like an angel in a Christmas tableau.
Rainbows of light ripple across her blonde hair, which hangs long and loose.
No hat-hair here, simply gleaming golden strands illuminated by our competitors’ work.
My stomach plummets. We’ve lost. I see it in Loreena’s beaming smile and in the radiant faces of the others, washed with colour.
“But then there’s that.” She points to her left, and we all turn our gazes in that direction.
I thought our star creation looked amazing before, but now, with the sky dark and moonless, it really is spectacular. The peaked gable of the stable block glows with an unearthly light.
We constructed the central star from a tightly woven web of lights.
It’s far from our first sorry attempt, thanks to Geordie’s guidance.
After talking to him, Teddy and I sat on the cobbles for half an hour, ignoring the cold seeping up even through a couple of old horse blankets we borrowed from the stable, just to make the lattice structure to support my grand design.
The strength of the wood lashed together with a zillion cable ties meant we could load it up with lights.
Now, the star blazes so bright you’d swear it had fallen from the sky.
It really could be the work of some divine hand, a beacon placed to beckon shepherds and kings to worship the birth of a saviour.
However, the pièce de résistance has to be the star’s sweeping tail. The pulsing lights trailing behind it create the illusion of movement. It’s so beautiful, it even takes my breath away.
“You did good.” Teddy hugs me closer and whispers against my ear.
“No, we did good,” I whisper back, tightening my arm around his waist.