Chapter 29
Chapter Twenty-Nine
S kye
Kingston is very quiet when we leave the literacy center and I'm nervous that he didn't enjoy himself. "Hey, how did it go?" I ask as we step out into the street. He stares at me for a couple of seconds, his eyes hovering over my lips before moving back to my eyes.
"It was a really great experience," he says. "Thank you for inviting me."
"Oh, I'm so glad that you enjoyed it. Did you have fun with Bobby?"
"He's a great reader and he has lived a full life," he says. "I was glad to meet him and talk to him. How was your time with Arthur?"
"Great," I say, nodding slowly. "He is amazing. He grew up in South Carolina back in the days of Jim Crow and he went to an all-black school, but then he had to drop out to help his family. Well, he just tells me so much about what it was like in the South in those days, and I feel like I get a history lesson every time. But it's amazing because it's real life. I'm just glad that there are people here who want to tell their stories, are happy to tell their stories. Honestly, one of the reasons he wants to become fully literate is because he wants to write a book." I grin at him. "How cool is that?"
"That sounds pretty amazing," he says, nodding. "You're a pretty special person, aren't you, Skye?"
I blush slightly at his intense gaze. "You're only just realizing that?" I say teasingly, wanting to make the mood a little lighter. "Now, are you ready for lunch?"
"I am more than ready," he says. "I need to feast."
"On me or on food?" I ask.
He growls as he grabs my hand and pulls me toward him. "What if I say both?" He presses his lips down into mine and I feel his fingers in my hair.
I shiver slightly as I kiss him back and reach up and rub the hair at the nape of his neck. He growls some more against my lips and pulls back slightly to stare into my eyes.
"So, what's for lunch?
"Well, there's this cute little sandwich store that's close to here and I thought we could get some subs and take them to Central Park and have a picnic in the park." He raises a single eyebrow. "What, is that too cliché?"
"No, it sounds great. But I do ask one thing."
"Sure. What is it?"
"Can we get a Frisbee?"
"A Frisbee?"
"Yeah. I've always wanted to play Frisbee in the park. Every time I jog through or go there, I see people playing Frisbee and I've never done it."
"We can get a Frisbee," I nod. "Maybe at a bodega or something."
"Sounds good."
We walk toward the sandwich shop and there's a feeling of contentment in my stomach. This is starting to feel like a real date. This is starting to feel like a real relationship, and that makes me a bit uneasy. I look over at Kingston and he's smiling as he walks. He has a content look on his face that I don't normally see in the office. In the office, he's usually serious and full of pent up energy.
"What are you thinking?” he asks when he catches me looking at him.
"I'm thinking that when you're outside of the office you see him so much lighter. When you're in the office, you seem so full of heaviness."
"I think that's because when I'm in the office I'm focused on work, and the cases and the money and…" He shrugs. "Nothing else in life enters my mindset at that time. But when I'm outside of the office…" He pauses and gives me a small smile. "When I'm outside of the office with you , I don't even think about work."
"Does that make you mad at me?" I ask. "Are you resentful of the fact that your mind isn't on work 24/7?"
"The opposite," he says. "I like thinking about kissing you and touching you and learning more about you and just being with you."
"And are you going to say being inside of me?" I giggle.
He shakes his head. "You know what I've noticed about you, Skye?"
"No. What's that?"
"When you're uncomfortable or when you think situations are becoming too serious, you try to make a joke or you're self-deprecating, or maybe you try to start an argument with me."
"I don't do that," I say quickly.
He nods slowly. "You do. I get it, it’s some form of self-preservation, but you don't have to self-preserve against me."
"I'm not. I'm just being me and we're just having fun, right? This is just our fun dates, fun nights, fun…I think we can both admit that this is a little bit more than just a fun date or fun night or whatever.”
"Well, it's only the second weekend that we've done it, so I think we're in trouble, don't you?" His voice is soft and his eyes look everywhere but at me.
“Define, I think we're in trouble?” I try not to bite my lip. I will not flirt. I will not ask him if he thinks about me when I’m not with him, like I do with him. I will not pull him into my arms and kiss him.
I will not act desperate, like I need him to fall in love with me and make me his forever. Though, I wouldn’t exactly cry if he told me he wanted to spend eternity with me.
I’m such a loser.
"I think if we're both enjoying these days, hanging out together, even more than the sex, then it means we enjoy being with each other."
"Not that there’s anything wrong with that," I say quickly.
"No, there's nothing wrong with that."
"But then it might complicate the guidelines we set up for this situationship, right? Where we're not supposed to catch feelings, and we're not supposed to see each other as more than a booty call or friends with benefits. I mean, you're my boss with benefits, and my friend with benefits, because I do consider us friends now, but it's nothing more than that," I say quickly.
"Isn't it?"
I stare at him for a couple of seconds before we reach the sandwich shop. "We're here, look. Let's get some subs."
"I recommend the meatball sub, but we're going to continue this conversation later," he says softly.
"Oh? What, at Tiffany's when you get me a diamond ring?" He smiles and doesn't say anything and I can feel my heart racing as we walk into the sandwich shop. I don't know what's going on or why I'm feeling like this or why he's talking like this, but suddenly I feel nervous. Suddenly I feel like we went from zero to 100 and I don't even remember pressing down on the gas. Suddenly my heart is racing and my skin is burning, and as I stare at his face, I know that I love him.
He's handsome and he's funny and he's caring and he's smart and he's the best sex I've ever had in my life, even though I know it can't be anything, that he doesn't want anything. Hell, I don't want anything. He'd just be a complication in my life. Even though I know all of this, I still want him to be my favorite mistake. I still want him to be the one that makes my heart pang because there's just something about Kingston Chase that I know I will never forget.
"What do you want?" he asks as we stand at the counter.
"A meatball sub with extra meatballs and provolone," I grin. "And some salt and vinegar chips."
"We'll get two of those," he says to the lady behind the counter as he pulls out his credit card.
"No, what are you doing?" I say quickly. "I planned the date. I?—"
"You're not paying for this,” he says. "I am."
"But..."
"But nothing," he says. "When I take a woman on a date, when I'm wooing her, I want to show her through words and actions and, sue me, money that I can take care of her."
"But we already said this isn't a date, we?—"
"It's a date, Sky," he says softly. "We can call it something else, but let's be real here: this is a date."
"But what if I start catching feelings for you and thinking that we're going to end up like Max and Lila?"
"We'll take it one day at a time and see where it goes," he says. "I'm not scared of feelings," he says, but I can tell from his tone and the way his body stills slightly that he is scared. He's as scared as me. Maybe he does feel something for me? Maybe he…
His phone rings then and he glances down at the screen.
"It's Remington." He frowns. "I'm not sure why he's calling me because I'm pretty sure he had a hot date this morning."
"But you want to answer?"
"I'll take it when we walk to the park, if you don't mind."
"Oh, no. You can take it now."
"If you let me pay for the food, I'll take it." He squeezes my hand. "I really want to focus on..."
"Focus on what?" I ask softly.
"Nothing," he says quickly.
He takes a deep breath and runs his fingers through his dark hair, and he looks at me as if he's as confused by his own emotions as I am.
"This is a cluster, isn't it?" he says, chuckling slightly and shaking his head.
“Depends on if you think a cluster is something good or bad?"
"I don't even know," he says. "But I feel like I'm in a maze and I don't know the way back out again."
"I know what you mean," I admit. "So what do we do?"
"We do what we set out to do," he says.
"And what's that?" I ask him.
"We try and find the right path."
"But..."
"But nothing. We walked into the maze thinking we were on one path, but maybe we need to go on another one to find our way out."
I blink at him. "You're confusing me."
"Trust me," he laughs. "I'm confusing myself."
He pays for the sandwiches and I grab the bag and we head out. He frowns as he sees that Remington's calling him again.
"Sorry, I'm going to answer this. He doesn't normally call me this many times."
"It's okay," I say, and watch as he barks into the phone.
"Hey, Remington. What's up?"
I stare at his throat and his muscular arms and I swallow hard as we stand to the side.
"You what?" He looks shocked. "Are you sure? No?" He takes a deep sigh. "Wow. How are you feeling?"
I wonder what's going on. I cannot tell from the only side of the conversation I can hear. I hope it's nothing bad. I hope no one's died. I hope it's not about the firm. I swallow hard as I watch Kingston talking into the phone. His eyes turn to mine and they're wide and shocked.
"So are you going to take a test? I know that might be hurtful, but you need to know. Yeah. Yep." He nods as he continues speaking to Remi. Then he's silent for a couple of minutes, just nodding his head. "I understand. Of course. I could make a joke right now, but I don't think it's the time or the place, but just know I'm here for you. Okay? Call me later if you need to. Sure." He hangs up.
I stare at him for a couple of seconds and he just shakes his head as he puts his phone back into his back pocket. "What's going on?" I ask, hoping that he'll tell me. "I mean, you don't have to tell me what's going on if it's like, a matter of privacy or..."
"Remington just found out he's a father." He makes a face and wrinkles his nose.
"What?" My eyes widen. "What are you talking about?"
"I guess he has a seven-year-old little girl." Kingston shrugs. "He's going to get a paternity test to make sure, but he's pretty confident that the girl is his."
"What? But I thought he was never married?"
Kingston chuckles lightly, "He's never been married. It sounds like it's a product of a one-night stand and she never told him."
"Oh, whoa," I say, staring. "That's crazy."
"It is. I feel bad for him in a way."
"Because he has a kid?"
"No, because he has a kid and he didn't know about it for seven years." His expression changes and he grabs my hands. "Hey, if you were to get pregnant, you would tell me, right?"
"I'm not going to get pregnant, I'm on birth control and?—"
"Let's just say you did. You'd tell me, right?"
I nod slowly. "I'd tell you. I mean, I wouldn't want you to think I was after your money or something."
"But I would never think that of you, Skye. I promise."
"Okay. So shall we go to the park and…"
He shakes his head, "Do you mind if we go back to my place?
"Oh?" I ask him.
"I kind of just want to be with you right now."
He licks his lips and I frown slightly, "But you are with me?"
He leans forward and kisses the side of my neck. I feel his hand running down the side of my body and I melt against him.
"I want to fuck you," he whispers in my ear. "I know that this is not just about us fucking, but from the first moment I saw you this morning, I wanted you in my bed. I wanted to be inside of you. I wanted you naked. I want to fuck you right here and right now, and I don't want to get arrested for fucking you in the park. Because believe you me, that's what would be happening."
I stare at him for a couple of seconds with a small smile and giggle. "So tell me how you really feel," I say, and he frowns slightly.
"You're not mad at me, are you?"
"No," I say as I slip my fingers down the front of his jeans and squeeze. He groans and I can feel his hardness twitch slightly. I laugh as I move my hand.
"You're going to fucking tease me right here and right now. There's an alleyway right over there," he says. "I can have you there in ten seconds, bend you over, lift up that dress, slip your panties on the side and slide into you so hard and fast that no one would even know we were fucking by the time we were done."
"So what? You're saying you're a two-minute man?"
"If I have to be." He grins and licks his lips. "I mean, if you’d rather we go to the park first and play Frisbee and eat these sandwiches, that's fine, because I want to respect you. But I'm not going to lie. I want that dress off of you and I want you in my bed and I want you riding me so hard and so fast that I don't know which way is up and which way is down."
"Okay," I say softly. "Let's do it. Let's go home and fuck."