Chapter 5
CHAPTER FIVE
Jenna
I’m a quarter of the way through my second drink, and a warm relaxed feeling is flowing through me. Even though I come here once a week, I usually nurse one drink for a while and then switch to water, so I’m really a lightweight. Or maybe the warmth is from more than just the drinks …
But at his question, I freeze, staring down into my drink.
“That … well, I’d say it’s a long story, but it’s not really that long in the telling.
” I glance his way again. “It’s not a nice story, though.
At least, I didn’t enjoy it. You sure you wanna know?
” I wave a hand between us. “It’s not exactly a great get-to-know-you conversation in the way I assume you intended. ”
He studies me for a second, his face somber, his dark eyes serious but not cold. “I’m happy to listen if you want to talk about it. You don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to, though. I could find another innocuous get-to-know-you question, if you prefer.”
Letting out a soft chuckle, I shake my head.
“It’s fine. It just still stings, you know?
I went to college at Oregon State and stayed in the area, moving closer to Salem after I graduated.
” I lean in close and lower my voice like I’m telling him a secret.
“I know you’ve decided I’m a city girl because of that, but I grew up in a little town on the coast—Stratford Bay.
It’s bigger than Arcadian Falls, but not by a whole lot.
Tourism is a major industry there, too. So I get how small towns work.
” Or at least I thought I did before I moved here.
I guess growing up in one isn’t quite the same as being intimately involved in the business and politics of how a place runs as an adult. Or so I’m discovering.
Taking a sip of my drink, I turn to face him.
“Anyway, I got my degree in business, and I ended up planning a lot of events for my sorority and a couple other smaller clubs I was in. I was good at it and enjoyed the work, and I got a job at a wedding and events venue pretty soon after graduation. I started off working part time, but after a year, I was offered a full-time job.”
“That sounds pretty good so far,” Aaron murmurs. “Where’d it go off the rails? Did you order the wrong cake for a bridezilla and get fired?”
I let out a soft chuckle. “No. Even with the worst bridezillas who changed their minds three thousand times right up to the last minute, I managed to make them happy with whatever ended up at their big day.” I lean in close again. “Not to brag, but I’m really good at my job.”
“Right.” He winks. “No bragging.”
Grinning, I shake my head. “Anyway. I started dating a guy my senior year. We were in love. He was a year younger than me, but that didn’t matter. We moved in together after I graduated.”
He grunts. “I think I see where things are going to go wrong.”
“Probably.” I hold up a finger. “But it’s not nearly as dramatic as I’m sure you’re imagining.
There was no cheating. No giant blowup. It’s so much more insipid than that.
Like I said, he was a year behind me, majoring in English.
” Aaron’s eyebrows jump. “I thought he was so deep, reciting poetry and discussing the symbolism of great works of literature. I always enjoyed reading, but not the way they dissect things in English classes, you know? But we’d talk books and movies, and he’d take me to plays and movie festivals—I actually helped plan an on-campus student film festival.
It was a lot of fun. Anyway, he seemed so deep and interesting and amazing, right? ”
Aaron dips his chin in one of his signature nods, his gaze intent as he listens to me.
It’s weird that he’s so interested. This story just seems boring to me.
Even though it felt awful, it wasn’t like anyone cheated or we had a big, dramatic breakup.
Maybe that’s why it hurts more than I feel like it should.
The way he ended things seemed as casual as deciding to change brands of paper towels.
“Right. After he graduated, he applied to the Master’s program. I figured he maybe wanted to become a professor or something, you know? He was really passionate about literature and film, and I fully supported his goals.”
“And by fully supported, you mean …”
“Fully supported. He helped out with groceries and when we went out, but I covered pretty much everything else.”
“Let me guess, you did most of the chores, too?”
I laugh, though it’s not that funny. “How’d you guess? He was just so busy with school—all the reading and all the papers—he couldn’t be expected to remember to rinse his plates and load the dishwasher when his big brain was crowded with such transcendent ideas, could he?”
“Course not,” Aaron adds.
“Exactly. But he loved me, and I loved him, at least that’s what I thought. I put up with it, trying my best to gently cajole him into helping out as much as he could with all his important and difficult work.”
“While you were just planning silly weddings, right?”
Another laugh leaps out of me, surprised by the way he skewers Ian’s points so easily.
“Basically. After he finished his Master’s, I wasn’t really sure where or how things were going to go.
I knew enough about academia to know that if you’re wanting to be a professor, you move where the jobs are.
Even in an area with multiple universities and community colleges not too far away, odds were that he’d need to move for work eventually.
Plus, he’d have to get his PhD somewhere else.
Oregon State doesn’t offer one in English. ”
Aaron nods again. “Makes sense.”
“So I was prepared to move, you know? We were in this together, after all. I wasn’t surprised when he applied to PhD programs all over the country.
I expected that. What I didn’t expect was that when he got an offer from one of his top choices—in Michigan—he started planning on moving with one of his friends who was also going to be going there. ”
Aaron blinks at me, sitting up and holding up a hand. “Wait. Hold on. Are you telling me he was planning to move without you?”
“Yup.” I pop the P for emphasis, take a drink, and set it down, blinking down into the garnet colored liquid.
If everyone weren’t quite so married to the typical red, green, and gold for ChristmasFest decorations, this would actually be a really beautiful color.
But even trying to deepen the red to a maroon was met with horror and swift backlash from everyone when I floated the idea a few months ago. So bright red it is for all eternity.
And even that isn’t always good enough. When I did order new ribbons and bows in the shade of bright red everyone agreed to, and they came in a shade or two darker than what we used to have, people lost their minds.
And here I’d thought that since I was in charge of planning the event that I wouldn’t have to put up with so many opinions from other people like I always did with weddings.
“Did he even ask you to go with him?”
I shake my head, still staring at my drink.
“No.” I sigh. “When I came home one night and he and his friend Dan were looking at apartment listings together, it became clear that I was not being asked to come to Michigan too. Which was extra painful since I’d already started applying to jobs over there and looking into what it would take to start my own wedding planning business. ”
“Ouch.”
I nod and say, “Yup,” again. “See what I mean, though? No real drama. No cheating.”
“You sure about that?” Aaron asks, one eyebrow arched high. “This Dan guy …”
Laughing, I nod. “I’m sure. Well …” I cock my head to one side.
Could Ian have been bi and just never told me?
I guess it’s not impossible. “It doesn’t really matter, though, does it?
The fact is, Ian basically used me to get through his Master’s degree.
I guess I should be grateful he didn’t decide to keep it going through his PhD. ”
“Whoa, whoa, whoa. Time out.” Aaron makes a T with his hands. “Nope. That’s not how this is going. You’re not going to be grateful that some asshat wasted your time and money because he didn’t waste more.”
Another sad laugh bubbles out of me. “Okay. I won’t.”
“Good.”
“I broke up with him pretty quick after that and moved in with my friend Amanda Wall for a little while. She grew up here, and her parents still live in town. She’s the one who told me about this job.
Even though I could’ve found my own apartment in Salem and kept working at my old job, I wanted to make a change and this seemed like a good opportunity.
” I spread my hands in front of me. “So here I am.”
Aaron’s silent for a moment, sipping his beer and staring off into the distance for a second like he’s processing everything I just told him before meeting my eyes again.
“I know I haven’t exactly made your job easier for you since you started and that you’d prefer someone be your yes-man.
That said, and for what it’s worth, I’m glad you’re here. ”
That makes me chuckle. “That’s a lot of pre-qualifying that statement.”
He turns a hand over on the bar top. “Just acknowledging why you might not take the statement at face value. I am, though. You are good at your job. I can tell. I might not like a lot of changes and think you need to slow down—not because your ideas are bad but because you gotta ease people in and let them get used to you before you start making big changes. But Cynthia’s been doing this for a long time, and she deserves a chance to relax and spend time with her grandkids while they’re little.
I know my mom loves getting to see Colin as often as she does. ”
“Oh, that’s right. You have a son.” I glance around the bar as though a child might pop up out of nowhere. “Is he with your mom right now?”
He shakes his head. “No. He’s with his mom.”
My eyes immediately cut to his left hand, but it’s not very visible. I don’t think he wears a wedding ring … “Your wife?” I venture, just to be safe. Here I am drinking with this man, swapping stories, and he could have a wife and kid at home waiting for him?
He nearly chokes on his beer, shaking his head and accepting the extra napkins Amy plops down in front of him.
“You know,” she says, “there was a time where we had a pool going on whether or not you and Amelia would tie the knot. You act like it’s the most ridiculous suggestion, but you and I both know you would’ve married her when she got pregnant if she’d even hinted that she wanted that. ”
My eyebrows climb my forehead the longer Amy goes on.
Sparing a glance for Aaron, who’s wiping his face and shirt with the napkins Amy gave him, I plop my chin on my hand and look at Amy.
“This sounds juicy. Fill me in on the gossip.” Glancing at Aaron.
“How old’s your son? Just so I know how ancient this history is. ”
“Five,” he rasps, then clears his throat. “He’ll be six in February. I wouldn’t call it ancient history, but it’s definitely old news.”
My lips curve in an irrepressible smile. “You know my tragic backstory, such as it is. I think it’s only fair that you tell me yours.”
He shakes his head. “Mine’s not much more interesting than yours.
Colin’s mom and I had a casual relationship.
She’s a flight attendant and travels a lot.
We’d hang out when she was in town on her days off.
The condom broke once, and that was all it took.
Nine months later, Colin was born. She’s still a flight attendant, so Colin lives with me for the most part, and he stays with her a few nights a month.
They get dinner together when she can fit it in, which is usually once a week. ”
My mouth hangs open at his oh-so-casual description of what must’ve been life changing and earth shattering. “And you and his mom are …?”
“Co-parents,” he fills in. “Friendly, of course, but our previous relationship, such as it was, ended when she got pregnant. She didn’t want to be more than we were, and I was busy dealing with my father’s passing and fully taking over running the tree farm at that point.
I didn’t really have the bandwidth for much more either. ”
“Wow,” I say, and I know it sounds like I’m being judgy, but I can’t think what else to say. “That’s … that’s a lot.”
He tilts his head, lifts one shoulder in a dismissive shrug, then drains the rest of his beer—this time without choking. “That’s it for me tonight, Amy. Can I close out?”
“Of course,” Amy murmurs, moving to the till.
Something about the way this is ending feels wrong. But I don’t know how to make it right. “Well, uh, thanks for the drink,” I offer as he stands from his stool. “And the conversation.”
“Sure thing,” he says, but all the warmth that colored our time tonight has gone out of him.
“I’ll, uh, I’ll see you around, I guess,” I stammer.
He gives me one of those polite sort of smiles where you press your lips together. “Of course.”
“And I’ll keep you posted on the potted trees.”
“‘Preciate it,” he says, but it’s not entirely clear if that’s directed at me or at Amy, who places a receipt in front of him. He signs it quickly, nods to me, and then he’s gone.
Amy stares after him, shaking her head. “That scared him off really easily.” She grins at me, eyes twinkling. “I’ll have to keep that in mind the next time I want to get rid of him.”
I let out a weak laugh. “You need to get rid of him often?”
“Aaron?” She shakes her head. “Nah. But it’s nice to know what’ll work in case I ever do.”