Chapter 14
Appendix G—Health Journal
PARTICIPANT DETAILS
SEX: M
Date of Entry
5/12/23
Current Weight (lbs.)
324
Lost to Date
Calculated BMI
BMI Category
-1 Lbs.
45.2
Morbidly Obese
Please describe your physical, mental, and emotional state as pertains to this clinical trial.
Hi—my name’s Emmett. Not participant number 82941. Because I am a human boy, not a robot. Beep beep boop. Lol j/k. (You’re already regretting letting me do this trial, aren’t you? XD)
Okay, so it’s been a few days since the gene therapy procedure, which I just have to say—what the fuck.
I was… “not prepared” might be the understatement of the century.
Perhaps “totally blindsided” is closer to the mark?
I probably missed the detailed rundown of what was going to happen in that mountain of paperwork you sent me, so I’ll forgive you this time.
But when you start charging people $200–300K for the pleasure, maybe you should make sure they know what they’re getting into? ?? ˉ\_(:D)_/ˉ
Jokes aside, I’m actually not feeling great.
In addition to dealing with the—trauma feels like too strong of a word.
How about *emotional and psychological aftereffects*?
—of the procedure, I felt pretty weak and nauseous after leaving the hospital.
I couldn’t bring myself to eat for a whole 36 hrs. Crazy, right!?! Lol sob.
Yesterday was better—I’m feeling good and eating pretty normally.
But now that my body’s past the initial shock of it, my mind’s starting to catch up and it’s freaking out a little bit.
Honestly? I’m feeling kind of scared. Obviously I haven’t lost any weight yet—in fact, I’ve GAINED a pound, as your automatic calculator so helpfully pointed out to me (NEGATIVE pounds lost?
! Is that REALLY necessary?!?). And even though the nurse said I shouldn’t expect to see any results for a couple of weeks, I can’t help but feel hopeless.
I’m sure your product’s great and all, but you have to understand how many different pills, potions, and diets I’ve tried to lose weight.
None of them have worked and now I’m doing this trial—probably my most drastic attempt yet—and part of me is just kind of depressed about it.
Like, why do I have to be this way? Why’s it so hard for me to control my weight like everyone else, to just do the things I KNOW I’m supposed to do, like eat less and exercise more? When’s the last time I even went to the gym??
Ugh, I should go to the gym.
Of course I’m going to give the trial more time—at this point I don’t have a choice—but no, my “emotional state as pertains to this clinical trial” isn’t great.
As of day four, it feels pretty unlikely that this trial will work out any better than my previous attempts to slim down.
In a month, six months, a year, I’m probably going to be even bigger and more hopeless than I am now. Begging you to prove me wrong :’<(