16 #2
“I’m sorry?” Clare asked, several others having a range of reactions.
I ignored them all and focused on Jean. “She will know how to use that magic you said, and I cannot stomach she’s never paid for anything she’s done.
To any of us.” I glanced over at the Reids.
“What’s been her punishment for killing her own child for Charles’s power?
She admitted she knew he did it no matter the lie spun, right? ”
Mr. Reid seemed less than thrilled to discuss this in the company standing there but understood it had to be handled. “We’ve not filed anything because we cannot come to a consensus on how to handle it.”
I snorted. “Because too many are focused on me instead of…” I made a disgusted noise and focused back on Jean. “She’s not being of any help to you anymore, is she?”
No. It was in Jean’s eyes. The use of Bernice wasn’t worth the problems she caused now and she probably didn’t trust the woman.
She was smart enough not to.
“Then I want Bernice to pay off the debt. She had to have known.” I sighed when Jean opened her mouth. “She knows everything, Jean. That’s what I want from her. I want everything.”
Jean ran her tongue over her teeth. “I stood here and said I wouldn’t push you for answers and yet you’re—”
“Not from you,” I snapped, too tired to be patient.
I tried to calm down but then realized I was more than valid given this development and let Jean see that in my eyes.
“She knows all the gossip about every top-tier family. We’re going to war.
I’m building an army and that benefits you.
I need all the dirty secrets and rumors.
“Not for the council. For us.” I gestured to Winter’s friends and Taylor’s people.
Then Clare and me. “And I need to know more about me. She knows those tutors. She can find those books for me like nothing. Let her do what she can instead of getting in your way.” I snorted.
“Let her help with the shit of the large familiar housing.”
“That’s smart,” Tracey muttered. “No one plans a function like Bernice Shaw, and I will enjoy her having to swallow her bigotry having to help the underprivileged students as well. It’s better than paying our people to deal with top-tier families who will immediately try to take over or harass them.
Council families vs top-tier with us in the middle. ”
“She should do at least this much for you,” I told Jean. “The money benefited her as well and she let it all happen.” I gave her time to think. “You can set up some sort of payment plan for hourly or—”
“Bevin, I adore you, but I don’t know I get paid enough to deal with Bernice Shaw,” Jasmine said, sounding exhausted.
“Marilyn will in a heartbeat,” Mrs. Reid said, sharing a look with her mate, both of them looking like they were having a hard time not laughing. “Please, let Marilyn Oliveria handle it. It will be the best gift ever.”
“I will speak with Grandmother and send everything over,” Jean said. “We can speak when we both have had time with it.” She waited until I nodded. “I’m glad you’re okay. I’m also glad Jason is now… Impotent. I promise I won’t push that button for people to find out unless it’s the only option.”
I nodded, believing her, but others seemed worried. “I’ll let you know if we need to as well.”
“I appreciate it. Please keep me informed.” She turned to leave, having to circle away from the guard station like other guests.
Clare offered to take her home and speak with Bernice since she was involved in all of it. Maybe film the library while there. I asked if she was okay and she stared around at everyone and swallowed loudly.
“I’m sorry,” I whispered. “I promised you…”
She came over and hugged me. “You promised me choices and freedom. You gave me that. You would let me walk away if I wanted to and live quietly. I have no regrets. You’re not judging me for stepping out of this when I need a breather. I’m sorry, I’m just not built like you are.”
“You were awesome today,” I told her and hugged her tightly. “Don’t be sorry for having self-preservation. I’m broken.” I ignored when people gasped, giving Clare a sad smile when she leaned away.
“You’re not,” she rasped, giving me a shake.
“I am,” I told her, finally admitting something I’d known for a long time. “I’ve never feared death. It doesn’t matter to me.” I shrugged even if she was holding onto my arms. “When you’re seven and your parents are trying to kill you—you’re fighting to live for so long, and it all becomes…”
“It stops becoming scary and just feels inevitable?” Winter’s best friend, Danny, asked.
I thought about that a moment. “Maybe. I don’t know, but while I get scared and break, I’m never afraid of actually dying. I haven’t been since Grandpa died. It hurt he was gone. He didn’t feel anything bad leaving.”
Pain flared in my cheek before I even realized what happened. Shock hit me so hard that I couldn’t like put together what had happened.
Until Winter’s other friend, Wes, who had feelings for Clare—and it was mutual—pulled her away from me… And her hand was raised.
She’d slapped me.
She’d slapped me.
I simply blinked at her.
“Thanks, so we can repair our relationship just to destroy me because you don’t care if you live or die?
” Clare choked out. She pulled against Wes.
“No, I’m patient with her and I understand a lot better, but that’s—I’m not being quiet this time.
That’s—she basically just said she doesn’t care if we suffer if she dies. ”
“That wasn’t what I meant,” I whispered, everyone staring at me in ways I didn’t like. I lowered my head. “That wasn’t what I meant.” I turned and walked away, not even sure where I was going.
Danny fell in step with me. “Can I take you to him so you can fill him in? He’s probably losing his mind.”
“That wasn’t what I meant,” I rasped.
He was quiet but then stopped walking. “I know. She’s not wrong in what she heard because she’s broken too.
You both have suffered a lot. We all have.
” He let out a heavy breath. “Winter would have heard the same because of who he’s lost. None of this is easy, but I get you. That’s not what you said.”
“Thank you.” I thanked him again when he brought me to Winter, glad he wasn’t on a call and I could walk right into his arms.
I was actually glad that Danny stayed and filled in some of the gaps for both of us.
“Can he stay and help mediate for us?” Winter asked quietly. “He’s already figured out what you are and feels the same that Link wants you.”
“I don’t think Link realizes it, but I feel like the gods keep pushing you both so he’ll end up being one of the points of your star, and I told Winter that to help him settle with the possibility and probably set off a lot of this jealousy,” Danny admitted.
I slowly nodded, Danny and all of them had signed the right paperwork. Most of them knew I was a goddess witch. I think I knew that but appreciated they always reminded me.
It was really, really difficult to keep track of it all.
“Thank you,” Winter breathed. “First, I’m sorry Clare did that, and I completely agree with Danny that she heard what she did, not what you said. Also, I would have heard the same because of my own traumas. I practically did, but—that’s a tough one to swallow as someone who cares deeply for you.”
“I know. I see that now,” I accepted. “I yelled at Link the same to remember us who…” I swallowed loudly when I saw upset in his eyes. “Winter, I care about him, okay? It’s not like that with us. I believe you that he thinks I’m hot. He’s never acted like it. He’s hot, but he’s not like…”
“Oh boy,” Danny sighed, scrubbing his hand over his neck. “You’re going to have to finish that, Bev.”
“Yeah, I know,” I grumbled. I met Winter’s upset gaze and there was too much for me to lock onto. “You won’t like my answer, but I can tell you it’s not sexual. What I feel for him isn’t romantic.”
“Okay, tell me anyways.”
“This isn’t fair,” I whispered. “You’re going to get worse and it’s not my fault. It’s not his fault for treating me so well.”
“Now I’m confused too,” Danny muttered.
I huffed. “Link is always there for me. He never doubts me. Never makes me feel stupid. Never brushes me off besides one time that he admitted he was just overloaded. He’s the first to always hear me out and always has been.
He’s like my battle buddy or—I don’t know.
Not like I’m his sidekick or he’s mine, but when the shit hits the fan we’re always in it together. ”