Chapter 36
Violet
Four weeks had passed in a blur of intensive training and university coursework, and I was exhausted in ways I hadn't known were possible.
My days started at six in the morning with etiquette lessons.
How to navigate high society events, which fork to use at a twelve-course dinner, how to make polite conversation with senators and foreign diplomats without saying anything of substance.
Then came politics and current affairs, where I learned about lobbying, campaign finance, and how to identify which journalists could be trusted and which ones couldn't.
Afternoons were dedicated to my university classes, which I attended remotely from a private study room in the estate. Business economics, financial analysis, marketing strategy; subjects that felt almost quaint compared to what I was learning about the Club's real operations.
And through it all, there were the investigation sessions with Roman.
Only four of them in four weeks. It wasn't enough, and we both knew it.
We’d met up in my room each time, away from any surveillance, and compared notes on what we knew about Cal's death.
I told him about the puncture mark the autopsy had noted, about the burner phone she'd been clutching, about her friends' recollections of that night.
He told me more about the timeline, about where he'd been, about everyone he could remember seeing at the Halloween party.
But we kept hitting dead ends. No new leads, no breakthroughs, nothing that brought us any closer to understanding who killed my sister.
“We're missing something,” Roman had said during our last session, frustration evident in his voice. “There's a piece we're not seeing.”
I agreed, but I still had no idea what that piece might be.
The one bright spot in all of this was the weekly phone calls with my friends. Roman had kept his word, lending me his phone every Sunday evening so I could check in with Cherry, Jeremiah, Ginny, and Dylan.
The first call had been tense. They were all convinced I was being forced to say I was okay; that someone was holding a gun to my head.
It had taken twenty minutes of increasingly specific personal references—inside jokes and embarrassing stories only we would know—before they finally believed I was really safe and choosing to stay.
“I think you might be a little insane,” Cherry had said, though her voice had been thick with relief. “But if you think this is the best way to find out what happened to Cal... we trust you.”
The subsequent calls had been easier. I couldn't tell them much, but I could hear about their lives, their classes, the mundane campus drama that felt like it belonged to a different world entirely.
Those talks were a lifeline, a way to pretend I still belonged to that world, even as it slipped further out of reach.
But the strangest thing about these four weeks, the thing I couldn't stop thinking about no matter how hard I tried, was Julian's absence.
I'd expected him to break his word. To show up at my door after a few days with some excuse about needing to check on my progress, or to appear during training sessions to observe, or to simply materialize in my room the way he had before, uninvited and overwhelming.
But he hadn't. I hadn't seen him; not even once. Hadn't heard his voice, hadn't felt his presence, hadn't received a single message or any indication that he was even visiting the estate.
He'd actually respected my wishes. Actually given me the space I'd demanded. And I didn't know what to make of that.
Was it genuine respect? Or was it just another form of manipulation; showing me he could be trusted, that he could change, making me lower my guard so he could…
No.
That was paranoid thinking. If Julian wanted to manipulate me, surely he'd choose a less obvious approach than simply giving me what I wanted.
But if it was genuine respect, if he really had stayed away because I told him I needed space, then what did that mean? That he actually cared about what I wanted? That his feelings for me were real, not just obsession?
I didn't know, and not knowing was driving me crazy.
Almost as crazy as the dreams.
God, the dreams…
Over the past four weeks, my subconscious had frequently betrayed me with increasingly vivid fantasies of Julian. His hands on my skin, his mouth on mine, his voice in my ear saying things that made me wake up gasping and disoriented and achingly frustrated.
I kept telling myself it didn't mean anything. That it was just my brain processing the fear and adrenaline from the hunt, and from everything else that had happened between us. That the dreams would fade once enough time had passed.
But they hadn't faded. If anything, they'd gotten worse. Or better, depending on how I looked at it, which I tried very hard not to do.
And now, tonight, all of that confusion and frustration was about to come to a head. Because tonight was the Eleusinian ritual. The first trial.
The sun had set an hour ago, and I was standing in my room wearing the white Grecian gown that had been laid out for me earlier. The fabric was soft and light, draping elegantly from one shoulder and cinched at the waist with a golden cord. It made me look like I'd stepped out of an ancient fresco.
There was a knock at my door.
“Come in,” I called out.
Taisiya entered, carrying a small wooden box. “Miss Calloway,” she said with a gentle smile. “I'm here to escort you to the ritual chamber. But first...” She set the box down on the table and opened it, revealing a delicate golden circlet adorned with olive leaves. “All participants wear these.”
She placed the circlet carefully on my head, adjusting it until it sat perfectly. Then she stepped back and studied me with an appraising eye.
“Beautiful,” she said. “You look like a goddess.”
I didn't feel like a goddess. More like a sacrifice.
“What should I expect?” I asked, trying to keep my voice steady. “No one's really explained what happens during the ritual.”
Taisiya's expression grew sympathetic. “I'm not permitted to say. But...” She hesitated, then added quietly, “Whatever happens tonight, trust yourself."
Okay, that wasn't ominous at all…
She led me through the estate's winding corridors, down staircases I hadn't known existed, deeper into the building's heart. The walls here were older and carved with symbols I didn't recognize.
Finally, we reached a set of massive bronze doors. Taisiya pushed them open, and my pulse quickened at the sight before me.
The ritual chamber was enormous, with a domed ceiling that disappeared into darkness. Torches lined the walls, their flickering light casting dancing shadows across the stone, and in the center of the room stood a raised dais with an altar draped in white silk.
Around the edges of the chamber, seated in tiered rows like an ancient amphitheater, were unmasked Dionysus Club members.
The Council—both senior and junior members—sat in the first two rows, their faces grave and watchful.
Behind them was a mixture of older full members and younger Reapers, their expressions ranging from curious to bored.
I wasn't the only girl here. Nineteen others stood near the dais, all wearing white gowns identical to mine, and all looking just as nervous as I felt.
The other Selection girls. My cohort.
Roman was also in the room, seated in the junior Council row. His eyes found mine immediately, and he gave me a small, encouraging nod. It didn't help much, because Julian was in the room too, standing with the other Reapers, and the moment I saw him, everything else seemed to fade away.
It had been a full month since I'd seen him, and the impact of his presence hit me harder than I expected. He was wearing dark robes that made his blue eyes even more striking, and when our gazes locked, I saw something flash across his face.
Hunger. Relief. Something fierce and possessive that made my heart race despite everything.
One of the senior Council members stood, and the chamber fell silent.
“Welcome, ladies,” he said, his voice echoing through the space.
“Tonight, you will take part in the Eleusinian ritual. It is the proving trial you must undergo before you are fully accepted into our trust and permitted to undertake further training.” He gestured to a small table beside the altar where multiple crystal goblets sat, each filled with a pale, luminescent liquid.
“The ritual has two parts. First, you will drink the sacred elixir. Then you will confess your deepest secret before this assembly. Only truth spoken under the elixir will be accepted.”
My stomach dropped. The so-called elixir was a truth serum. They were going to drug us and make us confess our darkest secrets in front of everyone.
“After the confessions,” the Council member continued, “you will proceed to the second part of the ritual. Private chambers have been prepared for you and your partners. There, you will complete the sacred coupling that binds you to the Club and to each other.”
Oh god.
Roman had warned me about this; had told me I might have to do things I didn't want to do during the training period. But hearing it stated so baldly, and knowing that it would probably be recorded by the Club...
“The ritual begins now,” the Council member said, interrupting my train of thought. “Approach the altar.”
The girls all moved forward as one, and my hands shook as I reached for one of the goblets. The liquid inside smelled faintly of honey and something herbal.
“Drink,” the Council member commanded.
I lifted the goblet to my lips and drank. The elixir was sweet at first, then bitter, then sweet again. It burned slightly going down, and for a moment I felt nothing. Then the world tilted.
Not physically; I was still steady on my feet. But everything felt... different. Like all the walls I'd built around my thoughts and feelings had suddenly dissolved, leaving everything raw and exposed.
This was the truth serum. And it was already working.