Chapter 35
CHAPTER THIRTY-FIVE
M y mouth drops and Tovi sucks in a hard breath, but Eryn isn’t finished.
“However, I think you both understand the gravity of your offenses. Your punishment is life.” Eryn makes eye contact with his father briefly before taking a breath and delivering the rest with so much cruelty that I could almost believe it was true. “Life, as Royal doxies. Guards, take them to the doxy wing.”
Tovi screams. “No! You can’t do this!”
I put a mask of horror on my face as the tears fall from my eyes. But they are tears of relief. That sneaky little shit. He’s a king in the making, after all. I can’t tell if Tovi’s terror is real or also a mask. It sounds real enough, but surely she realizes that this is exactly where we need to go?
“If I may, son?” the king’s voice interjects and my hope, already balancing on a precipice, wobbles dangerously.
“Guards, please take them to the healing wing for inspection first. Divine knows what they have picked up. And keep them in the guest chambers next to the doxy wing. My son’s doxies will need to be kept separate,” he says with as much emotion as if he were talking about a horse, switching his indifferent face to his son and giving him a benevolent smile.
The guards pull us up by our manacled hands as the king leaves the dais, followed by Eryn and Lylle. We’re being marched at sword point down a hallway, Tovi muttering tearfully to herself.
“I can’t do this, Mika!” she says with a voice dipped in panic, pulling away from our guards.
“Yes, you can. Think of your lover,” I say pointedly, hoping to get through to her. “Think about whether they would prefer you dead or as a doxy. ”
“Hurry up royal whores, we don’t have all day,” one of the guards bark, shoving Tovi’s shoulder.
I’m not sure whether she’s clicked yet, but she remains silent for the rest of our trip.
Tovi and I are awaiting a healer, both strapped to reclined chairs and unable to move. It’s been at least half an hour since we saw the guards after they strapped us down and left the room. Tovi and I haven’t dared to speak to each other, not knowing if we could be heard.
The healer arrives—an ordinary man—not a Patron of the Divine. He doesn’t even speak to us; he only washes his hands and then begins inspecting me. Tovi stares intently at me, not taking her eyes off his hands and where they begin to touch me.
“Open your mouth,” the healer orders, in a voice gentler than I was expecting.
“Tilt your head.
“Look left…look right .
“Lift your chin.”
With my face and neck inspected, he begins massaging under my arms and breasts. Tovi’s breath hitches, and I look over to her and mouth, “It’s okay.” She’s not convinced. Hysteria tickles my throat. It’s the second time I’ve mouthed those words in as many hours.
After inspecting every inch of my skin, which unfortunately also involves my clothes being cut from me, I lay completely naked. I’m okay. Tovi is not. He hasn’t even inspected her yet, and the tears are tracking down her face, eyes closed.
My body has not been my own for a long time, if it ever was. This healer’s inspection barely registers compared to other violations inflicted upon me over the years. Perhaps I’m more broken than I thought. Empty and hollow.
“I’ll be right back,” the healer says, not looking at either of us as he dips out the door.
Deciding this wouldn’t be an unusual thing to say if we are being eavesdropped on, I risk it. “Tovi. We can do this. It’s clinical—” Tovi cuts me a look, shaking her head. “—and I’ll be here with you the whole time.”
The healer comes back with what looks like a torture device, and my rage responds. Angry flutters beat against my ribs as he washes his hands again. He gives me a small—not unkind—smile as he spreads my legs apart and uses the device to inspect me more thoroughly between my legs. It’s uncomfortable, and had Tovi not been here, I might have made it more difficult for him just for the sake of it.
“You’re all done. There’s a set of clothes here for each of you. Do I need to get a guard while you get dressed?”
I shake my head and he undoes my bindings. Tovi has begun to pant, the anticipation that her turn is next is overwhelming her.
“Can I…can I hold her hand while you inspect her?” I plead softly, before gr abbing my clothes. I open my mouth to plead more as I dress, but he agrees, and I snap my mouth shut.
I’m dressed in plain cotton underwear and a set of light gray silky pajamas. I wish I could have bathed first. The pants are cuffed at the calf, and the shirt is short-sleeved. Another set is ready for Tovi. The healer has waited for me to get dressed, busying himself washing his hands and the torture— inspection —device.
Tovi’s eyes are pleading with me, and I give her a small smile. “It’s not too bad. He’s gentle.”
He inspects her face and neck first, the same way he did with me. I hold her hand, and she grips me fiercely every time he touches her. I note that he’s touching her less, instructing her verbally more, and only touching her when he has to. His voice is softer as he speaks to her, and he pauses every time her panic looks about to overwhelm her. For all he’s not Gifted, he seems to be in tune with her emotions.
He’s tall, as all Erduborn are—even taller than Beans—probably close to seven feet. He’s older than us, maybe late thirties, with a few creases around his eyes that suggest he likes to smile. His hair is a dark brown, almost black, and kept a similar length to my own. Typical Erduborn brown eyes of the earth against tanned skin, closer to caramel in color than olive. He isn’t unattractive, and his soft demeanor only helps.
The healer warns her when he has to start inspecting her physically. And then he asks her whether she would like to remove her clothes instead of them being cut off. She nods. He allows her to be unbound at the arms to undress her top half, herself.
Once he inspects her top half, he gestures gently to the silky pajamas while looking at me. I hand them to Tovi to dress her top half before she undresses her lower half. I stand over her while he inspects the rest before he gets to the internal exam. She stares at me, and I hold her gaze for as long as I can. But inevitably, the repulsive strain becomes too much, and I look away. And I hate myself that I can’t even help her with something as simple as eye contact.
She hisses and lets out a shuddering breath, and he apologizes while doing the internal exam. It wasn’t painful, it’s definitely uncomfortable and invasive, but not painful. He doesn’t linger, only doing the barest of inspections before removing the tool that allows him to see inside. He nods to me, indicating I can give her the pants now.
With his back to us, he washes the gloves and tool while humming to himself softly. And—I realize—he is giving Tovi more time to regain her composure. Her breathing is still erratic, and a sob escapes periodically. Once she sounds calmer, he returns and sits in a chair facing us. His brow furrows as he writes something in a folder in his lap.
His dense, almost black beard is kept short. His nose is slightly hooked, and he has a broad mouth with full lips—lips that he chews on every now and then.
“What’re your names?” he asks us, catching me studying him.
“Mika.” I wait for Tovi to offer her name, but after a moment when it’s clear she isn’t going to, I answer for her. “And this is Tovi. What’s your name?”
“Otto,” he says with a smile, which reaches his eyes. The reason for those creases.
Otto blows out a breath, reading his notes, and then studies Tovi for a moment before giving me a sympathetic look. My rage—which I hadn’t even realized was asleep—perks up a little. Does he have bad news?
“You’re both in perfect health,” he says, then leans forward to whisper with an exaggerated grimace. “Unfortunately.”
Tovi snaps her eyes up at him then, finally looking at him for the first time since he walked in.
He continues. “You’re both healthy enough to be Royal doxies. And as you’re both Patrons, I don’t have to warn you to drink the tea to prevent pregnancy. I do, however, have a different kind of tea. If you need it. Ofori…” He looks at both of us to see if we recognize it. I do, but Tovi doesn’t.
“It makes you…care less , Tovi,” I say, nodding to him in thanks. With the way she’s behaving, it would be odd if we didn’t accept the tea, even though we won’t actually need it.
“You usually get an hour or two warning. That should be enough time to drink the tea. Even cold-brewed, it’ll be effective,” Otto adds, getting up to search cupboards, grunting as he digs around. When he finds it, he holds it out to Tovi, who doesn’t take it, and then hands it to me instead.
“Do you two need more time…before…” he says softly, gesturing to the door.
“Tovi?”
“No. Let’s go,” she says with a detached voice that sends a chill into my bones. Somehow, she is looking stronger than I’ve seen in days.
“Thank you,” Tovi says to me when we’re deposited into some guest chambers.
I had tried to take note of our location as we walked, but it was impossible with so many winding corridors. The doors to our guest chambers were small, opening into a tiny receiving room where only a chair on either side would fit. Then the set of large ornate doors into the chambers themselves were opened.
The sitting room is large. Tovi and I sit in oversized sofa seats that face a massive window, looking out onto the city. As suspected, we’re in the east wing, but it’s hard to tell which floor from our vantage point. The window doesn’t open, nor do we have a balcony.
There is one big bedroom at the end of the room with two large beds, a washroom for us to share, and a giant wall of windows along one wall of the sitting room. The sun is setting, a beautiful sunset baking the horizon with golds and reds, warming the colors of our chambers.
“You’re welcome,” I finally reply. “How are you doing?”
“Sick to my stomach. What are we?—”
I hold a finger up to my lips to silence her question and she frowns. I point to my eyes and ears and then around the rooms. She nods. We both search the room: every picture, corner, and wall for any kind of holes or ways to spy on us.
Nothing. I quickly scan the ceiling and floors, but nothing obvious stands out. Releasing the breath I had been holding to keep my rage in check, I yell, “Fuck me!” and then laugh, an edge of hysteria in it.
Tovi whips around, looking at me like I’ve lost it entirely.
I give her the biggest, dirtiest, scheming grin I could possibly muster and run at her. She takes a step back, still looking at me like I’m crazy, but a smile tugging at her lips when I shake her shoulders.
“He’s with us, Tovi. The prince!”
“What? How? ”
I shake my head, still not quite believing it. “We— I —broke into his rooms a few nights ago. We had a half-cocked plan to kidnap him and force the king’s hand. But then the prince…was not who we expected.”
“He looked as fucking expected to me!” she hisses .
I laugh softly, full of pride for the little prince. “I know. He did so well. This wasn’t planned, he didn’t even know I’d been captured until we saw each other. He said he would help to find Amarilyss. It seems she was nice to him when they met, and so, we trusted each other.”
“You are trusting a complete stranger. Well, that’s a Divine miracle, isn’t it?” Tovi drawls, shoving my shoulder gently as she sits down.
“He didn’t know about you either because I didn’t know you were here. The kid did all of that on his own.”
“You’re sure this isn’t some sick game? That he hasn’t just fucked us over royally ?”
I scrunch my face and shrug. “He looked pretty sick about it to me.”
“You mean ‘menacing and vicious,’ right?”
A knock startles us both, and an elderly Patron ambles in with a trolley of food. All discussions are forgotten as the smell of real food hits us. I am famished and my stomach is growling, but Tovi looks positively delirious at the sight of real food.
“Careful,” I warn. “You might make yourself sick.”
“Worth it.” She grins, already shoving a buttered bread roll into her mouth.
The Patron gives me a courteous nod as she leaves, her violet eyes a reminder. I watch Tovi stuff her face, gravy dripping down her chin, while I pick at my food.
“Are you going to eat that?” she asks, pointing at the chicken drumstick I haven’t touched.
I pick it up and take a massive bite out of it, then with my mouth still full, lick the gravy off the other side in one swipe. I offer it to her with a smirk. I nearly choke when she shrugs and takes it from me and continues to eat it where I left off .
She’s chewing open-mouthed through a smile, and I narrow my eyes at her in question.
“You didn’t think I’d take it. Suck shit. Object empathy , remember,” she says, spinning the half-eaten leg between her fingers.
“Hope you felt how stupid I think your face is too.”
She sighs, giving me a side eye as she puts her plate to the side. “No. But I could feel that you’re anxious about something. Something you want to ask me but don’t know how.”
“All that from some chicken? Sheesh.” I try to joke but earn myself a kick in the shins instead.
I groan, this isn’t going to go down well. “What color are the king's eyes to you?”
“Brown,” she says, as if I’m stupid. “Brown like the Erdu earth. Why ?”
“Okay. What does he look like?”
She raises her hands in the air in an exasperated half-shrug. “Tall. Dark brown hair kept short on the sides with a—” She gestures at the top of her head. “—floopy bit up here. Roundish face, large and wide nose, no facial hair. What in the Divine, Mika?”
She’s describing the king, except for his eyes. I see those violet eyes, and she doesn’t.
I open my mouth to say it, but I can’t. Maybe I didn’t see his eyes properly. It’s not like I really looked at them.
Tovi flicks a pea at me. “Tell me,” she demands, pointing at me with the chicken then taking another bite.
Taking a deep breath, I hold it for a few seconds, then let everything out in a rush. “I see his eyes as violet like a Gifted Patron of the Divine but I see him as everything else you describe except his eyes and maybe I didn’t see them properly but I’m pretty sure I did and what if I just found out my Gift is that I can see through glamors or something and there’s someone masquerading as the King Oferdu?” I finish with a squeak and then take a deep breath. “Tovi, am I insane?”
Eyes and mouth wide open, she stares at me, her eyes flicking off to the side periodically. Swallowing her mouthful of chicken and squeezing her eyes shut. “What? Repeat that again, slowly .”
When I’m finished, she looks no different than when I said it the first time.
“ Tovi !” I whine when she still hasn’t said anything.
“I’m thinking!” she hisses back. “No one has said anything about him having violet eyes before.”
“I know.”
“Not even a whisper of a rumor.”
“I know .”
“We—Riley, Beans, Bitty, and I—have been here so many times and none of them have ever said anything either. They would have if they saw it too…”
“ I know! ”
“No wonder the chicken felt anxious.”
I growl and push her with my foot, digging my toes into the side of her thigh until she slaps at me.
“You should ask the prince when you see him. Surely if dear old daddy Erdu is acting differently, he would be the one to know?”