37. Cash
Cash
Walter wasn’t well enough to go out on his own. He could’ve joined another pack, maybe, but I knew deep down I was right: This pack had taken care of him, and there were no assurances that anyone else would.
It wasn’t Grant’s pack that’d done it either, but the first sprouting seeds of this new one. It’d been Leo and Katya and kindness.
He’d be a fool to go.
Getting sick or injured humbled a wolf, and there weren’t many who’d experienced that. Sometimes, with age, brutal pack conflicts, or abject cruelty, mishaps happened, but I didn’t think Walter was going anywhere of his own volition.
I didn’t know outright if there was any reason Walter shouldn’t be a part of our pack.
People like Marcus had made their corruption perfectly known, and I had no doubt that there were people who Grant had tried to bestow “favors” on who, sick as it was, would’ve taken advantage without saying anything about it.
But there were also people who’d been taken in by the cult of personality that Grant had built around himself, who remembered Reeve and were glad to have dodged some of his brutality, and who feared change now.
I hoped this was the case with Walter, but from the uncomfortable looks on a few faces, I had no doubt our pack would be smaller tomorrow than it was today. If we were lucky, the trash would take itself out.
Regardless, even if we found out every abuser was dead or had fled, we needed to provide support for those who’d endured abuse and a safe place for them to name the people who’d hurt them and know that they’d be safe from now on. Somehow, I thought Aleks wasn’t the right person to lead that effort.
As kind as he was, and as much as he could empathize with that particular kind of pain, after the alphas we’d known, I couldn’t imagine how intimidating it would be to talk to him first.
Maybe Katya? Everyone knew her to be kind and patient, and when I was a child, her smile and her ready tea cakes had been a comfort.
I’d talk to her about it, maybe even get Evie’s input.
It wasn’t her responsibility, or the responsibility of any child who’d lived in fear, to figure out the support we ought to provide them, but they knew what they needed, and their insight and comfort would be paramount to ensuring we could move forward and build something better.
They were our future, and it was our responsibility to support them as best we could.
One thing at a time, though. Right then, I needed to see—
Pa’s house was there beyond the edge of the square, but it was dark and there was no movement within it.
For a second, my stomach dropped. Something could’ve happened after I’d left, but I—I didn’t think Aleks, Leo, and Viktor would have left before Grant. They’d have known. They’d have told me. And once Grant had left pack lands, I couldn’t imagine why anyone would want to hurt my father.
But he wasn’t at home. It was dark and empty, and my stomach clenched.
He’d have come out if he’d been there. Even if he was slow, Evie wasn’t.
Before panic could set in, movement beyond the trees caught my eye, a flash of dark hair and long limbs.
“Cash!” Evie’s cry cut through the square and she bounded out of the forest from the direction of the new houses and across the space to leap through the air. She wrapped her arms around my neck, and her sheer velocity had me spinning us both around until her feet hit the dirt.
She grinned up at me, her emerald eyes sparkling with tears. “I’m so glad you’re okay. We smelled blood and I thought—”
Fast, she shook her head, unable to put words to the horror of it.
I tucked her hair behind her ear. “I’m fine, I swear. I’m sorry I couldn’t tell you sooner. I’m sorry I didn’t come find you.”
She kept shaking her head, letting out a wet laugh. “It’s okay. Aleks let Leo know while we were still making our way back. I knew you were okay, just—”
She made a little muffled sound, then dove in and squeezed me as tight as she could. Her thin arms had surprising strength, and I wheezed as I hugged her back. I couldn’t begrudge her any bit of air she wanted to squeeze out of me.
I looked past the top of her head to see Pa leaning hard on his walking stick, coming out of the woods.
The way he smiled at me was soft and sad, and understanding unfolded between us from a tiny bunched up thing that’d lodged in my heart like a bullet, into a broad, smooth sheet on which every decision we’d ever made was written out so plainly that it all made perfect sense.
Why he’d protected me. How impossible it was for him to regret it, even when I wished he hadn’t.
How even though I hated that he’d been hurt, he wouldn’t have done a single thing differently.
It was love, and family, and even though I wasn’t Evie’s father, she was mine and the way I loved her was too big to explain. It covered everything. I could’ve lost a leg or my pack or my life, and if she was okay, it wouldn’t matter.
Even Aleks—I wanted him more than I’d ever wanted anything or anybody, but even that couldn’t come at her expense.
How lucky was I, that he and his family had fought for mine? They’d made us stronger and kept her safe when I couldn’t.
I held Pa’s eye, and his chin dipped subtly. My heart squeezed hard, and I pressed a firm kiss to the top of her head.
I might never be able to tell her how sorry I was that I’d taught her how to run before I’d shown her how to play gin rummy, or that she’d spent so much time hiding when she should’ve been standing in the sunshine, but things were going to be better now.
I’d make them better if it cost me everything I had.
When her arms loosened, I slipped my hand into hers and squeezed. Taking half a step back, I turned to Aleks. “I should go catch up with Pa.”
He frowned, and his hand looped around my wrist. It wasn’t a possessive grip, but nerves had curled my hand into a loose fist. We were in front of the whole pack, and I didn’t know where I fit or what I could have.
It wasn’t like when it was just Viktor and us, and I’d slept comfortably with my face smooshed against Viktor’s shoulder and Aleks curled around me from behind, his hand slipped under my shirt to mindlessly stroke the smooth skin he’d healed just by existing.
I’d been happy then, but I wasn’t under any illusions that I could complicate things for him now. Nobody sane would want another alpha like Grant or Reeve, but that didn’t mean everyone would accept me beside him.
Maybe it was better for me to stay out of the way, get back to building.
But standing there in front of everybody, he held my wrist and slipped his fingers beneath mine to press into the cup of my palm.
“Just a second,” he said. “I’ll come with you.”
He turned to the gathered crowd and scanned all of them. “Does anyone intend to challenge me tonight?”
He waited, and there was no answer. A few people shook their heads. Many of the women were staring at him, wide eyed, as if the foundation of their worlds had shifted and they didn’t know what to do with it.
I thought anyone who’d dare challenge him had died back in those woods north of San Francisco, but I held my breath, hoping I was right.