Chapter 10 #2
Definitely felt like stealing even if she was pretty sure that Thunder and the others would have told her to take whatever she wanted if she’d asked.
Maybe they were using her, and the conversation she’d overheard yesterday certainly implied that they were, they still seemed to be somewhat decent human beings, and she didn't think they’d want her to freeze to death.
So she had dressed in layers, wearing more than she needed to, so she had something to keep her going for a while.
She’d also found a backpack in her wardrobe and loaded it up with as many snacks as she could fit in.
They wouldn't last long, but at least they were something.
Hopefully, enough to get her to the nearest town.
Once she got there, she would figure out her next move. Maybe she could get a job waitressing or something. Someplace where someone would be willing to pay her in cash because she didn't have a bank account or any form of ID to get herself one.
If she was ready at some point to contact her family, she’d do it, but right now she needed time and space to figure out who she was. Time and space to untangle the mess of emotions lodged inside her.
This had felt like the perfect place to do that. She’d thought she had that time and space she needed right there. A place to feel safe, a place without pressure, a place to just exist with people who weren't expecting anything from her.
But they were expecting something from her.
Using her for different reasons than the people who had abducted her, sold her, bought her, but using her, nonetheless.
Which was why she knew she was making the right move.
Really, it was the only move she could under these circumstances.
Still, there was a pang of regret as she looked around the room that had been hers for just a few days and yet had already begun to feel like home.
She’d done a quick clean, dusting everything, making sure there were no crumbs anywhere.
The bed was made, the bathroom was all wiped down, every sign that she’d ever been there was removed.
Almost.
These men might be intending to use her, but she couldn’t really fault them for the reasons behind that.
Truth was, Dr. Gardner deserved to be tortured and killed for what he’d done to her and the things he’d done to Thunder and his team, his sister, Whitney, and Indigo, and all the others. If there was something she could do to help make that happen, then she couldn’t not do it.
So she’d left behind some things she remembered the man saying to her, places he’d mentioned, people he’d mentioned, things he’d mentioned.
It probably wasn't enough. By the time she’d been sold to Master, she’d already had two previous owners, so she’d already pretty much checked out emotionally by then, found her hiding place inside her mind, and stuck there.
She wasn't this magical answer to all their problems that they seemed to think she was. Really, she wasn't even worth the effort they were putting into trying to get her to open up. But she’d give them what she had. A kind of payment for the room and food they’d shared with her these last few days.
With a last look behind her, Maya resolutely turned her back on the room. It might have been the first safe place that she’d had in half a lifetime, but if she kept focusing on what was behind her, she’d never be able to see what was in front of her.
Maybe there was a whole new, amazing world out there. Just waiting for her to embrace it. Things had changed a lot in the last thirteen years, the world wasn't the same as she remembered it, but that didn't have to be a bad thing. New friends, even a new family could be waiting for her.
Time to focus on that, and not the things she couldn’t change.
Creeping quietly through the halls, she now remembered the way from her room down to the grand staircase.
The front doors lay just below it, across the large foyer.
This place really was amazing, a gothic mansion decorated like it was the set of a movie.
She’d miss it even though her memories were tainted now because of what she’d overheard.
Her mom had always told her that she shouldn’t snoop if she wasn't prepared to accept that she might hear something she didn't want to know.
Only this time she hadn't really been snooping.
All she’d been doing was seeking out a man she’d gotten attached to because his presence soothed her.
It had been stupid to believe that a man like Thunder could feel anything for her in return.
It had all been a ruse, a game, pretending to care about her, walking the grounds with her, the art studio and the lessons he’d told her he wanted.
For all she knew, he was actually an amazing artist, and he’d just been pretending to be awful to reel her in.
Doubting everything made her feel like the tentative steps she’d been taking to find solid ground to stand on had been erased, and the ground was cracking everywhere.
Hard as it was to accept, maybe there was no solid ground close enough for her to take refuge on it.
Nothing seemed to have changed in the house. It was still dark, still quiet, so she assumed nobody knew she was about to run.
If they knew, they’d stop her.
Even if she told them she’d left the few scraps of information she had behind for them.
Maybe they wouldn’t keep her locked up as Master had, but they would likely call her family, force her hand, make her contact them even if she wasn't ready for that.
Padding across the foyer, Maya paused for a second as her hand closed around the door handle.
She was really doing this. It was terrifying because she had no plan, no idea what she was doing, or even where she was going.
She knew there were bad people in the world and there was a chance one of them might get their hands on her, and she could wind back up in the same kind of situation she’d just been rescued from.
But she didn't have a choice.
She had to do this.
So she yanked open the door and stepped out into the night.
A mixture of terror and elation washed over her as she walked down the porch steps. Above her, the sky was clear, inky black with a million shimmering stars dotted about. The moon was high above her, its light so bright that it illuminated her way.
With exhilaration over the control she was enacting over herself and her life, Maya broke into a run as she headed for the trees.
In this moment, the lack of a plan didn't matter.
All that mattered was that she was outside, free, soaking in the cold air, and taking deep breaths, her nose filled with the woodsy scents of the outdoors.
Everything she’d been deprived of for so many years was now laid out in front of her and she loved it.
She ran like she could outrun her past.
Ran until her lungs ached, demanding rest so they could drag in mouthfuls of this beautiful, fresh air. Only then did she pause, leaning back against a tree trunk, head tipped back, letting the dappled moonlight wash over her face, while she focused on refilling her lungs so she could run again.
When she was ready, she took off again. From all her walks with Thunder around the grounds, Maya had a vague idea of where she was going. A place in the fence she’d seen suggested she could climb from the trees on this side to the trees on the other side.
After that, she’d just run until she found a road, follow it to a town, and deal with what happened next when she got there.
Her desire to embrace her newfound freedom led to her making a mistake.
She wasn't paying attention to her surroundings.
When arms suddenly snapped around her, tackling her to the ground, she was caught completely by surprise.