Chapter 9 #2
“I can’t. I can’t do anything. We are not here,” I whispered, heart pounding in my chest while Vanessa’s screams mixed with the battle surrounding us.
Thankfully, Dante jumped in to help her, extinguishing the flames with his Twilight… And then my fire attacked him too.
Dante fought to protect himself from my power and Natasha’s silent tears cut through me while I witnessed her pain—one I’d directly or indirectly inflicted. Because of me, she was seeing the people she loved be hurt by her own power, by my power, but unable to do anything about it.
Star’s tears joined Natasha’s, and every single inch of my being fiercely hardened with rage and impotence. I hated feeling powerless, and yet, something told me this wasn’t the worst of it all.
“No! Not Hannes!”
Star’s shout turned to howls of pain, yanking me out of my thoughts to find Hannes, the man with the dangerously adorable smile brought to his knees by my Eternal Blaze.
Not him too…
Wrapping my arms around Star’s neck, I cradled her head to my shoulder and away from the gruesome sight. I held her while she cried, silently hoping Hannes was stronger than the others, able to fight back even while the flames melted parts of his chest open.
Sadly, Dante’s magic was no longer working. My power had bested it.
“Remember, he is okay now,” I whispered in Star’s ear, gently stroking her fur to help her calm. “He’s holding your hand back in the room. Hannes is safe.”
It didn’t feel as though that was true, though. It felt like we were witnessing me kill one of Natasha’s mates.
A mighty roar tore through the night, and the Beast burst out of Hannes’s skin the next second. He stood, the flames vanishing from his body with the shift until only a rising curl of smoke was left of them.
Relief shot through my being, but the aching remained.
“He’s fine. Look…”
Star hesitantly turned, to find him standing tall as the glorious Beast. Her head hung in relief, even when tears still rolled over her furry cheeks.
“Why would you do that to them?!” she yelled, the hurt in her eyes scorching me.
“I didn’t. We were unconscious inside of Natasha from the blow to her head. The fire got out of control. I couldn’t stop it… I wasn’t really there.”
Star nodded, but it was clear she still blamed me.
“I would have stopped it, Star. Of course, I would have. I swear to you…”
My chest stung with the look she afforded me, but I didn’t say anything more. I wasn’t sure anything would suffice or make up for what we had just seen.
“They didn’t take me, I’m right here!” Natasha shouted, now behind us. “Tell them to come back, I’m here!”
“They didn’t take me…”
A slow chill ran through my veins with her words, and my breath halted. Fuck. They had taken someone.
Without thinking or giving Star a heads-up, I dashed toward the beach, in the same direction as the Vampiri now fleeing.
To my dismay, I caught the moment Anastasia’s unconscious, blood-stained body was thrown into a helicopter by Ryker and his goons, the machine lifting off the ground before everyone could get on it.
The shifters left behind were killed by our people.
Dresden ran toward a second helicopter lifting off the ground. Jumping, he transformed mid-air, landing as a huge white wolf inside it. The Countess ordered some of her men to join him, and they jumped into the chopper with some of our guards to help Dresden catch Ryker and rescue Natasha’s mother.
Once they disappeared in the sky, I turned around, glancing back to where Star had stayed. Countess Dariah was standing before Natasha now, her expression filled with both torment and strength while she spoke to her.
My gaze connected with Star’s when Natasha’s shout of pain rippled through the night.
She’d lost them. She had lost her parents after just getting them back.
Natasha ran past me to the beach, falling to her knees while she called after her mother.
André went to her side to comfort her…
The rest of it was a blur, but through it all, my eyes never left Star’s. I walked back to her side, knowing full well that she blamed me for this… Not just for Natasha, but what everyone else had suffered under my fire’s unleashed power.
The worst part was being unable to deny it.
I sensed the power of the crystal leave my temple once it was all over, but even when my awareness returned to the room, my mind was still back there. Savagery had taken over a night supposed to be a celebration, a final welcome home to Natasha, and I couldn’t unsee what I’d just witnessed.
My eyes remained on the far wall beyond the Countess for several moments, until the increasing warmth on my right hand called my attention.
It wasn’t that Hannes, the man, held my hand in his that alarmed me; he’d promised he would—regardless of the form. It was the fact that I found white fur just under his fingers when I looked down… it extended to my elbow.
Jumping to my feet, I shook my arm violently, willing for the grey, crystal-like curved claws and the fur to retreat. It didn’t.
“Star, stop it!”
“Fuck you!”
“Are you okay?” Hannes asked, troubled by my reaction, but I just shook my arm again, trying to force it away.
“Let me go!”
Thankfully, the third time was the charm… until blue fire erupted from my now human hand.
A flame surged with vengeful fury, almost reaching Hannes’s face, and he staggered backward—the Beast taking over him.
“Sorry, I didn’t mean to!” I blurted, gripping my fist against my chest and extinguishing the fire.
When I looked up at him, the expression on his face tore through me. A dangerous warning growl began in the back of the Beast’s throat, startling me, but Hannes successfully silenced it.
“I’m okay, Natalia.” He spoke softly, his voice deep and gruff, but sounding more like the man. “I promise.”
“Don’t you dare fucking hurt him again…”
Star’s “or else” was clear, but it wasn’t her threat, nor the sudden thundering of my heart that made me step away from him…
It was that word, again.
The scene replayed in my mind while I looked into his eyes, and I saw him fall to his knees on the blood-covered snow as his chest melted. He’d fought my fire with every ounce of strength he had, trying to stop the flames from destroying him but only the Beast had succeeded.
Dragging my gaze away from Hannes, I walked past André and Dante to the bookcase, pretending to search for a book while knowing that everyone behind me was probably exchanging a What the fuck? look.
No, I hadn’t fallen apart, but the experience shook me, not that I would ever let them see that.
“Give us the room,” Countess Dariah ordered, and everyone retreated without a sound, even our mates.
“Do not ask me if I’m okay,” I forewarned her after the door closed, picking out a book about the 80s. Flipping through it for a few seconds, I placed it back on the already-read side—making a mental note to watch Back to the Future.
“I won’t,” she assured me. “I already know how you feel.”
Something in her voice made me turn around, finding both resilience and pain coloring her expression.
A heavy sigh left me. “I never meant—”
“I know.” Standing from the chair, she offered me a small smile and walked toward the balcony, her gaze getting lost in the horizon.
“Let me tell you a great truth about us, Natalia. No matter how much we hurt, no matter what we must go through, or how far we must walk in darkness sometimes, we will always push through. We will always endure.”
I went to her side.
“We are built differently, you and I,” she continued.
“We have an inner strength that many will never know, and sometimes, even the things that shatter us show us exactly who we are meant to be. Not because those fractures help us grow. But because in those moments, we make ourselves as formidable as we need to be to survive, regardless of what it takes.”
Pride and power exuded from her in waves with every word, and I knew exactly what she meant.
“It would be an honor to one day be the kind of Vampiress you—”
“I’m not talking about being a Vampiress, darling.
Though it does come with many advantages.
” Turning to face me, Mother’s steely eyes bore into mine.
“I’m talking about being a woman. When life seems impossible and pain threatens to consume us, this inner strength takes over us.
We might not even realize we have it, but it’s always there, ready to turn us into warriors. ”
Lifting a hand to my cheek, she cradled it, looking at me like Isis often looked at her Natasha.
“It’s not an accident that you are the one with us right now, darling.
You are Natasha’s inner strength. The side of her that will fight to protect her and do whatever it takes to survive the pain currently threatening to destroy her.
You, Natalia, are her warrior… and that is exactly what she needs. ”
Letting go of my cheek, Mother walked back into the room.
As I glanced at the sky’s reflection on the still waters surrounding the island, Natasha’s pain stirred within the darkness restraining it, and I felt the powerful truth in each of Countess Dariah’s words. Natasha, Star, and I might be “fractured”, but I would protect them no matter what.
Wrapping my arms around us, I lowered my head and placed a soft kiss on my shoulder.
“I’m sorry. I’m sorry I wasn’t there when you needed me to protect you.
I’m sorry I trusted the people who should have looked after you but were the first ones to hurt you.
I’m sorry you had to be strong in everyone’s eyes and pretend you were okay while you were aching inside.
I’m here now, and I will never let anyone hurt you again… ”
The midafternoon sunlight shimmered over the water as a wave of emotion overwhelmed my chest in response, and I opened myself to it.
Tears gathered in my eyes, and I let one flow freely, allowing myself to feel it fully, even if it was merely a fraction of the pain Natasha was trying to conceal from us.
Making a point to remember how it felt as the tear rolled down my cheek, I experienced its cold and wet trail along my skin until it fell off my chin. Its sensation soon turned into a burning, and growing ache, before evolving into resolve, feminine rage, and the conviction that would fuel me.
I was Natasha’s warrior, and now that I was finally set free, I was going to fight for her like she deserved.
Without bothering to wipe my cheek, I whirled around and marched right through the room.
“What are you doing?” Countess Dariah questioned, making it to my side when I reached the door.
“Exactly what I am here to do. I’m going to get Natasha’s mother back.”