Chapter 81
Lex
EIGHTEEN YEARS AGO
Weeks passed.
Or was it months?
Time was an arbitrary concept down here. There were no windows to see the passing of time. Just the bells and men in black robes who woke us, fed us, and tortured us.
For all I knew, our torture was in the middle of the night, our sleep during the day.
Their methods became increasingly barbaric and painful.
Fingers and toes broken and mended.
Ribs bruised and scraped by sharp daggers.
Blades plunged into flesh at various intervals.
Women sucking and fucking my cock.
Men fucking my asshole.
It was all the same.
I grew numb.
Some days, we were blindfolded so we couldn’t anticipate when their blades would strike.
Some days, the room was bathed in complete darkness.
Those days were the worst. Unable to see, but still able to hear the painful cries of despair, to smell when another subject died.
Men and women came and went.
Some lasted longer than others.
But they all inevitably succumbed to their torture. Their Awakenings painful and eventually taking their lives.
I stopped caring completely—there was no room for it when my ultimate goal was survival.
The only thing that kept me tethered to reality, kept me sane, was Faylinn. I felt a kinship with her—something that went beyond physicality. She wasn’t a sister, certainly not a lover, but she was mine.
And I loved her.
Her cries of pain were the worst.
She pleaded with them. Begged until she was a sobbing mess—tears running down her face to mix with the snot from her nose. Saliva pooled in her mouth from the pain, dripping into her hair.
Faylinn’s little cries of agony and sobbing shouts of “please” were a worse torture than the hot blades plunged into my flesh.
My body felt physically ill, my stomach threatening to expel what little food I was given every time her voice broke from her suffering.
“P-please, please. No. No, stop. Please s-s-stop.”
If any of the other men and women in the space cried or spoke to the men in black robes, I didn’t hear it. I didn’t care.
Faylinn was the only one who mattered.
“Stop, please just stop. I don’t feel anything in my blood Awakening. Please, please, PLEASE.” Her last word ended on a shout and a scream as something was sliced across her flesh. I could hear the distinct sucking noise as it was removed and her broken yell as it was pushed in again.
“Please stop,” I whispered.
The man in black robes halted with a blade poised over my chest. I’d blocked out his actions hours ago—my brain wholly focused on Faylinn and her agony.
“You’ve never said a word. Not once in the three months you’ve been here,” he rasped, and I involuntarily stiffened.
Months? Shit.
The timing was less of a surprise than it should have been. Instead, I was worried that I gave myself away. I opened my eyes to the quizzical stare of the man.
Slowly, a triumphant smile spread across his face, and he dropped his blade to the metal side table before methodically wiping the blood from his hands with a towel.
“You know,” he mused, “there is more than one way to inflict pain. Clearly, your body doesn’t feel physical torture. But mental?”
My breaths came in quick pants, my hands curling into fists as each muscle in my body tightened.
“Emotional? Yes, that’s something we haven’t used on you before.” The man pat my shoulder as if thanking me.
“You!” He turned from me to gesture to another man in black robes. “Move your subject. This one needs . . . a special placement.”
My throat constricted around nothing as saliva pooled in my mouth, nausea roiling in my gut.
The table I was strapped to began to move, Faylinn’s screams growing louder as we traveled.
No, no, no, no.
“Here we are. Your new spot. Doesn’t she just look so beautiful with blood running down her skin?” the man whispered in my ear as the top half of the table was raised. I was in a seated position now, the table turned so I had a full view of Faylinn lying naked on the table next to me.
But it wasn’t her nakedness that fazed me. Bodies were bodies at this point.
It was the thousands of cuts that littered her flesh. Some old and scarred, others fresh and still oozing blood onto the table underneath her body. My heart jolted in my chest at the sight, the need to protect her nearly overwhelming.
I couldn’t watch, yet I also couldn’t look away, as another man in black robes made a scarring cut down her sternum, blood instantly rushing to the surface as Faylinn begged and whimpered.
My heart thundered in my chest, sweat cascading down to mingle with the residual blood from my own torture. I hissed a breath when the salty liquid made contact with an open wound, but my pain was inconsequential compared to what I witnessed.
“Look, girl.” Faylinn’s torturer gestured to me with his knife, simultaneously stepping out of her line of sight so she had a clear view of me sitting next to her.
Tears pooled in Faylinn’s eyes as she sluggishly held my gaze with her own.
She was dying.
“She’s dying. Please stop. Please. I’ll do whatever you want. Just don’t kill her.” My plea was broken and caused Faylinn’s tears to fall faster.
“Lex,” she whispered. “It’s okay, Lex. It’s okay.”
I shook my head as best I could with it still held down by a leather strap.
“It’s not, Faylinn. It’s not. I wish you were never brought here. Never met me. Never experienced this.” I felt my own tears track down my face, hot and salty as they hit my lips.
The men in robes stepped to the side, observing our interaction like the experiment we were.
“I don’t,” she said, her voice strong and clear in the moment. I shook my head to deny her statement, but she continued.
“I don’t. Not for a minute. Because if I wasn’t here, I wouldn’t have known you. Known your heart. And it is a beautiful heart, Lex.”
Sobs wracked my body as I watched her eyes flutter, closing briefly before opening again.
“Stay with me, Fay. Stay with me,” I urged.
She smiled. Even now, with bodily fluids covering her face, her smile lit her whole body. Lit the whole godsdamned room.
“I like when you call me Fay. No one has ever called me that before.” Her voice was a faded whisper, barely distinguishable over the cacophony of sound in the room.
“No, no, no. Fay. FAYLINN!” I screamed, and the men in robes jumped into action, both of them rushing to Faylinn’s bed, obscuring my view of her completely.
They muttered to each other as a bag of fluid was brought from one of the cabinets in the back, and a Water Mage began to funnel it into Faylinn’s small, broken form.
They’re saving her? I was struck dumb for a moment. They’d never—never—saved a subject before.
She’s special. But I knew that already.
I watched, scarcely able to breathe, as they brought a second and third bag of clear fluid to Faylinn’s table.
“Blood,” I heard someone mutter. “We need blood.”
“Me.” My voice was loud, commanding. With more bite and urgency than I’d ever put into it. “Take it from me.”
A man in black robes instantly turned around and sliced into my right arm without a second thought. I hissed at the sudden sting but swallowed any discomfort.
This was for Faylinn. I could handle a little cut and blood loss.
The Water Mage came to my side and began to funnel the blood from my arm into a similar cut on Faylinn’s.
Slowly, after what felt like years, the color returned to Faylinn’s cheeks. Her breathing evened out, her wounds stopped bleeding.
The men in black robes stepped away, their postures tense as they waited to see if she would wake.
Eventually, Faylinn’s eyes fluttered open and her gaze immediately found my own. Where I expected anger, or even pain, all I saw was gratitude and an overwhelming weight of love.
The force of her emotions floored me, and I tried to rub the space over my heart. It was like she was inside me.
Faylinn rolled her lips as she adjusted herself beneath the straps holding her down. She gave me an imperceptible shake of her head before the men in robes unlatched her and brought her back to our cells.
The whole time I watched, dumbfounded.
What in the name of the gods just happened?
Later that night, Faylinn and I had our hands clasped through the bars of our cell walls, just as we did every night. Our bodies were pressed against the metal, trying to get as close as possible. Her small breasts pressed through spaces in the bar, rubbing against my own bare chest.
But I felt no sexual attraction.
Only an intense need to touch her, to comfort her, to feel her skin on my skin and ensure she was safe. Whole.
“I’m okay, Lex,” she whispered, her chest moving against mine with every word, every inhale.
“But you weren’t.” We’d been having this argument for the past few hours, each of us stubbornly refusing to give in to the other.
She sighed before closing her eyes, her eyelashes dusting her cheeks.
“Lex,” she begged tiredly, but I shook my head.
“No, Fay. I watched you . . . die. I won’t survive that. I won’t.” It was a truth I felt all the way to the very marrow of my being.
“You may have to, Lex. I’m not sure how much more I can take.” My whole body tensed at her admission, and I pulled her hand hard, trying to pull her through the metal squares that separated us.
“Why do I feel like this?” I finally asked, and a small smile played on Faylinn’s lips.
“You’ve never heard of Blood Magic, have you?” she whispered, and I shook my head. Faylinn opened her eyes in time to see my answer.
She hummed.
“I thought not. It actually seems like most of the people here don’t know anything about Blood Magic.” The last thought was more said to herself, and I waited to hear her explanation.
“My little village. In the north?” she started, and I nodded my head to show I was listening.
“We’re so close to the Ice Shelf. To the Northwoods.
We put more stock in the old religion and more natural magics than our affinities.
It’s nearly impossible for a little, remote fishing village to obtain the necessary crystals for their Mage population, so our people use their abilities sparingly.
Instead, we use runes for things. Instead of an Earth Mage and Water Mage creating a small tributary of a river for crops, we use runes and blood to redirect the river for a time.
Or instead of using an Air Shield, we inscribe a personal Protection Rune on our body.
” Faylinn released my hand to rub at a faded mark on her left forearm.
“That is a Protection Rune?” I asked in awe.
She nodded and sighed before dropping her arm.
“It was. It wore off before I got here. It’s why they’re able to do what they do to me. If I had this activated, they wouldn’t be able to touch me.”
“So activate it again,” I practically growled at her, and Faylinn giggled quietly, her breath fanning across my face.
“It’s not that simple, Lex.”
I grunted.
It should be that simple.
“That doesn’t explain why I suddenly feel this . . . need to be near you. On top of you,” I growled.
Faylinn sighed again.
“Yes, I know. Blood is magic, Lex, in its most primal and ancient form. It’s where wisps of power reside, where our affinity and affiliation originate from.
Blood is powerful. And you”—she paused for a moment to stroke my face with her hand through the bars—“gave me some of yours. Willingly, I might add.”
“So what does that have to do with anything? I’d do it again,” I said, her touch soothing something in my chest.
“I know. And that’s why you’re feeling the pull that you do.
Part of you, part of your magic, is currently inside of me.
Fueling me. Keeping me alive. It’s natural that you would want to be close to it.
It’s not a me thing, it’s a magic thing.
A blood thing.” She never paused her stroking as she matter-of-factly delivered the explanation.
“It’s a you thing,” I grumbled, and Faylinn laughed quietly again.
“Okay, caveman.”
I blew my breath onto her face and, this time, she full-on laughed.
The men in and women in the cells next to us groaned and grunted, but I gave less than two shits. Hours ago, I wasn’t sure I’d ever hear that sound again.
I smiled to myself while Faylinn traced my lips with her finger, and I involuntarily kissed them, happy to have her near.
“You’re very touchy-feely,” she mused, amusement lacing every word.
I shrugged my shoulders.
“I’m supposed to have a Pleasure affinity. What do you expect?” I joked, and Faylinn hummed.
“Lex.” She stopped stroking my face, suddenly serious. I opened my eyes and was immediately sucked into her hazel gaze, so intense and focused on my own brown eyes. “You have to be careful about who you give your blood to.”
I nodded my head.
“I’m serious. It can be used to . . . control. It can be extremely dangerous, and I need you to stay safe,” she whispered.
I forced as much seriousness into my face as I could as I reached through the bars to stroke Faylinn’s face.
“I promise,” I whispered. She visibly relaxed at my words, her shoulders sagging in relief as she turned her face to kiss my palm. “Go to bed, lover boy. I have a feeling tomorrow is going to be a rough day.”
With that, she lay her head down and closed her eyes, her breath evening out soon after.
Despite my exhaustion, I stayed awake, simply content to watch her sleep. To see her alive. Slowly, the possession in my chest faded to a dull ache, and I felt my limbs grow heavy.
We slept like that—bodies pressed together, the metal warming between us from our heat, with my hand on her cheek and hers on my chest.