Chapter 4 #2
“I get jealous easily, which is uncomfortable. If I’m not around him, I’m thinking about him. And I want to touch him all the time.” I wince. “And it gets kind of weird.”
“What does?” she whispers, intrigued.
How do I even say this? “I suddenly have this desire to start a family with him. He mentioned children earlier, and I felt…”
Nadine bites back a smile. “Sparkly?”
I groan, embarrassed.
“Come on, Kit. You’re twenty-six years old, and that man is gorgeous. Any normal woman in your position would think warm thoughts if he mentioned babies.”
I rub my forehead. “Having this conversation is also weird.”
“Remember Celia?” Nadine finishes her tea and sets the mug on the counter. “She swore she was a lone wolf, didn’t want kids at all, and then she and Dan bonded, and all she could think about was cubs. I don’t know much about shifter magic, but I know that this is pretty standard.”
“But we’re not actually shifters,” I argue. “Our magic is only mimicking that bond.”
She frowns. “It’s so bizarre.”
“Yeah.”
“You know, if you’re feeling all that because of the bond, then Rowan is also getting jealous easily, thinking about you when you’re not around, and wants to touch you all the time too.”
“It’s likely.”
“And he wants you to mother his gorgeous mage children.”
I nod, feeling my cheeks go pink.
“Sign me up. How do I find a hot mage to bond with?”
“Finding a hot mage in Moss Hollow isn’t the difficult part of the equation.”
Nadine taps her fingertips together like a greedy raccoon. “I love this place.”
“Good. Move here and work at the tea shop. At the beginning of August, I’m going to lose my help.”
She glances toward the living room, instantly concerned. “Why?”
I sigh, feeling a little gloomy. “Rowan needs to go back to Mablemyer to finish his degree. His old professor got him a job as an aide in exchange for free tuition. He said he’s not going to accept it…but he can’t afford to pay, so he kind of has to.”
“What about the bond? Will you be able to handle a long-distance relationship when you need to touch him all the time?”
I move the salt and pepper shakers to their spot on the table. “He’s trying to figure out how to break the bond.”
“What?” she gasps even though she’s only been invested in our fated relationship for five minutes. “Why would he do that?”
“He says it’s not fair to me. He feels like he's trapped me in a relationship.”
“Who cares? Has he ever looked in a mirror? You won the mate lottery.”
“That’s basically what I told him.”
“So, he thinks the bond is making you like him? That your feelings aren’t your own?”
“That’s pretty much it.”
Her eyes become soft and sad. “Does that mean we don’t know if he really likes you?”
“He claims he liked me before we bonded.”
She clutches her hands to her chest. “He fell in love with you while he was an owl? That’s so romantic.”
I laugh, in a strange, melancholy sort of mood.
“Don’t worry, Kit,” she assures me, infusing her autumn gifts into the words. “It’ll work out—I’m sure of it.”
The calming, peaceful magic affects me, making me want to believe her. But the encouragement feels slightly empty, based on nothing but blind optimism.
We don’t really know that it will work out. Rowan might break the bond, realize he was never in love with me, and go running back to Keira with apologies and open arms.
Thanks to Nadine’s magic affecting me, I feel resigned to that possible fate. I accept that it might be in our future. But I’m not happy about it, and her magic can’t artificially bring me joy.
But I probably shouldn’t dwell on the worst-case scenarios or I’ll start a summer storm. “We should get back in there so he doesn’t feel like I deserted him.”
Suddenly interested in her cup, Nadine asks, “Were you serious about me working for you?”
I perk up. “Do you want to?”
“Maybe. I’ve felt a little unmoored these last few months, like I don’t know where I belong.”
“You don’t like the gift shop anymore?”
We both started working at the ocean-side tourist store when we were in high school. It’s owned by a nice wolf shifter couple that treated their employees like family.
“The Wilsons closed the shop last week,” she says. “They decided to move to Montana with Nathan’s parents.”
“They’re closing?” I exclaim. “For good? But the shop has been around since we were kids.”
Nadine runs her finger over the rim of her mug. “I know.”
“I can’t imagine home without River Run Gifts.”
“I can’t either. And you know Mom and Dad have been talking about moving to Oregon to be closer to Kaylyn. Washington doesn’t really feel like home anymore, especially now that you’ve left.”
“How long are you planning to stay here?”
“I don’t know. I don’t have to be back anytime in particular, and I’m doing okay financially. I squirreled away quite a bit of money into my savings.”
Wish I could say the same.
“Why don’t you just stay here for a few months—get to know Moss Hollow and hang out at the tea shop? You know, see how you like it?”
“You’re sure?”
“Absolutely. Then you can decide if you want to work for me after Rowan leaves.”
Talking about him going back to college makes me feel despondent again. I don’t like it. The bond doesn’t like it, either.
Yes, I’d love to have Nadine here, but why can’t I have both? Maybe that’s greedy, though.
Nadine’s expression softens with pity. “Let’s get back out there, huh?”
“Yeah.”
When we step into the living room, I find Rowan standing next to the couch as though he’s trying to make his escape.
“Kit,” he says, looking relieved that I’m back. “I need to get going.”
“I’ll walk you out.”
“We’ll see you in the morning?” Dad asks. “You said you’ll give us a ride to the tea shop, correct?”
“Yes, sir.”
Rowan says his goodbyes, and then we step into the pleasant summer night. The earthy, green smell of the surrounding forest permeates the air, along with campfire smoke and the fragrance of all the cottage flowers growing with wild abandon in my garden.
The moon is nearly full, but hazy clouds pass over it, blocking its light.
Rowan takes a deep breath, looking stressed.
“Sorry you got trapped here,” I say as we round the cottage and head toward the old garden.
“I didn’t make the best first impression.”
“You were kind and polite—that’s all my parents really care about. I’m sure they loved you.”
“I suspect they don’t like that I’m a mage, and your father isn’t happy that I lived here with you.”
“I’m a grown woman, and you were an owl at the time. He’ll get over it.”
He manages a wry smile. “And the mage part?”
“That might take some time, but it will be fine—I promise. My parents are kind and welcoming pixies. Our relationship might have startled them, but I’m sure they won’t hold your heritage against you.”
Not believing me, Rowan groans. “I should go. I’ll see you tomorrow.”
The bond protests, urging me to wrap my arms around his middle and forbid him from leaving. At least, I think it’s the bond. Maybe I just don’t want him to go.
Rowan pauses. “I can’t make out your expression in the dark, but your magic is absent, so I know you’re not happy.”
“I’m not unhappy. I just…”
A moment later, light blooms between us.
Rowan holds his wand, commanding the illumination spell. He lifts his brows, smiling. “Do you need a hug?”
I laugh, shaking my head, denying how truly needy I am.
But when he beckons me forward, I step in without hesitation. Holding me with one arm, he lets the light spell drop and slides his wand into his waistband.
I sigh as he wraps both arms around my back and holds me close. We’re alone, with only the starlight for company, in the shadows of my overgrown garden.
The night air is cool, and Rowan is warm and solid. I breathe in his familiar scent and close my eyes, wishing we had more than a few stolen moments.
“I should go,” he finally says, the words spoken close to my ear.
“Okay.” I cling to him for a few more seconds and then reluctantly step back.
“I’ll see you tomorrow.” He leans down and brushes a kiss over my forehead.
“All right.”
He pauses briefly and then leans in again, kissing the tip of my nose this time.
I smile at this rare glimpse of his playful side.
“Well…” In the dim moonlight, his eyes move to my mouth. “Good night.”
The bond crackles between us, coaxing us closer. I tilt my face up, giving him permission.
Rowan’s lips touch mine briefly, lingering for no more than a second. Just a peck. He pulls back, his eyes searching mine in the light of my sparkles.
Feeling bold, I stand on my tiptoes, place my hand on his chest to steady myself, and return the kiss with a whisper-soft one of my own. “Night.”
We stare at each other for several heartbeats. Against my palm, Rowan’s chest moves faster with each breath he takes.
Please.
Please.
Finally, he groans out a mild curse, cups the back of my head with his big, warm hand, and claims my mouth like he owns it.