Chapter 35
A za doesn’t expect so many people in one room. She thought this would be a private conversation. Was something wrong? Was their plan already falling apart?
“Princess Amiaza, welcome! I apologize, we were just finishing up a quick meeting over breakfast. You are all dismissed, thank you.”
Aza exhales, moving to her seat at the table. Zhou sits across from her. Servants clear the table quickly.
“My son and I had a discussion this morning. He would like to officially offer you his hand in marriage, and in return, we will solidify everything we discussed yesterday. All I need is your word, dear, that you want to marry my son, and I will send this newly drafted letter to your father.”
“I want to marry your son, your majesty.”
“Excellent! This is the most splendid news! I will have this letter sent out immediately. You two, please enjoy breakfast!” The King beams with excitement before bowing and leaving the room, the letter clenched tightly in his hand.
Aza and Zhou both stand up at the same time, meeting at the end of the table and pulling each other into a tight embrace.
“Did that really just happen?”
Zhou takes her hand and twirls her around, “Yes, my future fake wife and partner in crime!” Aza smacks him gently on the arm, “Dance with me?”
“Dance with you?”
“Yes, we are celebrating, and we have to seem like we’re madly in love at this ball when you announce our engagement.”
“We still have to wait for my father’s approval.”
“How could he deny such a lucrative deal and me?” He flaunts and then tells her, “Girl, we need to work on you being more optimistic.”
Aza chuckles. Zhou pulls her into a slow sway. Aza smiled, rested her head on his shoulder, and let him continue to hold and move her in this moment. She tries to keep her mind from wandering and appreciates this moment, this win. She will tell Jahar tonight. All would be well.
When Aza goes to find Jahar, she runs into Colby, who says that Jahar had left earlier, saying he needed to get some fresh air. Aza asked him, the next time he saw him, to tell Jahar she needed to speak to him and that she would be waiting in her room. So Zhou and her made their way back there.
“How or what are you going to tell him?”
“I’m going to tell him everything—that we found a way to fulfill my duty and still be together.”
“Tonight needs to be the night.”
“Yeah, I know. I already said I was telling him tonight.”
“No, silly. I mean tonight is the night” he puts an emphasis on ‘the.’
“Oh my heavens! No. H-he won’t. I… I don’t know if we’re ready, if I’m ready.”
“Don’t let fear control you. You want this. You’ve wanted him. Stop holding yourself back. And I’m going to get you that tea and bring candles, flowers, whatever I can find to make this room romantic."
“Wait! But, Zhou?”
“No ma’am. No buts. No refunds. Trust me.” And with that, he leaves.
They spend nearly an hour filling the room with candles, flowers, and scattered petals. Zhou raids the kitchens. Fruit, chocolate, whipped cream, anything he can carry. Zhou even somehow convinced Aza’s guards to take the night off and have his guards man her door, which was not an easy feat.
“What if he doesn’t come? What if he’s really sick or really upset with me?”
“He will come.I took the liberty of sliding a note under his door, saying you needed to speak to him, it was important. Just trust and breathe.” He shows her the motion, then looks her over, lip curling.
“Is that what you’re wearing? No. Get in the bathing room and fix yourself.
I’ll find you appropriately inappropriate lingerie and a dress that’ll make him buckle.
And if he comes before I get back, just walk out here naked. He’ll listen.” He takes off once again.
By the time Aza is done washing, styling her hair, and adding a bit of color to her face, Zhou had somehow snuck in and left behind a gorgeous dress and the most see-through undergarments she had ever seen. Next to them was a note.
You got this, beautiful! I made myself scarce. Word is he’s returning to his bedroom now, so you’ve got less than half an hour to get your butt around. Good luck!
Love, Zhou
Although his letter and his efforts brought a smile to her face, the panic began to set in. She didn’t know how he would react. What if, after all this, he still didn’t want to be with her? What if it didn’t work out?
She could hear Zhou’s voice in her head telling her everything would be alright, and her nerves simmered down slightly.
She regained her focus and began putting on what lay on the bed.
The lingerie fit her body perfectly, but they left little to the imagination.
The lace is thin—sheer enough to leave little hidden.
She can see everything, but she doesn’t second-guess it.
The dress is a shiny black with ultra-thin straps.
It hugs every curve of her body, accentuating her breasts, her hips, her butt, and thighs.
She’s never felt so naked but powerful in a dress before.
She adjusts everything into the right places, makes sure her bed is cleared off, and pops her head up when she hears the doorknob turn.
She begins walking out of her bedchambers and sees Jahar enter the door to her right. His head is down at first as he shuts the door behind him, but when he looks up, utter shock defines his face as he sees Aza standing there in her dress.
“I… I’m sorry. I-I didn’t mean to interrupt. I got your note, but I must be too late. I’ll go.” His voice is low, disappointed.
Aza reaches for him, “No. Stay.”
“I’m clearly interrupting something. I should go.”
“Jaharis Almasir. I told you to stay.” She says in a commanding voice.
Aza can see his throat move as he swallows hard.
She notices the tension in his body, the strain in his pants.
What are you hiding from me, Jahar?
“What is it, Princess?”
“I need to talk to you about something.”
“Right. So why all the candles, and you in a dress looking…” he neglects to finish his sentence.
“Looking what?” She asked as she stalked towards him.
“What’s going on?” He asks, stepping back.
“I’m going to marry Zhou.”
A mix of shock and anger flashes across his face before he spits, “Well, that was fast,” Jahar mutters.
“What does that mean?” Aza asks, offended.
“Nothing.”
“No, speak your truth, Jahar.”
“You’ve known him for three days, you claim to have been in love with me for three years, but you are already ready to switch up and marry him?” Jahar is spewing anger at this point, “And what’s going on here? Planning to sleep with him again, just a little less drunk this time?”
“How dare you! I have been in love with you for three years, but don’t forget that you told me only a few days ago that we could never be together and that I needed to move on. We could only be friends and had to choose other people. So, what? Are you switching up now, too?”
“This is exactly why I told you I couldn’t handle it.
I don’t want to see you with another man.
I don’t want to think about what happened last night or what is going to happen tonight.
I’m going to lose my fucking mind!” Jahar bellows, “I have hated every second of seeing him touch your hand, or hug you, or make you laugh. It physically hurts. It makes me so incredibly nauseous that I haven’t eaten in days.
I know I told you on the ship we could stay just friends, but I just couldn’t stand the thought of losing you.
I can’t just be your friend! I thought I could learn to handle it. I cannot.”
Aza cannot believe the words coming from him. She didn’t realize the agony he had also been going through. He had hidden it so well for so long that they had only started to scratch the surface.
“He's gay.” Aza blurts out.
“What?”
“He doesn’t want to be with me. Not like that.
What we have is different. We connect, we understand each other, but he doesn’t want me that way.
He’s been in love with his advisor for years.
If I marry him, it’s only for show. A glimpse of a king and queen, nothing more.
No expectations. No intimacy. But I can’t keep pretending.
” She exhales, steadying herself. “I love you, Jahar. I’ve loved you from the beginning.
I tried to accept that we couldn’t be together, but I can’t.
Not anymore. I don’t want to live without knowing what it’s like to be with you.
I’ve found a way for us to be together, without forcing anything on you. Please… just tell me you want me too.”
“What if we get caught? You could be disgraced. I could be killed for it.”
“Zhou is going to be king; he has agreed to this plan.”
“What if his father decides that he can still make decisions and have me killed, or your father wants me killed. I’ll break his trust!”
“Do you fear death?” Aza asks.
He pauses. Aza can see in his eyes that he’s contemplating before answering, "No, no, I don't. But I fear being without you, I fear what leaving you might do. I fear leaving you alone and not being able to protect you."
"Then if you die, I die." Aza states, full of conviction.
"No! I don't want you to die.”
"I don’t want to die either. But living without you would be worse.
If we’re caught and you have to die, then I’ll die beside you.
I’ll find you. Heaven or hell, the next life, wherever you go.
Your soul is tied to mine,” Aza says, her voice cracking.
“Please… listen to your heart. Take me as I am.”
Aza can see the last shred of his resolve disappear as he lunges across the room for her.
Picking her up into his arms, slipping her dress up so she can wrap her legs around him.
Aza’s heart skips a beat and begins fluttering nearly out of her chest. One hand continues to grip under her thigh, while the other cradles the back of her head.
Their lips crash together, Jahar warm and sweet against her. A moan slips from Aza as he deepens the kiss, pressing closer, his rhythm quickening. His tongue brushes hers, and her lips part without hesitation, letting him in.
Aza tugs on his hair, squishing his face even closer into hers. She feels as if she might suffocate, but she would gladly give up all her air to stay with him like this. But, clearly running out of air himself, Jahar parts from her lips briefly, laying his forehead against hers.
“I love you, Aza. I’ve loved you for years, and I’ll love you for every one I have left.
I’m sorry it wasn’t easy for us, but thank you for finding a way.
Thank you for choosing me. I’ll cherish you every day, take care of you however you need, and stand beside you through everything.
There’s nothing I wouldn’t face for you.
I’m only sorry it took me so long to admit it. ”
Aza holds his face between her hands, “You are my light in the darkness. You are the reason I have the strength to get up every morning. You encourage me to not give up, and you help me when I fall. You are my rock, my safety, my heart, my soul, every part of me unequivocally belongs to you. I love you, Jahar.” Aza confesses, staring into Jahar’s sparkling eyes.
His lips once again devour Aza’s. He brings them to the bedroom, laying Aza on the bed, but never breaking their kiss. Aza just knows this time, they won’t be stopping.