Chapter Twenty-five
Emma
I turn the key in my door and the lock clicks. The door swings open, and I step into the quiet of my apartment.
It swallows me whole.
There’s just me... and the silence.
“I guess that’s that,” I say to the walls, but they don’t respond. Memories fill my mind, his laughter—a rich, warm sound that makes me smile.
I drop my keys on the counter, the clatter loud in the stillness. I half expect Lila to call out from the couch, teasing me about being jumpy. But there”s nothing. Not her, not Kade. No Kade leaning against the doorway with that smirk, the one that says he knows exactly how to unsettle me.
“I need to stop thinking about him,” I whisper, hugging myself tight.
Now I’m alone.
“I should”ve known better than to trust either of them,” I say to the room. To them. To myself.
But there”s just a gaping hole in my chest, a pain where they should be.
I pace the length of my living room. The confrontation with Kade and Alex replays in my head, sharp as shards of glass that slice me to the bone. I see myself turning away from them, feel the sting of tears that threatened but never fell as I left the club. The club that might go under, thanks to Alex. What had he done?
My fingers trace the back of the sofa where Kade and I snuggled, and I can see him in my mind’s eye, his arm thrown over the backrest, dark eyes following me with a mix of challenge and amusement. I exhale, feeling pain lancing through my center.
“Emma Riley, pull it together.” It”s not just anger that knots in my stomach; it”s longing, too. For his teasing voice, his infuriating grin, the heat that radiated from him whenever we talked. I thought we had a future and now I don’t know.
“Damn you, Kade.” I collapse onto the couch, burying my face in my hands.
Tears sting in my eyes, and they wet my palms and fingers. Curling into myself, I pull my knees to my chest, sinking into the comfort of my couch. But there’s no comfort now. Just an ache I want to get rid of.
The apartment feels too big, the silence too loud. I dig out my markers and my mini canvases. And I focus on lines, on creating a cat face with an expression that matches my mood exactly. As I detail the image, I can’t help but be a smart ass and write, still alive, unfortunately on the front of the image. But the humor doesn”t make me smile.
I put things away, then walk back to sit on the floor, knees pulled up, staring at the rain sliding down the balcony doors. I remember that rainy night spent together, how safe and warm I felt. I’d never have believed in a million years that all of this would have fallen apart so spectacularly.
And something that flashed between the men fills my mind. Alex had trapped Kade into secrecy... and he’d misled Kade, too. Kade was trapped, caught in the impossible decision between love and friendship.
I lie down on my back and stare up at the ceiling, the weight of this understanding pressing down on me. How many times had I seen him hesitate, the words he wanted to say lodged in his throat because they were at odds with the loyalty he owed my brother?
“Gosh, what a mess.” I breathe out, the fight draining from me. My anger toward Kade fades, replaced by a reluctant empathy. He loved Alex like a brother, but he was falling for me. How could he choose? Would I have been able to?
I toss restlessly on my bed, the sheets cold, but not the good kind of cold. I roll over and stare at the window, the anger within me lessoning to a sad resignation. Alex lied because he loves me. Can I fault him for trying to shield me from pain?
“Damn you both. And damn me for loving you two.” The words are chased by more tears and my head aches. Sure, I”m mad at Alex, but love doesn”t just vanish in the presence of anger.
One day fades into the next, passing me by, though I have no idea how many have come and gone. I try to lose myself in books, in music—anything to drown out the memories of dancing with him in my living room.
And when it’s time to sleep again, I lie on the couch under my fuzzy blanket. “Maybe tomorrow,” I tell myself. “Maybe tomorrow I”ll feel okay.”
I run my hand along the back of the couch, fingers brushing something unexpected. It”s a card—a Cards Against Humanity card. I pull it out, a laugh escaping before it chokes in my throat. Kade”s wicked sense of humor flashes through my memory, his infectious laughter filling the now silent room.
I sink into the cushions, gripping the fluffy blanket around me.
But I can’t sleep, so I get up and decide to do something productive; clean out my kitchen junk drawer. My fingers graze over forgotten trinkets, ticket stubs, and tangled jewelry. But then they stop, catching on the edge of something solid. I pick it up and realize it’s a frame. A frame with a photograph in it.
It”s us—Kade, Alex, and me—as teens. We”re sprawled on the front lawn, summer sun casting halos in our hair. Kade”s smile is wide, but that devilish glint in his eyes was there, even then. Alex looks protective even as he laughs at something off-camera - I don”t remember what.
“Look at us,” I whisper, tracing the outline of our younger selves. The smiles are real, unfiltered by recent complications. I place the frame on the counter, stepping back as if distance can lend perspective. It can”t.
I reach for my phone. I need to face this head-on or it’ll leave me hurting for a very long time.
But I’m not ready. So I set my phone down and grab a notebook, the spine cracked from frequent use, and flip it open to a blank page. The pen in my hand feels heavy, loaded with the weight of what I”m about to do.
Rule one:Honesty, even when it hurts.
Rule two: Trust is a two-way street.
Rule three:my hand finally steadies. We’re a team, equals.
The list grows, each rule set to give us a better future. A future where love is our sanctuary instead of a series of half-truths and hidden loyalties.
“Emma?” His voice comes through the door, hesitant yet hopeful, and my heart does a somersault. Kade’s at my door, right now. “Emma, can we talk?” he asks.
I glance at my notebook, making up my mind. “Only if you”re ready to hear my new rules,” I say.
“Let’s hear it,” he says.
“Hey,” Kade says when I open the door, and just like that, he”s here—in my space, bringing back memories of us that flood my senses. He looks nervous, shifting his weight from foot to foot.
“Hi,” I say, stepping aside to let him in.
But instead of the rules, I pull him inside and into a hug, needing his touch, his comfort. I reach up, threading my fingers through his hair, pulling him down to meet my kiss.
“I wasn’t sure you’d let me in,” he says against my lips.
“Neither was I,” I whisper. “But here we are.”
“Yeah.” He exhales, the air cooling my damp lips. “Here we are.”
“I”ve been thinking—”
“Me, too,” he says quickly, like he”s afraid of losing his chance to speak. “A lot.”
“About us?” I ask.
“Always about us.” He smiles as if he can’t imagine anything else, his dark eyes intense on mine as I pull out of his embrace and make my way to the couch. He closes the door behind us and follows.
“Kade, I... I want to move forward.”
His eyebrows rise as if that’s the last thing he expected me to say. “Really?”
I nod. “But things have to change.”
“The new rules,” he says in a tone that confirms he understands.
The air in my apartment feels different now—heavy with the possibility that Kade and I might mend what”s broken between us.
“No secrets. No lies,” I whisper.
He nods. “You have my word, Emma. No secrets, no lies.”
“Okay,” I say. “Let”s start there.”
“Start... with honesty?” He seems almost confused, but I’m curious where he’s about to take this.
I nod as his cologne, familiar and intoxicating, washes over me.
“Emma,” he says, “I”m falling for you. Hard.”
I blink. That wasn’t the honesty I expected, but it’s certainly honest.
“Kade,” I whisper, my heart skipping a beat. “We have a lot to work through.”
“I know.” He reaches out, his hand touching mine. “But I want to. For you, for us. I”m all in.”
“Me, too.” Relief floods through me in waves, warm and soothing. His promise sounds like truth, like something solid I can hold onto.
And we dive into conversation, really talk for the first time since everything fell apart. I tell him about the empty days, how they”ve been filled with reminders of him. He listens, his responses not just empty words but genuine understanding.
“Emma, I”ve been lost without you,” he says with a delicate smile, and I can picture the furrow between his brows, the way he runs a hand through his hair when he”s frustrated or sad.
“Are we okay?” he asks.
“I want us to be,” I say, because despite the hurt, the love is still there.
“Me, too,” he says, and something shifts in the space between us.
“Alex lied to me, too,” he says quietly, and the hurt in his voice tugs at something deep in me. “He wanted to invest in some risky business... a loan shark. Said you”d be against it and told me not to tell you.”
I blink. “That”s true, I would”ve objected. Strongly.”
Kade leans toward me, bridging the gap between us. “I get why he did it, but keeping you in the dark... it wasn”t right. And it was heavy.” His shoulders seem lighter now, a physical representation of the truth in his words.
A sigh escapes me. “It wasn’t right,” I say, agreeing with him. ”We can”t change the past, but there’s hope for a future.”
Our hands inch closer to one another, and his fingers brush mine.
“Let’s do this right,” I whisper, meeting his gaze.
“Let’s do this together.”
And as our fingers tangle, the world falls away, leaving nothing but us. His touch sends currents up my arm, warming me from the inside out.
I knock on Alex”s door, my heart hammering against my ribcage. It swings open, and there he stands—my brother, yet he feels like a stranger today.
“Em? What are you doing here?” His question is filled with surprise and guilt.
“Can we talk?”
“Of course.” He steps aside, allowing me space to enter the familiar territory of his apartment.
I take a deep breath as I cross the threshold, steeling myself to confront my brother. “Alex, why did you lie to Kade?”
He runs his hands down his face, betraying his stress. “Emma, I thought I was protecting you and doing the right thing.”
“By lying?”
“By keeping you out of it. I didn”t want you involved in the mess with the loan shark.” His genuine tone has my heart softening.
“Kade told me everything,” I say, “You made him believe that you wanted to invest and asked him not to tell me because I’d object. It’s my club, too. You had no right to go behind my back and make those kinds of decisions.”
Alex sighs, the heavy sound filled with regret. “I know, I know. It was stupid.”
“Beyond stupid, Alex. It nearly cost me my relationship with Kade. You put him in an impossible position.”
His brows lift. “I had no idea you two were... were...” He can’t seem to finish the thought.
“That’s fair,” I say. “I kept secrets from you, too. I was afraid you’d hate me.”
His brows furrow and he pulls me into a hug. “Hate you? For what? For falling in love with a damn good guy? I’m ecstatic!”
I breathe a sigh of relief. “I won’t lie to you anymore, Alex. I need you to promise the same. No more lies or secrets, okay?”
“Agreed,” he says.
“Promise?” I ask.
“Promise.”
“Are you okay with Kade and me-”
He holds up both hands, releasing me and mocking surrender. “I don’t need any details.”
I laugh.
“You both have my blessing. And I”ll do whatever it takes to support you both. You deserve happiness, Em.”
“Thank you.” The words nearly strangle me, but I’ve never been so happy. “That means everything to me.”