Chapter Twelve
Jake
‘Push it, Walsh, come on. Punch it, let’s go.’
Saturday, at the training center, after practice without pads, we’re supposed to be doing gentle workouts on arms, chest, back and shoulders ahead of Monday night’s opener.
Lying on my back with my knees bent, my biceps tremble as I lift the barbell bar.
Ordinarily, three fifty pounds would not be an issue for me, but today I’m fighting it.
Maybe it’s lack of sleep. Who the hell could sleep after a kiss like that?
Fuck.
Rodrigo, one of the Mutineers’ training staff, supports me at the last second, helping me lift the bar onto the stand either side of my head. I pull myself up.
‘I need a minute.’ I wince, exhaling, out of breath.
‘S’up with you today?’
I massage my right shoulder. ‘Not feelin’ it.’
‘Sore?’
‘Naw. Just. Can’t focus.’
‘Take a moment.’
I get to my feet, sling my towel round my neck. Sweat drips from my chin. All around me in the gym, my teammates are concentrating on their final preparations before tomorrow’s rest day. Because the season is about to start proper, and their sole focus is on that. The game. The win.
That’s where my focus should be. But it’s not. I’m focused on Serenity Harper. Anything else in my brain gets pushed out by her. Her smell. The taste of her. The way she moaned against my mouth when I kissed her.
I know I should say it was just a kiss. That I need to conquer this. But that kiss rocked my world. That kiss was sent from heaven. I’ve never had a kiss that blew my mind before. That I was so into. That left me wanting so much more.
She says she doesn’t want me. Or that she can’t have me. Or that I can’t have her. But if that’s true, how come she kissed me back like that?
I can’t not have her. I can’t just leave it. I need to see her again.
Yet, like Cinderella, she went racing out into the night. And it took every fiber in my body to let her go.
I can’t let her go again.
‘Walsh!’
My eyes snap up. Coach Holland is glaring at me. ‘Fuck you doing just standing there?’
‘Just need a minute, Coach.’
‘You’ve had a minute! Get back to the workout!’
‘Uh… sure, Coach.’
As the training session comes to an end, I hang back, putting in some extra minutes, hoping that the more I work out, the less I’ll think about her.
I’m last to hit the showers in the locker room, wet towels everywhere, most of the guys heading off for some family time, steam swirling about the place.
My teammates bid me goodbye as they leave.
I take a seat on the bench by my locker, a towel around my waist and stare at the floor.
‘S’up, rookie?’ I hear a gruff voice say, and Hud Briar is standing there, naked as the day he was born, his rock-hard body and bulging quads on show, all his tattoos and his impressive dick just hanging out for all to see.
I don’t know how long I’ve been sitting here, staring at nothing, trying to figure out my next move.
‘Looks like you got somethin’ on your mind,’ he says as he turns. I note he’s got a mirror hanging in his locker. He’s grown a beard these last few weeks and is really into his personal grooming.
‘Somethin’ botherin’ you?’ he asks.
If anyone knows how I might feel right now, it’s him.
I watch the last of my teammates depart, bidding us farewell. We’ll see one another again tomorrow night at the hotel venue in time for curfew. It’s just the two of us left. ‘Let’s say I met a woman…’ I begin, and in his mirror, I think I see him smirk.
He shakes his head. ‘I knew it. Guy only looks that miserable when there’s a woman involved. What’s the issue? It’s not Lemon Conway, is it?’
‘No, it’s not Lemon. Though I do have to take her out tonight, by order of her mother.’
He sucks his teeth. ‘Good luck with that. Back to the other lady. What’s the deal?’
‘She’s not… technically, she’s not available.’
His expression grows more serious. ‘She’s not a cheerleader, is she? Don’t go there, man. That way misery lies, my friend. Believe me, I speak from experience.’
I try not to react. I’m not planning on sharing that information with anyone, even River. ‘What happened with Harmony after the wedding? Anything?’
He pulls on a pair of underwear and adjusts himself. ‘She reminded me why I should be out there tryna bag me a hottie and wife her up.’
I look at him. He hangs his head.
‘Have you guys ever… gotten physical?’
‘This ain’t the tenth grade, Walsh. You can ask if I ever had sex with her.’
‘Have you?’
He looks to the side. I see a muscle flinch in his jaw. He puts his hands on his hips. ‘I fucking wish,’ he sighs. ‘Can’t get past second base, despite my best efforts. This is the longest dry spell of my entire life. My dick thinks my hand is a pussy. And, like a fuckin’ idiot… I can’t move on.’
‘Why not?’
He pinches his nose, shakes his head. ‘You know, that fucking Erasmus dude was right. Can’t live with women. Can’t live without ’em.’
‘I don’t know how you do it.’
‘Shit, I don’t either. I don’t know when Harmony Reese set up camp in my brain.
Somewhere along the line, she claimed permanent residency.
But she’s also a loyal slave to the CMC and Kathleen Motherfucking Lafferty and her motherfucking rules.
’ His voice goes quiet and he turns back to his locker.
‘And now I’m a motherfucking slave to her,’ he mutters.
‘Look, whoever she is, man, I recommend you extricate yourself now, before it’s too late.
Before you’d do anything for her, just to have her smile at you. ’
I’m pretty sure I’m past that point already.
‘You think I should cut ties?’ I ask.
‘Find somebody available. No controversy. Hey, maybe Lemon’ll turn out to be a real nice girl.’
Why do people keep on saying that?
‘If there’s another guy involved, try and talk her into breakin’ up with him.
Don’t be a cheat, man, that’s not the answer either.
If you’re the one for her, she’ll choose you.
But women, they like to be pursued, you know?
They like to feel like you’re working for their attention. That they’re desired.’
I raise my brow. I’ve been in what I thought were two serious relationships and nothing like that ever occurred to me. ‘You think that’s true?’
Hud is almost dressed. I’m still in my towel. ‘Hell, yeah, it’s true,’ he says, pocketing his key chain. ‘I saw the number of hoops my brother had to jump through just to get on a date with his wife, Ally. You put in the effort, she’ll follow through, alright. If she’s into you.’
‘So… you think I shouldn’t let it go?’
Hudson closes his locker with a bang. ‘Okay, this conversation just got way too cryptic for me. I say if you like her, go get her.’ He picks up his bag, holds up one finger.
‘Except if she’s CMC. Those girls, I recommend you stay well clear.
Unless you wanna torture yourself for the next five years or whatever. I gotta go. Later, bruh.’
He puts on a pair of Ray-Bans and I bid Hudson farewell. Takes me a moment to realize that he gave completely conflicting advice. The locker room falls silent, save for the sound of water dripping from the showers.
I get dressed, but in my mind, I already know my answer.
CMC or not, there’s no way I’m letting Serenity go.
On my route home, I drive out my way to The Bounty and pull up in the parking lot.
I sit for a minute and watch through the windows.
I can’t see her. I leave the pickup and head for a copy shop on the other side of the road to purchase a pen, some paper and a bunch of envelopes.
If she’s not gonna give me her phone number, then I gotta go old school.
Once I’ve got everything, I go back to my vehicle, get on my phone and spend an hour doing some research.
When I’m happy everything’s set up, I reach for the pen and scribble out my note.
Takes me a few attempts until I’m happy.
The interior of the diner is quiet when I finally make it inside. I take a seat and watch as an older waitress brings me a menu.
‘I’ll just get a soda,’ I say.
‘That’s all?’ she asks.
‘That’s all.’
‘Sure,’ she says, keeping a hold on the menu as I order a Diet Coke with ice.
‘Is Serenity here today?’ I ask.
She shakes her head. ‘She was here earlier. She left already.’
‘Will you see her soon? You think you could give her something for me?’
She frowns. ‘Uh. Sure, I guess?’
I pull out a sealed envelope with Serenity’s name written on it and pass it to her. I think I see her lips twitch into a smile. I wait for my soda, and I can’t stop my knee from skipping up and down. In the parking lot, my expensive pickup stands out.
I can’t get away with coming here much longer.
When I get home, River’s in the den watching TV with her feet up.
‘You wanna go catch a movie or something?’ she asks once we’ve exchanged hellos.
‘Can’t. Gotta take Lemon Conway out to dinner. I gotta go in a half hour.’
She throws her head back and covers her eyes. ‘I forgot. You’re so darn nice. And not even a little bit dumb for agreeing to this. Why you going so early anyway?’
‘Told her I need my beauty sleep. Tomorrow night’s curfew at a hotel before Monday night’s opener.’
‘I guess no nightcap for Lemon then.’
I pull a face. ‘Like that was ever gonna happen.’
‘So why are you even taking her out then?’
I give a pronounced shrug. ‘When Samantha Conway asks you to do something… I guess you gotta go do it.’
River snorts. ‘That’s ridiculous. You know, she and Mom are like kindred spirits. Both tryna set you up on dates with girls you don’t wanna go out with.’
I rub my eyes. I see Serenity’s face staring back at me and hope she gets my note.
‘How about you call somebody and get them to go see a movie with you?’
It’s her turn to shrug. ‘Maybe I’ll ask Dad.’
‘I was thinking somebody your own age.’
She goes quiet and pulls a thread on her jersey.
‘There ain’t a girl from school you could go hang out with?’
‘Sure. Maybe.’
‘Did you make a friend yet?’