Chapter Sixteen
J ane
Jane strolled into the long-thatched yoga room overlooking the Pacific Ocean. Several people sat cross-legged practicing their breathing.
Patrick waved her over from his gray yoga mat. She sauntered his direction. The two of them had spent quite a bit of time together. They had shared many aspects of their lives over margaritas and sunsets, but she hadn’t told him about Brady. She hadn’t been ready to talk about him.
Patrick was a nice guy and into everything she enjoyed. Reading. Walks on the beach. Yoga. Meditation. Fresh, whole foods. And good-looking men. If he lived closer to her, they’d probably be besties.
“Hey,” she whispered, not wanting to interrupt anyone’s practice. She rolled out her teal yoga mat and squatted into a seat.
“Beautiful sunset.” He tipped his chin up to the purple, pink and orange melting into the horizon.
“I know. I don’t think I’ll ever get over this view.” She smiled softly.
“How are you feeling about the retreat ending?”
“Bittersweet.” She lifted her hand and waved it. “These last three weeks have been incredible. I’ve learned so much. Made some great friends.” She flashed him a grin. “But I’m ready to get home. I miss my family. My studio. My friends.” And Brady . His name hovered unspoken on her lips.
“I hear you.” He gave her a soft smile that reached his eyes. “It’s always great to get away, but there is nothing like going home.”
She nodded.
“Good evening,” Domenico said in a sing-song voice.
Those milling around the edges of the room found a spot and rolled out their mats.
Others who had already settled in and begun their breathing exercises slowly returned to the present, opening their eyes.
Jane and Patrick turned their focus to the front of the room, where their final evening meditation was about to begin.
“It’s our last evening together,” Domenico said gently.
“Before we begin, I want to thank each of you for being part of this journey. I’ve gotten to know all of you and am so grateful that you chose to share this experience with me.
I hope that it has brought you the healing or clarity, or both, you came looking for—and maybe even something unexpected. ”
She closed her eyes and exhaled slowly. The retreat had done exactly that. Her time here, her growing friendship with Patrick, had clarified so much. She sifted into a cross-legged seat, rested her hands on her knees and let her breath carry her into her final meditation of the retreat.
****
J ane sat on a blanket on the beach watching the moon cast a spotlight over the blackened ocean.
This retreat had been a great break at a time when she’d needed one.
She had to clear her head. She had to figure out what she wanted.
Three weeks of meditations and yoga practice had a way of centering her.
“Jane.” Patrick’s voice interrupted her thoughts.
She turned to see him crossing the sand, barefoot in brown linen pants and nothing else. The moonlight cast a silver sheen across his toned chest and shoulders. Though the calendar still claimed winter, the balmy air near the equator felt like summer.
“Hey.” She scooted over on the blanket to make room for him.
“I was packing up and saw you out here alone.” He lowered into a seat next to her, his toes sinking into the sand.
“I was just processing the last three weeks,” she murmured. And the rest of my life. But she didn’t need to admit that out loud.
He leaned back on his hands and looked up at the moon. “How’s that going?”
She gave a soft laugh. “It’s ... going. You know this retreat fell at exactly the right time for me.”
He shifted his gaze to her. “I know you mentioned that before but you never said why. Do you want to share?”
Patrick put her at ease and didn’t pressure her into anything.
He listened without judgment, at least, thus far.
She really hadn’t had anyone to talk to about her relationship with Brady.
Taylor knew but she hadn’t wanted to put him in a more complicated situation than he already was just knowing their secret.
And her few girlfriends would have given away her secret with their eyes every time Brady walked into a room.
Kerri and Giselle would lose their life savings at poker, if they played.
Maybe Patrick would be a good sounding board.
“I’m in love with someone back home but it’s complicated and was a tangled mess before I left.”
“Is he married?”
Her eyes widened. She hadn’t even thought her words would give him that idea. But she could see it now. “No.” She shook her head. “I’d never do that. He’s my brother’s best friend.”
“Ah. The ol’ brother’s best friend scenario.” He chuckled, shifting in the sand.
“I didn’t realize that was actually a thing outside of romance novels and my own life.” She grimaced.
“Romance novels, Lifetime movies, and apparently your love life.”
She swatted his arm with a laugh. “Gee, thanks. I’m a cliché.”
“Tell me about it.”
She exhaled, then poured her heart out about everything. Her years-long crush. Their unabashed flirting that blurred the lines. Her mastermind plan to seduce him on New Year’s Eve. The scorching sex. Brady’s maddening indecision. His promise to Rex. Her breaking point.
“Wow.” He fell back on the blanket.
“I know, right?” She leaned back on her elbows and stared up at the starry sky.
“What is it you want, Jane?” He rolled to his side and faced her.
“That’s an easy question for me.” She smiled. “But what I want and what he’s willing to give me are not the same.”
“You said he came from an abusive home and sees your brother like family—like the only real one he’s ever had. When someone with that kind of past forms a bond, they don’t take it lightly. They’ll protect it with everything they have.”
“You sound like Brady.”
“My history isn’t all sunshine and rainbows. I get why he’d want to protect what he has with your brother. Do you think Rex will be pissed?”
“Yes. At first.” She released a heavy sigh. “He’s always played the overprotective big brother card.”
“But wouldn’t he want his best friend and sister to be happy?”
“Of course. But I’m his baby sister and, well, Brady has a bit of a reputation.”
“Oh, so he was a player? And Rex doesn’t think he will do right by you?”
“Bingo.” She pointed at him. “It’s more that Rex thinks he’s incapable of commitment.”
“So he’d rather pigeonhole Brady as a player—someone not good enough for you—even though he’s his best friend and clearly makes you happy?” Patrick shook his head. “You two need to talk to your brother. He might be mad at first, but if he sees you’re both serious, he’ll probably come around to it.”
He sat up, brushing sand from his hands. “And if Brady messes it up? Then your brother has every right to kick his ass.”
“Brady doesn’t want to tell Rex. Not now. Maybe not ever.”
Patrick’s brow lifted. “Is it only Brady’s decision to make?”
Patrick left that question dangling in the air. She sat with it for a few minutes. She loved Brady. End of story. Her heart was all in. She wanted to spend her life with him. She knew he wanted that too.
“No. It’s not just up to him.” Her voice was calm. Steady. For the first time in weeks, her mind was clear.