Chapter Fifteen
Vivian had no idea what she was doing. In fact, she’d spent most of her time here in Africa wondering where her head had gone and why it wasn’t firmly screwed on her head. It wasn’t like her.
She had never fallen for anyone she shouldn’t have. Especially so easily. Especially someone who had a habit of falling herself. Except with her type of falls, Sienna ended up with real bodily harm, and Vivian’s damage was more emotional and self-inflicted.
“What do you want to talk about?” Sienna asked, frowning slightly. She stroked a strand of wavy hair from her cheek to behind her ear. Another one fell in its place. Vivian’s fingers itched to brush it away. She didn’t. She knew the risk.
“I want to apologize,” Vivian said, rather surprisingly. It wasn’t like she’d planned to find Sienna out here on the main deck. The odds of that were quite low. But now that she had, an apology felt like the only reasonable thing to do. The only thing to do.
“I’ve been completely unprofessional,” she went on. “The other night when you kissed me, I should’ve stopped it before it turned into anything. I know I did eventually, but I should’ve stopped it the moment the kiss started.”
Sienna opened her mouth to say something, but Vivian didn’t let her. The quicker she got this monologue off her chest, the better. “I also shouldn’t have avoided you for two days. I understand how that might have made things feel more confusing.”
“I’m not confused,” Sienna said so fast that the rest of Vivian’s apology fell away. “And you don’t have to apologize for any of that. I kissed you. I should be the one who says sorry.”
But Sienna didn’t say sorry. Or look even remotely sorry. In fact, Sienna looked the opposite of apologetic. She stepped forward. The corner of her mouth lifted. She didn’t blink. Or maybe Vivian didn’t notice because they were blinking at the exact same time. Perfectly in sync.
If she had any common sense, she’d back away right now. But she’d been the one to initiate this conversation. This was on her as much as it was on Sienna.
“I didn’t kiss Holly today,” Sienna said. “There was this moment when the sun was gone and we were sitting on a stump looking at the stars and I forgot all about the cameras around us…” She inhaled deeply and paused.
Vivian knew what she was going to say because she had watched the footage earlier and had listened to Elise narrate the entire scene in that aggressively disappointed tone of hers. Elise had barked, “Why the fuck didn’t Sienna kiss Holly? The moment was perfect. It couldn’t get any more perfect.”
“I should’ve let her kiss me,” Sienna finished, her voice dropping to almost a whisper. “But I didn’t want to. Because…” her words trailed off again.
The way she looked at Vivian made her knees feel weak, which was probably the corniest line ever, but it was true. Truer than true. Vivian’s knees were threatening to give out.
“Sienna—” Vivian started.
But Sienna interrupted her. “I wanted to kiss you.”
It was four simple words that, when put together, landed like a small explosion. With tons of casualties. Or maybe just one. Vivian was gravely injured. But not that close to death just yet to lie still and do nothing. No. She had one last push in her.
While the cicadas seemed to hold their breath, Vivian stepped forward.
Her fingers found the edge of Sienna’s jaw and, almost on instinct, traced the delicate line there.
“This is…,” she started, but she didn’t have time to add how kissing Sienna would be the worst idea out there, because Sienna’s eyes flicked down to her mouth and that was it.
The last thread of Vivian’s restraint snapped.
Vivian didn’t just close the gap between them; she collided with Sienna.
Her lips crushed hers. Her tongue slid into Sienna’s mouth, and her fingers tangled in Sienna’s hair.
She couldn’t get close enough. At least not with their clothes on.
But then she realized they were standing on the main lodge deck.
They were visible to anyone who couldn’t sleep and felt the need to take a midnight stroll. She knew they had to go somewhere else.
“Come on. Let’s go to my villa,” Vivian said, finding Sienna’s hand. “Before anyone sees us.”
Sienna nodded, and together they rushed down the steps, tiptoeing as quietly as they possibly could.
Vivian prayed there weren’t any cameras directed to the deck, but then again, of course, there would be.
This was a five-star lodge. There was bound to be proper security.
Her prayer shifted to hoping no one ever bothered checking the footage.
She wouldn’t just get into trouble for this.
She’d get fired. Which should’ve made her rethink all of this, yank her hand back, and tell Sienna never to look at her again.
But it seemed Vivian wasn’t thinking at all.
They reached the villa quickly and practically tripped over each other as they shut the door behind them.
Vivian pressed Sienna against it and braced her hands on either side of Sienna’s face.
“What we’re doing is wrong,” she said, her mouth so close to Sienna’s she could feel her own breath rebounding.
“I know,” Sienna whispered.
“It’s not fair to any of the contestants.”
“I know.”
“They all came here to meet you. To fall in love with you.” Vivian’s voice was softer now, pleading, like she hoped Sienna would see reason and stop this before it went too far.
But then also, she didn’t want that.
Sienna bit her bottom lip, and Vivian’s eyes caught the movement.
Fuck. She wanted to kiss her so badly she could feel her own pulse in her temples.
Her hands itched to move, to slide into Sienna’s hair, to tilt her head just so and bridge that tiny gap between them that felt so impossibly small and terrifyingly huge all at once.
“I want you to kiss me,” Sienna whispered.
“Are you sure?” Vivian asked.
“Yes,” Sienna breathed, which was more than enough for Vivian.
She leaned in. Slow enough for Sienna to let out a little desperate moan.
Fast enough for Vivian to feel a charge crackling in the air.
Then she kissed Sienna hard on the mouth as her hands fell down to Sienna’s waist. Vivian spun them both around and moved toward the bed.
Once they reached it, she pushed Sienna onto the mattress, and her fingers immediately went for the buttons of Sienna’s faded blue jeans. She didn’t waste time.
Neither of them did. Their clothes were off in seconds.
Then Vivian slid onto the bed between Sienna’s legs until she was lying on top of her, until they were face to face, breast to breast, hips over hips.
She moaned at first contact. The feel of Sienna’s body beneath hers was hard to explain.
Smooth and silky and perfectly warm in the air-conditioned room, but also like falling onto a hotel bed that was just the right amount of soft after a hard day’s work.
“You’re gorgeous—” Sienna started. “Like in a god clearly has favorites kind of way.”
Vivian laughed and cut her off with a kiss.
For a while that was all they did. In fact, Vivian didn’t want to stop kissing her.
She couldn’t imagine her tongue not being in Sienna’s mouth.
But at the same time, she had other plans that required her tongue.
Plans that could only be put into action if she detached her mouth from Sienna’s.
Which she did.
Vivian broke the kiss and instead planted one on Sienna’s neck.
Then she inched down until she reached Sienna’s breasts.
She took one nipple in her mouth and rolled it with her tongue.
Then she moved over to her other nipple and nibbled it with her teeth.
She did this over and over again mostly because Sienna’s body was reacting in a way that had Vivian smiling.
Sienna was shaking, like an earthquake. Her hips were pressing upward, and her moans were coming out fast like bullets.
“Not so loud,” Vivian said, not because she was scared of someone overhearing, but because she knew exactly what being told to keep quiet did to a person.
Sienna clamped her lips shut and tipped her head back into the pillow just as Vivian moved further down.
This time, Vivian made her way all the way to the edge of the bed before starting upward.
First she kissed Sienna’s calves. Her skin smelled of sunscreen and coconut.
Then she tongued Sienna’s right inner knee.
Then left. When Vivian reached her thighs, she bit down on the soft flesh, hard enough to leave a bite mark, and waited for Sienna to squirm.
“Fuck,” Sienna whispered. Her hands were in fists. She clung to the sheets like she wanted to rip them apart. “You’re really embracing wild Africa.”
Vivian chuckled softly but didn’t say anything back. Her tongue was making its way up and up toward Sienna’s clit. There was no time for chitchat.
And there was absolutely nothing like that first lick. Vivian reached Sienna’s center, stuck out her tongue, and flattened it ceremoniously against Sienna’s folds.
Sienna moaned. Vivian could never have predicted just how loudly she would moan. She was loud enough that Vivian actually had to wait a second before continuing. She had no idea how far away the next villa was, but suddenly it felt awfully close.
At least Sienna had the common sense to smack her hand across her mouth.
Vivian hoped she’d keep it there. If anyone heard them, if they heard Sienna in her villa, they’d be completely fucked.
And not just a little oops-we-broke-a-rule fucked.
But the kind that came with an HR meeting.
Vivian tried not to think about that. This wasn’t the moment for it.
Not when she closed her mouth around Sienna’s clit and tasted her completely, and most certainly not when Sienna pulled gingerly at Vivian’s short hair, awakening all those nerve endings.
Luckily for Vivian, every thought she’d ever had about stopping this seemed to evaporate like water on a sunbaked stone. All Vivian could focus on was the way Sienna’s hips bucked into her face as she licked and sucked and grazed Sienna’s clit with her teeth.
Soon Sienna’s body was on the verge of collapse.
For a second, Vivian thought Sienna was going to roll onto her side and go to sleep.
But then Sienna was pulling her onto the bed.
And they were kissing again. Hard and fast and soft and slow.
Time passed. Vivian had no idea how long, but then Sienna’s hand reached for Vivian’s center, and before she knew it, she was sliding three fingers into her so easily Vivian nearly came right then.
But she didn’t. Thankfully. That would be embarrassing.
Or maybe not, considering how long she’d already pushed off that hum between her legs.
They moved together. Vivian rolled her hips. Sienna slipped her fingers in and out. It wasn’t long. Maybe a minute. Maybe less when that electrifying feeling crested and Vivian’s body came apart in one long, relentless shudder that seemed to last forever.
Eventually, it stopped.
And when it did, when her breathing steadied and her heart stopped racing, something else crept in. It was a dark cloud rolling in on what should’ve been the bluest sky she’d ever seen.
Without waiting even a beat, Vivian slid over to the edge of the bed and glanced back at Sienna, all naked and glorious and dreamy-eyed as she lay on her side.
“You know this doesn’t mean anything,” she said.
“It’s a one-time thing, and I know that most people say that, and they end up repeating it over and over again until it gets messy.
” She exhaled hard. “But we’re not going to be those people. ”
“So, you think this was a mistake?” Sienna asked, frowning slightly.
“Yes,” Vivian said when she really wanted to say no. “This was great. But that’s all it was. There are no feelings involved. At least not from my side.”
Of course, it wasn’t true. She could imagine a life with Sienna.
But in that life, Vivian’s career would be over.
Her reputation and everything she worked for would be gone.
That revelation had hit her hard, fast, and all at once…
right after she’d climaxed. Vivian loved her job.
She liked Sienna. Only one of those was clearly meant to be.
“You came here to meet someone,” Vivian said when Sienna’s face flooded with disappointment. “You came here to fall in love. There are nine women out there waiting for just that. I need you to give them a chance.”
“But I don’t want them. I want you,” Sienna said, sitting up.
“I thought we were on the same page. I thought that’s what this was all about.
” She gestured to the bed, but Vivian didn’t want to look at it, because looking at it might just force her to get back into it.
Instead, she snapped her head toward the door. “You need to go.”
“But I don’t want to. I want y—”
“No,” Vivian said, not sure if what she was about to say next was even true or just an excuse. “You want the idea of me. But I’m not here for the same reasons they are.”
Sienna shook her head slowly, as if she were in a state of deep shock. “So that’s it? This is it? We sleep together and you decide it doesn’t work for you?”
“Yes,” Vivian said matter-of-factly, even though it wasn’t that simple. None of this was simple. “Now please leave before anyone sees you.”