Chapter 2 #2
Aaron
Meet me at Rise and Caffeinate in 10.
No “hello”. No “how are you” just a simple instruction.
Guess he ran out of pleasantries after I left him on unread for hours. Not wanting to bother with a reply, I reacted with a thumbs up and pulled my oversized sweater over my head.
Order me a Chai Latte with oat milk.
I decided to text him, in case he forgot my usual order.
And a pain au chocolat.
Aaron
That's not breakfast.
It is. The best one.
A smile tugged at my lips from our exchange and from the post-workout endorphins settling in. I really needed these two hours by myself on the mat to center myself. Now I was ready to take on the day and my brother.
When I arrived at Rise and Caffeinate, I immediately spotted Aaron sitting in his Titans crewneck.
My Chai Latte and delicious breakfast sat on the table in front of him, while he frowned at his phone and held his boring Americano.
I suppressed my shudder from his horrible drink before dropping into the armchair across from him.
The café wasn't too busy for it being almost noon, and most people grabbed a quick lunch here. This was the hottest spot on campus and my favorite hangout place whenever I needed to study and have some time to myself. Which was all the time, as I was a notorious introvert.
If it wasn't for Nova and the girlfriends of Aaron's soccer team, I would have had a horrible freshman year. Now, with Daisy as a roommate, when both of us craved solitude, it was better for me.
“What's up?” I asked my brother, grabbing my coffee and taking a long sip. My hip screamed in protest from the drop into the armchair, and I winced.
He took one look at my messy curls, the ones I'd just let down from my messy bun, my workout clothes, and my yoga mat strapped across my back.
“Did you even go to class?” he asked, his eyes narrowing at me. Same blue eyes, like mine, and same wavy brown hair. “Is your hip hurting?”
“Why ask a question you already know the answer to?” I tilted my head, annoyed by the inquisition, and sighed. “Didn't feel like it after last night, and of course not. It never hurts.”
“Want to fill me in?” he asked, concern lining every inch of his face.
He was never protective of me the way he became after my surgery.
For some reason, since my hip replacement, he saw me as weaker.
As someone who needed constant supervision and protection.
It was his personal mission to help me navigate this real life, and even the tiny failure in my assimilation drove him mad.
“Nothing happened, Aaron. I got upset because my date was a jerk,” I said, and only mentally added that he thought just because he paid for dinner, he was entitled to sex in return.
A shudder worked its way up my spine, and I grimaced.
“I kicked him hard in his balls, so I doubt we will have a second date. Hence, the pain. I kicked with my wrong leg.” I crossed my legs as I talked, forcing my voice and face to mirror indifference.
“I got a bit upset; sorry I interrupted.”
“You should have just come to our party,” he muttered. “You know everyone there, and none of this would have happened.”
“I need to meet new people, and if I don't step outside of my comfort zone, it will never happen,” I explained to him carefully.
Not that I was looking forward to ever trusting a guy, but I knew the desperate need to prove to myself I could be just like everyone else would overwhelm me, and I'll go out with another douche.
It was a vicious cycle.
Aaron sighed. “Fine, but I want you to keep calling me whenever you feel minimally uncomfortable.” I nodded in agreement. “And turn your location back on.”
“Not a chance, bro.”
“Rosie.” It was my childhood nickname that rolled off his tongue easily. But I was no longer Rosie. I forced people to call me Rosalie; it was more mature and grown-up. I was no longer the little ballerina Rosie.
“No, I have boundaries,” I replied firmly. “I will always share it when it's necessary. But all the time, no. That's a violation of my privacy.”
“Not like I would stalk you,” Aaron rolled his eyes. “I just want to make sure you're safe.”
“And how does my location tell you that?” I challenged, and the way he pressed his lips together, I knew I won.
“Anyway, if that's all, I need to crack on with making up for my missed classes.” I moved to stand, but Aaron gave me a look that kept my butt planted on the seat. “What now?”
“Finish your breakfast,” he nudged his chin towards my lonely pain au chocolat, and I tore a small piece off. I would have loved to soak it into my coffee, but that would have been way too messy for a café setting. “And I want to talk to you about something else.”
I exhaled dramatically and leaned back in my chair. “Tell me.”
“You know Dex has been sent to Pilates for his ACL injury, and I was thinking it might be good for you and him both if you were the one who helped him out.”
I gaped at him, my eyes falling out and my mouth hanging open. “Ummm... I don't think I'm qualified.”
Aaron shot me a look. “I think you are.”
“Yeah, it's a big pressure being responsible for someone in that way, Aaron. I can re-injure him.”
“You do it for yourself,” he argued, and he wasn't wrong there. “And you guys bonded last semester. I don’t get what happened.”
“Nothing. I know my own body; I don't know his. Bonding and hanging out is different than guiding him through this.”
“I mean, if it's my body you want to know, all you have to do is ask, babe.” Dex's deep, seductive voice sounded from behind me, and I had to school my features to not react.
He probably knew I had a massive crush on him; every soccer girlfriend teased me about it last year.
But I thought I was over it. Clearly, not.
I felt heat stain my cheeks as I turned to stare at him. He was dressed in jeans and a t-shirt, the blue of his Titans T-shirt making the blue of his eyes pop. I loved how his shirt molded onto his muscular arms and defined torso. He wasn't bulky, but he was strong.
“You're early,” Aaron scolded him. “I told you to come later.”
Oh, so they planned this.
I crossed my arms. “The answer is no. Sorry, but I'm not going to be responsible for his re-injury. You're better off with a qualified person.”
The truth was, I'd been avoiding everyone since July. Especially Derek.
After the re-injury, after realizing my body couldn't handle even gentle dancing without breaking down, I shut everyone out. Every text from Derek felt like a reminder of what I'd lost, again. He was recovering, getting stronger, preparing to return to soccer.
And I was breaking down in my childhood bedroom, icing a hip that would never be the same, crying into my pillow at 3 AM.
I couldn't face him. Couldn't face his pity. Couldn't face admitting that while he was healing, I was falling apart.
So, I stopped replying until the texts stopped coming.
It was easier than explaining. Easier than being vulnerable.
But now, looking at him, I realized what that distance had cost me. I'd lost my closest friend right when I needed him most.
“Rosie, you know what he's going through,” my brother said, his voice almost a whisper. A shiver worked its way up my spine, the reminder of my life taking a reroute I never planned on.
“It's different,” I muttered, slamming my coffee on the table with a shaking hand, before I glanced at Derek. “Sorry, but I can't help you. Please don't ask again.”
He stared at me, confusion clear on his beautiful face, and his blue eyes widened as he searched my face for any sign of why and what set me off the way it did. He deserved an explanation for my ghosting him, but I couldn’t give it to him.
I was miles from the Rosie he hung out with last year. But the longer I tried pretending I was just like everyone else, the harder it became. No one really understood the pain of giving up your dreams. No one.
Dex had his whole season in front of him. He didn't have to give up shit.
Standing, I grabbed my yoga mat and, without saying another word to either of them, walked away.
“I'm sorry,” I muttered to myself, because I would have loved spending time with Dex.
I would have loved to help him get to know my new passion and teach him Pilates.
But I couldn't be the one to bear full responsibility if anything happened to him and he truly lost everything he’d worked for over the past months.