Chapter Seventeen
MERCS
It’s been one hell of a week.
Appointments, blood draws, learning how to hold a syringe without my hand shaking, and watching Effa pretend she isn’t scared when I know damn well she is.
But finally, we’re back in Ligonier.
Dr. Wakefield kept us in Pittsburgh longer than planned. He wanted Effa close by while she adjusted to the hormone therapy, and he wanted to make sure I was okay the first time I injected her.
The first one was rough, more for Effa than me, but once the nurse walked me through it step by step, something shifted. It stopped feeling clinical and started feeling protective.
I get to be part of this.
Part of her healing.
Part of her staying strong.
And I’m not going anywhere.
Being away from Kiera was harder than I let on. But Gran had her covered, and Tank was in and out of the house every day. I kept getting updates.
Chemo’s kicking her ass, but she’s still standing—pale, exhausted—but standing.
She’s fighting.
And right now, Effa and I are getting ready for brunch with Donny and Lettie. Lettie chose Kammie’s, and neither of us had the heart to veto it, even though it’s their last day here.
Maybe Lilah won’t be working.
Fingers crossed.
“Ready to go?” I call out, shrugging into my leather jacket.
Effa rounds the corner, and for a second the world… stops.
Boho pants, oversized sweater, and a scarf wrapped loosely around her neck. Even bundled up for October, she looks like she belongs in a sunbeam somewhere.
I smile before I can stop myself.
“Why are you looking at me like that?” she asks.
“Like what?”
“Like you’re plotting something.”
I laugh and pull her into me before she can dodge. She squeals as I wrap my arms around her waist.
“Just thinking I’m a fucking lucky bastard.”
She rolls her eyes. “You’re getting soft.”
“Shut up.”
She slips from my grip and heads toward the stairs, and yeah, I watch her walk away. I’m not dead.
Downstairs, Kiera’s perched at the breakfast bar in pajamas and a beanie, skin pale but smiling. Gran’s already in a Christmas apron, oven open, gingerbread scent filling the kitchen.
“That smells unreal,” Effa says.
Gran beams. “ ’Tis the season, sweetheart.”
“It’s October,” I remind her.
Both Gran and Kiera scoff in unison.
“Never too early,” Gran declares. “Besides, we wanted you two to have some in case you can’t make it home for Christmas.”
“Guys! You know I’ll be coming home for the holidays, even so, I’m not sure if I will go back on tour with the girls yet. It all depends on what’s happening here. But I’m not going to miss Christmas for anything, and Effa will be with me, right?” I ask, and Effa smiles wide.
“Sure will. I know we’re not one hundred percent sure when the tour is kicking off again, but it will break for Christmas, and there’s nowhere we’d rather be than with you guys.”
Kiera jumps off her stool, her face pale, and seems to have no energy as she steps up to my side and leans in, cuddling me. “Thank you, Kaden. I love having you around so much. I just want to spend as much time as possible with you.”
A somber tone fills the air, and I wrap my arms around Kiera, feeling the need to cuddle and to be close to her.
I know she’s getting weaker. I see it in the way she moves and acts.
It scares me, and so coming home for the holidays, if we do go back on tour, is going to be a major thing for me, because spending as much time with my sister is my main priority.
“Me too, booger-butt, you know I love you. And I promise when I get home tonight… you, me, that sofa, we’re getting our movie fix on.”
Kiera smiles wide and nods. “Deal, as long as you lay off Raoul. He’s been super sweet to me.”
I groan while rolling my eyes. “Fine. Only marginally fine, though.” I chuckle. “But seriously, we have to go. Moral of the story, I’ll be here for Christmas, and I can spend all my time with you. Okay?” I lean out, embracing her. She holds onto me tightly, and I smile, bending to kiss her temple.
“Right. We have to go. Brunch is calling,” I tell her, and she smiles at me and then Effa.
“Have fun, kids,” Kiera quips.
I roll my eyes, yanking her beanie down over her eyes before I let her go. Her sweet laughter fills the air as I grab Effa’s hand and walk with her out the door and down the street toward Kammie’s.
We make it to the diner quickly, and I reach out for her hand again.
She laces her fingers with mine, and we walk inside.
I take a deep breath, trying my hardest not to look around and seem obvious, but I can’t help my eyes wandering over to the counter to look for Lilah.
Her strawberry blonde hair catches my attention straight away as our eyes lock.
The plate in her hand drops to the counter with a clunk when she spots me.
Effa turns to look at her and sighs as I look away, hating that she has to be here.
She squeezes my hand, and I squeeze back.
We walk up to the booth, and Lettie’s eyes light up when she notices us approaching. “Oh… hi, guys. Welcome back. It’s such a shame you’ve only come back to Ligonier on our last day in the States.” She jumps up from the booth to give Effa a tight squeeze.
Effa hugs her back, and I smile, leaning in to give Donny a handshake, but he pushes my hand out of the way and stands up to embrace me over the table. I chuckle and hug him back.
Effa snickers and then leans in to embrace her father. “Hi, Daddy.”
“Baby girl, I’m so proud of you. I’m sorry we have to go home so quickly after your diagnosis. If you need us, though, I can shift things around and make it so we can stay?” Donny suggests, and Effa shakes her head.
“No. Thanks, Dad, for everything. I’ve disrupted your lives for long enough. Lettie has to get back to her students, and you have to go back to your life, too. I can’t keep you all to myself… even though I really want to.”
Donny and Lettie sit down in the booth, and we follow on the opposite side, getting comfortable.
I pick up the menu and look at it as Lettie reaches out for Effa’s hand over the table.
“Now, darling, you know if you ever need anything, we’re only a phone call away.
We might be chillin’ at the pad, but that doesn’t mean we can’t come right back here lickety-split. ”
I stifle a laugh at how Lettie always talks like she’s trapped in the seventies. But somehow she manages to make it sound cool again. I think it’s just her way, and I really like her. She has a nurturing aura about her. She’s good to be around.
“Thanks, Lettie, I’ve loved having you guys here. It means so much you came all this way for me… for us. We’ve all loved having you here.”
I smile and nod. “I agree. It’s been great meeting you,” I say as someone appears to our side.
We all look at Lilah, looking very stone-faced, holding a notepad and pen.
I tense up, as does Effa, while I glare at Lilah, wondering what the hell she wants.
“Welcome to Kammie’s. Can I take your order?” Her tone is flat and unwelcoming.
I let out an exhale louder than I meant to, making Donny look at me, then at Lilah, then back at me again. Donny jumps in first, ordering pie and milkshakes for the table. Effa hands over her menu with a polite smile, and Lilah stomps off.
Donny looks at me and clears his throat. “That was your ex, wasn’t it?”
“Yeah… long story.”
“Seems like there’s bad blood?” Lettie queries.
“Oh, yeah… there is.”
“From you or her?” Donny asks.
“Her, Donny. She’s the reason I left Ligonier,” I reply, and Donny raises his brow.
“Ooh… I see… oh, well, her loss is my daughter’s gain. More fool her, I say,” Donny beams.
“Exactly. Without that crap happening, I wouldn’t be here today with Effa by my side, living my best life,” I reply, wanting her dad to remember how I feel about Effa as I look into her eyes while she smiles.
“Oh, he’s so sweet. Isn’t he sweet, Donny?” Lettie chimes, and I chuckle.
“He’s saying all the right things, that’s for sure.”
Effa smiles softly.
When Lilah returns with the tray, the air shifts again. She sets everything down without looking at me. One word is uttered, “Enjoy,” then she turns to leave.
Effa reaches out, grabs her arm, and my head snaps up.
“Lilah,” Effa says gently. “I know there’s history… and pain. But I’m going to be in Ligonier more often. I don’t want tension every time we walk in here. I’d like us to be civil, maybe even friends.”
I take a deep breath, knowing that holding onto this anger isn’t healthy, and what fucking good is it doing anyway, especially now that I’ve sorted my shit with Shane.
I don’t want Lilah back—ever. So what’s the point in hanging on to this bad blood between us?
There’s none. So if Lilah’s willing to let this go and move forward, then I will too.