Chapter 9 Taylor
TAYLOR
My heart is pounding so hard that I barely register the flashing lights and the siren.
But when a police officer bursts through the door, I’m suddenly snapped back to reality.
Is Roan in trouble?
Am I?
You shouldn’t be kissing your landlord, a little voice whispers in the back of my head.
But that’s not a criminal offense. And besides, he was definitely going to be kissing me.
Right?
“Liam?” Roan says, a grin spreading across his face. “What’s going on, man?”
“We got a call that someone was in here poking around with flashlights,” Liam says. “I know the place has been closed for a while now. Is everything okay?”
“Yeah,” Roan says. “We were just setting the place up to open again, and we flipped a breaker with the Christmas lights. That’s why we were using flashlights.”
“Good,” Liam says before his eyes slide over to me. “Who’s this?”
“This is Taylor Greer,” Roan says. “Taylor is running the bookstore now. Taylor, Liam’s an old friend.”
“Nice to meet you,” I hear myself say weakly, grateful that Roan knows this man, and probably everyone else in town.
Liam pulls his walkie-talkie off his chest.
“False alarm at the bookshop,” he says into it. “I’ve got the owner and the tenant both here.”
There’s a buzz and a faint reply.
“Good to meet you, Taylor,” Liam says as he replaces his walkie-talkie on his chest. “You haven’t been here long. I would remember seeing you around.”
I’m not positive, but it almost seems like his voice is… flirty?
“I’m new in town,” I agree. “It’s great here so far.”
“Nothing like a small town,” Liam replies and gives me a rakish smile. “We look out for each other here.”
“Speaking of which,” Roan says, his voice a little louder than ours. “Thank you for stopping by, Liam. I appreciate you having an eye on the place, especially when it was empty.”
Holy cow. He’s dismissing the man.
Maybe Roan really is jealous. This is the second time tonight he’s shut down a guy who was maybe checking me out a little.
Liam smirks at me and turns his attention back to Roan.
“Message received, buddy,” he says. “You two have a good night. Stay safe.”
“Will do,” Roan says.
“Good night,” I say, giving a weak little wave.
“Oh, hey,” Liam says when he’s at the door. “What time do you open the lot tomorrow? I was going to grab a tree.”
“You can pick one out now,” Roan tells him right away. “Go on over and start looking, I’ll be right behind you.”
“You don’t have to do that,” the officer says.
“It’s my pleasure,” Roan replies, in a way that doesn’t leave room for more conversation.
Liam tips his hat to me and heads out the front door.
“Wow,” I say. “That was…”
“Yeah,” Roan says.
His jaw is tense again and I know which Roan I’ve got in front of me right now. He won’t be joking and smiling, that’s for sure. And he definitely won’t be kissing me.
I wish that didn’t disappoint me so much. I know I shouldn’t be falling for the Christmas tree farmer next door, not when I have so much going on and definitely not when I’ve proven that I have the absolute worst judgment.
I brace myself for whatever he wants to say to me, which I’m guessing is something along the lines of regretting almost kissing me, and saying he just wants to be friends.
“What are you doing next Saturday?” he asks. “Will the shop be open by then?”
“Not yet,” I tell him, a little surprised. “I guess I was just planning to keep getting organized.”
“Well, if you can get away, there’s a whole day of holiday activities in town,” he says. “It’s called the Angel Mountain Christmas Mingle.”
“Oh, right,” I say. “I’ve seen a few signs around town. It looks like fun.”
“Would you want to go together?” he asks. “It might be a good way to meet a bunch of people and just get a sense of the town.”
“You already know everyone,” I state the obvious.
“Pretty much,” he agrees.
“With Meg?” I ask, then feel silly about it. I don’t need a ten-year-old chaperone to feel comfortable. But it sounds like the kind of day a kid would love.
“Of course,” he says, smiling again so that his eyes crinkle at the edges. “With Meg.”
“Definitely,” I tell him.
“Great,” he says. “It’s a date. I’m gonna go help Liam out now.”
A date?
“Of course,” I tell him. “See you tomorrow.”
He nods and there’s this tiny pause. I wonder if he’s thinking about grabbing me close and kissing me, like I want him to.
But he heads for the door and I just watch after him for a moment.
He just asked me out, even if his daughter is coming along. We’re going to spend the day together.
He said it was a date. Maybe he just meant it like it’s on his calendar. But looking back over tonight, I’m pretty sure he meant date as in date.
It’s a lot. And I should feel nervous about it, or maybe I should even have cold feet.
Instead, I feel like I’m walking on air.
As I’m staring at the door to the bookshop and wondering what on earth is going on in my aching heart, my phone buzzes in my pocket.
I pull it out and look at the screen to see my grandmother’s contact photo.
I tried her earlier today, and I’m really glad she’s calling back. I know she stays busy and she has a whole crew looking out for her, but I worry a little bit anyway when she doesn’t call me back right away.
“Hey, Grammy,” I say, tucking the phone against my ear. “How are you?”
“Oh, I’m happy as a clam now that I’m talking with you,” she says, her voice the same sweet, husky sound its always been.
“Me too,” I tell her, meaning it. “Is PopPop right there?”
“No, ma’am,” she says with a chuckle in her voice. “The boys are out at the movies.”
The retirement community where my grandparents live has everything—golf, shopping, even a movie theater. Grammy says it’s like living at the mall. And the boys are PopPop’s silver-haired crew of friends.
“That’s great,” I tell her. “What are they seeing?”
“I believe it’s The Good, the Bad and the Ugly,” she tells me.
That’s the other thing. The movie theater shows all the movies that were popular when they were young. The music on the speakers at the pools is the same way. It’s a lot of what I’d call classic rock. PopPop just calls it good music, not like that nonsense you kids listen to.
But he says it with a broad smile, because he doesn’t mean a word of it. I think they’d do just fine in an elevator building in Manhattan, hanging out with the younger crowd and listening to hip-hop. But I’m glad they’re doing exactly what makes them happy.
“Amazing,” I tell Grammy. “Give him a hug from me when he gets back.”
“I will,” she promises. “Now tell me, what’s got you sounding like it’s already Christmas morning?”
“You noticed,” I say, trying to buy myself time. Of course I should have known that my grandmother would instantly read my mood.
“You’re my favorite granddaughter,” she says firmly. I’m her only granddaughter, but it still makes me smile.
“There’s a boy, well, a man,” I tell her, my feet carrying me to the nearest side window.
“I’m all ears,” Grammy murmurs, sounding fascinated.
The twinkling lights over the tree lot are so pretty, but I have eyes only for Roan.
“He’s really great,” I hear myself say as I watch him stride through the lot to show Liam another tree, a steely expression on his handsome face. “But he’s older, and he’s sort of… serious.”
“How much older?” Grammy asks.
“I’m not sure,” I admit. “But he has a ten-year-old daughter, and she’s just the best.”
“Is she serious too?” Grammy asks.
“He seems to think she’s shy,” I tell her. “Though I haven’t seen that side of her. She’s really chatty with me. She loves books.”
“Sounds like your kind of girl,” Grammy says approvingly.
“She is,” I tell her.
“Well, all of this sounds interesting,” Grammy says. “You know your PopPop was older than me.”
“Still is,” I tease her.
“You’ll find that it matters less as you get older,” she says warmly. “I think it’s most important that you share values and that you have mutual respect.”
“I’m still getting to know him,” I admit. “But he’s definitely respectful.”
“So why don’t you sound as excited as you were a minute ago?” Grammy asks.
I sigh and pace away from the window.
“I… don’t have the best track record with my decisions lately,” I tell her.
“Mistakes are how we learn,” Grammy says firmly.
“Well, I’ve never really dated someone seriously,” I say. “And with Meg in the picture I feel like I have to be sure it can work. Also, the whole neighbor-slash-landlord thing.”
“The what?” Grammy asks patiently.
“Oh, right,” I say. “I forgot to mention that he’s my landlord and he sells trees from his family farm in the lot right next to the bookshop.”
“Oh my,” Grammy says.
“I just think about the messes I’ve gotten myself into,” I go on. “I mean, not just the terrible men I dated in the city, but… what happened in publishing. Maybe my judgement isn’t the best.”
“Oh, honey,” Grammy says.
“I mean, if I mess this up and he wants me out,” I hear myself say. “I don’t have any place else to run to from here.”
“Taylor Rose Greer,” Grammy says firmly. “You always have a place to run to. Anytime, no matter the reason, wherever I am is your home too.”
“Thanks, Grammy,” I manage as tears fill my eyes.
“Now, sweetheart,” she says. “I know you feel like you’ve made mistakes in the past. But you have a good, kind heart. I know that if you close your eyes and you sit with this, you’ll know whether it’s right or not.”
My grandmother has always had an unshakable belief in me that I’ve done nothing to deserve. Her words warm me, but they don’t do much to combat my fears.
“You think I only feel that way because I’m your grandmother?” she guesses correctly when I don’t answer. “Well, what about the time you insisted that we check on Heddy Carmichael?”
I can’t help feeling a little redeemed by that memory.
When Heddy was late for my grandmother’s pre-Christmas sandwich buffet I knew something was wrong.
I was supposed to be serving drinks to the guests, but I walked away from the line at Grammy and PopPop’s little bar and dragged my mother with me to see what was keeping Heddy.
It turned out that she had broken an ankle getting out of her shower. If we hadn’t come as quickly as we did the doctors said it could have been very bad.
“That was just one good instinct,” I say.
“I’ll bet Heddy’s grateful you had it,” Grammy retorts. “And I suspect that you have a good feeling about this man and his little girl. If you didn’t, you wouldn’t have been so happy when I called.”
“Maybe,” I allow.
“Now you overthought it as soon as I started asking questions,” Grammy says.
“And I’m sorry for that. But all I want is for you to follow your heart and be happy, my sweet girl.
The world may have thrown a wrench into some of your plans, but that’s not your fault.
Don’t let it make my lion cub into a meek little lamb. ”
“Thank you, Grammy,” I tell her, feeling a little better at her kind words. “How are your plans for the holidays coming?”
That launches her into a truly delightful, gossipy chat about all her plans, her friends, and the amazing meals she’s going to prepare.
I let myself relax a little and just enjoy our talk.
Just after we wrap up the call, I spot Roan heading back out toward his truck with his brother. The tension that’s so often on his face is gone now. He looks… thoughtful.
Suddenly, he turns to look up at the shop and there’s no time for me to turn away. He’s caught me watching him.
Mortified, I feel my cheeks heat and I wish I could disappear under the floorboards.
But he smiles and waves to me, and I find myself waving back.
Roan seemed so cold when I first met him. But now that he’s letting me in, I can see that he’s also accepting and kind.
I watch him until he bends to unplug the lights and he all but disappears into the darkness of the night outside.
Maybe I really can follow my heart just one more time…