26
Huxley
Ireach across the table and place my hand on Val’s. She flinches, so I rub my thumb over her hand as she finally looks at me.
“Stop watching them.”
She blinks slowly. “What?”
“You keep watching every girl that walks by. Just stop and be here with me.”
I asked Val to have lunch on campus with me today, hoping to make her feel better after our not-so-great second date. It wasn’t terrible, but we ended the night with a fight that barely got settled. We agreed not to fight anymore, but how well does that really work in a relationship?
It doesn’t. That’s the honest answer. Because in normal relationships, when a couple fights, they call it off. They don’t swear off fighting to try and make it work. They break up, accept their losses, and move on.
But we aren’t normal. We aren’t even real, technically. But I’ll do whatever it takes to make her feel better. To make sure we don’t fight again. Because I hate fighting with her.
She deserves to be in a happy, supportive, loving relationship. And all I’ve done is fuck things up.
And that’s why we’re here. Sitting at a table in the middle of campus, while every single girl who passes by stares at Val in front of me.
They try looking at me first, but when I don’t give them the time of day, they glare at Valentina.
And it didn’t take her long to realize they were looking at her.
She’s barely touched her food because of it, and it’s the reason she flinched, too.
She looks down at her food, barely pushing it around with her fork. “It has to be annoying, though, right?” she asks softly. “Having so many people stare at you all the time?”
You have no idea. I stab another bite of food and shrug. “I mean, you must feel the same way.”
She stops mid-chew, staring at me like I’ve lost my mind. “What?”
I circle my fork in the air. “All the guys staring at you. It must get annoying for you, too.”
She laughs incredulously. “You can’t be serious?”
“Why?”
She shakes her head like I’m crazy. “Huxley, guys, don’t stare at me.”
“Yes, they do. I’m almost 100% certain that every guy who’s seen you on campus has fantasized about you at least once.”
Her eyes widen past what should be possible. How could she not see every guy she passes check her out? I’ve seen guys openly stare her down as she walks in front of them. Their eyes going from her chest to her ass before they point her out to their friends. How has she never seen that before?
Granted, she usually keeps her head down when she walks around campus.
She’s a shy girl, and most shy people don’t realize when someone is looking at them.
Mainly because they don’t want to be looked at.
Valentina Demarco—as gorgeous as she is, but as shy as she is—is a contradiction that no one will ever understand.
“Have you fantasized about me?”
I choke on my water but quickly recover. Hopefully, she thinks she just caught me off guard and not that she caught me being like every other guy around.
“Fantasizing is for people who don’t have sex that often.”
Her eyes dim slightly as she looks down. I shouldn’t have said that. It’s like I’m shoving it in her face that she’s never had sex.
She takes a deep breath and looks back at me. “Right. Why fantasize when you can just go out and do it so easily?”
Okay. That hurt. But I probably deserved that.
Val looks down quickly, like she didn’t mean to say that. Then she winces as if someone had kicked her under the table. Did she kick herself for bringing up my sex life? She’s caught on that I don’t like talking about it, but she shouldn’t be hurting herself for it.
She picks up her fork again but doesn’t eat. I think she’s only taken one bite since we got here.
Something is off. More off than her just being upset about the girls watching her and being mad at herself for bringing up my sex life. But I can’t ask her outright what’s wrong. Because if I do, that means that I’m opening myself up to answer similar questions, and I’m nowhere near ready for that.
“You must fantasize a lot,” I say, trying to ease the tension.
She shakes her head and barely looks at me. “I’ve never fantasized before.”
“You’re kidding?” She finally looks up at me as she shakes her head again. “How?”
She shrugs. “I mean, I’ve thought about sex in an overall concept. But I’ve never pictured someone in that way before.”
How does someone not fantasize about sex? At least once? Maybe… Jesus. Maybe she’s never even touched herself before. Is she that inexperienced?
“Maybe you should.”
She frowns. “What do you mean?”
“Maybe you should fantasize about someone. Maybe it will make you feel more comfortable to try things. If you fantasize about someone touching you, it won’t be so scary when someone actually does.”
She tilts her head as she thinks. So cute.
“Like an odd form of immersive therapy?”
I shrug. “Sure. I guess.” Whatever the fuck that is. “The point is, let your mind explore these things. And believe me, you’ll probably have a lot of fun while you do it.”
She bites her lip and looks down, nerves probably crashing inside her.
I really hope she goes through with this.
She deserves to know what she likes by being with herself first. But if she doesn’t think about me while she fantasizes, I might lose my mind.
Not that I’ll know, nor can I tell her to fantasize about me.
She glances over at a few more girls before staring at her food again. I look over at the girls, too. They smile at me, hoping I’ll give them some attention. When all they get from me is a glare, they finally get up and walk away.
I look back at my girl and catch a smile on her face. I smile too. Because she caught me sending those girls away. My foot moves on its own, gently nudging into her calf. She bites her lip and finally picks up her fork to take another bite of food, and I’ll take that.
I didn’t do much, but I put a smile on her face. And I’ll take that win over anything.