29. Kaia
Chapter Twenty-Nine
Kaia
At night, the beach house seems to exhale. The daytime noise fades—the footsteps, Finn’s laughter, the clatter from the kitchen—and everything settles into something softer. Something I’m slowly learning not to fear.
I stand just inside the back door, my fingers curled lightly around the doorframe as I look out at the hot tub. Steam rises into the cool night air. The ocean stretches beyond, dark and endless.
"Thinking about it, or avoiding it?" I turn and see Lachlan leaning against the wall behind me, arms crossed, watching me with his usual knowing look.
"I'm thinking," I say.
"Dangerous," he replies.
I huff a small laugh, my eyes drifting back to the water. "I've never…" I start, but trail off.
Lachlan tilts his head slightly. "You've never what?"
"Just…relaxed like this," I admit. The words feel small, but they carry the weight of every hour I spent being productive instead of present, every moment I was taught that stillness was laziness, that rest was failure.
They carry the weight of my father's voice—efficiency is discipline, discipline is respect—drilled so deep into my bones that the simple act of sitting in warm water feels like rebellion, like I'm breaking some fundamental rule about who I'm supposed to be.
These words are small, but they're heavy with everything I've denied myself.
With every night I didn't sleep in. Every meal I skipped to save money.
Every moment I moved through life like I was running from something instead of toward it.
And saying them out loud, admitting that I've never let myself just be—that feels like the heaviest thing I've ever said.
Lachlan doesn't respond right away, just steps closer. "Then you probably should," he says quietly.
By the time we step outside, the others are already there.
Finn is sitting right on the edge of the steaming tub, feet in the water, talking animatedly about something I can't quite catch.
Jonas and Adrian are in the water together, close enough that their shoulders nearly touch.
Adrian looks up the second I step out, and our eyes meet.
My breath catches, not with fear or panic, but something warm. Something that makes my stomach flip in a way I don't understand.
"Hey!" Finn says immediately, popping up like he has a radar for my existence.
The water is hotter than I expected. My breath catches as I step in slowly, the heat wrapping around me instantly, easing muscles I didn't even realize were tight. "Oh, this is nice."
Finn grins. "Told you."
I move carefully, lowering myself into the water until I'm sitting with the heat wrapping around my shoulders.
Finn is immediately beside me on one side, his energy bright and present.
On my other side, Lachlan settles in close, his solid warmth a grounding counterpoint to Finn's chaos.
Across from me, Jonas and Adrian sit near each other, their shoulders almost touching in the steaming water.
The proximity of them—the way Adrian's arm brushes against Jonas's as he shifts—sends a small flutter through my chest. I'm very aware of everything now.
Of how close they all are. Of how the water makes every small movement feel even more noticeable.
Of how Lachlan's thigh presses gently against mine beneath the surface.
Lachlan asks quietly, "Comfortable?"
I nod. "Extremely."
For a while, everything is easy. Conversation drifts nicely. Finn keeps things light, Jonas adds quiet commentary, Lachlan is steady in keeping everything grounded, and Adrian watches. But I can feel it. I'm aware of the pull. The way the space between us isn't really space at all.
A bubble of laughter escapes me when Finn says something ridiculous.
It feels good and real. When I lean back slightly, my shoulder brushes against something solid.
Lachlan. I still, just for a second, waiting.
Waiting for the instinct to pull away. Waiting for the voice in my head to tell me I'm doing something wrong, but nothing comes. Instead, Lachlan just shifts closer.
"You're thinking again," he murmurs.
I glance at him. "Am I that obvious?"
"Only to me," he says.
"That's concerning."
He smiles slightly, then adds, quieter now, "You're safe."
The words settle deep within me.
I nod. "I know." And I do.
My gaze drifts across the hot tub and lands on Adrian. He's already watching me. My stomach flips again. "You're staring," I say, before I can stop myself.
His brow lifts slightly. "So are you."
My cheeks warm instantly. "I…"
He interrupts me. "Come here." The words aren't sharp or demanding.
So I move slowly, carefully closing the distance between us.
The water shifts around me as I move, until I'm right in front of him, not touching, but close enough to feel the heat of him. Adrian's gaze softens slightly. "Better?" he asks quietly.
I nod, even though I'm not entirely sure what he means.
Finn leans back against the edge, watching us both with a grin he isn't even trying to hide. Lachlan and Jonas just watch.
I shift again, and this time, my knee brushes Adrian's under the water. It's accidental. Probably. But neither of us moves. The air shifts with something deeper, something heavier, something new.
"You okay?" he asks, quiet and low, just for me to hear.
I nod, even though my heart is racing now.
"Yeah." A beat. "I think so."
Adrian holds my gaze for another second, then, "Good."
I don't realize how close I've gotten until Finn leans forward, splashing water lightly toward both of us. "Okay," he says. "If you two get any more intense, I'm going to need snacks."
I laugh, and the tension is instantly broken. Air rushes back into my lungs.
Later, when we climb out, wrapped in towels and cool air, I realize something small but important. I never pulled away. Not once. Not from the closeness, not from the touches, not from them. And for the first time, this doesn't scare me. It feels like progress.