11. Caleb #2
“If this is supposed to be work related, then shouldn’t I know where we are going? Coworkers don’t keep secrets from each other. Plus, I hate surprises.”
“You’ll like this one, I promise.”
She eyes me suspiciously but doesn’t question it. Berry draws Marnie’s focus by nuzzling her leg, demanding attention. Marnie lets out a small laugh, obliging her request with some gentle ear rubs.
As we pick up speed and continue parallel with the coast, the wind continues to dishevel my hair, and I run my free hand through it several times, already feeling the ends starting to curl.
We pass several other boats, exchanging friendly waves, and I can’t help but sneak a glance at Marnie.
Her head is tilted back toward the sky, and she’s savoring the warmth of the sun on her face while the breeze plays with her hair, combing through each strand.
Her manicured nails casually scratch the top of Berry’s head.
Berry is quite content, eyes closed as she enjoys the sensation.
My heart melts at how relaxed she is with Marnie.
The sight before me is so wholesome that I almost drive right past the bridge a few minutes later.
I sharply cut the wheel to keep the boat in the proper depth between the two jetties, and I pray she doesn’t realize that I nearly missed the turn because I was staring at her. “Here we are. The famous Jaws Bridge.”
She turns her head and her mouth falls open slightly as she takes it in. “So, this was actually in the movie?”
“It’s changed a lot in fifty years, but this is it.” I shut off the engine as we approach the bridge. “My friends and I jump off the bridge every year on the first official day of summer. It’s kind of our summer tradition. We’ve done it every year since we were big enough to climb the railing.”
I point to the horizontal beams stretching all the way across the bridge that act as a ladder up to the top railing. The bridge sits roughly twenty feet above the surface of the water—tall enough for boats to pass underneath, but low enough for people to safely jump.
She studies it, cocking her head to the side and looking between the railing and the water. “People really jump off there?”
“All the time during the summer months. Though it’s not quite time for people to jump yet.”
“Is it safe?”
“It’s perfectly safe. People have been jumping off the bridge for decades. In early June, the sand below is dredged out to make it deeper and safer to jump. Just don’t jump alone or at night. The currents are no joke.”
She nods at that, but it’s prolonged, as if she’s unaware of her action.
Her back is still to me as she surveys the bridge, but her shoulders are stiff, almost on edge.
Like there’s a storm cloud above with a million thoughts running through her head that she can’t quite put a name to, and her body is bearing the weight of it all.
“What’s on your mind?” I pry.
“Food,” she answers frankly. On cue, a low rumble radiates from her stomach. “Guess I thought my breakfast would tide me over until afterward.”
“Well, you’re in luck,” I say, reaching over the wheel to open the small storage compartment behind it.
I pull out the large brown takeout bag and hand it to her.
Berry jumps down, knowing exactly what I have, and attempts to sniff the bag.
“I happened to grab some sandwiches at Nancy’s before you arrived. Take your pick.”
Marnie pulls out both containers and reads the labels printed on top. Her eyes dart back and forth a few times before selecting the grilled chicken, leaving the barbecue chicken for me.
I round the wheel and take a seat beside her at the bow, and we both dig into our sandwiches. In true Labrador fashion, Berry has found a spot to settle at our feet, in prime begging position for any leftover scraps, no longer interested in her dog bone now that human food is in play.
I toss her a single fry, which she catches with ease. Satisfied, she trots back over to the stern to resume chewing her bone.
“Now tell me what’s really on your mind,” I press again.
She stops eating but doesn’t answer me right away. There’s a long silence between us as she stares out at the water.
“I just . . .” she trails off, shoulders dropping as she turns toward me.
Before she can finish her sentence, her phone chimes. She glances down at the screen but doesn’t move to reply.
“Everything okay?” I inquire, my concern growing with each second that she doesn’t answer.
“Yeah, uh . . . it’s just my boss checking in.”
“Josie?”
“No, my boss back in Boston. Irene.”
There’s a tension spreading throughout her body and it shows with her posture.
The kind that comes from years of overthinking and self-doubt.
The kind that results from the weight of balancing expectations of others while not wanting to let them or yourself down.
I know that feeling all too well. It’s an awful burden to bear.
“This exhibit is important to me,” she says at last. “There’s so much riding on this.”
I don’t speak, giving her the time and space to get this off her chest.
“It’s a stepping stone in my professional career that will open up so many doors for me.” She casts her eyes down to the boat deck, voice growing smaller. “I can’t afford to mess this up. And I only have a few months to pull it off.” Her eyes find mine once more. “That’s what’s on my mind.”
“What makes you think you’re going to mess it up?”
She shrugs. “I don’t know. Irene is pretty strict with her exhibits.
Understandably so since it’s her name attached to them at the end of the day, but I’m here because of her, because I need to prove that I can handle the workload of planning an exhibit from start to finish.
Some days I feel like I’m in over my head, and that’s when the doubt creeps in about if I can really do this. ”
“And this one exhibit is going to determine your entire future?”
“Pretty much.”
“How’s that?”
“If this goes well, Irene is going to recommend me for a promotion at the Boston Historical Society.”
“So, all this trouble just for a job promotion?”
She looks at me, really looks at me, before responding. Like she’s debating how she wants to answer that. How real she wants to get.
“Have you ever worked so hard for something that you feel like you’ve almost lost yourself in the process?
That’s kind of how I’ve been feeling in recent months.
I’ve worked so hard for this. Beyond the metaphorical blood, sweat, and tears, I’ve given every piece of myself to this because I love what I do, but this field is so competitive.
I’m scared that it’s not going to pay off, and the outcome won’t be what I want.
That this was all for nothing. And I don’t know what I will do if that happens. ”
Her words bother me. They strike a nerve somewhere deep within.
Maybe it’s her tone. Maybe it’s the underlying meaning in the words, or the broken face that delivers them, but I decide in that moment that I’m going to do everything in my power to make sure she succeeds.
For her, I’ll do whatever it takes. I won’t let her down.
I won’t be the reason she doesn’t get this promotion.
In a way, we are both in the same boat, literally and figuratively. One last job working for my father, and one last job for her before she gets the promotion she’s been working for.
We finish the rest of our lunch in silence, the urge to comfort her eating at me. I reluctantly leave her sitting at the bow and start the engine back up. Not long after, we reach the halfway point in our journey, which happens to be the site of our second landmark.
We drift a bit closer to shore before I shift the boat into neutral and rejoin Marnie and Berry back up at the bow.
I point out to our left, and she follows the trajectory.
“That’s Chappaquiddick Island. Around the other side of Chappy is where they filmed a lot of the beach scenes, including the movie’s opening attack.
” I move my hand slightly to the right. “See that small boat that kind of looks like a giant piece of floating wood?”
“Mm-hmm,” she answers.
“That’s the ferry that goes over to Chappy. That’s the only way to get there from the main island. The scene where Chief Brody, the mayor, and medical examiner have a standoff about closing the beaches was filmed on that exact boat. It looks nearly identical today as it did in the movie.”
“Looks like I need a refresher on the movie details. I watched it when I got home from my first day before I started my proposal, but that was just to jog my memory since I was so unfamiliar with the island. I hadn’t seen it since I was a kid.”
“I have an idea.”
She glances over at me, a hopeful look in her eyes.
“Come see it at the movie theater. Now that you’ve visited some of these landmarks in real life, you’ll be able to recognize them in the movie and see how much they’ve changed over the years. Plus, you’ll catch more details watching it on the large theater screen than you would on your laptop.”
If she caught on to the flawed logic of that last argument, she didn’t comment. I was grateful for it.
I shift the boat out of neutral and begin the return trip back up the coast. We pull into the harbor slowly, taking extra care not to create a wake upon entry. I cut the wheel slightly ahead of the first row of boats and ease up to the pier.
After we reach the familiar posts marking my assigned spot, I toss a rope from the back of the boat onto the dock and walk up to the front to do the same. Berry wastes no time jumping over the side and onto the dock, retrieving the ropes for me to finish tying the boat up.
She drops the first one into my hand and then runs to retrieve the second. Her nails clack against the wooden dock as I get to work on the first knot.
Tying boat knots is practically second nature to me. Several of my classmates had their own small sailboats that we would take out on weekends as teenagers, and before my parents would let me go, my mom enrolled me in a course on boating basics at the local rec center.
I’ve tied thousands of cleat hitch knots and bowline knots since then.
My eyes drift over to Marnie, who’s watching attentively as my muscle memory takes over, working the rope over the cleat. It takes me less than five seconds, but the intensity in her gaze prolongs the moment.
I grin to myself, pleased to know that she was checking me out. “Can you grab the other rope from Berry?”
“Oh, um, yes,” she says, snapping out of her trance and turning to where Berry is sitting a few feet away, rope dangling out one side of her mouth. Berry eagerly drops it into Marnie’s waiting hand. “Here,” she says as she holds it out to me.
“Thanks. She gets impatient if I don’t grab it right away. I’m quick with the knots but not quick enough for Berry’s liking.”
She clears her throat. “Quick with knots, huh?” She arches a brow in my direction.
Her question catches me off guard and I fight the blush working its way up my neck. “Not like that.” I shake my head. A small smile spreads across my face when I look at her. “Unless you ask.”
This time it’s her who tries to resist blushing.
“Will you show me?”
I cough, completely caught off guard again. “I . . . uh . . .”
She huffs a laugh, clearly amused by my inability to form a coherent sentence. “Will you show me how to tie the boat off?” she finishes. “Get your mind out of the gutter, Caleb.”
“Oh, yeah. Here,” I gesture for her to take the rope.
She kneels next to me, and I adjust the slack in her hands, folding my fingers around hers as I start to work.
“This type of knot is a cleat hitch knot. Start with the rope here, then go around the far end of the cleat and wrap the rope around the base. Then bring it over the top of the cleat to make a figure eight going around the other end and bring it back up again.”
I start to gently ease my hands off hers, letting her take control while I still give her verbal instructions. “As you bring it back down this final time, make a loop with the rope instead and coil it around the end of the cleat opposite to the one you started, and tighten.”
My hand brushes hers, a zap of electricity coursing through me as I grab onto the rope next to her hand and give it a firm tug.
I hear her let out a small gasp, and I silently remind myself to remain focused.
“Once you’re done, here’s an easy way to remember if you did it correctly.
Bridge,” I say, running my other hand across the single top strand of rope, “over two rivers.” I repeat the motion with the two strands on the underside.
The knot is complete, but she stares down at where our hands still touch, neither of us wanting to release the rope and break the contact. She tentatively removes her hand, and I miss the warmth already.
She stands, patting her hands on her shorts. “I had a really nice time today . . . surprisingly.”
“I can’t believe you doubted me,” I feign dismay. “I think it’s more appalling that you doubted Berry.”
Berry’s ears perk at the mention of her name.
“Oh, I never doubted Berry. You on the other hand, I doubted very much.” Marnie crosses her arms and shifts her weight, like she’s debating something. “But in all seriousness, I had fun today.”
I smile up at her and then stand so I am at her side. “So did I.”
“So . . . can you send me the times that Jaws is playing at the theater? I think I can spare another afternoon. Strictly business, though.”
I offer a mock salute and promise to send her the list of screening options when I get home later.
Satisfied with that, she sets off down the dock, stopping to say goodbye to Berry before turning the corner and disappearing amongst Nancy’s incoming dinner rush.