CHAPTER 14
? ? ?
Kaleasha “Kales”
I had been at peace lately.
For the first time in a long time, my life didn’t feel like it was hanging on by a thread.
I was back in school, and this time I was doing it full-time.
Samir had told me I didn’t need to work, that I could just focus on finishing so I could get through it quicker and get on with my life the right way.
He made sure I had everything I needed.
Books. Gas. Food. Money in my account. Peace in my mind.
I still didn’t know how I fully felt about not working though.
I had always worked, even when Quay was taking care of everything.
I liked having my own little something. I liked being able to move when I wanted without feeling like I had to ask or explain.
But Samir understood that about me, and after we talked about it, I agreed to sit down for now with the promise that once I finished school, I could at least work part-time as a school nurse if I wanted to.
He had agreed without dragging it out.
That was one thing I had learned about Samir. He could be controlling as hell, but when it came to me, he listened too.
I was sitting at the table doing homework when Samir walked in. He came straight over and kissed the top of my head.
“How my girl doing?” he asked.
I smiled and looked up at him. “Tired of these notes already.”
He laughed low. “You almost done.”
“I know, but that don’t stop it from feeling like a lot.”
He pulled the chair out beside me and sat down, one arm draping across the back of my chair while he looked over the papers spread out in front of me.
“I still don’t know what the hell I’m looking at,” he said.
That made me laugh. “Then why you looking so hard?”
“Because it’s yours.”
Something about that simple answer made my chest warm.
That was how things had been with us lately. Calm. Easy. Steady.
Not perfect, because nothing about how we got here was perfect, but real in a way I had stopped expecting life to be.
A lot had changed these last few months.
Tariq was gone from the picture, and the truth had finally come out about what really happened to Markie.
Quay’s name had been cleared from that part, and while I was glad the truth was out, it still didn’t erase everything else.
It didn’t erase the hurt. It didn’t erase the lies.
It didn’t erase the version of me that had been left confused and broken, trying to hold onto a life that had already cracked apart.
So when people asked me how I felt about Quay not being the one who killed Markie, the truth was complicated.
I felt relieved. I felt sad. I felt sorry for everything that happened. But more than anything, I felt done.
Not bitter. Not angry in that sharp fresh way. Just done.
Some endings don’t come with fireworks. Sometimes they come with understanding. And understanding had finally settled in me.
I could love what me and Quay had once been and still know it had no place in my life anymore.
Samir reached over and slid my notebook a little farther from me. “Take a break.”
“I’m almost finished.”
“You been saying that for the last hour.”
I cut my eyes at him. “And you been hovering.”
“I’m not hovering.”
“You definitely hovering.”
That made him grin. “Aight, maybe a little.”
I leaned back in my chair and stretched. “You just got here. Why you already bothering me?”
He moved closer and rested his hand on my thigh under the table. “Because I missed you.”
I looked at him and rolled my eyes, but I was smiling. “Boy, you seen me this morning.”
“And?”
“That was only a few hours ago.”
He shrugged like that meant nothing. “Still missed you.”
The truth was, I liked hearing him say little stuff like that.
It wasn’t loud or flashy. He didn’t always come with a million words.
But when Samir felt something, I had learned that he showed it in steady ways.
Making sure I ate. Checking on me when he knew school had me stressed.
Keeping things off my back before I even had to mention them.
Letting me study in peace but still staying close enough that I could feel him there.
And after so much instability, that kind of consistency felt like love.
Real love.
He rubbed my thigh once before leaning in and kissing my cheek. “Come on. Leave that work alone for a minute.”
I turned my head and looked at him. “And do what?”
His eyes dropped to my mouth. “Spend time with me.”
That look alone made warmth spread through me.
I closed my notebook and pushed my papers into a stack. “You lucky I like you.”
“I know.”
“Your confidence is annoying.”
“And you still here.”
He had me there.
I let him pull me up from the chair, and the minute I stood, he wrapped his arms around my waist and pulled me close. I slid my arms around his neck and looked up at him.
“You okay?” he asked, and his voice had changed now, softer than before.
“Yeah,” I said. “Why?”
He searched my face for a second. “Because sometimes you get quiet when you thinking too much.”
That made me smile a little.
He knew me now. He really knew me.
“I was just thinking about how different my life is,” I admitted. “Not bad different. Just… different.”
His hands rested warm against my back. “You regret anything?”
I thought about that question for a second.
About Quay. About pain. About survival. About how ugly things had to get before my life finally slowed down enough for me to hear myself think.
Then I looked Samir in his eyes.
“No,” I said honestly. “Not anymore.”
Something in his face eased at that.
He leaned down and kissed me, and I kissed him back without hesitation.
There was no rush in it. No confusion. No guilt. Just warmth and certainty and the kind of comfort I had been too broken to even imagine not that long ago.
When he pulled back, his forehead rested against mine.
“I’m proud of you,” he said quietly.
My heart squeezed at that.
“For what?”
“For getting back to yourself.”
That almost made me emotional because deep down, I knew how close I had come to losing myself completely.
Not just in Quay. Not just in the chaos. But in everything that came after.
And somehow, somewhere in the middle of all of it, I had found my way back.
I smiled and kissed him one more time. “Thank you.”
He frowned a little. “For what?”
“For being good to me.”
His expression shifted, and the look he gave me was so serious it made my stomach flutter.
“That was always the plan,” he said.
I believed him.
And maybe that was the biggest difference between where I was now and where I used to be.
I was no longer forcing myself to believe in things that kept showing me they were unstable.
With Samir, I didn’t feel confused. I didn’t feel like I had to beg for truth. I didn’t feel like I was standing on shaky ground, hoping love would somehow make the cracks disappear.
I felt settled.
His hand came up and brushed a loose strand of hair away from my face before he kissed me again, slow and deep enough to make me forget all about the notes sitting on the table behind me.
I smiled against his mouth, and he pulled me even closer.
That little laugh that left me turned into a sigh when his lips moved from my mouth to my jaw, then lower to my neck.
“Samir,” I whispered, already knowing he was doing that on purpose.
“What?” he murmured against my skin.
“You trying to distract me.”
He lifted his head just enough to look at me. “And it’s working.”
I laughed softly and shook my head, but I didn’t move away.
I couldn’t, if I was being honest.
Not when his hands were holding me like that. Not when his mouth was on me like he had nowhere else to be. Not when peace had started feeling this good.
I let my hands slide down from around his neck to his chest, and for a second I just stood there, looking at him and letting myself really take in what my life had become.
It wasn’t the life I thought I was building before. But maybe that was the point.
Maybe the life I thought I wanted had to fall apart so I could find the one that was really for me.
Samir looked at me like he was waiting for whatever thought had just crossed my face.
I smiled.
“What?” he asked.
“Nothing,” I said, even though it wasn’t really nothing.
It was just that for the first time in a long time, I felt safe enough to imagine a future and not flinch.
And standing there in his arms, with my homework forgotten on the table and my heart finally at peace, I knew one thing for sure.
No matter how rough the road had been getting there, I had finally found a love that didn’t feel like it was trying to break me.