Chapter 28
Z oe opened her eyes and immediately felt Julie’s arms secured around her. She closed her eyes again, half-hoping this was a dream before realising what it meant.
Shit.
She’d promised herself nothing stupid would happen with Julie.
But they’d gone there and beyond. And yet, Julie’s soft skin against hers made her want to stay exactly like this forever.
She couldn’t stay here, she had to go and put as much space as possible between them.
There were only two days left for her to survive in Belgium.
Then she could go back to London and try to fix this mess.
Zoe tried to extract herself from bed, slowly lifting Julie’s arms away.
“Hmm.” Julie mumbled, still asleep. “No, stay.” She tightened her grip against Zoe.
She felt Julie’s knee nestling its way between her legs and settling there.
Zoe pushed her aside and jumped out of bed before it escalated into something else.
She’d forgotten that she was still completely naked and started looking for her clothes from the night before, scattered all across Julie’s floor.
A loud knock came at the door.
Julie sprang up and looked at Zoe, absolute terror in her eyes. She was instantly wide awake.
“Julie? Are you awake?” It was Alice’s voice. “The hairdresser is here.”
“Fuck.” Julie whispered. She looked around the room. “The bathroom. Go in the bathroom.” She sprung out of bed and put her pyjamas on like her life depended on it. “Coming!”
Zoe felt her heart stop. She was still half-naked, trying to pick up her stuff as quickly as possible.
She ran to the bathroom and closed the door, her face felt white as a sheet.
She quickly finished dressing while she overheard Julie telling Alice that she had a small alarm clock problem.
Zoe stopped moving until she heard Alice walking away and the door closing. She swallowed.
The bathroom door opened slowly.
“Zoe? Are you dressed?” Julie asked as if they hadn’t just spent the night wrapped around each other.
“I am.” Was any of it worth it? Zoe was starting to regret everything.
Julie walked into the bathroom. “Sorry, I think you have to go, I gotta get ready and go downstairs and-”
“Yes, don’t worry. I also have to be downstairs, my team must be wondering where I am.” Zoe sighed. “I can’t believe we’re late, why didn’t we set an alarm or something?”
Julie grinned. “Well, now you know why I’m always late everywhere.” She quickly realised the poor timing of her joke.
Zoe didn’t want to laugh either.
“Zo, this has to stay between us. We can’t ruin Yasmine’s wedding because we’re idiots.” Julie sighed. “I know this is insane and I can’t believe it’s coming from me but we have to act like nothing happened.” She exhaled.
“We’ve got this. We can deal with this later.” Zoe had no idea what ‘later’ meant and how they would deal with this. There was no coming back from whatever had happened.
“OK, now go.” Julie turned around and opened the front door to look into the corridor before slightly closing it again. She looked at Zoe. “The coast is clear.”
Zoe swiftly walked out of the bathroom and hesitated as she walked past Julie. It felt a bit weird to just… leave? But she wasn’t going to kiss Julie goodbye, was she? She smiled and awkwardly waved at her before going full speed into her own room.
Zoe closed the door and leaned her back against it for a minute.
There was no time to be dramatic about last night.
About the fact that she’d slept with Julie.
That she had had sex with another woman.
When she was engaged and about to marry a man.
Zoe tried to put the thought aside as she got into her own bathroom to get ready.
The warm water of a morning shower didn’t help her wash off the smell of Julie.
Nor her touch. Everything was stained with Julie.
Zoe put on her dark green short-sleeved cocktail dress - one that Nicki had picked out for her - and as she zipped it, she could only imagine Julie unzipping it in a firm gesture.
She put lipstick on and could only imagine Julie kissing it all off again.
Zoe sat down on her bed, feeling powerless.
There was no Nicki nor Tom to help her deal with this today, she had to do it by herself. This was her own personal mess.
Zoe walked downstairs, trying to remember what was supposed to be done today. Her chefs were already at it in the kitchen.
“ Goeiemorgen. We started the breakfast buffet already since you weren’t there.” One of them said coarsely, but Zoe couldn’t be upset. She’d also messed up professionally by not showing up for the morning team briefing.
“I’m sorry. I had some… personal issues to deal with. Things should go as planned. I will check in with the bride to see if there are any changes.”
“Great. By the way, champagne was delivered this morning right on schedule.”
“OK, thanks.” Zoe nodded, left the kitchen and went looking for Yasmine. She had to focus on what needed to be done, but she had no idea what she had to do any more.
All she could see was Tom’s face when she would tell him what happened.
The disappointment in his face, the betrayal.
How could she? Why did she do that? Zoe had no answers to give him.
She didn’t even have any for herself. She was in front of the door of Yasmine’s room before she realised it.
The door abruptly opened and a middle-aged woman with a huge camera around her neck and another one in her hand rushed out - the photographer, Zoe thought.
“She just needs a bit of time.” She smiled apologetically at Zoe. Zoe smiled back at her and waited for the lady to disappear downstairs before she knocked. She didn’t really understand what the photographer meant. Her head was miles away today.
Some shuffling happened inside but nobody answered.
Zoe knocked again.
The door opened. It was Leila, looking stricken.
“Hi Leila, I’m just checking with Yasmine to see if there are any changes or requests regarding catering.”
Leila shook her head. “We’re a bit in a… a crisis of sorts.”
“A crisis?” Zoe’s heart jumped. Was it because of Julie and her? Did Yasmine find out the selfish reason why her two best friends were late on her big day?
“Come in.” Leila ushered her into the room before closing the door quickly behind her.
Yasmine was sitting on her bed, dressed in a stunning white wedding gown with gorgeous lace work, surrounded by her bridesmaids.
Julie had her arm around her. Maria and Alice were patting her on the knee. Yasmine was sobbing.
“I can’t do it.”
“It’s just nerves, Yas. You’re gonna be alright. We’re all here for you.” Julie said confidently.
Zoe turned to Leila. “What’s going on?”
“I don’t know. We were putting her shoes on when suddenly she burst into tears.”
Zoe moved slowly towards the bed. “What’s going on, Yas?”
“Oh Zoe. You’re here too. I’m so embarrassed… Is everyone really seeing me like this?” Yasmine sniffled.
“I’ve seen you in a worse state. Remember when that guy dumped you over text?” Zoe smiled, trying to cheer Yasmine up but it didn’t work. Zoe hesitated, then crouched down next to the bed and took Yasmine’s hand.
“Is it…” Zoe felt a knot in her throat. She took a breath. “Is it the wedding?” She paused. “Is it Adam?”
Yasmine looked at her. She nodded.
“Are you…” Zoe stuttered. “Are you having second thoughts?” She lightly pressed on Yasmine’s hand. Yasmine held onto her hand tighter. She was sobbing uncontrollably.
“Do you want to tell me what’s going on?”
“There’s nothing to say. I just don’t know. I don’t know if this is a good idea.”
“It’s alright.” She patted Yasmine’s hand. “We all have wedding jitters. It happens.” Zoe could feel Julie’s gaze burning through her skull. “But we’re here today to celebrate Adam and you. You’ve made it that far, it must mean something, right?”
Yasmine weakly nodded.
“Couples all have ups and downs. It doesn’t have to be perfect all the time.” Zoe felt the irony of her words weighing down on her. She was avoiding Julie’s look at all costs. “Because in the end, you’re still choosing to be with him.”
It was enough for Yasmine, at least. She wiped her eyes and nodded at Zoe again.
“You’re right. I just need… I think I need some time alone.”
“Are you sure?” Maria asked.
“Yes. I just need to get myself together and then it will be fine. And… maybe you could ask the makeup artist to come back in?” Yasmine smiled faintly.
“OK, we’ll leave you be. Call us if you need us?”
“Sure.”
Julie looked hesitant to leave but stood up as soon as everyone else started to move.
“I’ll meet you girls downstairs for the pictures.” Yasmine herded them out of her room, smiling with her eyes red. She quietly closed the door behind her bridesmaids.
All the girls were gathered in front of Yasmine’s door.
“I hope that whatever is going on, she’s going to be fine.” Leila grimaced. “I’m pretty sure it’s the treasure hunt and the documentary that are still bothering her.”
Zoe suddenly remembered that unfinished conversation Yasmine and her had when they left the garden to start the treasure hunt.
Maybe Yasmine had really had second thoughts for quite some time and it was all coming crashing down now.
What was it that Julie said again? That Adam made Yasmine unhappy more often than not?
Was it the same thing for Zoe? Did Tom make her happy?
“She’s probably fine.” Julie scratched her head. “I guess this is why you have bridesmaids at your wedding.”
Julie’s voice made Zoe snap out of her thoughts. She had to stop obsessing about Tom and the mayhem that was her relationship for today. It was Yasmine’s day, she had to only focus on her.
“I should probably go back to the kitchen. Everybody is going to be there soon.” Zoe slowly walked away.
“Yes, good plan. Bye, Zoe! See you later!” Julie smiled and waved at her. It seemed forced.
Zoe knew that she was trying to act like nothing had happened between them but it made everything more suspicious.
The best would be to avoid Julie today, Zoe thought as she was walking down the stairs.
She seemed too nervous and there was a substantial risk that Julie would accidentally spill the beans.
* * *
Yasmine resurfaced sooner than expected, looking absolutely flawless.
The makeup artist had apparently performed some kind of sorcery, as not a single trace of her red and puffy eyes was apparent.
Her chignon didn’t have a hair out of place, and she looked timelessly elegant in her designer dress with its endless lace train.
The photographer gathered the girls together, and Zoe and the bridesmaids took many pictures around the house and in the yard before Adam’s arrival.
It was very fun and light, just what everyone needed today.
Zoe felt silly, but she almost wanted to pick each and every one of Yasmine’s bridesmaids to be her own bridesmaids at her wedding.
Julie’s phone buzzed, and she read the message with a small smile.
“Time to get out of here, Yas! Adam’s on his way!” Yasmine shrieked and laughed as they bundled her back upstairs and into the bridal suite, far away from Adam’s eyes.