Chapter 20 #2
“A joke.” Todd sat back in his chair and popped up the footrest. “I lived in L.A. briefly in my early twenties—long enough to know it wasn’t for me. Some of my friends were actors. That is to say, they were tour guides or bartenders.”
Lana pulled out soup bowls, keeping an eye on her father.
Griffin flipped up his own footrest. “I’m fortunate enough to be able to act full-time.”
“So you’re making a living from it, or…?”
“Dad! Griffin is one of the—”
“It’s okay, Lana.” Griffin gave her a pointed look. He was trying hard not to smile.
“Sweetheart, I’m just relating to the hustle. I’m an artist, a landscape painter,” Todd explained to Griffin. “Which means most of my income comes from odd jobs around town, selling bread and veggies at the Saturday market, and teaching art classes at the community hall.”
“So far, I’ve managed to get regular work. I still live with my parents though—just makes a lot of sense.”
Todd wriggled to get comfortable, never one to squander an opportunity to share wisdom.
“The advice I give young people in my art classes? Learn a trade. Practical skills are always in demand—building, electrical, plumbing. People will always need houses, and those houses will need maintenance. Get a day job and pursue arts as a hobby, not a career. Don’t let the need to make money kill your love for your art.
But it does sound like you’ve been relatively lucky … so far.”
“Sound advice, Mr. Fleming. If the acting gigs dry up, I will definitely consider that.”
“How about getting that dill, Todd?” Lana’s mom called. “And parsley, while you’re at it?”
As her father headed outside, Lana drifted over to Griffin, shaking her head. He grabbed her hand and pulled her close. She knew it was so he could speak without her mother overhearing, but it warmed her up all the same.
“Do you know how many times in my life I’ve met people with no preconceived ideas about me?” he whispered.
“Oh, he has preconceived ideas, just wildly wrong ones.”
“Most people’s preconceptions are wrong. I like these wrong ones better. It’s like I’m this unsuitable guy their daughter has brought home.”
“Even they can’t stay in the dark forever.” Forever? That made it sound like she and Griffin really were dating.
“How are you feeling—about the other stuff?”
Lana glanced over her shoulder. Her mom seemed oblivious of the conversation—and not just acting oblivious. “So many things in the last few days haven’t felt real. This is just one more. I feel like none of this will sink in until I find Vivien.”
Lana’s dad returned and she dropped Griffin’s hand. Best not get her parents’ hopes up.
As they ate, her parents talked about their family’s early years—part confession, part reminiscence.
They brought out photos, including a stack Lana had never seen of Brenda with her and Vivien.
It began to rain, first a patter and then fat splats.
Dawn especially seemed relieved to release the secrets, though Lana’s capacity to take in new information had maxed out some hours ago.
If only she could shut herself in a room for a few days—an escape room but it only unlocked once she’d processed the fact that her life was not what she thought.
And yet nothing had changed. She was sitting here with her parents in her childhood home—and they were her parents, even if her parentage had changed.
Though there was a Hollywood star sitting next to her, acting very much like a charming, supportive boyfriend—that was different.
It was still raining when it came time to leave.
Todd suggested Griffin bring the car up to the house, and “to heck with the rules” about no visitor cars on-site.
He forced a large box of produce onto them, setting it down on the porch with a self-satisfied flourish.
“I know how every little bit helps,” he said.
“All organic, of course. We grow more than we can eat for this very reason.”
“There is no saying no,” Lana said to Griffin in a stage whisper. “They will sneak it into the trunk.”
“Thank you.” Griffin beamed with genuine delight. “I have recipes that’ll be perfect with these.”
“You might have to pay extra to take the box on the plane.” Todd pulled out his wallet, but Griffin swiftly reassured him he could cover it.
As Griffin ran off under an umbrella, Lana’s mom linked arms with her. “Honey, I’m so sorry you found out like this. I’ve wanted to tell you for so long. But I’m glad you know. And I know I didn’t give birth to you but—”
“Oh, Mom.” Lana lost the ability to talk. Instead, she hugged her mom tightly.
“I wish Vivi was here,” Dawn said when they pulled apart. “Do you think we should come down to help?”
“I don’t think there’s much you can do. And there’s still a chance she’ll show up here.” Even as she said it, Lana realized she no longer felt it. Vivien’s presence was fading from the world.
“I’m going to get a cell phone,” her father announced. “You need to be able to reach us. I’ve felt so disconnected from you—ever since you girls moved, but definitely now.”
“Dad—this is big.”
“Doesn’t have to be forever, but at least while all this is happening. I can get Mike who runs the café to show me how to work it.”
“Mike knows how to use a cell phone?”
Dawn rubbed Lana’s back. “Don’t tell the others, but he got one when his daughter was expecting, so she could send him baby pictures. He only checks it in town, where there’s scratchy coverage, so it’s not quite cheating.”
“So,” Todd said, loading a lot of meaning into a short word. “Griffin seems great.”
“He does. We’re not together, if that’s what you’re thinking.”
“Are you sure?” her mom said. “Certainly seems like a spark there—the way he looks at you… And he came all this way—a grueling trip like that! Men don’t do that kind of thing unless they’re committed.”
“Believe me, he’s not.”
Todd put a hand on Lana’s shoulder. “Just … be careful. He seems like a good guy, and I grant you that he is extremely good-looking in a conventional way, if you’re into that kind of thing, but an artist’s life isn’t the most stable, not just financially but also in terms of self-esteem.
He’ll likely spend his best years chasing an impossible dream, and at some point the moment will come where the dream fades.
That’s hard to cope with, for the dreamer and their partner.
He’ll be looking at your steady paycheck and thinking that makes you a good prospect. ”
Dawn pulled an errant section of Lana’s hair into place. “Even so, I would rather travel through life with a creative soul than one who sees the world in black and white.”
“I’m just pointing that out because I know stability is important to Lana. Not to mention that charm can mask a certain narcissism.”
Lana mentally rolled her eyes. “You two, of all people, should know to judge a prospective partner on how well he treats me, not how much money he has.”
Her father tilted his head. “Prospective partner, now?”
“A hypothetical, obviously.”
Her parents murmured doubtful assents, as Griffin pulled up in the car.
“Dad, did you give up your dream of making it as an artist when Vivien and I landed on you?”
“That wasn’t what I meant.”
“That’s not an answer.”
“Sweetheart, I wouldn’t change a single thing. You are the impossible dream, you and Vivi.” They group-hugged, but Lana sensed they were all thinking the same thing—someone was missing.
Lana picked up the box of produce. “Dad, next time you see Mike, get him to google Griffin Hart—H.A.R.T. Just for fun.”
As they drove away, Griffin was still grinning.
“I take it you enjoyed your afternoon as a regular guy?” Lana said.
“Like a fantasy. I could be myself—when I wasn’t pretending to be the grifter your dad thinks I am.” He looked at her for so long she was about to remind him to keep his eyes on the path before he took out someone’s compost bin. “I love that you treat me like a regular guy.”
Lana tried her very best not to fixate on the use of “love” and “you” in the same sentence. “I’m not sure I do. Letting you in on a secret here, but I’ve been hyperaware of who you are all along.”
“I suppose they’ll have figured it out, next time I see them,” he said, sounding disappointed.
Just as Lana’s brain latched onto the news that he expected to see her parents again, he clarified.
“I mean, if they come to L.A. when we find Vivien. But maybe they won’t approve of me once they know, given their experience with Walter Shepherd. ”
“Oh, I think they’ll approve—I’m a nepo baby too, after all. My parents always said my college fund was a legacy from my aunt.” Lana watched the cedar trunks flash past her window. “I kind of want another conversation with Walter, not that he’ll agree to talk a second time.”
“Let’s figure out a way.”
Lana bit her bottom lip. “What if we never find Vivien? What if she becomes one of the permanently missing?”
“Maybe don’t worry about that unless it happens?”
“But that’s the thing—what’s the point at which it happens, at which you know it’s happened? Maybe it’s already happened?”
“Darnell seems to think this latest discovery is significant. Let’s find out what it is before we lose hope.”
We. Griffin said that word a lot. We’re in this together. But for how long? Like with the moment Vivien’s disappearance became permanent, at what point did she and Griffin determine that the mission was over, and return to their very separate lives?
Lana dreaded both moments with her entire being.