A Woman’s Responsibility
Chapter thirty-five
A Woman’s Responsibility
Christopher had only been gone two days and already Juliet missed him.
She missed the way he looked at her, his warm brown eyes tracing the lines of her face, easily understanding everything that went through her head.
She missed the way he smiled at her, as though delighted with every second they had together.
She missed the feel of him, the soft way he would trace his fingertips along the line of her jaw, the urgency with which he pulled her into his arms, and the tender and yet passionate way he kissed her at every possible opportunity.
Juliet sighed longingly, all but counting the days until he would return.
With their son.
A slight tremble went through Juliet at the thought of little Sebastian. She longed to see him, to look into his eyes, and yet she could not help but worry: would he like her? Would he even want her to be his mother?
Wringing her hands, Juliet closed her eyes, trying her best to picture the little boy.
Did he look like Christopher? Did he have brown eyes?
What would it feel like to look into his eyes and know that they were his mother’s?
To see the woman who had given him life in his face whenever Juliet would gaze upon him?
Standing by the drawing room windows, Juliet inhaled a deep breath, then leaned her head against the cool windowpane. Oh, how she hated waiting! If only the days would pass quicker!
Yet there was something she still needed to do. Right now, Juliet’s emotions were still a bit too raw. However, she knew she could not hesitate too long. She needed to go to Fartherington Hall and speak to Christopher’s mother before his return.
Frowning, Juliet stilled when the sound of carriage wheels suddenly drifted to her ears.
It could not be her siblings departing; indeed, they had all decided to remain at Whickerton Grove a while longer—to meet little Bash and, eventually, see Juliet and Christopher married.
In fact, this was not a carriage departing, was it?
Instead, it sounded like one arriving. Lifting her head, Juliet looked out the window, and the breath lodged in her throat when she saw the Lockhart coat-of-arms upon the carriage that arrived.
“Christopher?” Juliet whispered, but then quickly shook her head. No, it could not be him. He was on his way to Ireland. Then who? It could not possibly be his mother, could it?
Trying to swallow the lump in her throat, Juliet hastened out into the hall, quick steps carrying her toward the front door. However, the moment it opened, she saw it was not Christopher’s mother stepping over the threshold but Nora instead.
“Nora?” Juliet exclaimed with a frown as her eyes fell upon her old friend. Of course, Leo had been the one closest to Christopher’s sister as they were of the same age; however, more than one summer had been spent in blissful companionship, all of them together.
Hearing her name called, Nora almost flinched.
Her eyes widened, and the distracted look disappeared from her face.
“Jules!” The word rushed from her lips in one quick breath, and her left hand fluttered to her chest as though seeking to calm her heart.
“Oh, you surprised me,” Nora said then, a tentative smile coming to her face that seemed not quite genuine.
“Of course, I shouldn’t have been. After all, I’m the one coming to your home.
” She chuckled distractedly, closing and opening her eyes and then shaking her head.
Her lady’s maid remained by the door, maintaining a respectful distance.
Juliet frowned. “Are you all right? What brings you here today?” Juliet could not shake the feeling that something was wrong.
For a long moment, Nora simply looked at her, her mouth opening and closing a few times, as though she wished to speak but did not know how to find the words.
“Is it about Christopher?” Juliet asked, concerned that something might have happened. “He said he wanted to speak to his mother before leaving for Ireland. Did he?” She wrung her hands.
Nora nodded. “He did.” A proud smile touched her lips. “He told her off. I’ve never seen him like that.” Her left hand reached out to grasp Juliet’s. “You’ve made him very happy. Thank you.”
Smiling with relief, Juliet nodded. “He has made me very happy as well.” And then she noticed that Nora’s right hand was clenched around what seemed to be a letter that she held pressed to her heart.
Juliet’s heart skipped a beat. A letter? It couldn’t possibly be—?
“Is…Is your brother here?” Nora asked in a trembling voice, and her hand tightened upon the parchment clenched in her fist.
Stunned, Juliet nodded. “He’s in the study,” she told Nora, wishing she knew what was going on or what had happened. Clearly, Christopher had finally delivered the letter Troy had handed him all these years ago. Did Troy know? “You still know your way around, do you not?”
Nora nodded, a grateful look coming to her eyes. “Yes, I believe I do.” Her gaze swept over the large foyer, and a bit of a wistful smile came to her face. “It has been some time, but I remember this place well.”
Watching Nora walk away, her lady’s maid following at her heels, Juliet clasped her hands together, hoping with every fiber of her being that somehow Nora and Troy would find their own happily ever after.
Not that Juliet had already found hers. Of course, before she could consider herself that happy, there was more to be done. Still, it was within reach.
Close.
So close.
Turning on her heel, Juliet hurried in the opposite direction and headed toward the library, knowing that her grandmother liked to sit there and rest this time of day.
She did not wish to wait any longer. She needed to speak to Christopher’s mother soon.
Before, however, she thought it would be wise to ask for counsel from a woman who seemed to possess wisdom in spades.
“Is she here?” came Grandma Edie’s voice the moment Juliet stepped into the library. Seated near the enormous fireplace, with a blanket tucked around her legs, the old woman looked far from old and fragile, something formidable and dauntless shining in those pale eyes of hers.
Juliet momentarily paused in her step. “Who?”
Grandma Edie chuckled. “Our dear Nora, of course.”
Closing her eyes in disbelief, Juliet sank into a chair across from her grandmother. “How can you possibly know it is her? These windows do not allow for a look of the drive. How did you know?”
Grandma Edie merely shrugged. “Why have you come? Clearly, there is something on your mind. Out with it.”
Knowing she would never extract information from her grandmother that the woman did not wish to share, Juliet sighed and settled more comfortably in her chair. “Very well. I came here to ask for your advice.”
“That is obvious,” her grandmother chuckled deviously. “Advice on what, however?”
After Christopher’s departure, Juliet had sat down with her family and explained to them all what had happened six years ago, why Christopher had left and what had kept him away.
She had told them about the little boy in Ireland, who was to be her son, and she had told them how nervous she was about being a mother.
“Oh, don’t worry,” Christina had counseled, wrapping an arm around Juliet’s shoulders. “The moment he smiles at you, you’ll be lost.” She looked across the room at her husband, who nodded in agreement. They had both lost their hearts to a little girl who was not their flesh and blood.
And yet, little Samantha was as much a part of them all as she possibly could have been.
Juliet knew that. She loved the little girl with all her heart.
But Samantha was her niece, while Sebastian would be her son.
Would it be different then? Christina assured her it would not, admitting to having had the same doubts upon first finding herself a mother so unexpectedly.
Juliet’s own mother and father had nodded encouragingly.
“Children are so easy to love,” her mother had murmured with tears in her eyes.
“You know this little boy is yours, and the moment you see him, you’ll feel it.
Trust me.” She had looked up at her husband, his eyes misted with tears as well, as he had smiled at her.
Meeting her grandmother’s gaze, Juliet inhaled a steadying breath. “I am determined to go and speak to Christopher’s mother.”
“About?” Grandma Edie urged; yet Juliet could not shake the feeling that once again the woman knew.
Juliet sighed, remembering the many times throughout their childhood she had seen a deeply disheartened look on Christopher’s face.
“It hurt Christopher to be rejected by her, by them both.” She shook her head.
“I cannot leave it at that. She needs to know what she did to him. Not only for…for our son’s sake, but for Christopher’s as well.
” She leaned forward, looking into her grandmother’s eyes.
“He puts on a brave face, but I can see how much it still pains him. Even if he’s not aware of it, he believes himself unworthy of love.
I can see it in his eyes. He doubts me. He doubts my love, afraid one day I’ll…
come to my senses and take it away.” She scoffed at the ludicrous thought.
“Somehow, he needs to make his peace with the past or it will forever overshadow his future. Our future.”
Grandma Edie nodded. “What will you say to her?”
Juliet threw up her hands. “I don’t know. That is precisely why I’m here.” She cast her grandmother a tentative smile. “Any advice?”
A thoughtful look came to Grandma Edie’s face before she finally nodded, as though having made a decision. “Nothing happens without reason,” she finally said, her voice oddly serious, even laced with a bit of anger. “We may not be aware of it, but it is there, nonetheless.”
Juliet frowned. “What are you saying? I should…uncover the reason for his mother’s, his parents’ rejection?”
Grandma Edie nodded. “Did you never wonder why they only singled out him? Not Sebastian or Nora but him?”
“Of course, I did,” Juliet replied, remembering the many times she had done her utmost to contain the damage his parents’ words had caused.
“As did Christopher. Countless times I heard him ask himself that question, what he could have possibly done or said to disappoint them.” She threw up her hands. “Even as a child, he blamed himself.”
Grandma Edie’s lips thinned. “You know as well as I do it was not his fault. He did nothing.” Her weathered hand tightened upon the armrest of her chair, and Juliet was surprised to see such anger in her kind, old grandmother.
It passed quickly, though, and soon, that shrewd look was back in the old woman’s eyes.
“What reason could there be?” Juliet wondered out loud. “I know some parents care very little for their children, only seeing the next in line, an heir to carry on the family name. Yet…”
“Yet they treated Sebastian and Nora differently, did they not?”
Juliet nodded. “Why?” She frowned. “Do you know?”
Grandma Edie shook her head. “I’m afraid not. However, the way they always looked at him does not stem from nothing. There is a reason, one you must uncover, one his mother must admit to if you hope to give Christopher any peace of mind.”
Juliet closed her eyes and exhaled loudly. “I don’t know if I can do that,” she whispered, then she looked at her grandmother again. “I’m not like you…or Harriet or Louisa. I’m not brave. I’m not—”
Leaning forward, Grandma Edie grasped her hand, a warm smile upon her face. “Do not tell yourself lies, sweet child. We all are brave in our own ways. You can do this. I have every faith that you can. For yourself as well as for your family. Protect them. They need you to.”
With tears in her eyes, Juliet nodded, her own hand tightening on her grandmother’s.
“Thank you.” Perhaps her grandmother was right.
Perhaps she could be strong. Strong enough to confront her future mother-in-law, a woman who knew how to put others in their place, how to look at them in a way that made one want to sink into a hole in the ground.
Yet, Juliet could all but feel something deep inside her grow stronger. Protect them, her grandmother had said.
And she would.