A Dark Secret #2
“Christopher,” Juliet clarified, for the look in Lady Lockhart’s eyes made her wonder if the woman had even heard her, “why can you not love him? You’ve always treated him differently.
It is not as though you and your late husband were not the kind of people to bestow love on their children.
You did on Sebastian and Nora. But not Christopher, why? ”
Lady Lockhart’s eyes closed, and she hung her head, as though a weight that had been resting upon her for years had now finally become too much to bear.
“He blames himself,” Juliet continued, wondering what it would take for the woman to finally understand what she had done to her son.
“For as long as I have known him, he has been trying time and time again to please you, to gain your love and respect.” Sighing, she shook her head.
“Yet he never could. Why? I know it was nothing he did or said. It couldn’t have been.
” She reached out and placed her hands upon Lady Lockhart’s.
They were ice-cold. “Please, tell me why you could not love him, why you cannot open your heart to his son now.”
Tears fell from Lady Lockhart’s eyes onto Juliet’s hands; yet no sound emerged from the woman’s lips.
A sudden thought flashed through Juliet’s mind, and without thinking, she spoke it out loud, “Is he not yours?” Lady Lockhart’s head snapped up, wide eyes staring into Juliet’s. “Is Christopher not your son?”
Slowly, that sense of detachedness fell from Lady Lockhart’s face, and she licked her lips. “He…He…” Her voice was only a whisper, hoarse and burdened. “He…He is my son,” she swallowed, “but my husband was not his father.”
“What?” Juliet’s eyes went wide. That she had not expected. “Lord Lockhart was not…” She shook her head, unable to make sense of everything.
The expression upon Lady Lockhart’s face grew less rigid.
Where before there had been stoic determination, like a wall erected to keep others out and her secret safely concealed, there now was a crack in her defenses.
And slowly, with each breath she took, that crack grew wider, allowing Juliet a clearer view of the woman she had known almost all her life.
Indeed, Lady Lockhart had always possessed a rather stern expression, something unapproachable in the way she looked at those around her. Yet suddenly, the look in her eyes spoke neither of indifference nor disapproval but of pain instead.
“Tell me what happened,” Juliet urged gently, wondering for how long her future mother-in-law had been keeping this secret.
“Did your husband know?” The moment the words left her lips, Juliet knew the answer.
Of course, he had known, for he, too, had always treated Christopher… as though he were not his.
Yes, it all made sense now, and Juliet wondered how she had not seen it before.
Lady Lockhart’s eyes closed, and she nodded. “Yes, he did. He always knew.”
Juliet felt a shudder go through her, for the look upon the other woman’s face led her to believe that Lady Lockhart had not merely…
had an affair. No, the anguish in the woman’s eyes spoke of someone who had suffered…
greatly. In fact, it reminded her of the pain Juliet had occasionally glimpsed in Leonora’s eyes after the attack on her.
“What happened?” Juliet urged once more, uncertain if she truly wanted to know.
Yet, for Christopher’s sake, she needed to.
Lady Lockhart lowered her head, and Juliet felt the woman’s hands shiver below her own.
“I don’t know if you knew,” she whispered, her voice wistful, “but long ago, my husband and I were very much in love.” The ghost of a smile flitted over her face as her mind drifted back to times long gone.
“And then everything changed.” Her jaw clenched, and she inhaled a deep breath, then slowly released it.
“We had just become parents, and when Sebastian was barely two years old, we decided to spend some time in a remote cabin. It was supposed to be only the three of us. No servants. No meddling parents. No one but us. We wanted time alone, and my husband had always loved the outdoors, hunting and hiking.” She blinked and then looked up, tear-misted eyes meeting Juliet’s.
“We thought it was a good idea. We thought…”
Juliet felt every fiber of her being tense, for the look in Lady Lockhart’s eyes broke her heart. Once, she, too, had been a young woman in love, full of hope and dreams for the future. And then life had taken an awful turn.
“One night,” Lady Lockhart continued as her hands squeezed Juliet’s painfully, “a…a group of highwaymen happened upon the cabin.” Her eyes closed, and Juliet could see the reluctance to speak upon her face.
“Before we knew what was happening, we had pistols pointed at our heads. They ransacked the cabin, gathered whatever valuables they could find.” She shook her head.
“Of course, there wasn’t much, and they soon became angry.
They started yelling at my husband. They struck him.
” She flinched at the memory. “And then they…looked at me.”
A sickening sensation rolled through Juliet, and she closed her eyes, praying it would shut out the images that formed in her mind. “You don’t have to—” she began, but Lady Lockhart did not hear her.
“My husband tried to protect me,” she went on, her gaze distant, fixed on something on the other side of the room.
“They shot him. At first, I thought he was dead, but then I heard him moan. Fortunately, the bullet had only hit him in the shoulder. I heard my son crying.” She cringed.
“I will never forget his wails as he called out for us, and…and we couldn’t go to him. ”
Her eyes closed once more, and she bowed her head in defeat.
“After that, I did not fight them any longer. I simply closed my eyes and waited for it to be over.” Frowning, she shook her head.
“I think I might have passed out at some point because I remember coming to and realizing that they were gone. My son was still screaming. and my husband was slowly bleeding-out, and so I had to…” Her eyes rose and met Juliet’s.
“I had to…see to them. I had to be strong. I had to…” Her jaw trembled. “I couldn’t… I had to be strong.”
Juliet nodded, tears rolling down her cheeks as she held her future mother-in-law’s hands tightly within her own. “You protected them as best as you could.”
Lady Lockhart nodded, the look upon her face still oddly distant. “I did,” she mumbled. “I did try.”
“Were they caught?” Juliet asked to fill the silence that slowly spread between them like a black void.
Her future mother-in-law nodded. “They were caught, and they were hanged for their crimes.” Something hard came to her jaw, tensing her muscles.
“You never told anyone what happened to you, did you?” Juliet asked softly. “They…They were hanged for what they had done to your husband, but…”
“I knew if I…admitted to what had truly happened, it would ruin my family.” Tears stood in her eyes as she looked up at Juliet.
“Yet I wanted to. I…” She swallowed hard.
“People called me fortunate to have escaped without a scratch. They called my husband brave, and his wound was like a badge of honor. I remember that for a long time, I was never quite certain if I was truly awake. Nothing seemed to make sense. Everything felt…wrong.”
Juliet could not imagine what Lady Lockhart had gone through. “Did your husband blame you?”
Lady Lockhart’s head snapped up, and she shook her head vehemently. “No, he did not. He was…kind to me and considerate. That night haunted him, too, and we had a silent understanding to put it behind us and never speak of it.”
Juliet nodded. “And then…you found yourself with child.”