11. Alira
Alira
I down a cup of water from a hydration tent with a row of cups already filled for people to grab before returning to Nikolai.
Nina and Ustel have already headed to the dance area.
I catch a glimpse of her rich brown hair and the sage dress she’s wearing.
Ustel is dressed impeccably too. His smile is brightest when he’s with her.
“They ditch you?” I tease Nikolai, trying to pick up my mood a little.
“Nah, they were too infatuated with one another to ditch anyone. It’s like the moment Ustel came up, Nina couldn’t see anyone else around her.” Nikolai laughs and glances over my shoulder, his eyes widening before flicking back down to me.
I quirk a brow and look over my shoulder to find Kalel walking steadily toward us.
His eyes light up when he spots me. “There you are, little godling.” He offers his hand and I take it, putting on a good farce of “everything is fine” so I don’t ruin the festival for everyone else.
Inside, my mind is racing with the herbs in my pocket and what the solstice might bring this evening.
It’s hard to act normal when the Gates of Mortem were open last night. The civilians deserve to know if there’s danger… I can’t shake the dread from my shoulders.
Kalel is dressed in his black military underjacket with gold accents along the seams. Gilded gauntlets cover his hands and extend to his elbows; they match the luminous laurel around his head.
He’s easily the most handsome man here. His pointed ears are adorned with the four golden cuff earrings he usually has in them, and his features look incredibly sharp tonight. It must be the fairy lights, I muse, offering him a warm smile.
Guilt tugs at my conscience. I hope Kalel doesn’t feel it when I break the sacred oath. I have no idea if it’s something the benefactor of the oath can sense. What will he do if he does? Will he know that it’s my doing? Or assume that it’s timed out? It’s enough to make me sick with worry.
“Where have you been?” I whisper once Kalel reaches me.
He bends and places a kiss on my cheek, murmuring back, “You look beautiful, Alira. Nina did well with your dress.” He straightens and takes in my attire.
Nikolai coughs. “I helped too.”
Kalel shoots him a disbelieving look. “Forgive me if I don’t take your word for it.”
I laugh. “He put one flower on. Nina did the rest,” I explain, and Nikolai looks offended but cracks a grin regardless.
Kalel smiles at me but there’s a distant look in his eyes. “The music will be starting soon. May I?” He lowers to his knee and bends forward, pressing a soft kiss to the top of my hand.
I curtsy the way that the ladies of other dukes showed me to and can’t help the blush that races across my cheeks.
“Have fun, you two,” Nikolai calls out when we start toward the open area they’ve left for the dancers. Nina and Ustel are already among the few couples standing together and waiting for the music to start.
Kalel walks in steady strides beside me, the weak smile still on his face, lost in his thoughts.
“Did you speak with King Achill about the gates?” I ask with a hushed tone. It has to be about the gates, or maybe Tessa got hurt on her way back here. Worry blooms in my chest and makes my throat dry at the thought.
Kalel glances down at me. There’s a wealth of misery in his gaze that doesn’t make me confident about what it means now that the gates are open.
“There’s nothing to worry about with the gates tonight.
The king will be taking care of it,” Kalel murmurs as he puts one hand around my waist and the other gently holds my hand to prepare for the dance.
He softens his expression, and it makes my stomach flip. “Follow my lead.”
I firm my lips. “But don’t you think it’s odd that the solstice—”
“Not another word about it, little godling,” Kalel says gently as he grins and steals away anything else I can say with a delicate kiss. He’s being so gentle and passive in responding to my questions. I have half a mind to delve into why, but his soft kisses are more enticing.
I smile at him as the music starts up. The orchestra is wondrous; they have an entire row of violinists in the front and a few cellos behind them.
A demon with a large drum, a few on harps and flutes.
Each of them dressed in formal wear, bright red uniforms that lace up to their jaws and gold buttons that line the front of their jackets.
They play the most enchanting song I’ve ever heard.
It’s heavy on the violins, playing the higher notes that jump around and make your heart race.
A surprised breath leaves my lips. “This is beautiful. I’ve never heard music like this before.” But it’s not just the song that’s beautiful. It’s all of it. The atmosphere, the cool evening air, and the joyful sounds of people dancing.
“They are the songs of night. Of Mortem. Of Pluto’s loneliness in his underworld kingdom.”
“Is death truly so lovely?” I murmur. It comes out sadder than I intended.
Kalel quirks a brow before grinning. “Not death…perhaps longing. It is longing and despair. Hope. The endless night that longs for the break of day. Mortem longs for life. Pluto must yearn for someone, don’t you think?”
“Hmm. Who knew such melancholic things could inspire such celebration?”
Kalel takes my hand with his right and places his left hand on my waist. Moving slowly so I can follow his steps.
He chuckles and moves languidly to the rhythm.
“Yes, sad above all else, I fear. Demons are terribly romantic,” he teases.
I follow his steps and study how lovely his eyes are when the string lights reflect in his gaze.
It’s incredibly intimate being locked in dance with him. I never thought that the Blood Knight who had once slain me so many times could be capable of such seamless and soft languid moves.
He pulls me closer as the song shifts to another dark, heavy string movement. “You look absolutely breathtaking.” Kalel leans his head against mine. “I know we’ve had our differences in the past, but I would be remiss if I did not tell you how I feel.”
My eyes widen as we dance slowly, making wide strides to the side and a few twirls before Kalel dips me back. My hair falls behind my shoulders, and I’m left gazing up into his eyes.
“At first, I thought it was only an obsession; I couldn’t get you out of my head.
The way you look at me with so much understanding and sympathy is unmatched.
Now I know that it is much more than that.
It is a desire to know you more than anyone has ever had the chance to.
To understand your love for the world around you and to see the world through your eyes.
You may have blood on your hands from our faults as knights, but you are beautiful in the way you use that pain to spread love and kindness.
I love you, Alira.” Kalel’s voice is soft, his eyes filling with tears as he sets his forehead down on my shoulder.
The dance comes to a close, and our feet stop simultaneously.
I wrap my arms around him and smile, tears spilling down my cheeks. “I love you too, Kalel. The seeds we’ll sow together in this world will bring light back into it.”
He pulls back enough to gaze down at me and leans in for a kiss. I’m almost too absorbed in our embrace to notice that a hush has fallen over the festival.
When I pull away from our kiss and press my cheek against his chest, I stare out into the crowd of demon-folk that watch us with curiosity and a flicker of hope. Acceptance. Part of me wonders if they’ve ever seen their army commander this gentle before. Or a demigod who isn’t trying to kill them.
I smile, feeling warmer than I’ve ever been. A beautiful future…
My eyes lift beyond the crowd, and for a moment, my heart stops beating.
I see them. Hundreds of them standing in the crowd.
Phantom-like figures that are the same from Mortem’s island before I was dragged into the water. Why am I still seeing them here? Tears spring to my eyes, and I take a rushed step away from Kalel before I can control myself. Fear racing through my bloodstream like liquid fire.
His eyes widen, and he dips down so he can see my face. “What’s wrong?”
I can’t look at him; my eyes are still trained on the phantoms. They appear so real, as if they are here now, except their faces are blurred. I know that I’m not hallucinating them. The laurel in my pocket feels heavier, calling out to me to finish the vision. I have to know what this means.
Kalel turns and looks where I’m staring off to.
“What is it? You’re worrying me, Alira.” He gently grabs my chin and brings my attention to him.
I try to blink the tears from my eyes, but they keep forming. He doesn’t see them. No one does. Behind Kalel in the crowd is the Krinsle, staring in the direction of the phantoms.
I want to confront him about it and ask if he sees them too, but Kalel stands and takes my hand to guide me away from the festival.
“Let’s get you some water,” he says with a worried tone.
We walk to the far end of the booths nearest to a line of trees that separates the fields from the kingdom.
Kalel goes to grab me a cup of water. I sit on a boulder and watch the others dance and laugh, forcing my eyes not to wander back to the phantoms. I’m sure they are still there at the other end.
“Thank you,” I murmur as I take the cup Kalel hands me. I slowly drink from it, not letting my attention drift back to the ghosts.
“Alira, I know Mortem must’ve frightened you yesterday… Honestly, I never expected to see the gates open myself.” Kalel runs his hand through his hair and sits beside me. “Is that what this is about? You can tell me.” He sets his hand on mine, and the warmth makes my heart flutter.
“I have an awful feeling about it, Kalel. The gates being open, the winter solstice… Please tell me what you’ve been keeping from me,” I ask and search his eyes desperately.