21. Lawton
Lawton
Sitting on the floor beside the porcelain, clawfoot tub, I stared at her. Talitha hadn’t uttered a word since we left the school. The ride to her house was spent with me glancing back and forth between her and the road.
She said she was overwhelmed and while I wanted to wait for her to tell me what was troubling her, I wanted to interrogate her.
I knew us having to push back things at the school played a part of it, but she looked aggravated prior to that. I had been sitting in the same position for the last twenty minutes just watching her.
Her hair was thrown up into a sloppy bun, and she sat with her knees up to her chest and arms secured around them. She was sitting there staring at nothing in particular.
I had long decided that I would sit with her until she was ready to either get out or talk. I had music playing throughout the house, but low enough to hear her in case she decided she was ready to speak.
“Can I wash you up?” I asked. Every so often she would reach down and drain the tub before filling the water back up so instead of waiting on it to get cold again, I figured the least I could do was bath her so we could get that over with.
Instead of speaking, she nodded. Grabbing her towel off the side of the tub, I dipped it in the water and squirted some of her body wash onto it.
Running the soapy towel over her shoulders, I made my way down to her back to wash there first. “You heard from Gema today?”
“Yeah. Willearl had took her to Betty Jo house the last time we talked.”
“Where is she staying?”
“With him and Bonnie. She doesn’t wanna stay with my Mama and her husband.”
So, Gema is okay. I wonder what could have happened to cause this sullen mood.
“You called Best Buy?”
“Yeah. They’re going to deliver them to your office space. I’ll come by and organize them, so they won’t be in the way in case you rent that space out.”
“You don’t have to do that. I’ll take care of it. In fact, I’ll keep it vacant until we can have everything moved into the school.”
“Thank you,” she mumbled.
“No need.”
“Remember that kid, Quantavious?”
Quantavious, Quantavious. I repeated in my head until the light bulb went off. “The one who you tried to keep from leaving the center that day?”
“Yeah. He’s been on the run. I found out today that he’s in custody of APD.”
“I’m assuming that’s a good thing.”
“Yeah.” She nodded, then frowned immediately. “I’m glad he went willingly otherwise we would be having a different conversation.”
“Is that what’s got you in such a bad mood?”
“I feel like I failed him, Harvey. Like I could have done more.”
“What more could you have done? You didn’t make that decision for him and you for damn sure didn’t put that gun in his hand.”
“I know that. But still… I could’ve done something else had I not reacted so late.”
“Look at me Talitha.” I grabbed her chin and tipped her head toward me. “You didn’t fail him. If anything, you tried to offer him an out. That kid had his mind made up before he even came to you. At least he cared enough about you to come and tell you bye. He didn’t have to do that.”
“I offered to get him counseling.” She fretted as her eyes filled with tears. “He turned it down.”
“He didn’t want it. You could’ve offered him anything thing in the world, if his mind was made up then there was nothing you could have done. This one isn’t on you Talitha. You can’t carry someone else’s burden.”
“Umph,” she scoffed. “I’ve been doing it my whole fucking life.”
“And it gets tiring.” Turning her head forcefully she snatched out of my grasp.
Dropping the towel in her lap, I grabbed her face between the palm of my hands.
“That tape that’s holding you up was put there by you.
You’re too busy trying to save the world Talitha when the person you should be trying to save is yourself.
You can’t be anything to anyone until you first be it for yourself.
Stop trying to fight battles for the world. ”
“I don’t want to fight in general,” she admitted while the tears she was holding back rushed down her face.
“Then stop baby. All you’re doing is hurting yourself. Everyone sees how hard you go for those kids. We applaud your effort. Focus on the ones you can impact and do whatever you can within reason for the ones you can’t. That’s the only thing you can do.”
“It’s easier said than done,” she argued.
“No, it’s not. You’ve gotta learn how to separate the two. If you don’t, you’re going to end up killing yourself from stress. Then who gon’ take care of Gema.”
“My pissy ass Mama.” She laughed.
Dropping her face, I mushed her head and chuckled. “You talking real crazy right now.”
“I know right. Seriously though, this whole mold situation is doing nothing for my anxiety.”
“Mine either. But shit, we have no control over that situation either. All we can do is wait on Jose to handle shit on his end before moving forward. Everything will work itself out.”
“I hope it does.”
“Feeling better?”
She hiked one shoulder up and mumbled, “I don’t know.”
“Can you at least finish bathing yourself? My knees are starting to cramp up.”
“God, you’re old,” she mouthed and picked up her towel.
“Old my ass. Finish washing up. I’ll be back in a second.” Pecking her on the lips, I stood and ambled out of the bathroom. I had Chari place an Instacart order for Talitha some sleepy time tea.
I needed to go fix it for her so by the time she was out of the tub and into bed, her ass would be able to get some sleep.
With the piping hot mug of tea in hand, I headed back up the stairs and into my bedroom. Talitha was sitting on the side of the bed still wrapped up in her towel doing something on her phone.
“Here.” I handed her the tray. “Drink this.”
“Are you trying to poison me?”
“As good as your pussy, is I wouldn’t dare,” I joked to make light of the situation.
“That’s good to know.” She chuckled. “What’s this then?”
“It’s sleep tea. You need to go to bed. Your eyes have been down casted all day. I need you to wake up in better spirits.”
“And you think this is going to miraculously solve all of my problems.”
“It won’t. But it’ll help your ass get a good night’s rest.”
After silencing her phone, she placed it on the nightstand and picked up the mug. “It smells like lavender,” she drawled after sniffing it.
“It’s got lavender and jasmine in it, I believe. Shit… I really don’t know. I didn’t pay attention to the ingredients to be honest.”
“You could be feeding me drugs, Harvey.”
“Talitha,” I rasped. “Drink the damn tea.”
“Fine.” She rolled her eyes. Bringing the mug up to her mouth, she blew on it before taking a sip. “It’s got a good taste.”
“I know. I put some honey and a few drops of lemon juice in it. Finish that while I go shower. Then I can hold you until you fall asleep.”
“Yes sir.” She saluted and my dick jumped. I had to talk him down because tonight wasn’t the time for him to get all excited. The only thing on my agenda for the night was making sure she was okay.
Walking into the bathroom, I turned on the shower, stripped out of my clothes, and stepped in so I could wash the stress of today away. On top of dealing with the shit at the school, I was trying to figure out a way to move more cocaine through the state while still flying under the radar.
The smart thing to do would be to find someone else to help distribute it but I wasn’t too keen on working with folks I didn’t know personally.
If I reached a point where I had exhausted all of my options, I would reach out to Poppa. I knew he would be able to put me with someone that he trusted to help get the shit off. Once I felt clean enough, I stepped of the shower and dried off.
After brushing my teeth, I strolled into the room and found Talitha tucked under the covers.
Hitting the lights, I flipped the covers back and got in bed beside her.
After getting adjusted, I pulled her into my side and wrapped my arm around her waist. My eyes stayed trained on the ceiling until I myself drifted off to sleep.
* * *
“Mold…” Poppa trailed off.
“Fucking mold, man.”
“Damn Dutch. Yo’ ass getting hit from every fucking corner.”
“Who the fuck you telling? That shit done set us back at least a month.”
“You told Talitha?”
“I ain’t say shit. She already been stressing over the shit, the last thing I want her to do is feel defeated.”
Yesterday, Jose reached back out to me to let me know he had gotten with the restoration company. Like he thought he was going to have to strip the entire second floor restrooms, lucky enough for us the mold was contained to just that area.
Apparently, the ventilation system sat above the second floor and caused a leak that was never taken care of. As a result, everything molded and now the shits gotta be fixed.
“That right there is enough to send a muthafucka over the edge. I can’t believe the city just let that building sit up like that.”
“They wasn’t worried ‘bout that shit. Hell, I did them a favor by taking it off their hands.”
“I fucking bet. Other than that. What’s been up?”
“Shit. Trying to get shit worked out with Adele.”
“What’s going on with her?”
“Basically, I’mma either have to unload more shit or find somebody else to help me. They fields are packed, the shit ain’t moving fast enough.”
“Nawl. You gon’ have to get with that nigga Preme and figure out how to move it. You ain’t got the time to be trying to rope nobody else into ya’ business.”
“Same shit I was saying. If anything, I was gon’ see if you could put me on somebody.”
“I mean… shit.” Poppa stroked his chin. “I got a potential. Josiah ass need something to do cause him trying to get back on the football field ain’t happening no time soon.”
“I know Josiah?”
“Nawl. You know his twin, which brings me to my reason for hitting you up? I need to cash in that favor, Dutch.”
“I got you Pop. What is it?”
“You still cool with Kovi Myron?”