28. Noah #2
“You’re not going to screw it up.” Macey ripped off a small piece of the croissant and chewed it gently.
“I’m not sure about that.”
“Why do you think so?”
Needing more time to answer, I finished off the rest of the croissant and dreamed about having babies with it.
I picked at the edge of the wicker basket.
“I’ve never had to worry about keeping someone close to me before.
I mean, I have Daphne and Nathan, but they’re family, so they’re trapped with me.
Everyone else usually had a motive for wanting to spend time with me.
So I learned it was best to keep everyone at a distance. ”
“You said you think about people like Instagram followers. They’ll either leave or come to dislike you.” She folded the napkin in her lap. “Do you still think that?”
That had been my philosophy for so long, but it sounded wrong now. “I’m not sure. I mean, look at some of the shit people have said about you online.”
Macey shook her head. “I’m not talking about those anonymous online jerks. We’ll never figure out who they are, and they don’t matter. I’m talking about the people around you, for real.”
I thought about it. Really, truly thought it over in a way I hadn’t before.
Was it fair of me to think about people in that way?
People like Macey, Daphne, and Nathan had proved that some people do stick around.
That they’re capable of seeing through all the bullshit you put out there and still love you anyways.
“Yes,” I said and watched her eyes fill with disappointment.
Before she could turn away, I put my forefinger under her chin and lifted her eyes to meet mine. “But I’ll add a third option. Some people will stick by you, too, even when you say something stupid or post a horrible sushi photo.”
She cracked a smile.
“I like you, Macey, almost as much as I love you. I’m frantically trying to figure out how to get you not to leave.”
“There’s nothing for you to figure out.” She scooted closer to me so that our thighs were touching. “I don’t think you could get rid of me now. Because I like you and I love you.”
Did my heart just fucking soar at those words?
Yes. And I was not ashamed.
I wrapped an arm around her shoulders and pulled her closer into my chest, feeling the warmth of her body against mine. “I love you, Scribbles.”
She rested her head against my chest, her voice soft and teasing. “I love you, too. But I hope you don’t mean I can’t leave you in a physical sense.”
“Of course not,” I murmured, my fingers gently stroking her arm. “I’m never going to stop you from going places. I want to be the person in your corner, cheering you on, confident in the knowledge that you’ll come back.”
“We’ll always come back to each other.” She shifted slightly, pulling back just enough to rest her head against the tree trunk. Her eyes softened as she looked at me. “So where does that leave us now?”
“In a real relationship, of course,” I said, feeling a smile spread across my face as I brushed a stray strand of hair behind her ear.
“Right.” Her smile mirrored mine as she leaned into my touch. “I can’t believe it took us so long to get here. What do we do now?”
I cocked my head. “What do you mean?”
“Logistically, we don’t have to keep up with fake dates now. Do we say anything publicly?”
“Nah,” I said, my hand moving down to rest on her leg, giving it a light squeeze. “Let people think what they’re going to think.”
Her eyes searched mine for a moment before she asked, “Are you happy?”
I blinked, taken aback. “This is literally the happiest moment of my life. Why would you ask that?”
“Not just about this, but in general.” She bit her lip, her brows knitting together.
“You’re taking a social media break, you’re going back to school to change careers, you’re in a new relationship.
That’s a lot of change.” Her voice softened, tinged with hesitation.
“Are you happy with how everything turned out?”
I paused, considering her question. “Truth is, I’m still not sure what I’m doing.
” I pulled her closer, our foreheads nearly touching.
“I think it’ll take me a while to get there and feel completely happy and confident in my decisions.
But this? Me and you?” I pressed my lips gently against her forehead, lingering there for a moment.
“It will always be the one thing I’m confident in and happy about. What about you?”
Macey smiled, her hand resting on my chest. “Me?”
“It’s not like you haven’t had a lot of changes, too. Are you happy?” I asked, my fingers lacing with hers.
“Yeah.” She nodded, her grip tightening around my hand.
“I’m actually a lot happier than I thought I was going to be.
Getting fired sucked, but it made me realize how ready I am for the next stage of my career.
” She leaned forward, her face inches from mine, her smile widening.
“Starting my blog made me feel like I was in control over something I loved. Not to mention, I get to do it all with a hot boyfriend at my side.”
Boyfriend.
The word sent a thrill through me, new and unfamiliar but in the best possible way. I tilted my head, my heartbeat quicking as I leaned in to brush a soft kiss on her lips. “Speaking of doing it all…” I couldn’t hide the grin that spread across my face. “What are you doing this summer?”