Chapter 17
Chapter Seventeen
Fuck.
“So, are you having a nice evening?” Hazel asked innocently as soon as he closed the door.
Yes, he had been before she interrupted him. “I don’t want to hear your rant.”
“Fox…”
“Save it, Hazel.”
“Fox…”
“May I remind you that I caught you and Gareth having sex in a janitor’s closet only a few months ago?”
“Yes, and now we’re even. However…”
He looked away and crossed his arms. “What are you doing here, Hazel?”
“I have to remove two ATVs from a private beach! The tow truck will be here any minute. So, what are you doing here, Fox?”
He’d thought it was rather obvious…
“God, Fox. She’s not just any woman,” she hissed, taking a few steps away from his car, presumably so Lilly wouldn’t hear her.
“I’m aware of that.”
“Are you? Because if anything goes wrong between you two…”
“It’s merely sex. We talked about it.”
“Oh, well then,” she said, dripping with sarcasm. “Thank God these kinds of arrangements never go wrong! Thank God no one ever gets hurt in these situations. Shit, Fox. Are you sure you can trust her? After everything that’s happened?”
“I don’t trust her,” he replied tersely.
“Ah, right. So, you can’t trust her, but you’re obviously sleeping with her?”
“Well, the two things aren’t necessarily related. And we haven’t slept together.” Not yet.
“Does she know that too?”
“I think Lilly knows exactly what distinguishes sex from not-quite-sex. She’s rather intelligent.”
“Does she also believe that trust and sex are unrelated?” Hazel snapped at him.
He gritted his teeth. “I don’t give a damn what she thinks.”
“Oh, Austin. You don’t truly believe that, do you?” His best friend looked at him pityingly. “You care about everyone. You don’t have one-night stands. You don’t shirk responsibility. You take everything and everyone seriously. You’re too good of a person to be indifferent to her!”
“Well, maybe I’m just fed up with it,” he snapped.
“Maybe I’m just fucking tired of doing the right thing because what the hell has it gotten me?
Nothing but a lot of pain. Maybe I just wanted to sleep with her because it feels good.
Not because it's right. Maybe sometimes I hate being diplomatic and fair and selfless. Maybe right now, I only want to be selfish and not give a damn how Lilly feels about all this. I just want to focus on her body and not have to say no anymore just because I always consider the consequences.”
Hazel blinked and her eyes widened in shock. “You…what…”
“Oh, don’t act as if I’ve never yelled at someone in my life,” he said, annoyed.
He was tired of always being the good guy who didn’t want to hurt anyone, only to have his heart ripped out in return. He was tired of being careful, of waiting, of being considerate, and thinking about everyone else before himself.
Hazel was judging something she knew nothing about!
Lilly was a grown woman. He’d given her every chance to say no, but a yes had slipped out. And he wasn’t masochistic enough to then deny himself what he’d been thinking about nonstop for three weeks.
He wanted her. She wanted him.
Screw the consequences! Screw right and wrong! Screw complicated!
Nothing between Lilly and him was easy. Except when they kissed. Except when the world around them faded away and all they could feel and taste were each other. And damn it, he needed a break from the stress, and she obviously did too, so…
“It’s not only about Lilly, Fox,” Hazel warned. “If your daughter finds out…”
“She won’t,” he said sharply. “Thanks to you, nothing’s happened that can’t be ignored anyway.”
It was possibly the biggest lie he’d ever told because, God, he was already addicted to the sounds Lilly made when she came. But Hazel didn’t need to know that.
“Fox…”
“Mind the quads, Hazel, not my life,” he warned.
“If you did a better job with it, I wouldn’t have to get involved, Austin,” she retorted stubbornly, turning abruptly and leaving.
Austin took a deep breath…thinking that he’d probably never be able to sit behind the wheel of that car again without getting hard. And shit, he wanted to pick up where they’d left off.
Unfortunately, during his conversation with Hazel, Delfina had called to say she was coming home soon and Yunai’s mom wanted to know if Lilly was there.
He drove Lilly home in silence, exchanging not a single word about what had transpired.
But he couldn’t ignore it either.
He didn’t want to.
What had happened on the beach with the boys, on the other hand…in his opinion, no one needed to mention that.
“Two million viewers! Your live stream-video has had two million viewers!” Gray thundered.
Three thick veins were throbbing on his forehead, threatening to burst, while Alvarez, Nieminen, Temple, and Ford were slumped over on the locker room bench like popped balloons.
“And I bet it’ll be four million by tonight! What the hell were you thinking?!”
None of the four players responded. They seemed to realize it was a rhetorical question.
“And shit, if you think I’m angry, you should see the Dragon! Not to mention Lucy.”
Dax narrowed his eyes, as if the coach didn’t need to remind him of his girlfriend’s anger and that of her boss, whom they called The Dragon.
The coach continued his tirade about how reckless, dangerous, and asocial their actions had been when Moreau gently nudged Fox with his shoulder.
“So, I heard you yelled at Hazel yesterday,” he muttered almost inaudibly.
Fox stiffened. “Can you focus on us being yelled at?”
“No. Because, Fox, you don’t yell.”
“Hazel would say otherwise.”
“What happened?”
“As if she didn’t tell you.”
Moreau sighed softly.
Yep, he knew.
“…any idea how disappointed I am in you guys?” the coach shouted, and Fox refocused on the three veins on his forehead. “You’re lucky you’re not facing a lawsuit. So, tell me whose brilliant idea was it?” he snapped. “Who all was involved?”
No one spoke. No one wanted to rat anyone else out. No one wanted to live with the consequences. The four of them were equally guilty, they knew that — Gray would have to punish every single one of them.
It was a disaster. If they were all out – three of their best players and the backup goalie – they wouldn’t stand a chance in tonight’s game.
Fuck.
Losing four good players was something they couldn’t compensate for.
But losing one…
“It was my idea,” Austin stated.
All heads turned to him at once, each one more incredulous than the last.
But no one looked as shocked as the coach. “What?”
“It was my idea,” Austin repeated, unfazed. “I’ve wanted to ride a quad bike on the beach for years. Nieminen, Temple, Ford, and Alvarez tried to talk me out of it, but I convinced them to join me. It’s not their fault; I was in a bad mood, and they just wanted to make me happy.”
Leon choked on his own spit and started coughing, but Austin ignored him.
“I sank one of the quad bikes in the ocean. I thought it would be a good idea to spare our clothes while we were trying to pull it out of the sand. It wouldn’t be fair to yell at the others for something that was entirely my fault.”
Gray opened his mouth…and closed it again.
“Oh, Fox,” Moreau whispered.
Fox didn’t reply. He didn’t feel like talking to him at all.
“Okay, out. Now,” Gray barked, pointing a finger at the locker room door.
Austin rose slowly to his feet and strolled into the hallway. He was going to enjoy the calm before the storm while he still…
“What the hell is wrong with you!” Gray snapped as soon as he’d closed the door. “I know it wasn’t you.”
“Yes, it was my idea,” he replied tonelessly, meeting Gray’s gaze impassively. “I seem to be making nothing but stupid decisions these past few days.”
“Fox…”
“It was me, Gray,” he insisted. “The guys just didn’t want to disappoint me. That’s why they went along with it.”
The coach closed his eyes and shook his head. “They don’t deserve your protection.”
“No, but the team doesn’t deserve to suffer because of their stupidity either,” he replied quietly.
“Fox, I have to punish someone.”
“I know. And I’m standing right in front of you. What are you waiting for?”
“Fine,” Gray snapped. He’d clearly run out of patience. “If you want to stick to your ridiculous story, you’re out for tonight’s game, and your fine will be so damn high, you’ll wish you hadn’t lied for those idiots.”
“You really think I care about a little bit of money?” he replied with a snort before turning and walking away. But he only made it to the end of the corridor before Temple caught up with him.
“Shit, Fox, what’s the matter?”
Fox turned abruptly. Why did everyone keep asking him that? “I’m making sure we don’t lose tonight,” he informed Dax tensely.
He could only have read the guilt more clearly on Dax’s face if the forward had been holding up a sign. “Fox, this isn’t fair, we…”
“I don’t want to hear it,” he said harshly.
“You guys messed up, and no fine in the world could punish you more than knowing I’m the one who has to suffer for it because I’m your captain, and because I take my job seriously, unlike you, who only thought of yourselves instead of the rest of your fucking team that is counting on you.
So, win tonight, damn it, or I’m going to get really pissed off. We’re done here.”
He left Dax standing there, shoulders hunched, mouth gaping.
He’d had enough.
He needed to get out of here anyway. He hadn’t slept half the night.
He’d wanted to text Lilly ten times, but had deleted every message.
He was unfocused, dissatisfied, and in an incredibly bad mood.
He didn’t want to talk to Dax. He didn’t want to talk to Hazel.
He didn’t want to talk to Moreau. He didn’t want to be talked into seeing reason.
He wanted to make a mistake, one that would bear Lilly’s name.
He’d always done everything right in his life, even more so since his parents had died. He’d always put the team before himself. Shit, he’d put everyone else before himself his whole life, but it hadn’t gotten him anywhere and enough was enough.
There was only one thing he wanted to do with this suddenly free morning. So, he got in his car and headed for Santa Monica.
The sun shone brightly on Sunshine Pier and the windows of Lilly’s house, next to which, for some inexplicable reason, a small goat and a chicken were tethered.
Austin ignored the petting zoo. He didn’t knock on the glass door of the soon-to-be shop, which Lilly should be locking. He didn’t wait to see if she heard the bell above the door. He crossed the empty showroom purposefully and headed straight for her workshop.
Lilly’s light blonde hair was pulled into a high, messy bun on top of her head, and sweat trickled down her slender neck. She wore jeans and a baggy gray t-shirt covered in burn marks, as misshapen as the piece of glass she was currently holding in the furnace.
Nothing about her was supposed to be sexy — yet everything was.
The way she moistened her lips as she concentrated, her gaze fixed on the melting furnace. The curve of her back. The light reflecting in her eyes. The thin strip of skin between her jeans and worn sneakers.
Looking at Lilly like this, he felt that missing today’s game wasn’t so bad. He’d rather take any fine than miss this.
He didn’t care about the consequences. He didn’t care about Hazel and Moreau’s warnings.
He only cared about the woman in front of him.
“Austin,” she said, surprised to see him, placing the rod of melting glass beside the furnace. “What are you doing…”
He didn’t let her finish.
He closed the distance between them, dug his hands into her hair, and pressed his mouth hard against hers.
He was tired of waiting. Tired of merely dreaming about her.
He wanted reality and he wanted it now.
Lilly opened her lips in surprise and today, he wasn’t polite enough not to take advantage of it immediately.
He slid his tongue into her mouth as he pushed her backward across the room until they met resistance.
He grabbed her hands and pressed them against the cold wall beside her head, trapping her body and deepening the kiss.
Lilly leaned forward, arching her back. Austin loved the way her soft breasts pressed against his hard chest. Loved the needy sounds from Lilly’s mouth that instantly went to his cock, which was pressing uncomfortably against the zipper of his jeans.
He loved how she intertwined her fingers with his and tilted her head to the right in a silent invitation.
He didn’t hesitate. He kissed her cheek, tugged at her earlobe, and showered her neck with moist kisses.
She tasted salty and sweet at the same time, and it drove him wild.
He couldn’t think of anything but whether she tasted this good everywhere.
Or if it would be even better if he buried his face between her thighs and brought her to orgasm with his tongue.
But right now, he was too impatient. Right now, he was so hard it hurt.
And damn it, he’d only kissed her, not really even touching her!
“Austin,” Lilly gasped, studying him with glazed eyes. “What…what’s wrong?”
“I have an unexpected day off and I want to spend it doing exactly this,” he replied darkly before sealing her lips with his again.
He didn’t want to talk.
He was allowed to forget. He was allowed to make mistakes. He was allowed to be selfish. He was allowed to take what he wanted.
And, shit, right now, that was Lilly.