Chapter FifteenAinsley
I didn’t have many friends outside the club, and I’d always considered Nova my best friend, even when my parents were alive. Looking back, I didn’t know if our forced proximity bred familiarity and, in turn, what I believed was a loyal confidante. As kids, we had no choice but to be in each other’s company because of our parents. My dad was the VP for as long as I remembered. To me, my father’s death destabilized the club. Roman never confirmed that the one time I brought it up, but I wasn’t an idiot. Before Daddy’s death, the officers weren’t voted out the way they were nowadays. He worked so closely with Boom Boom, it seemed logical that Nova and I gravitated to each other.
Understanding she currently acted out of a place of trauma and putting myself in danger on her behalf warred within me. I worried what she’d say about why I hadn’t come inside and spent time with her. Everyone knew Roman was on a run with the officers. Because he was gone, they’d removed the guards from our house, in spite of his protests. He wanted them there to protect me.
But I couldn’t handle Nova’s bullshit after the stunt she pulled. After the damage our friendship already endured, she’d used me to see Louisiana on his home turf, then barged into Reese’s room and finished showing her ass.
Tightening my arms around Reese’s trim waist, I leaned into the turn he made. Being on the back of his bike felt so different than all the times I’d rode on the back of Roman’s. He’d taught me how to enjoy rides—he’d taught me to ride, shoot, and throw knives. Having a bike of my own wasn’t a goal, though. I preferred fast cars, loud music, and football.
I’d learned how to shoot because Roman insisted. He’d also insisted I learned how to get away from attackers. But I’d never had to shoot to kill and hoped I never would. Would I hesitate to shoot if it meant saving my life? No. It was survival of the fittest and I considered myself quite fit.
Would taking someone’s life haunt me? I think it would depend on the circumstances.
I always preferred peaceful resolutions to any type of violence. Nor could I imagine sitting up all night with my gun in hand, stressing about one of Roman’s brothers breaking in to seek justice for whatever story Nova spun. My guess was she’d blame her injuries on me. Probably as retribution for that scene with Boom Boom. She certainly couldn’t admit that she’d gotten her ass kicked by the wife of the man she was sneaking around with.
Luckily, I was on the phone with my brother who was in a private room with his club members when Boom Boom’s phone rang and he said it was Nova, then excused himself.
Roman looked happy and healthy, and that was all I could ask for. Seeing he wasn’t in danger, I decided to listen to my survival instincts. I hadn’t expected to find Reese still outside.
The man was positively insane. He had no self-preservation.
Apparently, neither did I, since I allowed him to talk me into leaving with him. The day wore me out, leaving my defenses down. I was tired and hungry, and only wanted a hot shower and food. Unfortunately, my nausea was building. Morning sickness was a misnomer. It happened any time of the day. Small meals helped, though it didn’t completely alleviate my vomiting. At some point over the course of a day, I’d throw up. Early this morning, nausea awakened me, so I thought I was home free.
Not .
I packed crackers and 7Up in my overnight bag. As soon as we got to wherever Reese was bringing me, I’d dig them out and pray my stomach settled. I refused to vomit in front of him.
We rode so long I began to worry he was taking me somewhere to harm me. It seemed the joke was on me after all because I’d once again trusted him. As we headed southwest on Monarch Highway, my anxiety grew. He exited at Idaho Road, hooked a right, then a left at Jackson and cut off onto a dark road, kicking up dust and gravel.
I swallowed, but my mouth was dry and my pulse thumped through my body. Making me disappear would solve my unwanted pregnancy. If he claimed the baby, his girlfriend might not be happy. If he didn’t want the baby, it could one day pop up, asking why Reese chose abandonment.
He slowed his speed. My hand went to my .357, a gift for my eighteenth birthday. I had a permit to carry, but had I honestly graduated to a license to kill? I could always claim self-defense. However, I’d be marked for death by the Royal Bastards.
There was also the baby to consider. After weeks of debating on keeping it or aborting it, I felt insane for wanting to protect it so fiercely. For a little while, Reese gave me hope. I still didn’t know how I’d tell Roman and I still feared his reaction, but I thought…never mind. I was the idiot. Reese had already proven who he was. I’d just used the pregnancy as an excuse to see him again.
This was my baby. Fuck him.
My fingers closed around the grip. My life was as valuable to me as the baby’s. I wouldn’t fight to live for one more than the other. Without me living, there was no child.
Reese glided to a stop beside a van, the tires of his motorcycle crunching over the gravel as he eased it into place. The engine rumbled a final note before falling silent, leaving only the crackling of the cold night air to fill the stillness. He dropped his feet to the ground with a soft thud, his boots meeting the earth with a muted finality, his movement smooth as he dismounted. The air around him seemed to hold its breath as he stood there, for just a moment, staring back the way we’d come.
A faint light broke through the blanket of darkness, flickering just ahead like a beacon. It was enough to highlight the outline of the small structure—its wooden exterior almost blending with the night, as if it had grown out of the forest itself. The light was sparse, uneven, as though the cabin itself were reluctant to reveal too much. From this angle, it seemed distant, untouchable, like it was waiting for something or someone to approach.
The cold of the night cut through the stillness, its chill seeping underneath my clothes and into my bones. The stars above, scattered like silver dust across the velvet sky, seemed closer here—every twinkle of light vivid against the backdrop of darkness. The crescent moon, hanging low and luminous, cast a silvery glow over the landscape, a fragile illumination that barely touched the edges of the trees surrounding them. There was something surreal about it—the way the night felt both alive and still at the same time, as though the land itself held its breath, waiting.
The trees, tall and thick, stood sentinel-like around the cabin, their branches creaking softly in the wind. The forest was alive with its own sounds—an owl hooting faintly in the distance, the rustle of leaves carried on the breeze, the subtle scurry of night creatures hidden just beyond the reach of the light. For a moment, there was a fleeting sense of peace—of quiet isolation that should’ve felt serene. But it didn’t. Instead, there was something unsettling about the silence.
The stillness felt too thick, like the air itself held a secret. The quiet wasn’t comforting. It was… expectant. And somehow, that tension in the air made the forest seem not just peaceful, but somehow watchful. As if the trees themselves were leaning in, listening. Waiting. It was the kind of stillness that made the hairs on the back of my neck rise, the kind of silence that felt too heavy for comfort.
The peacefulness that should’ve settled over the area, that gentle calm of being surrounded by nature, seemed like a veneer. Beneath it, there was something else—something almost forgotten, lurking in the quiet.
It was the perfect place for me to disappear, and the problem of my pregnancy would be resolved.
Reese killed the engine. “We’re here, babe.”
“Hmmm.” Sweat bubbled on my skin and my hands trembled. “Where is here?”
Before he answered, the door swung open, and I jumped.
“About fucking time, Reese,” Louisiana grouched. Before I decided if his presence was good or bad, he said, “Ainsley, maybe you can talk to Jinx.”
“No fucking way,” Reese snapped, unaware of my entire body sagging in relief and my adrenaline crashing. “I didn’t bring her here to get into your fucking drama.”
“Please.” Louisiana’s desperation shocked me. “Jinx is leaving in the morning.”
“I’m not Jinx anymore,” a female voice cried. “I’m Denali.”
Louisiana swore.
Once Reese kicked the stand in place, he dismounted, then wrapped an arm around my waist and lifted me off. He held out his hand. “Give me your gun.”
“Kiss my ass.” I stomped around him. “I’ll be completely defenseless.”
He caught up to me just as I reached the steps, but Louisiana loomed in front of me, planting himself at the top of the small porch.
“You’re not coming in here armed, Ainsley.”
“Guns aren’t allowed in the cabin?” I asked.
“Chicks with guns aren’t allowed in the cabin,” he amended. “Either you give it to Reese or you give it to me.”
“If you weren’t such fucking assholes, you wouldn’t be concerned about women with weapons,” I bit out, outnumbered by dickheads. Praying I wasn’t making a mistake, I unholstered my gun, turned, and handed it to Reese.
He snapped the chamber open and emptied it.
“Christ, Ainsley. You have fucking hollow point bullets?” Reese grumbled.
“Roman wanted to make sure all threats were completely disabled,” I explained with a shrug, wondering how he saw in the darkness to know what ammo I had in the gun. I glanced over my shoulder and found Reese shining his phone’s flashlight on the bullet.
Louisiana stepped aside. “Go in. I need to talk to Reese.”
His tone brooked no argument. Now that I was unarmed, I thought it best to comply, so I brushed by Louisiana and walked inside, where a couch sat against one wall and a table with four chairs against another. A compact kitchen was on the other side of the room. Jinx leaned against the counter, arms folded, eyes puffy and red.
The moment her blue gaze landed on me, she stiffened and narrowed her eyes.
“You have some fucking balls bringing your ass here,” she snarled.
Although I didn’t resemble Nova, I’d leave nothing to chance. Mistaken identity had gotten more than one person fucked up. “I’m not Nova.”
“I know who you are, Ainsley. You’re that bitch’s friend. Guilt by association.”
I pressed my lips together to hold in my wince. She was right. Despite my suspicions and warnings about Louisiana, I looked the other way.
“I don’t know what you expected me to do,” I said in my own defense.
Tears slid down her cheeks and she swiped them angrily away. “You could’ve…you could’ve…” Her lips trembled.
“I couldn’t have done anything. When I…” Well, damn. I couldn’t let her know how deeply she’d been betrayed because Reese knew, too. As Louisiana’s best friend, he must’ve been reasonably acquainted with his wife. “I-I told Nova that I thought he was married. She didn’t believe me. If I’d had a way to contact you and spilled the beans, would you have believed me?”
She glanced at the floor, then turned away. “It doesn’t fucking matter. I’m leaving first thing tomorrow. My father’s coming to pick me up.”
Opening a cabinet door, she snatched a mug and filled it with water from the kitchen sink. She stalked to the microwave and began the heating process.
She folded her arms and stalked to me. “But if he thinks I’ll stay under the same roof with his bitch’s friend, he’s out of his fucking mind. I was going to say you or me.” She poked me in the chest. “If you don’t get the fuck out right now, I’ll do everything I’d love to do to Nova to you.”
Perhaps, the stress of the day and all the turmoil got the best of me. Or my fatigue and hunger. Maybe it was a combination. I turned away from Jinx and retched a combination of dry heaves, bile, and the water I’d drank when I was home. For the first time since my pregnancy began, weakness assailed me, and I plunked on my butt. It felt as if I’d sink into unconsciousness at any moment.
Jinx knelt beside me and swiped a cold towel over my face.
“Do you have any saltines?” I asked faintly, tipping my head back and resting the towel on my forehead. The spackled ceiling was a shiny white. Cotton Candy pink would’ve been prettier. I closed my eyes. “And 7Up ?”
“Are you pregnant?” she asked suspiciously.
I nodded.
“Who’s the daddy?”
I popped one eye open. She was resting on her haunches, waiting for my answer, her worry palpable. She probably knew Reese’s old lady. Whatever the reason I sought him out, I didn’t want to make trouble for him. “None of your business.”
When she jumped to her feet, I opened both my eyes and straightened. “It’s Reese’s,” she said flatly. “You wouldn’t be here otherwise. This is my safe space, away from the Devil’s Pit. A rule of mine is no one comes here besides Keir and me except Reese. It’s a sacred law that’s never been broken. Until now.” She glared at me. “Now, I know why.”
I didn’t know what to say. I couldn’t explain why Reese broke her rule on my account when he didn’t want anything to do with me. That man was so fucking confusing.
Laying my head on the coffee table, I ignored the vomit next to me. I couldn’t clean it and Jinx wouldn’t. I heard cabinet doors opening and closing, ice clinking into a glass, and the fizz of a soda.
Jinx knelt again and helped me to my feet, then guided me to the sofa. Once I sat, she handed me a sleeve of crackers.
“Take little nibbles,” she warned, turning on her heel and walking out of sight. She came back, carrying paper towels and dragging a mop that left a damp trail. She cleaned the vomit in silence, while I ate a cracker.
I feared eating too much. I didn’t want to vomit again.
Once the mess was cleared away, she wiped her hands on her jeans and sat next to me. “How many weeks along are you?”
“About ten.”
“Your ultrasound didn’t confirm it?”
“I haven’t seen a doctor yet,” I confessed. “I didn’t know if I wanted the baby. Before I made a decision, I wanted Reese to know.” Not wanting to see her judgment, I lowered my lashes. “Before you say it, I know it was just an excuse to see him.”
“I think you made the right decision, Ainsley. The honorable one.”
A longing for my mom and the urge to cry hit me so hard. I wanted someone to talk to and celebrate my pregnancy. If Reese didn’t want his baby or me, I wouldn’t waste my energy trying to change his mind. Besides, if I had to do that, it wouldn’t work anyway. He had to want to be a part of our lives. Not because of pressure from me, but because it was the right thing to do.
“I don’t know how I’m going to tell my brother. The reason I slept with Reese was stupid and childish. It was a mistake.” I swiped at an escaping tear. “No, that wasn’t the mistake. Not confessing who my brother was, was the mistake.”
Jinx laid a hand on my arm. Her touch was comforting and prompted me to look at her. “When we’re in the moment, we believe we’re doing what needs to be done. Don’t beat yourself up over what you can’t change.” She dropped her hand and settled it in her lap. “Do you want the baby?”
“Yeah,” I whispered, admitting that truth for the first time.
She hugged me tightly. “Then congratulations, babe. Enjoy this time because it goes by so quickly.”
Resting my head on her shoulder, I hugged her back. “You’ve been pregnant before?”
She pulled away and leaned against the sofa. “Almost every year for five straight years. The last pregnancy went full term, but my son was stillborn. I just gave up trying. I’m thirty-one. In four years, I’ll be considered even more high-risk.”
“I’m so sorry, Jinx. If this is too hard on you and you prefer I leave, I’ll understand.”
“My pregnancy losses were hard, especially the last one because everything seemed fine. But the world didn’t stop spinning at my pain. Life went on. I can’t shit on someone else’s joy.” She hugged me again, this time quick and tight. “If I were staying, I’d be here for you.”
“I think Louisiana…” My voice trailed off. I couldn’t fix my mouth to say he loved her. If he had, he wouldn’t have betrayed their wedding vows. I sipped from the glass of soda, sighed in pleasure at the ginger ale, then grabbed the crackers. “I didn’t know you’d be there today. Nor did I know the real reason Nova rode with me. He’d began pulling away from her, which prompted her stunt today.”
“It doesn’t matter. Keir knows cheating is a hard no for me.” Tears rushed to her eyes again. “He gave me a bullshit excuse that I stupidly believed. Repeatedly. Whenever I questioned his whereabouts, he always gave me a valid reason. How can I ever trust him again?”
I didn’t have an answer.
“I’ve been with him since I was twenty and we’ve been married for ten years. I don’t know why he’d ruin us. It doesn’t matter. I’m done. I’m contacting an attorney the first thing tomorrow.”
“I’m probably not equipped to advise you for several reasons, Jinx—”
“Denali. Jinx is Reese’s nickname for me that everyone picked up.”
I digested that information. “Okay, Denali ,” I amended. “If you need to leave and think things over, then you should. But don’t immediately contact an attorney. Wait a few weeks. Your perspective might change.”
I grabbed another cracker and took a small bite.
“How could he betray me?” she whispered in a trembling voice and began sobbing. “How could he touch another woman and then come home to me with words of love? Pretending he couldn’t wait to have me.”
“I’m sorry,” I said. “I’m so sorry.”
“It isn’t your fault. It isn’t even Nova’s fault as much as that kills me to admit. It’s Keir’s. He’s the married one. He took the vows.”
“You’re right,” I said softly.
The door opened, and Reese followed Louisiana inside. Cigarette hanging from the corner of his mouth, Reese set my bag on the table.
“You two bonding?” he asked, taking cigarette in hand.
Jinx glowered at him.
Louisiana stepped next to Reese. I’d never seen him look so pitiful. Misery dampened his usual rowdiness. His eyes were black, scratches marred his neck, and bruises dotted his face.
I didn’t mean to stare, but his injuries shocked me. I saw no sign of a struggle, yet they must’ve had an epic battle.
“Jinx—”
She growled and Louisiana held up his hands.
“Den…babe. Morning’s going to be here soon enough. If you go with your daddy, you’re going to take my fucking heart with you.”
She wrapped her arms around her stomach. “I can’t take what you don’t have.”
Dropping to his knees, he captured her gaze. “I’m begging you, Jinx,” he whispered.
“No, you fucking asshole,” she shrieked. “No, no, no. Beg, plead, cry, bleed, break, die . I don’t care.”
She jumped to her feet and disappeared down the same hallway as earlier. A moment later, a door slammed.
“Told you, fuckhead,” Reese said calmly. He nodded to me. “Come on, sweetheart. Let’s get you to bed.”