Chapter 28 #3
He shrugged. “For not shutting the door in my face when I first showed up with the proposal. For agreeing to work on this. For making it a success.” A pause.
“For still talking to me. For dancing with me right now.” His voice dropped, softer.
“For not looking at me like I’m an insect you can’t stand. ” A wry smile. “Take your pick.”
A laugh escaped me, surprising us both. “I’d forgotten about that.” I shook my head, the memory of my early contempt feeling distant, almost foreign.
When I looked up, he was watching me with an intensity that stole my breath.
“For still smiling,” he added, his voice low. “And laughing with me.”
We slowed further, then stopped altogether, standing close in the quiet hallway, the muffled music a distant backdrop.
“You’re giving me too much credit,” I said, my voice quiet in the space between us. “I’m good at my job. I’ll take all the compliments I get because of it. But you do know I didn’t make this a success alone, right? I wouldn’t be standing here if you hadn’t fought with Mrs. Garcia.”
A faint smile touched his lips.
“You guys are the ones who did the work.” I held his eyes, willing him to hear me. “You and Liam. You’re the story. I just made sure everyone heard it.”
His hand tightened on my waist. His eyes softened, something sad and searching moving behind them. He took a step closer, close enough that I could feel the warmth of him, smell the faint trace of his cologne.
“Alessia, I—”
The alarm rang.
Sharp. Insistent. Five minutes gone.
He cursed under his breath and fumbled for his phone, silencing it. When he looked up, he was smiling, but it didn’t quite reach his eyes.
“I’d escort you out,” he said.
I started walking toward the exit. “Shouldn’t you go back inside? Make sure everything’s still running smoothly?”
He fell into step beside me, close enough that our shoulders almost brushed. “Liam’s got it.” A glance my way. “I needed a break anyway.”
We walked in silence. Outside, I texted my driver. The car pulled up. Before I could reach for the handle, Cassian was there, opening the door for me.
I murmured my thanks and turned to slide inside.
His hand came up, resting on the doorframe above my head. Blocking me. He stepped into my space, close enough that I had to tilt my head back to meet his eyes.
“I lied.”
I stilled. My brows rose. “About?”
“Yesterday.” His voice was steady, but I could hear the tremor underneath.
“When you said things were civil between us. That we shouldn’t mess it up.
” He held my gaze, his eyes open and vulnerable.
“I said I understood. But I don’t. I don’t want to understand.
I don’t want things to be civil with us.
” A pause. He shook his head, correcting himself.
“Wait. I heard it. I meant—I don’t want things to be just civil between us. I want more. I want us to be more.”
My breath caught.
“Cassian—”
“I know.”
He took another step closer, the space between us shrinking to something intimate, dangerous.
“I know there’s no reason for you to want that too. No reason for you to want that with me.” His voice was rough with feeling. “But you’re it for me. There’s no Cassian without Alessia. There just isn’t.”
His voice softened, dropping into memory. “I was fine before I met you. I woke up, went to work, stressed about keeping everything from falling apart. I ate, I slept, I functioned. It was enough.” He paused. “But then I met you.”
His eyes closed. And a smile—a reverent, private, beautiful smile—took over his face.
I wanted to know what he was seeing. What memory played behind his eyelids that made him glow like that. What version of me lived in his mind, vivid and real.
When he opened his eyes, they were glistening.
“I still did all the same things after meeting you,” he said softly. “But now, whenever I woke up, you were the first person my mind went to. I ate with you. I smiled with you. I laughed with you.” He swallowed. “I lived with you. I am me when I’m with you, Alessia.”
My heart squeezed. A physical pressure in my chest, painful and sweet all at once.
“I made so many wrong choices.” He looked down, shame and regret painting his features.
“I was so selfish. Such an asshole. I should have found a balance before. Should have seen what Cassandra felt and dealt with it. Should have done something about my tunnel vision.” His voice caught.
“Should have told you about my work problems. My—” He swallowed hard, his jaw working.
“My not being able to say certain words problems.”
His voice shook as he continued. “I should have done so many things differently. But I didn’t. And here we are.”
He looked up, and this time his eyes were filled with tears—not falling yet, just gathered, waiting.
One escaped. Traced a slow path down his cheek.
My hand moved before I could stop it. Before I could think, before I could decide whether this was wise or dangerous or anything at all. My fingers found his skin, gentle, and wiped the tear away.
He leaned into the touch, his eyes fluttering closed for just a moment, and then his hand came up to cover mine, pressing my palm more firmly against his skin.
“Alessia.” His voice was a whisper, but it went through me like a current, raising goosebumps along my arms.
“What I feel for you,” he whispered, “it’s never going away. I will always feel it.” His thumb traced circles on the back of my hand. “Even if you turn around today and decide you don’t want anything to do with me. Even if you send me on a thousand weird errands—”
A laugh escaped me. He smiled at the sound, a flicker of joy through the tears.
“Even if one day I frustrate you so much you want to use that sword of yours or if you actually do end up using it. My feelings are never going away.” He held my gaze, fierce and tender. “Things will never be just civil between us because of that.”
He turned his head slightly and kissed my palm.