Chapter Twenty-Three #3
Covering her trembling lips, Hadley bent down too, taking Lucy’s hands.
“Listen to me, Lucy. If it’s okay by me, you’re allowed to speak to anyone I know, okay?
Unless Mommy tells you, I don’t care who it is, you don’t listen.
Look at me, Lucy.” She cupped Lucy’s cheeks with tears spilling over them.
“I’m your mother, and if I say you can, you can.
” I saw Hadley nudge her head in my direction right before Lucy nodded and wrapped her arms around her neck and cried louder.
“Now, do you want Elijah to take us to get ice cream?” A strong head nod from Lucy even though I couldn’t see her face smooshed into her mom’s shoulder. “Okay, then we will.”
“What’s wrong?” I didn’t know who I was asking.
They both had me sick to my stomach with worry.
I couldn’t bear to see either of them cry.
When neither answered, I tapped Lucy’s shoulder.
“Lucy…” Her ignoring me messed with my head.
I was terrified. I never realized the power a parent could have on a kid, even one that didn’t seem worthy of that title.
“Let me get my shoes.” Lucy pulled away from her mom, wiping and hiding tears from me as she walked around me.
I glanced to Hadley desperately. All she did was give me a weak smile as she stood. “Let me change Eli real quick.”
“Can you help me?” It took me a moment to realize Lucy was talking to me since she hadn’t been her usual self with me. I reached for her pink shoes.
“Yeah. Sit down.” She flopped onto her butt watching me as I tied up her shoes. “Want to go on down to the truck while your mom gets Eli ready?” I asked just to see what she said. She nodded and stood with me. “We’re heading down to the truck,” I called out to Hadley.
“Okay! All I have to do is grab my shoes and Eli’s diaper bag.”
Lucy reached for my hand as we headed out the door. It surprised me, especially since she was barely talking to me, but I grabbed onto her tiny one like it was a lifeline—desperate to get her smile back.
“Know what makes me happy?” I mumbled as we took our time walking down the steps.
“What?” She blinked at me with sea-blue eyes like her mother’s.
“When you smile.” And slowly, but surely, Lucy did just that, gripping my hand tightly.
“I didn’t want to,” Lucy murmured, and I glanced down at her.
“Didn’t want to what? ”
“Listen to Dad.”
“Why?”
“He said he didn’t want us around you.” She was sniffling again.
“Called Mom names and told me not to talk to you, or he’d be mad.
That’s why I hate going to Meme Lilly’s.
Dad just takes me there and leaves me with her.
She says bad stuff about Mommy, and it makes me cry.
” I scooped her up. She was crying too hard to walk.
She wrapped those little arms around my neck, and I wondered how any adult could live with themselves for making her cry.
“Everything’s different. I don’t want to go there anymore, but Mom says I should because Daddy misses me. ”
“As long as your mom lets me, I’ll always be your friend Lucy. I promise.”
_______
Lucy ran up the stairs in front of us. She wasn’t back to her normal spunky self, but it was coming back. We made a short trip to get ice cream and pizza—Lucy’s choice. I carried both boxes while Hadley carried Eli.
“You’re exhausted,” I said to her.
Hadley sighed, offering me a small upturned mouth. “Only mentally. Today’s been draining.”
“I’m not leaving until we talk about that,” I warned her.
She only laughed. “I didn’t think you would.”
Feeling relieved, I smirked.
I’d admit that I couldn’t pay attention to the movie Lucy put on for us.
I was too focused on them. That night differed from any other I spent at Hadley’s.
There wasn’t much talking or laughter, but Hadley had still asked me there.
Lucy nodded off next to me, snuggled under some blankets.
Hadley’s feet were underneath her ass as she held Eli in her arms, letting him whack her in the head with some sort of toy over and over as she watched the screen.
She caught me staring at her and grinned.
“It’s time,” she mumbled right before she flopped Eli in my lap.
I stiffened as fear sliced into me. Immediately after, I couldn’t help but think, Shit, he really is a butterball.
“Relax.” She laughed as she leaned against the couch’s arm, watching me, and I was watching Eli who was holding his head up perfectly staring up at me.
Suddenly he threw his hands into the air and cried.
Fucking hell. I broke him.
I started to give him back when Hadley scooted into my side, almost like she was snuggling into me.
Maybe I’d hold him after all.
Hadley took Eli’s hand and cooed softly to him. “It’s okay, see? Elijah’s afraid too. You’ve got to be the big, brave one and show him it’s okay.”
“I don’t want to hurt him,” I told her desperately hoping she’d save me from myself.
“Elijah, you won’t hurt him. Do you know how terrified I was to hold Lucy when they first put her in my arms? If you’d just give in, I know you’d be a goner. That petrified feeling you have means you can be great at this.”
“Be great at what?” I croaked.
“Taking care of babies.”
“I’m capable of taking care of a lot more than babies.” Lights bounced off her face from the TV, making my heart thump wildly.
“Let’s see how you handle Eli then,” she mumbled as she laid her head against my shoulder.
Throughout the last bit of the movie, I shared a staring contest with Eli.
That was all that happened since I wasn’t sure how to talk to a baby yet.
Eli either gave into me holding him or sleep, I wasn’t sure exactly which.
That didn’t matter, though. Eli sprawled out on my chest, oddly adorable and comfortable.
Lucy’s feet rested against my left side and Hadley curled up against my other side.
Since everyone was asleep, did that mean I didn’t have to leave? I knew I could fall asleep instantly right here even though I was sitting up. I’ve never been more comfortable. If she asked, I could say I dozed off.