Chapter Forty-Nine #2
We showered and changed. Dusty held my hand as we walked down the street. I was wearing slacks and a navy knitted turtleneck, though I had my usual trenchcoat and the hat he’d gotten me.
He wore jeans, a grey henley shirt, and a puffer jacket, along with the Nordic print beanie I bought him.
We were that kind of a couple, weren’t we? But was it a bad thing?
“Do you like it there? I’ll put you on my membership if you do. You don’t have to go with me. In fact, they have alpha-free times. Oh, and they have ladies night. It could be fun. You could make some friends,” he offered.
Friends. Perhaps I should make some.
“I think I’d like that,” I replied.
We came upon a cute little deli. The smell of fresh bread made my mouth water. There was a case of baked goods, too.
In the corner there were a few men in suits eating lunch and talking. Probably mafia. But there were plenty of ordinary-seeming people having lunch or standing in line to order.
This wasn’t some mere front. This was a thriving business.
“See! I’m up there. I’ve been up there for a little while now. I still can’t believe it.” He pointed to a wall of framed pictures, who I guessed were celebrities of some sort.
There was a photo of him on stage, shirtless, one hand on his equipment, the other in the air.
“That’s pretty incredible,” I replied.
That was my mate.
“What do you recommend?” I looked up at the menu on the wall.
“The grilled ham and cheese is good, so are the meatball sandwiches. You might like the paninis," he suggested.
Oh, a grilled sandwich did sound good.
Zia was an older, but not old, Italian woman with dark hair, and eyes that missed nothing. “Dusty! Who do we have here?”
Her eyes focused on me, and I could tell in that moment I was being assessed in a multitude of ways.
“This is my mate, Saoirse O’Halloran,” he introduced.
“Very nice to meet you. I do believe we should discuss something very briefly in private,” I said softly in Italian.
“Are you ordering lunch or are you just here for a chat?” she asked.
“We had a good workout at the gym. We need food.” Dusty proceeded to order two large sandwiches, several cookies, and a drink.
“I’d like the grilled ham and cheese, extra pickles, a lemonade, and a cookie, please,” I ordered.
Dusty paid for our meal, and she disappeared in the back. When she came out, a young man was with her and he took the register.
She nodded towards the back, and I went around the counter, and followed her. There were all sorts of meats and cheeses, and a meat slicer. Another young man was busy making orders that appeared on a screen. It was very clean and smelled delicious.
We walked right past all of that into a storeroom filled with the types of things a deli might need that were non-perishable.
“What exactly do you have to say to me that you can’t say in front of your mate?” Her arms crossed over her ample chest. It wasn’t unkind, but it was wary.
“I could say it in front of Dusty, but it’s not knowledge for public consumption,” I replied in Italian.
“Boston?” she asked.
“I’m from Clan O’Halloran in Ireland. I do not represent them. I’m not working for them. I have simply moved to New York to be with Dusty. I’m not here for any other reason. Nor do I plan on engaging in any sort of politics or fanfare,” I replied, trying to choose my words carefully.
“I see. What business are you?” she asked.
“Technically, I work for the Company,” I said quietly. “But again, I’m here for Dusty, not business.”
“Oh.” Her look changed to one of respect–then concern. “Does he know? He’s a nice boy.”
“We met because he interrupted one of my hits with his social media shenanigans. He’s known from the very beginning,” I replied.
She started laughing. “That’s Dusty. I will need to pass this on to my brother.”
“As you should. If he has any questions I’m available. I’m not here as a threat. I’m not moving in on any territory,” I reassured. “But I’m not an asset, either.”
“I see. I wish you and Dusty all happiness. Is there anyone else I should be concerned about?” she added.
“There is an omega in our pack. You don’t need to worry about her family, but she is part of the Order of the Black Dahlia. Again, she’s not here for business. Her mates are part of our pack,” I added, wanting to cover everything.
She took a deep breath, the kind that was usually followed by, Grant me patience. “Oh, an Order omega. Goodness.”
“I’ll try to keep her out of as much trouble as I can.” Which members of the Order had she come across for that particular reaction?
“I appreciate that, but I also understand that it can be a bit of an impossible task. Thank you for making yourself known to us.”
We came back out. Dusty was busy talking to the younger man. Someone brought out our food.
Dusty and I sat down at a table. I ate an entire pickle and drank half of my lemonade.
“Carlos’ ex has been blowing up group chats again. When you’re out with Fiona, keep an extra eye out for her in case she tries to cause any trouble. Well, Fiona can absolutely handle herself, but we really don’t need her punching anyone.” He took a bite of his meatball sandwich.
“Of course.” I took a bite of sandwich.
“Question. Do you have anyone who might think that they have some claim to you, or someone that we need to deal with before they show up and make trouble? I don’t. I mean, you’re the only person I’ve been with regularly for some time, but you know, people are weird.” He shrugged.
“Fiona has been my serious partner for a few years now, and you’re the only dick I’ve had for a while.” I took another bite of my sandwich. This was really good. It might be the bread.
He thought for a moment, and anxiety hit me through the bond.
“Did Fiona knock you up?” he blurted.
I froze half a pickle in my hand. “I’m on birth control. As are you.”
“Have you ever thought that perhaps the reason why you might not be feeling so well is that you might have the nine month flu?” He very gently reached over and squeezed my hand.
“The nine month flu?” I frowned and then I got it. Shite. “Wouldn’t it be too soon for me to know?”
“I mean, I think you can know before your period. Have you gotten one lately? Deltas get them monthly, right?” he asked.
“We do, but I’m on the kind of birth control where you don’t get it at all. Changing your tampon when working is a pain,” I replied.
Oh no. Some drugs messed with birth control. No. No. No.
“It’s too early for you to smell it.” My voice broke.
“I get little wisps. Especially when you sweat. I also kinda feel something, in the bond,” he added.
Everything he said felt true.
He took both my hands in his. “It’s okay. After this, we’ll go to the drugstore and get a pregnancy test. You can think about things and we’ll figure it out. Unless you just want to go to the clinic now. Afterwards, I’ll take you home and make you soup and hold you.”
“You would do that?” I asked. An alpha not immediately laying claim to his mate’s child? What?
“It’s your body. Your career. I’d like to think we’d be amazing parents, and I’m all for starting a family now. But if it’s not something you’re ready for, then I’ll support your choice,” he replied.
Oh.
“Would you want to be a father and have children with me?” I tried to gauge if any of what he said was because he wasn’t ready.
“I’d love to. When you’re ready and not a moment before,” he assured, the bond flooding with love. “It’s okay to feel conflicted. I don’t think anyone else in the pack has figured it out yet.”
It shouldn’t surprise me that Dusty would say and mean such things.
“You’re welcome to discuss anything you want with me. Ultimately this is your decision, and don’t let anyone ever think otherwise,” he added.
My chest felt really tight. Could I really be pregnant? It made a lot of sense…
Also, the way he phrased it was funny. Fiona didn’t knock me up. He did. I was carrying Dusty’s baby.
I was carrying BroKen’s chaotic spawn.
Shite.
My breathing grew hard. Dusty stood, picked me up, and sat back down in my chair, with me on his lap, as he wrapped his arms around me tightly.
And I let him.
“Breathe. I know. I can feel it all. I’ve got you. I’ve got you harder than I’ve ever had anything in my life.” His voice went rough, as love and devotion continued to bombard me.
With every day that passed I felt something grow between us. I’d meant it when I said that if I let myself, I could love him.
And I did.
I turned, so I could press my face into his shoulder, and I clutched onto him, letting his balsam scent wrap around me, and his emotions overpower me until my breathing slowed.
He didn’t even say anything, just stroked my hair and held me.
“Are we even ready to be parents? Do you know what kind of kid we’ll have?” I looked up into his eyes.
“A musical, fun, and resilient one. But again, it’s okay not to be ready. We can wait, or have kids unready. Plenty of people do. Whatever you want,” he assured.
I exhaled heavily. “We should probably do a test.”
“We can do that. Do you want to finish eating your sandwich or would you like me to pack everything up?” he asked.
I thought for a moment. “Can we just pack everything up?”
Yes, I needed to see the data before I completely spiraled.
“I’ll get a sack. Do you want another pickle?” he asked.
“Yes.” I nodded.
He gave me a kiss, placed me back on the chair, and went over to the front counter.
I finished the rest of my pickle that I’d abandoned on a napkin.
He came back with a paper sack, and something wrapped in foil. Dusty gathered everything up.
We left the deli and walked down the street, his arm around my waist. I leaned into him, taking the comfort he offered.
This whole thing was unsettling.
“I drank. We did drugs…” Worry shot through me.
“If you keep the baby, we’ll go to the doctor and have everything checked. You’re not the first person to party hard before you knew. There’s also that vitamin shot Compass BioTek has developed for that specific reason,” he told me.
“How do you even know about that?” I’d never heard of it.