Chapter 12
What am I doing?
Last night was amazing—everything I ever dreamed of.
But this morning, in Deacon’s warm bed, I’m not sure anymore.
Will he still want me now? Was the goal just to get me into bed?
What is this between us?
I’m a raging inferno for him. Despite the past, I’ve been sucked back into this man’s vortex and I’ve let myself be free. But was that a good idea?
I know I’m prone to overthinking but even now as I’m snuggled down in Deacon’s arms, doubt penetrates my thoughts.
Raising the duvet, I wriggle out from underneath it. As my feet touch the ground, a large, warm arm wraps around my waist and pulls me backward.
“Where do you think you”re going?” he rasps in my ear.
“I … I …”
“Come back here. I’m not finished with you.” He plants kisses on my bare shoulder.
My eyelids flutter and I lean against him.
“Lay down with me. I’m having you for breakfast.”
I laugh as I lie down and his hand trails down my leg. “Deacon.”
“I love it when you say my name.”
His blue eyes suck me in as his fingers get closer and closer to the spot I want him to touch. I roll my hips, and a smile crosses his lips.
“I love it when you touch me,” I whisper.
He slowly drags his index finger over my clit. “Touch you like that?”
I nod.
“I love touching you.”
His fingers make light work of my orgasm, and while I’m still floating, he rolls over and slides into me.
“You and me. We’re good together. And I have every intention of being with you for as long as you want me.”
I even my breathing out before answering, “Forever, then?”
Deacon’s lips curl into a smile. “Sounds good to me.”
This time, he slows everything down. His kisses are tender, and he loves my breasts, nuzzling and licking my nipples while he moves inside me.
I want this. I want it all the time with him.
I’ve never been one to move fast, but this just feels right. Maybe the fact that I’ve loved him for years has altered my perspective but being with Deacon is everything I ever hoped for.
“You feel so good,” he moans before that final thrust and he collapses, resting his head between my breasts.
I love you.
It’s on the tip of my tongue, but I want him to be the first to say it.
He rolls off me and lies on his back before rolling toward me and reaching for my hand.
“Where were you going this morning?” he asks.
I bite my bottom lip. “Home.”
His brows pinch. “Sneaking off without saying goodbye?”
Nodding, I try and avoid his eyes but it’s just too hard. “I wasn’t sure if you would want me to hang around.”
“Where did you get that idea?”
The intensity of his gaze makes me shrink back. “I … someone told me you weren’t one for relationships. She said?—”
“Who said?” His voice is calm but his left eyebrow twitches, his annoyance right under the surface.
“Mallory.” It’s barely a whisper, but he hears because his anger flares for just a moment in his eyes before the softness reappears.
“She’s Garrett’s ex, and she looks out for all of us. Sounds like she got a little over-zealous. Probably to protect you.”
“Do I need protecting?”
He grins. “Not in the way she thinks you do.”
I bark out a laugh.
“I’m crazy about you, Pippa. There is no one else. Mallory’s made me out to be worse than I really have been.” He sighs, running his thumb down my cheek. “I can’t deny there have been women in the past, but none who I’ve had this connection with. It sounds messed up because I’ve known you since we were kids, but I feel like I’ve been waiting my whole life for you.”
Tears well in my eyes, and I smile through them because is what I’ve always wanted to hear. My heart’s gone from being so empty to full as his words wash over me. “I’m sorry I doubted you.”
“I don’t know what this is between us, but I want it so badly. You, me, endless nights in my bed. Spending days together. All of it.”
I swallow hard. “That’s what I want too.”
He smiles. “How about I make us breakfast and then we have a lazy day together?”
“That sounds perfect.”