Chapter 17
Chapter Seventeen
Preston
Iwoke up with the morning song of the birds in the trees outside. It was early, the dawn just starting to streak through the window. My body was stiff and cramped, but there was no way I was going to move. Not an inch.
Not with Jess still in my arms.
Her chest rose and fell in the gentle rhythm of sleep. She was curled up against me, her hair spilling over the arm I had wrapped around her. I mentally cursed myself for falling asleep at all and missing even one second of this night with her.
The fire in the old wood stove had burned itself down to embers in the night, but Summit was still stretched out in front of it, content with whatever warmth it was still providing. The cabin was quiet in that perfect pre-dawn way right before the world woke up.
I wanted to stay in this moment forever. But even letting myself think about the way I wished our night wouldn’t end was trouble, and I knew it.
Jess wasn’t mine. She’d needed a night of forgetting, and I’d given it to her. That was it.
Nothing more.
Bullshit.
Every moment of the night before replayed in my head, whether I wanted it to or not. And it wasn’t just the sex. Although that was impossible to ignore. It was the way she’d looked at me afterward. So completely open and unguarded.
And that was the part that mattered. And exactly why I couldn’t pretend that any of this was simple.
I’d spent a lifetime wanting Jess Anderson and convincing myself I hated her because I could never have her. But now that I had…it was more than just a one-night stand.
At least for me.
But she’d not just ended a relationship—she’d run from it moments before she was meant to walk down the aisle.
That was not a small thing. No matter how wrong it had been with Trevor and every single reason why she never should have been with him, let alone entertained the idea of being his wife, it still couldn’t be ignored.
She’d been about to step into a life with that man. Never mind their financial entanglements. Any way you looked at it, it wasn’t something you walked away from cleanly.
And you certainly didn’t jump into something new only hours later.
And that’s exactly why I needed to get up and move on.
I moved back carefully, easing my arm out from under her in an effort not to wake her. She made a small sound and shifted backward, pinning me into the wall. My chest tightened at how natural it all felt.
I stayed where I was, letting her sleep for a few more minutes. Every instinct in me wanted to pull her closer and tell her how I really felt about her and how those feelings had only exploded to life in the last few hours with her.
But that would be beyond selfish. And at least for now, it couldn’t be about what I wanted.
I wanted her.
But that wasn’t enough. Not now.
I sucked in a breath, steeling myself before pushing myself up and jumping from the bed in one, almost smooth motion. The cot jostled and squeaked behind me, but I didn’t look back as I crossed the floor and found my jeans. It wasn’t until I tugged them on that I turned to look at her.
Jess had her head propped up on one hand, the sleeping bag pulled up over her chest, her hair wild and untamed. She looked like sex, desire, and temptation all rolled into one.
“Good morning,” she said, her voice laced with sleep. Her lips curled up into a small smile.
I swallowed hard and bent down to scratch the puppy’s ears to keep me from running straight back to the cot and her deliciously warm body. “Good morning,” I said after a moment. “Did you get some sleep?”
“Not much.” Her smile widened. “But I’m not complaining.”
Damn, she was making this difficult, and she didn’t even realize it.
“Jess…” I stood and rubbed my palms on my jeans. “I think we should—”
“Oh! Summit!”
The puppy had noticed her and had launched his furry little body onto the cot to greet her with big kisses.
Jess laughed as she tried to wrestle the puppy into submission. By the time she had him calmed down, she sat upright, the sleeping bag dangerously close to slipping off her chest completely, the puppy curled up in her lap.
“Sorry about that.” I moved to take Summit from her, but she held him protectively.
“Don’t you dare,” she said. “I finally got him calmed down. Besides, he’s cute, and there’s a rule about not moving when you have a puppy on your lap.”
I crossed my arms over my chest. “I thought that was about sleeping cats.”
She shrugged. “Either way, I probably shouldn’t disrupt him right now.”
I took a moment to gather up her ridiculous white jogging suit, only briefly debating on whether or not I should pull each and every rhinestone off before giving it back to her.
Ultimately, I deposited the clothing in a heap next to her. “Trying to avoid going back, are you?”
She nodded, the smile sliding off her face for the first time since waking. I cursed myself for being the cause of it, but at the same time, it wasn’t my fault. Not really.
“I could go back with you,” I offered before truly considering it.
“Ha!” That made her laugh. “Can you imagine if I rolled up with you next to me? The gossip mill would lose its mind.”
“You mean Tilley Beckett would lose her mind?”
“Isn’t that what I said?” She laughed again before it faded away. She grew quiet, her fingers absently combing through Summit’s fur. The puppy let out a contented sigh and settled deeper into her lap as if he, too, didn’t want her to leave.
“I should go,” she said finally. “I can’t really put it off forever, can I?”
“You could try,” I teased in an effort to bring that smile back. “I’m about to make some coffee.” I’d only brought enough coffee for one, but I’d happily sacrifice my morning cup if it meant she’d stay a little longer.
For a moment, I thought she might agree, but I saw the second her decision was made.
She shook her head and reached for her clothes.
I turned my back to give her privacy, which seemed a little ridiculous after the night we’d just spent together, but everything was always different in the light of day.
Even if I wished it wasn’t.
I didn’t turn around until she spoke again. “This was…”
She was standing, the puppy on the floor at her feet.
The white “Bride” jogging suit looked even more out of place now.
Jess tugged the tangle of her hair back as best she could and wrapped an elastic around it.
She looked so different with the makeup gone, her hair off her face, and that pink glow on her cheeks that I’d put there.
Even more gorgeous, if it were possible.
I busied myself by tugging my own shirt on to keep from going to her and pulling her into my arms again for one more kiss.
“Thank you,” she said. “For last night and …” She waved a hand in the air, unsure how to finish the sentence.
For not being an asshole.
For being a safe place to crash.
For making me come so hard, I screamed.
For doing it over and over again until I forgot everything.
“Well,” she continued, shattering the illusion of my suggestions. “Thank you for being there for me, Preston. I don’t really know…well, it’s hard to—”
“You don’t have to thank me,” I said. “I told you before, and I’ll tell you again, Jess. I’ve got you. I’ll always…well, whatever you need, okay?”
She smiled at that. It was soft and a little sad, and I hated that she was about to walk out of here to face everything alone. But she was right. Showing up with me would only make things a thousand times worse.
“You sure you know the way back?”
“I think so. If I follow the main trail, it’ll take me to the lodge, right?”
I nodded. “It could be slow going with all that rain last night. Are you—”
“I’ll be okay.” She stopped me before I could suggest going with her again.
I nodded and followed her to the door. I waited while she bent down to pat Summit’s head. The puppy whined as if he knew exactly what her leaving meant.
“I’ll see you again,” she said to the dog before straightening up and looking in my eyes. “I promise.”
The puppy wasn’t convinced, and when she opened the door to step out, he whined again, louder this time. I felt it in my chest.
She paused with her hand on the latch and looked back at me. For a second, I was sure she was going to throw herself in my arms and kiss me again. Maybe tell me that she didn’t want it to end, she wanted more than one night.
But she didn’t.
“See you around, Preston.”
I nodded. “At the committee meeting.”
She flinched a little. “Right.”
The door closed behind her with a soft click, and Summit trotted back to me, confused and staring at the door as if he expected her to walk back in. When she didn’t, he whined and nipped at my leg.
I patted him and shook my head. “Yeah, buddy,” I muttered. “I know what you mean.”
Jess
The ride back to the lodge took much longer than my escape had. The muddy trails were partly to blame, of course, but the farther away from Preston I got, the slower I pedaled, not wanting to go back to the mess I knew I was walking into.
Without my phone or any other communication, I had no idea what was waiting for me at the lodge or whether Trevor had gone back to his rented Airbnb or even to the city.
Without a lot of options, I rode the bike to the impressive front doors and left it with the doorman before going inside. Fortunately, there weren’t many people around. I didn’t need a mirror to know how I must look. Never mind what people were probably saying about me.
But I couldn’t care about that. Not yet.
With my head held as high as I could manage, I went to the front desk. The young woman who’d checked me into my bridal suite the day before recognized me immediately. It probably didn’t hurt that I was still wearing that stupid jogging suit, now adorned with plenty of mud.
“Ms. Anderson, good morning.”
I managed a smile and a nod. “I don’t suppose anyone—”
“Your friends left a package for your return.” She gave me a kind smile.
I breathed a sigh of relief and sent up a silent thank-you to my girlfriends when the desk clerk slid a large envelope containing my phone and car keys across the desk.
“Thank you,” I told the girl. “Also, I borrowed a bike yesterday.” My cheeks flushed. “I left it with the doorman. If you happen to know who it might belong to, I’d like to thank them with a gift card or—”
“It’s not necessary.” She cut me off and waved away my apology. “We’ll make sure the bike is returned to the owner.” She gave me another kind smile that I was beyond grateful for.
“Thank you,” I said genuinely, and slipped out into the parking lot.
I waited until I was home, a cup of coffee in hand, freshly showered and changed, the white jogging suit in the trash, before I turned on my phone.
As expected, the screen blew up with missed calls and messages.
My parents.
Charli. Harper. Kat.
And of course, Trevor.
I skipped everyone else and clicked on his name.
Trevor:
Jess? Where are you?
Is everything okay? We can talk about this.
Everyone is waiting, Jess! Stop fucking around.
Charli just told me you weren’t coming. What the fuck?
Jess!!
Do you know how embarrassing this is?
Do you know what this means? The investors are here!
CALL ME!
I lowered the phone to my lap and looked up, taking a breath. I took a long sip of coffee before picking up my phone again and clicking on the group chat with my girlfriends. I skipped reading any of the messages and scrolled to the bottom to leave my own.
Jess:
Thank you for my phone, keys, and…everything! I’m home now. I’ll fill you all in, but I need to call Trevor first.
The responses came right away. But I didn’t click over to read any of them. I couldn’t put it off much longer. No matter what I was feeling—and to be completely truthful, I wasn’t entirely sure what I was feeling anymore—I needed to talk to Trevor.
I pressed the button to call him and blew out a breath.
My gut clenched when he picked up on the first ring. “Jess? What the hell? Where are you? Are you at home? I’m coming—”
“Trevor.” I cut him off. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have—”
“You shouldn’t have done a lot of things, Jess.”
His voice was laced with venom. I’d heard him upset before, but never so angry. And never had that been directed at me.
“I’m in the car. I’ll be there in five minutes.”
He hung up on me before I could object. And really, as much as I didn’t want to deal with the fallout of my decision, I was a grown-up, and I couldn’t put it off forever.
I took another fortifying sip of coffee before texting my parents with the assurance that I was fine and I’d call them later to explain. On a whim, I quickly texted Preston.
Jess:
I made it home okay. Thank you again. I really…
What? I needed that? I did. But that seemed so inadequate.
One night with Preston had made me feel things I’d never felt before. And it wasn’t just about feeling wanted and desired. It went deeper than that.
But I couldn’t type that in a text.
Could I?
Why not?
I focused on the screen again and finished the text.
…needed that.
I hit Send before I could talk myself out of it and tossed my phone down right as there was a knock on the door.