Chapter 19
Chapter Nineteen
Jess
The bricks in the plaza in front of the Bean Bag were still wet from the early morning rain. The air was cool and sharp. I breathed in the earthy, fresh smell, letting it ground me for the meeting that was about to happen. The last few days had been a lot. I was exhausted.
And not just from dealing with the whole wedding fallout and the dozens of conversations that had come from it. My parents had been more understanding than I could have hoped.
Once I explained that the relationship with Trevor hadn’t been what I thought it was—and that I’d stayed longer than I should have because of the development and the money tied up in it—they’d gone quiet.
My mom cried. My dad swore under his breath.
They told me they wished I’d said something sooner. That they never wanted me to feel trapped. That we’d figure out the rest together.
I believed them. Mostly.
But that didn’t stop the weight of it all from sitting heavy in my chest.
The chats I’d had with my friends were much different, of course. They wanted to know the details of where I’d been. I hated lying to them, but I couldn’t bring myself to tell them about Preston. Not yet. Not when I still didn’t know how I felt about it.
That was a lie.
I knew exactly how I felt. I just didn’t want to say it out loud.
Not to them.
Not to myself.
“Hey.”
As if I conjured him, Preston turned the corner, looking casually handsome in hiking shorts, a T-shirt, and sandals.
The exact opposite of anything Trevor would even think about wearing.
He made my stomach flip. Especially when he ran his hand through his hair, leaving it stuck up at very cute, and very odd angles.
“Hey, yourself.”
Over the last few days, I’d thought about what it would be like to see Preston again, after what we’d shared. Every time I pictured it, my imagination instantly went to a very dirty and inappropriate place.
I swallowed hard and pulled my eyes from his mouth and the lips that had brought me so much pleasure. Before I could let myself go too far down that line of thought, I crouched to greet Summit, who jumped up on my legs, his tongue hanging out.
“I think he missed you,” Preston said while I scratched the puppy’s ears and tried to ignore the way my heart raced.
“Just him?” The words slipped out before I could stop them.
“No.” Preston’s answer was immediate. “Not just him,” he said without a trace of humor.
Reluctantly, I left the puppy alone and stood slowly.
“How’ve you been?” he asked. “I mean…how did it all go? You okay?”
After that last text the day we’d returned, I’d resisted the urge to text or call Preston at all. I thought it might be easier that way to keep our relationship…well, friendly.
It seemed kind of ridiculous, really, but I needed to have some boundaries.
Didn’t I?
“Okay,” I said honestly. “Mom and Dad took it better than I thought they would. And the girls were…well, they already knew, so—”
“And him?” Preston didn’t bother hiding the contempt in his voice. “What did he say? Was he mad?”
“He wasn’t happy.” I shrugged.
Preston nodded. “You know I’m here for you if you ever—”
“I know,” I interrupted him, unsure whether I wanted to hear the way he ended the sentence.
“Right.” He glanced toward the Bean Bag. Through the window, we could see the others already sitting at a table; we were the last to arrive. No doubt they were all watching our interaction. Tilley was probably taking detailed notes. “We should probably get in there.”
I nodded. Besides dealing with the wedding fallout, I’d spent some time trying to work through my thoughts about the development.
It was harder than I thought to separate what I’d learned on the hikes from the planning documents—and from the reality that everything I had was financially tied up in it.
But it was important to the town. I needed to be sure I was doing the right thing.
As difficult as it was, I needed to take my personal feelings out of it.
All of them.
“I’m ready.” I took a deep breath, pulled my shoulders back, and walked through the door Preston held open for me.
Summit ran in under my feet and instantly curled up under the table on Tilley’s feet. I shook my head with a laugh, knowing that Dale, the owner, would only look the other way about a dog in the coffee shop for so long.
“We already got you two drinks,” Chase said. “Sit down so we can get started.”
Ever the businessman, I’m sure it was killing him that we were exactly one minute late.
“Oh, Chase.” Tilley slapped his arm lightly. “It’s a sensitive time for Jess.” She looked at me, concern—or maybe it was curiosity—in her eyes. “You take all the time you need, dear. And if you ever need to talk—”
“Thank you, Tilley.” I cut her off. The last thing I needed was the biggest gossip in town thinking that we were going to have any kind of heart-to-heart. Although I bet it was killing her that she didn’t know the details of my ill-fated wedding day.
I was happy to leave it that way, too.
“I got us a plate of treats.” Becky took her seat and slid a plate of pastries between us.
Chairs scraped as everyone settled in. Preston took the seat across from me, making it hard for me not to look at him.
I focused on my coffee, unsure whether I should make eye contact or not. Would I give it away? Would Tilley or the others notice that something had shifted between us?
Had something shifted between us?
“Okay.” Tilley slid her glasses down her nose and lifted a sparkly pen in the air, ready to take notes on her ever-present clipboard. “Today is the big day,” she continued. “We need to come to a decision that we can present to the town at the meeting. Is everyone ready?”
I let my gaze travel around the table as everyone nodded in agreement. I let my gaze linger on Preston a moment longer than necessary. His lips curled up into a small smile when he caught me looking.
Damn it. His smile had a way of making my stomach flip. I shouldn’t let that happen. Not anymore. Not with everything…
“I hope I did enough to show you all the drawbacks to the development,” Preston said confidently. “When we were on the trails, the impact on the surrounding environment and the animals in the area was clear.”
There were a few nods around the table. I swallowed hard.
“You did a very good job showing us all that,” Chase said. “But I think it’s important to remember that there are some very impressive pros to the proposal and we would be remiss in ignoring those, too.”
I nodded and refocused my attention on the coffee in front of me.
“I think we all know the pros and cons already,” Chase said. “So why don’t we take a minute to go around and say which way we intend to vote. Jess, do you want to start?”
My head shot up.
I took a deep breath. I was confident in my decision. Still.
Whatever happened between Preston and me—and whatever had happened with Trevor—couldn’t factor into this.
This had to be my decision.
“Okay.” I nodded toward Chase. “I’ve spent quite a bit of time reviewing the proposal, as well as all the points we discovered over the course of our hikes.
As you said, there were a lot of great points.
” I didn’t look, but I heard a murmur of approval from Preston.
“However, I strongly feel that the benefits of the proposed development outweigh some of those challenges.”
The table went quiet.
Preston’s head lifted, his eyes locked on mine. His jaw tightened.
I knew he wasn’t going to like what I had to say. “I think we can make a compromise that will satisfy—”
“A compromise?” he snapped. “You’re kidding, right?”
“The residential access can stay limited,” I continued. “The trail reroute can address the erosion concerns, while adding in some buffer zones for the wildlife. I think it might be the—”
He laughed once. Sharp and humorless.
“You have got to be joking.” He shook his head. “You can’t possibly be good with this. Not after—”
“Preston.” My voice came out much steadier than I felt. “I am.”
My words landed heavier than expected.
For a split second, something flickered across his face. Not anger. Not quite.
Disappointment.
And something more.
The group seemed to hold its collective breath.
“This isn’t personal, Preston,” I said carefully.
“Isn’t it?” His jaw flexed. “It sure feels personal.”
No one spoke. Not even Tilley, whose pen hovered uselessly over her clipboard as she watched the scene play out.
I met Preston’s gaze and forced myself not to look away. “It isn’t.”
The silence stretched longer than it should have before Preston pushed his chair back with a scraping loud enough to disturb the puppy, who jumped up with a yelp under the table.
“I think I need some air,” he said, already headed for the door.
“Preston,” Chase called after him. “We need to finish—”
His words were cut off as Preston disappeared out into the plaza, the bell over the door chiming softly as the door closed behind him.
I stayed seated, my hands wrapped around my mug, my heart pounding in a way that had nothing to do with the meeting.
And everything to do with the look on Preston Lyons’s face right before he’d walked away from me.
Preston
I stepped outside the coffee shop before I said something I couldn’t take back.
She was voting yes.
After…after everything.
What the actual fuck?
I dropped my head to my chest and took a few deep breaths, willing the fresh air to fill my lungs as I drew in a shaky breath.
I straightened and paced a few steps away along the edge of the plaza. Thankfully, most of the shops hadn’t opened yet, and there weren’t many people around to witness my crash-out. I needed to rein myself in.
This wasn’t personal, I needed to keep telling myself.
Even if it felt painfully personal.
After everything we’d been through together. After the way we’d…dammit.
It wasn’t about what we’d shared together. It couldn’t be about that.
Even if it felt like it was.