Chapter 18
CALLUM
Not this.
This is why I don’t offer to see anyone on free days. It’s too easy to get trapped in an extra day of work, when the free days are the only rest and time off we get on this job. A job where we have to be on for days at a time, on little sleep, with late nights and early mornings.
But I am supposed to work on being more helpful to the clients; being more Asha-like. Asha would say yes to this. Asha would love the extra time she got to spend with these energy leeches.
So even though this is going to be miserable, I smile and say that we would love to have them along. But the smile might not be as bright as Asha’s always are, because the family takes a collective step back.
Hey, I’m new at this. And it’s not exactly easy, so maybe I should be given credit for the bit that I do accomplish. At least Asha is looking appropriately impressed with my effort. She’s nodding encouragingly and even pats me on the arm.
I send another cheerful look at the family in front of us. See, Asha is impressed with my smile. And sunshine women know smiles. But apparently this smile is even more feral than the other, because it’s one more step back. I abruptly drop the smile.
“Of course we don’t expect you to take us around when we get there, as this is not included with the tour. But we would appreciate you letting us tag along so we don’t get lost,” Jennifer says.
“Of course.” Asha smiles at them, and they smile back. They even take a step toward her.
What is she doing that I’m not? I get it, her smile is beautiful. Stunning. It’s a movement she’s clearly comfortable with because of thousands and thousands of practice smiles. And mine might be a little rusty, but it isn’t exactly rocket science.
Lips curve up. If I’m feeling especially overjoyed, add some teeth.
So why does her smile have such a different effect than mine on the world? Why does her smile have such a different effect on me than anyone else’s?
A damn mystery is what that is.
“I think it’s a right here.” I scratch my head, experiencing one of the worst parts of this job: getting lost in front of strangers who you’re meant to be leading.
I thought I knew where I was going. I haven’t been to this particular historic house, and it has less signs from the train station than most, which is less than ideal, but it’s a damn big house in a small-ish village. How is it so good at hiding?
“I’ll just check.” Asha gets out her phone to use the GPS. Yes, that would have been the smart thing to do. But I wanted to impress her with my ability to direct us without tools.
She swipes at the screen and the technology magic works. “It’s a left, then a right to the back entrance. But the front gate was right outside the station we were at ten minutes ago.” She smiles at me tentatively, probably worried about my reaction to the news.
“Unnecessarily difficult historic site.”
“I didn’t see any signs either.”
Now she’s laughing at me, so whatever my reaction is, she’s enjoying it.
God knows why. It doesn’t bother me as much when it’s Asha laughing at me.
Maybe because the sound of her laugh is so nice I don’t much mind being the reason as much as I normally would.
But I glare at the family in case they get any bright ideas.
They do not have the right to laugh at me.
Armed with the bloody phone robot telling us where to go, we trudge up a small hill, through a street with rows of village cottages, the red brick contrasting with whitewashed walls so bright in the mild English sun that it’s blinding.
We finally reach a back entrance, and I turn to the unwanted parasites, not letting them see my relief.
“Here we are. Ticket office is that way.” I assume.
I don’t know, but they’ll figure it out.
There are people who work here and are getting paid to talk to our tourists today. And none of those people is me.
Asha watches them walk off, still laughing beside me. “You hate this part so much.”
“This part? No. This part is my favorite.” I speak without thinking, meaning that I love the part where the group leaves and I get to explore whatever city I’m in.
Tied with lecturing on the walking tours, at least until the time for questions.
Those can get very ignorant, despite the very false adage that there are no bad questions.
One American asked if it was necessary for me to keep going on about colonization and the destruction it has wrought.
What do you mean? It’s one of the foundations of the United Kingdom as it is today and as well as why other countries are the way they are. Yes, we’re going to talk about it. And no, we’re not going to sugarcoat it either, because that’s just lying with more letters.
Which is why the Q they feel very disrespected.
“So you can probably step back.”
No. The denial shoots through my head without my authorization. And she’s right; there’s no legitimate need to be this close to her. She’s not laughing anymore and the family is gone. But I don’t want to.
“And what if I don’t want to, then?” I don’t step away, but I don’t step closer either. Just because I want to be here, doesn’t mean she wants me here.
So I’ll leave it up to her.