Chapter 47
ASHA
He’s the one who left me, but now he’s here. And I want to know why. I need to know why.
“I might have overreacted on the day of our last trip.”
“Excuse me? You might have overreacted?” Even for Callum, the master of the understatement, this is a bit much. Or not enough.
“Woman, I am trying to apologize.”
“This is your apology? You’ve stalked me to get here, after you left me, and now that you’re here, you gave me flowers, which are nice, but you haven’t actually said the word sorry.”
“I’m trying.”
“You’re failing! You know what? I’m going to help you out here, because this grovel is going atrociously.”
“I didn’t think it was going so bad.” I stare at him until he shifts from side to side. “Well, then. What would you suggest?”
Fine, I’ll direct this for him. “First of all, I need you to be less belligerent.”
He relaxes his face, but he’s still a bit belligerent. I suppress a smile at how grumpy he still is. Even though now I know it’s just a response to him being uncomfortable.
“That’s…better. Now. Why did you run before?”
“I have come to really…respect you. And I didn’t think that someone like you could be happy with someone who saw the world so differently than you. You would try, because you’re so optimistic, but it would make you miserable, which would make me miserable.”
I open my mouth to show my frustration with that word, but he cuts me off to continue.
“And I mean that as a good thing, I promise. I love your optimism, the way you look for the good and fun in every situation. But I worried that it would destroy that precious optimism, being with someone who almost never sees the best. I didn’t want to see the look on your face when I killed it.”
“So what’s changed?”
“Ah. Well, as much pain as I imagined it would be disappointing you, it was nothing compared to the pain I’ve already felt, being apart from you. I need to be with you to be happy. And I didn’t think I needed happiness in my life, but now I know I want it.”
This is too much. I spent weeks mourning a loss of relationship with the man that I love, and now he pops back up because he wants to give it a go?
And I’m starting a business. It’s not exactly the best time. But he has to do it on his terms.
I rub my forehead, a headache already forming. “I can’t…right now. You’re asking a lot, and this event is important, to me and my new business. We can talk later.”
Callum looks crushed, but he steps back. “I understand. Of course. I reacted badly and took the coward’s way out, and I get why you don’t trust me. But I am being honest, finally.”
“How can I trust that?” Because I want to. But I keep being told how naive I am and maybe that’s catching up to me. Especially when he’s already left once.
“I’ll show you that I can be trusted, that I’ve changed. Because I’m not giving up. Unless you tell me to, of course. I’ll respect if you decide you don’t want me.” He takes another step back. “Enjoy your day. You’ve started an amazing company and I wish you all the success with it.”
“Thank you,” I whisper. But he’s already walking away.
I shake my head and walk back to my event. I don’t know how I’m supposed to focus on work now. But I have a new business, so I don’t have any other option.
Two days later
“Mom, I have my first real, not-from-a-person-known-to-me booking!” I dance around my apartment. It’s been a few days since the event and I already have a booking! I’m basically Apple, but for tourism!
“I knew it! Move over Indra Nooyi, my daughter is the new CEO in town!”
I stop dancing. “I don’t even know who that is.”
“She was the CEO of Pepsi. And Indian. But you will out-business her!”
“I have one booking for a weekend of guiding in town. One of my cheapest tours because of the lack of hotel room required for me. I don’t think I’m at the level of a billion-dollar company just yet.”
And they already have lodging, so I don’t even need to organize that. But it’s my first booking! And I have some people making inquiries from the event too, emailing back and forth to see if I can plan a tour for them. A lot already bowed out, but some are still talking.
It’s a start.
“I’ve got to go, Mom. I have to plan a weekend of ‘fun and frivolity with a hint of history’ for this customer and his friends.” And this is a perfect first assignment. Someone who wants to enjoy their vacation and learn a few things along the way.
I tried to get more details out of them, such as likes and dislikes, but they said they liked being surprised and not having to deal with the planning.
All right then, first customer. You’ll get the best weekend I can give you.
Two days later
I wait outside the Scotch Whisky Experience. I thought this would be a nice introduction to a fun weekend, with a hint of educational material.
I offered to meet C.K., the client, at his hotel, but he said they would meet me at the first event. I’m surprisingly nervous, despite doing this same thing for five years. But the stakes are much higher now that this is my business we’re talking about.
“Asha,” an Irish voice calls out behind me. A familiar Irish voice.
“Callum. What…” I turn, looking at the man in confusion.
“I’m C.K. Callum Kelly.” He clears his throat. “I made the booking.”
“My first booking isn’t real?” It’s the only thing I can think of. And it’s crushing.
“Oh, fecking shite. I didn’t think of that.
But it is real! Completely, 100 percent real.
I’ve paid and if you don’t want to take me around the city, that’s fine.
Consider it an investment you never have to pay back.
I’m going to write a rave review either way, because I know you’re an amazing tour guide, whatever happens this weekend. ”
“But why?” I still can’t get over the fact that I still do not have a client.
Personally, I am happy to see Callum, because I love the grumpy man, and I’ve missed him so much.
Every time I was planning my sample tours, I could hear Callum in my head, judging my choices, or giving me slight praise which I know means deep respect to the emotionally stunted man.
Since I haven’t had any clients, I’ve had a lot of time alone during the day, and all I can think about is how much I want to tell Callum something, half for his opinion on the matter and half because I want to see his reaction to things.
But professionally, I want to strangle the man because I was so excited that my business was working, and now I know it isn’t. Yet. I thought I was going to be an overnight success! And now I know it’s going to take a few more nights than that. Bummer.
“I wanted to show you that I could change. That I have changed a little by knowing you. In a good way. I can see that having fun is a good way to spend a vacation. So I thought going on a fun weekend in the city with you would show you that I can meet you in the middle. I won’t ever be as excited about anything as you are at your least excited, except for about you, but I love seeing the world with you and through your eyes. ”
“Callum, we’re at the Scotch Whisky Experience.
You know a big part of this is a theme park-like ride through the history of the drink in a giant plastic barrel, right?
” This is his nightmare, and my favorite activity.
If you would have asked me where I would never see the man, it would be this and the Edinburgh Dungeon.
Or any of the dungeon locations, to be honest.
He winces. “I know. But I love you, so I can get in a giant plastic barrel.”
“What? You love me?”
“Obviously.”
“There’s nothing obvious about it! How would I know that, Callum? Do you think perkiness gives me the power to read minds?” This man. I don’t know what to do with him.
“You’re more aware of people than I am, I figured you would have picked up on it. Without me having to say the bloody words.”
“Well, I haven’t.”
“Oh. Well. I do. Love you. Of course I do. You bring light to my life and remind me that joy is just as valid as seriousness, and not some immature reaction to life. You make me a lighter person, and I like the me that enjoys the world with you. I can go back to my dull world if I have to, but I don’t want to.
I don’t want to lose the light, even though mere men are not great at holding on to the sunshine.
But I promise that if you give me another chance, I will never make you regret it.
I will do my best to make sure nothing gets in the way of your shining.
I was worried the differences would make us incompatible, but they don’t.
They balance us. And without you, I would never be able to find my balance again. ”
I melt the more I hear it, despite my residual anger at him. I really am not good at holding grudges, especially when the apology comes with that sweet speech. That, and the fact that I’ve been missing him, means my anger never stood a chance.
Plus if this man is willing to go to the Scotch Whiskey Experience, he just might have changed. And I’d rather give this a chance and maybe be hurt than never have Callum again. I am starting a business, after all, and if I have the courage to do that, I have the courage to believe in Callum.
“Well, I love you, too. You giant, grumpy, Rain Cloud. I love how much you love history, and how much you know about it in that brain of yours and how you challenge me to look at it deeper so I can be a better historian. I love the way you take care of me, when I don’t think about myself.
I love the way I need an advanced class to understand you, because it makes me feel special that you allowed me close enough to you to learn.
Close enough to care. Close enough to love.
And I love your forearms, especially when you wear a slutty little button-down. ”
“Thank Christ.” He pulls me into his arms and kisses me. I curl against him in happiness to be back here. His lips expertly caress mine, his tongue playing against mine and eliciting a reaction that only he seems to be able to unlock.
I lose myself in the kiss until some catcalls interrupt the moment. We break away, me on a laugh and him on a growl directed at me for pulling away and at the tourists for ruining the moment.
“But what are we going to do about the future? You should know that I am not financially sound in this moment, and I’m starting a business in a contracting industry,” I say.
He laughs, a sound that only I can elicit from the man. I preen at the accomplishment, so much that I almost miss his response.
“I’m aware. But if anyone can do it, it’s you.
I know you’ll be gone a lot getting this business started, and I understand the schedule better than anyone.
I’ll treasure any spare day I get with you.
And I’ll be here to celebrate your wins, which will start coming very soon.
Because I love you, Wee Sunshine.” Having declared his love once, he seems to enjoy saying it again. That’s okay; I like hearing it.
“Hey, shouldn’t you retire the insulting nickname now?”
He shakes his head. “It might have started out an as insult, but it isn’t anymore. You shine, inside and out. And you light up my dark world.”
I kiss him again before pulling away before we can get too involved again. “Well, I love the rain, Rain Cloud. So I guess we’re even.” The Edinburgh weather, always obliging about rain, gives me some to prove me honest.
Callum pulls me under his arm, shielding me as best he can. “Come on, there’s a weekend of fun planned for me.” He tucks me into his side and pulls me toward the entrance.
“Wait, you’re really going through with it?”
“Oh, yes. I have to prove to my new girlfriend that I can enjoy life.”
“I already believe you. But there’s zero chance I’m missing out on seeing you in a plastic whisky barrel, so let’s go show you the exciting, frivolous, lightly historic, non-boring weekend of my dreams. With selfies!”
“Grand.”
He gives me another light kiss and opens the door, starting our lifetime of adventures together.