15. Theo #2
I took a step forward and pushed the door open further. Her hair was in a messy bun on top of her head, her face was free of any makeup, her nose was red, and she looked pale. I couldn’t even appreciate that she was wearing my T-shirt and nothing else.
“What—” another bout of coughing into her elbow, “are you doing here?” She rasped when she finished.
“You’re sick?” A cold sweat had broken out on my body, and I was forcing myself to focus on her face and stay here with her rather than getting pulled into the past.
“Yeah.” She sniffled. “Stupid James came—”
“James?” Seeing her sick was making my protective instincts go into overdrive and hearing another man’s name on her lips wasn’t exactly helping me calm down.
“The only co-worker I like,” she added with a small smile, even sick she was fucking beautiful.
But her smile wasn’t enough to calm me down today especially with how dim the light in her eyes was.
“He came to work on Monday sick. Guess he passed it on to me.” She finished on a cough again. “I seem to have it worse.”
“Let me in,” I demanded as she kept her hand on the door.
“Theo, I’m disgusting. Aubrey is going to bring me some soup once she’s off shift. I just need to sleep it off.”
“You weren’t answering your phone,” I accused her.
She sneezed and cleared her throat. “Sorry, I was sleeping. Plus, you don’t need to see me like this.”
“Quinn.” She looked surprised at the desperation in my voice. “You are sick,” I emphasized each word. “I need you to let me in.” It felt like someone was grabbing my chest and squeezing it.
The only other woman I’d ever cared about got sick and then she died. Quinn had a cold, not cancer, but try telling my nervous system that.
“Theo, I’m fine. I’m not going to d—” It was like a light turned on.
Her eyes softened and she let out a sigh.
She seemed to read my panic, even without knowing the full story she connected the dots.
I hadn’t said what killed my mum, but I must have given her enough to guess.
“I’m sick and you need to come in.” I nodded, grateful I didn’t need to explain why seeing her like this was forcing me into a place that I did not want to be in, especially picturing it being Quinn. “But what if you catch this?”
I shook my head and pushed past her to get into her apartment. It was the first time I’d been inside as I looked around her space. The TV was on at a low volume, tissues were piled in a garbage bin on the floor. There were dishes and a box of medication on the counter.
“Sorry, it’s a bit messy,” she said through a sniff. I looked back to see her fidgeting. “I haven’t been feeling like cleaning up.”
The second I got her settled and asleep, I was going to clean up for her so she didn’t have to worry about it.
But I didn’t bother telling her that, instead I answered her earlier question.
“I don’t get sick.” I moved into her kitchen, placing my briefcase on a bar stool as I took off my suit jacket and rolled my sleeves up.
“You don’t?” she asked as she stood watching me move around.
“No. One time a stomach bug threatened to take out our whole office. The rest of the guys got it and I was fine. Haven’t been sick in a while.” I put her kettle on and hunted for a mug and some tea.
“What are you doing?” Her question was followed by another coughing fit.
At least it sounded like she was clearing things out of her lungs. I was still tense but talking with her and having a task were both helping. If she didn’t sound better after some tea and a nap, I would be calling a doctor to come see her.
“Making you tea,” I said dryly. “Go get back under the blankets on the couch and text Aubrey that I’ve got you.”
“You’re staying?” she asked, I could see the hope in her eyes even though she tried to smother it with a neutral tone.
“Did you think I was going to come in, get proof of life and leave?” I turned to look at her as I waited for the water to boil.
“Well… I don’t know.” More sniffles.
“I’m staying, Love.” My voice softened a little more than before. The panic had made me short but the tightness in my chest was easing, helping me think more clearly.
“But you have to work,” she objected weakly.
“I’m the boss. I don’t have to do anything. Plus, I have all my stuff with me.”
She let out a sigh and threw her hands up in the air, but I could tell she was weak since it didn’t have much enthusiasm. “Fine, but don’t blame me when you get sick.”
She turned to go back to the couch, coughing as she went.
“Worth it to see you in my shirt, babe,” I said with a smirk.
She looked down and I would bet my empire that she was flushed and not from a fever. I picked up the box of cold medicine only to find the pack empty. I shook my head as I finished making her tea, grabbed my briefcase and went to join her in the living room.
“Thanks,” she said as I passed her the mug. She was sitting cross legged on the couch with a blanket over her lap. A clear sign she wasn’t feeling well was how little she was talking. She rambled, it was charming and I was missing it.
“When did you last take meds?” I placed my briefcase on one of the chairs.
“I don’t remember, but it was before I moved to the couch,” she answered, sounding adorably tired.
“Any idea when that was?”
“Umm… early this morning?” She didn’t sound certain but based on how terrible she sounded, it was probably long enough that she could take more.
“The ones in the kitchen are empty. Do you have more?”
She nodded. “Bathroom counter.” I turned before she had a chance to object.
I grabbed two pills and placed them in her hand. Once I was satisfied that she had medicine and her tea seemed to be helping keep some of the coughing down, I got comfortable in the accent chair.
“You should have called me.” I leveled her with the best glare I could muster. I felt like I could breathe again and I wasn’t on the verge of losing myself in my memories so I didn’t feel like glaring. At least not as much as normal.
“It’s just a cold, Theo.” Her voice was soft and low.
“You’ll tell me next time,” I said firmly. The next time though, I hoped she would be in my space already where I could take care of her.
That was a crazy thought for me to have. Normally a commitment or the idea of someone else living in my space would make my skin crawl. Not this though. Not with Quinn.
“Do you want to talk about it?” She started playing with the corner of her blanket, not looking at me.
I appreciated that she was giving me the option. That she wasn’t forcing me or demanding answers for why I had busted in here, pissed off at her for having a cold and being a little irrational.
“I told you my mum got sick and passed away a year after we moved back to London.” I cleared my throat.
Aside from the five guys and Noah’s parents, I hadn’t talked about this with anyone else.
“Looking back on it now, I can see the signs, see the changes. But I was eleven when she first got sick, not that I had any idea what it all meant.” I looked past Quinn, out the window.
“She found out she had breast cancer and didn’t tell me.
It was stage four by the time she was diagnosed, it had metastasised to her liver.
“Our walks at night became slower, she looked more drained, she’d fall asleep on the couch really early.
She told me she was tired, she was losing weight, but I didn’t think too much of it, I was a kid.
Her doctors were putting her through an intense round of chemo, but she later told me she didn’t want my last memories of her to be as a sick person.
“She knew she was going to die when she moved us back to London. She stopped all treatments and decided she just wanted to enjoy the time she had left with me. And she knew she didn’t want my father to have custody; she was close with Noah’s mum before we moved away so she wanted me near them when she passed.
“The doctors were surprised she had lasted a year. Even without the chemo she was sick. Some days she couldn’t get out of bed. No matter what I did or what I brought her, she never got better.” I closed my eyes against the onslaught of memories.
Just because I was older didn’t make it hurt less, it was painful watching my mum like that, watching her disappear before my eyes.
I opened my eyes to see Quinn looking at me with warmth and compassion, she looked like she was blinking back tears since her eyes were watery.
Her presence calmed and grounded me, the last of my fear ebbed away as she sat there, listening to me. And that brought me some clarity.
I’d made my decision in that moment. I didn’t want to fight it or doubt it anymore.
Quinn was mine.
“I’ll make sure to tell you when I’m sick next time.” I appreciated that she didn’t say anything about it directly. After another round of coughing she snuggled back into the couch, lying down on her side so she could still look at me. “But you don’t have to take care of me. I’ll be fine.”
“I wouldn’t be here if I didn’t want to be, Love.”
She smiled softly as she coughed and her eyes grew heavy. “You don’t have to stay. I’m,” a yawn, “just going to fall asleep.”
“I’ll be here when you wake up,” I replied softly, and she mumbled something unintelligible as she fell asleep.
I sat there for a moment, watching her chest rise and fall, her mouth hanging open because her nose was too stuffed.
I was tempted to take a picture of her but I didn’t think she would appreciate that.
When she was feeling better I would be getting one of her, though.
My current phone background was one of the standard ones you got with the phone, Noah said it made me look like a psychopath.
I smirked and shook my head, I’d never fallen first, ever. Never even really fallen at all. But for Quinn, it was worth it.
Standing up, I cleared the table of the tissues before heading into the kitchen to put the dishes away and tidy up as best I could for her.