40. Chapter 40
Chapter forty
Shelby
We set out the next day with enough supplies to last us a week if we’re careful. With plans to recover what we took from the feed store a few days ago, Bob and Norma stand on the porch to say goodbye.
Since I’ve kept mostly to myself, I’m surprised to see Nora hug one of the men standing off to the side. His cheeks burn under her affectionate gesture, but he smiles as she walks away.
Larry shakes a few hands as Cason confers with Bob. As soon as he turns my way, I move toward the truck.
Cason elects to drive as usual and I give up a spot in the front for Zoey and Amanda who eagerly join him on the soft cushy bench seats. Bean, who’s taken to following Zoey wherever she goes, sits up there too and when I settle in the back with Bo against my side, Nate drops beside me.
Lance takes up a spot toward the end of the bed while Larry tries to make himself comfortable next to him.
Per Cason, we have another thirty miles to go which feels both insurmountable but also freeing. The only regret I have is that we stopped here in the first place but with Cason by my side, the future looks less tenuous than it did a few days ago.
Hopefully we can avoid another horde but if we don’t, we will simply have to find a way around it because this is a part of our lives that no one can avoid.
Still recovering from my wounds, I doze for a while, half laying on the dog who doesn’t budge. When we hit a particularly brutal bump, I rise to take in our surroundings, just as we pass the sign indicating we’ve reached Lebanon.
“Lebanon,” Lance murmurs, a small smile curling his lip. “This is where Michael Royer was born.”
“Who?” Nate asks, echoing my thoughts and Lance shrugs.
“Royer. He’s a comic book artist and inker.”
I don’t know shit about comic books, but I like the way Lance’s eyes light up when he describes this Michael guy’s artistic accomplishments.
Whoever he is and whatever he did, left a lasting impression on my young friend.
I hope stories like this carry through this end of the world stuff because people like that deserve to be remembered.
Unfortunately, the fluffy clouds I fell asleep to are long gone and I shiver when the first drop of rain patters my face. Thankful for Bo’s warmth against my side, I run my fingers through his coarse hair, humming when he wags his tail in appreciation.
“It’s gonna storm,” Larry says with a yawn, and I nod my agreement before turning toward the cab.
Cason looks up just as the skies open and thunder cracks overhead before the deluge of rain instantly soaks those of us unfortunate enough to be out in the elements.
His eyes warm before he glances around the area for a place to safely stop. Even though the ride so far has been uneventful, entering a new town, despite its smaller size and population equates to increased risk and Cason takes that shit seriously.
After the other night when I laid in his arms and felt, for the first time in years, truly safe, nothing felt insurmountable. However, there’s still a kernel of unease that I can’t deny whispering that this is too good to be true.
I don’t expect Cason to suddenly become a monster, but I do worry he might come to his senses. Not only that but we’ve never spoken about Ben, and I don’t know what I would say if he ever asked what happened.
We live in a different world now, but would a former cop look the other way if he knew that I killed my husband? Would it change how he looks at me?
I’m chilled to the bone by the time Cason stops before a mini mart on the corner. The parking lot boasts three gas pumps but with no power, can we still access the gas?
A lone man or what was a man fumbles around inside. It’s hard to tell for how long but many of the displays now grace the floor and the man’s grey tinged features appear to be flaking off.
As soon as Cason stops beneath the canopy covering the pumps, I jump over the side. Shivering convulsively, I shake out like a dog, spraying droplets everywhere.
However, the rain still pours from the sky, and I remain both drenched and freezing until Cason throws open his door. His mouth quirks as he wraps me up in his arms and I snuggle deep, soaking in his warmth.
I can’t contain my giggle though when he shivers convulsively and his answering chuckle warms my soul as I look up and meet his twinkling gaze.
The world around us fades away as he cups my cheeks before gently brushing his mouth against mine. My lips tingles at the contact but before I can deepen the kiss, he pulls away and says, “C’mon, sweetheart. Let’s get you out of the rain.”
The last place I want to go is inside that store with one of them, but this is our new reality. I have to accept that there will always be risk. Besides, Cason takes it out easily enough and after he’s dragged the dead body beyond the door, I step inside.
Unfortunately, the cloying smell of death lingers and immediately saliva pools on my tongue. Rotting flesh, no matter the animal has got to be the worst smell I have ever experienced.
It’s drier inside but I’d almost rather be wet when Nora gags beside me and I turn away. If she does it again, I’m definitely puking.
Attempting to ignore it, I move down the aisles but despite the snacks on offer I can’t focus on anything else. The others must agree because when I emerge back at the door, they're already there.
Zoey blinks her pretty blue eyes and I brush my hand through her wet hair.
It’s still pouring outside and judging by the angry clouds in the sky, it won’t be letting up soon. If we could all fit in the cab, it wouldn’t matter but no one wants to sit through this if they don’t have to.
This is why, when the heat of Cason’s chest warms my back, I point across the street and ask, “What about there?”
The line of old storefronts appears abandoned apart from one establishment at the end, a bookstore. Maybe they sold comic books? If so, it’s worth clearing the place out, to bring Lance a little bit of home.
“You want to go there?” Cason asks, his brows furrowed.
My fingers itch to touch his silky hair but whatever this is between us is too new. I don’t want to risk rejection either.
We may have crossed a line the other night, but the fact remains he has his demons, and I have mine. Shit like that doesn’t go away in an instant.
At my nod, the group waits for his direction while his head swivels across the storefronts and beyond to assess for danger. When his eyes return to mine, his brows still furrowed, I say, “We can wait it out there, yeah? Maybe it’s less stinky.”
“Stinky?” he says, his mouth curving and my heart skips a bit. I like this Cason, the one who smiles. I hope he’s here to stay. I hope his newfound lightheartedness is partially because of me.
“Hm,” he says, and I touch his arm.
“Please? Just for a few minutes?”
After searching my gaze, he finally nods and says, “Okay.”
Relieved, I follow him through the door and out to the curb with the group following. The streets are clear but for the rain pounding the pavement and by the time we cross and pause before the double glass doors, we’re doubly soaked.
With Zoey trembling beside me I feel a pang of regret but it’s too late to change my mind as Larry taps on the door and Cason raises the sledgehammer in his hands. To my relief, nothing emerges but we still huddle just inside the door while Larry, Nate and Cason check it out.
From here, I can see the cash register and a cordoned off checkout line. Tables of discounted books line the area opposite.
Further into the darkness are the shelves of books. The store is bigger than I expected, and I wait with a kernel of worry until Cason emerges with a small smile, Larry and Nate on his heels.
By silent agreement, we spread out and I run my fingers over the spines of the older books in the first section while inhaling the musty odor.
When I was younger, I had a voracious appetite to read anything I could get my hands on. That faded over time, but I still admire the cozy nook where Zoey has cuddled up with Amanda and the dogs.
Lance and Nate disappeared to the back while Larry and Nora speak in low tones by the door.
It’s too dark to read the titles as I move through the aisles before pausing when total blackness greets me up ahead. Of course, Cason’s right behind me and I look up when he shines his flashlight above us.
My heart thumps at his proximity and I lead him further into the depths. We end up in the romance aisle and although it wasn’t my purpose, I still feel the heat on my cheeks when Cason picks up a novel with a half-naked dude on the cover and raises his brows.
When his lips curl into a sexy smirk, I cover my cheeks until he steps closer. His eyes hold an intensity that sends a shiver down my spine as he wraps his fingers in my hair and pulls me closer.
My breath catches and I hide my trembling hands by pressing them against his chest. Anticipation rolls through me in waves as he presses his mouth to mine. Eager to see this through, I open easily when he gently nudges his tongue past my lips.
It’s delicate, tentative, wonderful but I want more. I need more. I want him to desire me, not the frail doll he sees when he looks at me.
“Shelby,” he groans before pulling back but I’m not ready and I grab his head, curling my fingers in his hair. This time it’s not tender, nope, I show him with every swipe of my tongue how much I want this.
His fingers dig into my hips, and I love it. I love his need for me. Only when I'm breathless, do I pull back, panting against those yummy lips.
He’s definitely a good kisser I confirm as his mouth tilts into a sweet smile. My heart thumps at that and I return the gesture when he says, “You’re beautiful, Shelby.”
“Cason,” I whisper through the lump in my throat. When he says it like that, staring into my eyes, I actually believe it and it’s been so long . . .
No surprise, Cason seems to understand my expression because he pulls me close before rocking us slowly in the darkness.
Any moment where we’re not fighting for our lives is precious, but this means so much more to me and I struggle to find the right words before they ultimately die on my lips because something crashes nearby and a faint curse follows.
It could be nothing but it’s safer to be vigilant which is why Cason pulls away while I push aside the disappointment rolling through me.
“Everything okay?” he calls out, turning to the front of the building while I wrap my arms around my middle.
Why do I feel like I just missed out on something that would have been really freaking special?
“Yeah, sorry man,” Larry says, his muffled voice carrying back to us.
“No problem,” Cason responds but I shake my head. It is a fucking problem because I wanted this time with Cason and now it’s gone.
When a shiver of foreboding crawls up my spine, I step past Cason, avoiding his gaze. My paranoia eases a little when he grabs my hand, twining our fingers together but I can’t quite shake this eerie feeling and I fucking hate it.
Once we’re back at the front, Cason stops before the window and eyes the rain now a slow drizzle before saying, “While we’re here, we should check out the liquor store.”
I follow his gaze to the squat building beside the minimart, proclaiming Pete’s Liquor before wrinkling my nose. Sensing the questions bubbling on my tongue, Cason says, “Liquor can be traded.”
It’s weird to consider that we need to be prepared to trade for goods but I’m glad someone thought of it because I sure as hell wouldn’t have.
“You stay here with the girls,” Cason declares, and I open my mouth to protest before glancing over my shoulder. I don’t want to go anywhere without Cason, but I also can’t leave them here and vulnerable.
“I’ll stay too,” Nora says.
With a nod, Cason turns to me and grabs my cheeks before placing a gentle kiss on my lips.
“Next time,” he whispers, “I want to feel you, all of you.”
He’s out the door before I can respond with Larry on his heels. Rolling my eyes to the ceiling, I step to the side and watch them maneuver down the street before crossing to the other side.
Now that I’m all hot and bothered, he leaves me to raid a freaking liquor store.
Jerk.