Chapter Thirty-Seven
Marcus
I stuff my laptop charger in my bag for our weekend at the cabin and zip it up as Gigi walks into the kitchen. This woman has a piece of rolling luggage, a tote bag, and a backpack for just a weekend trip.
“We’re only going away for two and a half days, G.”
She rolls her eyes. “I need all this, okay? I have regular clothes, outdoor clothes, all the stuff for my hair. At least I packed my Kindle and not physical books!”
I shake my head as I take her bags from her. “Grab my laptop bag. I’ll take these to the truck.”
“Thanks, prince. I’ll be out in a minute. I’m just going to say goodbye to Ethel.”
I get the bags in the truck, and Gigi still isn’t out of the house. I walk back inside to see her on the couch with the cat.
“G, we need to get on the road.”
“I know. She’s just being really snuggly right now. She knows I’m going away.”
“She’s a cat, she’ll be fine. Melonie has a code to come check on her.”
“She’s not just a cat, prince. She’s part of our family.”
“Part of the family that scratches people,” I mumble under my breath.
She must not have heard me, because she extends the cat to me. “Say goodbye to Marcus, Ethel.”
The cat’s eyes are wide, and I see its claws on its outstretched paws. I reach out and apprehensively pat its head. “Bye, Ethel. Don’t destroy the furniture. Good enough?”
She rolls her eyes. “I guess that will do.” She kisses the animal and places it on the couch. “Alright, let’s hit the road.”
We made good time getting to my family’s property in Lee, about two hours from Boston. It’s really not a simple house at all, more like a 3,400 square foot restored 19th century home. It’s set back in a clearing, surrounded by large, old trees, with a four-car garage and a large flower garden to the side of the house. Relief washes over me when I see my brother’s BMW parked beside my mother’s Mercedes.
We pull into the driveway and Gigi’s eyes go wide as she looks out the window. “Prince, this isn’t a house, this is a mansion.”
“A mansion would be bigger than this, princess.”
I put the truck in park and hop out. I go to Gigi’s door to open it and help her down. My mom comes out the front door, waving at us.
“Marcus! Gigi! You made it!”
“Hey, Mom.”
“Hi, Mrs. Holt.” Gigi extends her hand to my mom for a handshake, but is instead greeted with a hug.
“Marcus, your brother’s inside. He just got here a little while ago.”
“I’d love to meet him.” Gigi takes my hand.
My mom opens the door, and I follow the women inside the house. Gigi looks around, taking in the spacious first floor.
“This is beautiful.”
My mom smiles. “Thank you. We get out here a few times a year. It’s nice to have a place to get away to.”
We walk to the kitchen where my brother is sitting at the island, eating a sandwich. He looks up and his trademark grin forms on his face. I realize I’ve missed him in the year since I’ve last seen him.
“Hey, bro.” He walks over to hug me. We’re about the same height, but he’s smaller than I am. We both have the same tan skin and dark hair, but somehow he ended up with green eyes. Where I take after my mom’s Hispanic influence, he’s more the image of my dad’s Irish ancestry.
I return the hug, then release him to place my hand on Gigi’s back. “Dominic, this is Gigi. Gigi, this is Dominic, my little brother.”
His eyes move to Gigi, and he gives her a big smile. “Great to meet you, Gigi.”
“Great to finally meet you, too! I wasn’t able to see you when you visited Marcus last year, so it’s nice to put a face to a name.”
When Dominic stopped in Boston for two days last year, Lewis had Gigi stressed to hell with one of his family’s charity functions for the weekend. Lewis’ family loved to make sure the world knew how much money they gave away. Meanwhile, my family quietly donates to causes my grandfather cared about. We regularly donate to food banks and women’s shelters. He said he wanted to help those who needed it most, because when his grandparents emigrated from Ireland, they struggled.
Dominic looks at me. “Tell me my brother is treating you well. Not too grumpy, I hope.”
“I’m not grumpy.”
The entire group answers in unison, “Yes, you are.”
“I hate you all.”
Gigi curls into my side, hand on my chest. “No you don’t, prince. Don’t lie.”
“Prince?” my brother says, looking like he’s going to laugh.
Damn Gigi and her nickname.
“I call him prince because he reminds me of a Disney prince. The hair, the protective side. Just fit.”
My mom’s face looks like it’s going to break with the large smile plastered across it. “She has a nickname for him.”
Dominic slaps my shoulder. “Well, prince , it will be great to spend a couple days with you and to get to know Gigi better.”
Gigi leaves my side, walking to the island to inspect Dominic’s plate. “Are there sandwiches?”
My mom goes to the fridge to start pulling out bread and everything needed. “I’ll put out everything. You kids make as much as you like.”
“Prince, are you hungry? I can make you one.”
“I could eat.”
I sit on one of the chairs and watch her move through the kitchen. She has on a sundress today that, while it’s cute on her, isn’t her. I know she bought clothes for this weekend, and I hate that. I want her to be herself. I miss her weird shirts and her boots.
She sits, placing a sandwich in front of me. “Mayonnaise, not mustard, don’t worry.”
She knows how I take my sandwiches. Why does something as simple as a condiment make me feel cared for? I lean over and kiss her cheek, because that’s what I think a boyfriend would do. She smiles so sweetly, it’s almost believable that we’ve done this a hundred times before.
“Thank you, princess.”
My brother looks between us, and my mother smiles as she begins to eat. We might just pull this off.
My father walks into the living room around seven, finally driving in from the city. We’re all playing gin around the coffee table, laughing, sharing stories. My brother has made it his mission to tell Gigi all the embarrassing things I did from ages five to ten.
Gigi notices my father first. “Hey, Mr. Holt!”
He loosens his tie. “Gigi. Good to see you boys made it.”
“Did you work today?” my brother asks. He only comes into town a couple times a year, yet my father decided to go into the office. We didn’t have anything important going on today, I know that for a fact, so there was no good reason for him not to be here when my brother arrived.
“Had some loose ends to tie up.”
“There’s a plate for you from dinner in the oven. Should still be warm if you’re hungry.”
“Thank you, Claire. If you’ll excuse me, I’m going to change out of this suit.”
He walks out of the room, up the stairs to my parent’s room. My brother sighs, going back to our card game.
“He isn’t a man of many words, is he?” Gigi observes.
My mom lays a card down. “He probably just needs to decompress from the workday and the drive.”
Gigi nods and knocks. We all groan that we lost while she beams as she lays down her cards.
My father eventually came back downstairs to join us. He didn’t talk much, tablet in his lap. We finished playing cards and were ready to go to bed shortly after. Gigi heads to our room and I go to the kitchen to get water for us. I grab two bottles from the fridge as my brother comes into the room.
“Gigi’s nice. I like her for you.”
I take a drink. “She’s a sweet girl.”
“You’re more affectionate with her than I’ve seen you with other women.”
I shrug. “I haven’t liked a woman like her before. It’s easy with her.” Somehow, the words actually feel true. It is easy with her.
“It isn’t real, is it?”
My eyes dart to his. “How the fuck do you know that?”
“Too fast, perfect timing for dad’s request. Close friend turned girlfriend? Easy for me to figure that one out.”
I run a hand down my face. “Is it obvious? Do you think Dad will realize what we’re doing?”
“Nah, you two are pretty convincing. Plus, I don’t think Dad cares who it is, as long as you get married.”
I pause for a moment. “We might be believable because it might not be entirely fake for me.”
He grins. “I was hoping you would say that. Even with all the signs saying it isn’t real, I do see you have feelings for her. I’m happy for you. I know you have trouble letting people in.”
I nod, leaning on the counter. “It’s not going to go any further than our deal, though. I won’t let it. She deserves a man who isn’t so damaged.”
“What are you talking about, Marcus?”
“The shit we went through as kids. It sticks with you. I’m not even sure I want kids; she should be with a man she can have a family with. A man that can easily be open and happy.”
“Marcus, listen to me. You have to let the shit with Dad go. You need to talk with someone. I did, and I’m able to function normally in relationships now. You deserve love. You deserve to be with someone who makes you happy. That could be Gigi.”
My brother’s words sit uneasily in the pit of my stomach. He and I understand each other so well because we lived through the same shit. Only now, he’s coming out the other side of it, while I’m still stuck in the past.
“I’m proud of you for being able to move on from all of it. But it’s harder for me. I know Gigi deserves better than what I could offer her.”
He grabs my shoulder. “Don’t let the good stuff in life pass you by because you aren’t willing to put in the work to resolve the bad.”
I nod, and he walks out of the room. Maybe he’s right, but I’m just not sure the damaged parts of me can be healed at this point. I’m almost thirty and I haven’t let go of the resentment or the hurt. It wouldn’t be fair to Gigi to have to be by my side while I figure my shit out. I’ve already asked too much of her.