Chapter 4 #2
Reid would be staying on the island too?
Well, so what? Calista would only be here long enough to bring closure to her mother’s life, and then she was vapor.
When she got Eloisa alone, she would make it 100 percent clear she would not be involved in any events beyond a small memorial service for Demetra over the weekend.
If Athena wanted to stay, that was her business. However, Calista had no idea how that was workable with Athena’s LPGA commitments. Time to assert herself. If she’d learned one thing in therapy, it was that boundaries were important.
Orion pulled up and called out, “All aboard.”
Reid strolled over to the golf cart, along with Athena, while Calista stayed rooted.
“You coming, sis?” Athena asked.
She did not want to ride with Reid, and she needed to set things straight with Eloisa. “You go on ahead. I think I’ll walk. I need to clear my head.”
“It’s three miles to Crafters’ Corner,” Orion said.
“I run five miles a day.” Calista forced a perky smile.
“Oh, well then.” Orion waved and put the golf cart in gear. Artemis followed her in the smaller golf cart, pulling the trailer filled with luggage.
Leaving Calista alone with Eloisa. She turned to face the quirky island owner.
“Something is troubling you,” Eloisa said.
She knotted her hands into fists, the breeze blowing her skirt against her bare legs. “Yes.”
“You’re allowed to speak without censure, Calista. Say whatever you like.”
Eloisa’s phrasing startled her. Whenever Benjamin Dempsey told her to express her mind growing up, and she’d done so, a vicious verbal berating always followed, and she’d learned to keep her mouth shut.
Hesitating, she fingered her bottom lip. Eloisa was not her father, but the ingrained fear lingered. Would she ever shed the wounds of abuse?
“Go on,” Eloisa said, an encouraging tone curling into her comforting voice. “On Hobby Island, everyone may express their needs without judgment or pressure to conform.”
Calista narrowed her eyes. Eloisa appeared genuine, and she had fond memories of the woman, but still, she didn’t really know her.
Your mother trusted her.
The kindness in Eloisa’s eyes deepened. “It’s also okay if you’re not ready to talk.”
Calista studied the woman plumed in scarlet. “Mom’s favorite color was red.”
“I know.” Eloisa stood arrow straight, her smile never wavering. “That’s why I dressed in the color to greet you.”
Wow. The island owner was that calculating? Her kooky demeanor cloaked a sharp mind.
Exhaling, Calista dropped her shoulders. “I don’t know what you’re expecting of me.”
“Why, sweetheart, I expect you to be yourself.”
Be herself? Even at twenty-nine, she was unsure of who she was. For twenty-four years, Benjamin Dempsey had drilled into her what she was—worthless, stupid, ugly, incompetent.
In the five years since she’d walked away from her family and golf career, she’d made sense of the world outside her controlling father and cobbled together a life of her own.
Not an easy undertaking. Calista required a therapist’s help, and she worked on improving herself every single day, but in times of stress, she still withdrew and blocked out the world.
Right now, she ached to jump into Reid’s skiff, motor back to Everly, and catch the first plane home to Denver.
Instead, she summoned her courage. “Having these events sprung on us, especially the golf tournament, seems manipulative to me.”
Eloisa nodded. “I feel the same way.”
Caught off guard, Calista blinked. “Then why are you doing it?”
Eloisa’s smile faded, and her eyes clouded, as if seeing into the past. “It was your mother’s wish.”
That pulled Calista’s head up higher. “Why didn’t you tell me that when you called to say she’d passed?”
Eloisa winced. “Demetra asked me not to reveal her plans until you got here.”
“Why would she do that?”
The slightest tremble shook Eloisa’s bottom lip. “She was afraid you wouldn’t come if you knew about the tournament.”
Calista squeezed her hands into fists. “I’ve come to the island to say goodbye, but I’m not playing in the tournament. I no longer golf. Ever.”
“Understood.” There was no judgment on Eloisa’s face.
“I’m glad you accept it.”
“But of course.” Eloisa hesitated. “Do you mind if I ask how long you intend to stay? Just for housekeeping reasons, nothing else.”
“I booked a flight home for Monday.”
“That will work. We’ve scheduled the official ceremony for Sunday morning in our little island chapel.”
“Athena and I don’t get a say in the events?”
“I prepared things based on your mother’s wishes. Would you like to see the letter she dictated to me?”
Did she? Calista considered the question and then shook her head. It was so engulfing. She was grateful to have her mother’s wishes spelled out; after all, she’d had zero contact from Demetra in twenty years, well, except for . . .
No, she wasn’t ready for this. “Not right now.”
“Just let me know. I have a trunk full of Demetra’s correspondence and journals—”
“When you phoned, you said she’d already prepaid for cremation. Has that been carried out?” Calista asked as matter-of-factly as possible.
“Yes.” Eloisa bobbed her head. “The funeral home cremated her body in Everly, and her ashes are now in a beautiful urn in the Hobby Island chapel with visitation hours for the people who knew Demetra. We loved her very much, my dear.”
That image was a visceral punch to the gut. Calista sucked in a deep breath, gulping in sea air and regret. “I wish I could have been there with her in her last hours . . .”
“She didn’t want you to see her like that. She carried so much guilt and remorse, and it happened so quickly. She came to the island to ask for my help in preparing for the end, and within three short days, she was gone.”
Too much to absorb. Again, the urge to flee sank talons into Calista’s heart. Go. Leave. Your mother never tried to contact you. Never tried to get you back. She let BD take you away from her.
A hollow sensation carved into her body, whittling her to nothing. She was numb again, empty, the feeling that haunted her life.
“Calista.” Eloisa laid a soft hand on her shoulder. “Where did you go?”
“Back in time,” Calista mumbled.
The stark white lily in Eloisa’s festive flapper hat bobbed when she nodded her head. “Your mother loved you so much. She was an imperfect person, as are we all, but her love for you girls never wavered.”
Calista couldn’t stop the scoffing snort that shot from her, and Eloisa looked sad, but she didn’t try to make things better, which Calista appreciated. There was no making this better.
“I’ll call Orion back with the golf cart,” Eloisa said, taking a walkie-talkie from the deep pocket of her skirt.
“No,” Calista said, the word coming out harsher than she intended. She lowered her voice. “I don’t want to be around people right now.”
“Are you sure that’s not just a defense mechanism?”
“Oh, it totally is.” Hell, she was self-aware. She didn’t need this flamboyant senior citizen telling her about her messed-up emotional responses. “Please, just let me be.”
Eloisa looked as if she wanted to give Calista a massive hug, but if the woman tried to embrace her, she’d come unraveled.
She raised her arms and backed away. “Please.”
“As you wish. Have a peaceful walk. Take the path east for three miles, it’s a straight shot.” Then Eloisa mounted her unicycle, took out her knitting, and pedaled away, needles clicking.