Chapter 28
Chapter twenty-eight
MAGNOLIA
As I laid in the cool ceramic tub, trying to talk myself down from a panic attack, I heard a soft knock on the bathroom door.
“Go away!” I yelled, figuring it was Lee.
It had been months since he moved home, and it would be so poetic that he would find me back in the tub, crying yet again about marrying his brother.
Only this time, I was going through with it.
“Magnolia, it’s Janelle. Why don’t you go on and open up? Let’s have a bit of girl talk before your big party.”
I rolled my eyes, climbed out of the tub, and clicked open the bathroom door.
Backing up, I lifted my long, emerald-green dress and perched myself on the bathroom counter.
Janelle locked the door behind her, crossed the long, tiled-floor bathroom, and promptly dropped her panties, sitting on the toilet to pee.
“Oh, alright then,” I said, turning my head the other way. “We’re like that now, huh?”
“Girl, we’re never going to be like that, but I had four Tito’s before coming here because, in the interest of girl talk, I am nervous as hell about tonight.” She wiped, flushed, and waltzed over to the sink to wash her hands.
“You’re nervous? At my engagement party? Man, you are self-involved, huh?”
She let out a cackle and studied my face, crossing her arms. “Of course I’m nervous.
My man is in love with you. I’m scared to death that he’s going to drop some huge bomb tonight while everyone’s toasting your engagement.
He’s not the type to wait for the nuptials and the ‘speak now or forever hold your peace’ shit. Especially when it concerns you.”
I shook my head. “My God, Janelle. Let it go. I’m with Dane, and we’re getting married. And you’re on my goddamned payroll. Watch your mouth.”
She tilted her head and played with the hem of her skirt.
“He’s in love with you, Magnolia. He has been his entire life.
I’ve listened to the albums, heard the stories.
I lay in his bed sometimes and stare at the picture of the two of you from a summer a million years ago when you were just friends, and he loved you then, too. ”
Janelle paused to collect her thoughts, perhaps holding back tears.
“I’m not stupid. Lee and I are together because of circumstance, not fate. But you and him, that’s written in the stars. We all know it. Maybe not your fiancé, but the rest of us see it. Please, Magnolia, I have feelings for Lee. Don’t be selfish and mess this up for all of us.”
“Every single move I’ve made has been to keep things from getting screwed up again, Janelle.”
She met my eyes, and for the first time, I saw how much pain she was in. But we were both in pain. All of us were, in one way or another.
“Lee is my friend. He always will be. But that’s it.
That’s all there is to it.” I bounced off the counter and flung open the bathroom door, stomping down the staircase of a house I hoped to own one day, toward a party I hoped to own today.
I found my brother fussing over Sutton’s wrapped hand in the breakfast nook, Lee sweating as he bounced around the kitchen, scrambling to put together plates of hors d’oeuvres.
“What the hell happened?” I demanded, rushing over to Sutton.
“Easy, bridezilla. It was an accident,” Sutton snarled.
I flinched. “I’m worried about you. God, can you please stop being like this?
Can’t anyone just be freaking happy for me?
” I grabbed a half-empty bottle of white wine conveniently sitting on the counter, sipped straight out of the bottle, and shot them all a dirty look before marching toward the veranda to my hiding spot behind the azalea bush.
I sat there, stewing, gripping the bottle of wine like it could somehow cool down the heat rising in me.
We all knew this was bullshit, but I had to go through with it.
Too late to back out now, right? I glanced up at the big, whirling ceiling fan on the veranda, remembering how, as a kid, I’d come out here wishing for everything I had now.
And, for whatever reason, it still wasn’t enough.
I wanted to marry Dane and get it over with.
The second I was Magnolia Wilder, everything would be different.
Maybe, once I signed the paperwork and Dane and I got married, I could wiggle my way into a bigger share of the Trust and buy them all out, securing the fate of the bar on my own.
And just like Eunice, I would live happily ever after on Jones Street in my big, southern townhome.
When he wanted to be, Dane could be a good man.
He worked hard. He was easy on the eyes.
Since we’d been engaged and planning the wedding, he’d been less aggressive, like he won some sort of contest. He was calmer, more collected.
Aside from the upcoming trial, which always had him on edge, he had a sweet demeanor about him, even with his brother lurking on the sidelines, watching our every move.
That would be good enough for the rest of my life, right?
Dane found me on the terrace, sipping straight out of a bottle and staring up at the ceiling. “Hey, baby, what are you doing out here?” He leaned in and kissed me on the top of my head, and I rubbed his back as he sat next to me.
“Just a case of the nerves, is all. I’ll be in shortly. How are you feeling?”
“I’m feeling good. Believe it or not, I’m a little nervous, too.”
A quick laugh escaped me. “The unshakable Dane Wilder is afraid of a party? Color me shocked, y’all.”
“It’s not the party, Magnolia. It’s you. It’s us. It’s Lee hovering around. You know, this isn’t exactly the situation I was hoping for when we said our nuptials.”
I studied his face. He looked tired and not quite himself. Something was eating him up inside. “You sure that’s it, Dane?”
“I’m sure, darlin’. Let’s go on in and socialize a bit before Momma comes looking for us.”
We walked into the party, arm in arm. Before we hit the floor-to-ceiling French doors, Dane took the wine bottle out of my hands and took a long gulp.
After we made our rounds, listened to a handful of toasts to our health and happiness, and everyone in Savannah surveyed my ring like it was the rock of Gibraltar, I took a break from socializing to check on Sutton.
She worked quietly, cleaning up the carnage that was the Wilder kitchen after working her ass off. She looked exhausted. It occurred to me that we were all tired, emotionally drained, and not like ourselves.
“Wanna sleep over tonight, like old times? You can bring some left over key lime pie, and I’ll raid the bar for booze. We can have some good old fashioned girl talk. Does that sound good?”
Sutton didn’t look up from the pans she was scrubbing. “No thanks, Magnolia. I just want to go home and go to bed.”
I tried to hide my disappointment. “Well, maybe soon. I’m tired, too. Will I see you tomorrow at the menu planning meeting for the Historical Holiday Tour?”
Sutton slammed down the pot she was scrubbing into the hot, soapy water, then winced from her earlier wound. “God damn it, Magnolia. You’re not my fucking boss. But, yes, princess, of course I’ll be there to save your life and be there at your beck and call, just like I always am.”
My head snapped back, and I fought down the tears and rage trying to bubble up inside of me. “I’m sorry, Sutton. If you don’t want to do it, then don’t do it.”
“Maybe you should take your own advice.” She grabbed her bags off the counter, leaving her mess behind.
She stopped in the doorway before pushing open the swinging door to the back entrance of the kitchen, keeping her back to me. “We’re all just a little exhausted from having to take care of you all the time. When are you going to step up and be the friend that we all are to you?”
Later that night, after the party had cleared out and I had performed the part of the dutiful future wife, I staggered into the bar and let Kasey go from her shift.
I turned on the radio, cranked up the volume, and got to work putting away the few bottles used that night while cleaning up the rest of the bar.
It wasn’t a huge task, since taking a look at the register and the credit card slips it was yet another quiet night at the bar.
I thought about shooting Sutton a message and apologizing, but I wasn’t sure exactly what I would be apologizing for in the first place. She was clearly upset about something, and if she didn’t want to talk to me about it, I couldn’t force her.
I felt like the second Dane slipped the ring on my finger, my friendships started slipping away.
Charlie didn’t stop by as much as he usually did.
Jordan and Doyle were distant unless it concerned either one of our businesses or the trolley tour.
Sutton was clearly growing more distant by the minute.
And Lee and I only saw each other in passing, which was, of course, mostly of my doing. I thought if I kept him at arm’s length, I could start to move on.
All of it was part of moving forward and becoming someone in a serious relationship—not to mention a business owner—but I hated feeling like I was joining one family but losing the one that had become my whole world.
I’d already lost so much in the last twenty-eight years. I couldn’t handle losing anyone else.
I lifted up my phone to text Sutton when the door to the bar flung open. “We’re closed,” I called out. I heard feet running through the bar, and I looked up, my heart racing. If I’d forgotten to lock the door, and if there was a break-in, they’d take what little I had.
“I’m so sorry, Magnolia,” Sutton cried, running behind the bar and wrapping me up in a long, tear-soaked hug.
The two of us stood there, crying all over each other and holding on until my arms started to fall asleep.
When I finally pulled away and wiped the tears from her round, red face, I asked the question I’d been wanting to ask her for weeks. “What’s really going on, Sutton? And please don’t lie to me.”