Chapter 35
CHAPTER
Angelina and Nate, his head tilted as if to catch her every word, walk up the path towards me. A week has passed since he arrived. He isn’t holding Angelina’s hand, but their arms bump with their steps.
‘What’re you doing out here all alone?’ Nate asks. ‘Wanna come inside and sit with us?’
‘I need the fresh air.’
‘What’s in your pocket?’ Angelina asks suspiciously.
I hold up the satellite phone. ‘Sprung.’
‘Your mother?’ Angelina pulls off her gloves. ‘Take these.’
‘This too.’ Nate shrugs out of his jacket.
‘Thanks, but …’ A wobbly smile is the best I can manage. ‘I’m okay.’
‘Is this the first time you’ve talked to her since you got those emails from the neighbour?’ Angelina asks.
‘I left a voicemail telling her I’d call tonight to discuss everything.’
Angelina squeezes my arm. ‘Come get me if you need support.’
I count to three before dialling. ‘Mum, it’s Flick.’
‘Hello, darling. It’s so lovely to hear your voice. There’s a lot of background noise. Where are you?’
‘That’s the wind. I’m outside the mess.’
‘How are things going? Not long now. You’ll be home in six weeks.’
‘No more spending, Mum. I meant what I said in my message.’
‘Thank you so much for what you’ve done. You have no idea what a relief it is that I can safely answer my phone again.’
‘I can’t keep borrowing. I can’t keep paying your debts.’
‘I don’t know how they add up but—’
‘We could set up a joint account for your pension. That way, I could transfer money for essentials like electricity and your phone. You could spend whatever’s left over at the end of the month.’
‘I beg your pardon? I’m capable of managing my own money, thank you very much!’
When the wind whips my hair into my face, I shove it under my collar. ‘If you were, you wouldn’t need me to bail you out.’
A long silence. ‘I’ll be more careful, darling, I promise.’
‘You always say that.’
‘It’s impossible to live off a pension. Everybody says so.’
‘I pay your rent and other expenses, which should make it easier.’
‘I won’t let you take my pension.’
If you don’t do what I ask, you’re on your own. I wish I could say the words out loud. I wish I could follow through with them.
‘Think about what I’ve said, Mum. Things have to change.’
‘Christmas, Flick, what shall I do this year?’ She blows her nose. ‘Did you get my message about Townsville?’
‘Townsville is out of the question. You’ve already had a holiday this year.’
‘The New Zealand cruise wasn’t a holiday. Yogi Bishnu was inspirational, but I’ve never worked so hard emotionally. If I had a holiday over Christmas, it would take my mind off missing you.’
‘Staying with Katrina, Rob, Matilda and the boys would be a holiday. Katrina is working extra shifts in the lead-up to Christmas and on New Year’s Day. She’d appreciate your help.’
‘I’m not related to Katrina’s boys and I can’t stand Rob.’
‘Spend time with Tilly.’
‘And watch her read? Don’t be ridiculous.’
‘She’ll be happy to talk to you about her books.’
‘I’m like you, Flick. I don’t have time for books.’
I tighten my grip on the phone. ‘I liked reading to Tilly when she was younger. I like talking to her about the books she’s reading now.’
‘Matilda doesn’t like the presents I send on her birthday. I can tell.’
‘She writes thank-you letters.’
‘I went to a lot of trouble this year. That manicure set was expensive, as was the nail polish. I’m sure she hasn’t used them.’
‘When she’s older, she’ll be more interested in things like that.’
‘Matilda has no interest in me.’
‘She never sees you.’
‘The child has none of her father’s joie de vivre. Why won’t you admit that she’s unusual? At her age, I was fascinated by makeup and boys. They haven’t even crossed her mind.’
‘They didn’t interest me either. There’s nothing wrong with that.’
‘Why do you always defend her?’
‘She’s perfect. I love her.’
‘You’ve been supporting that child one way or another since she could walk. You’ve virtually brought her up.’
‘I wanted to be there for Tilly and Katrina.’
‘Katrina’s marriage to Rob, getting pregnant with two more children, moving to South Australia. Matilda has been dumped on your doorstep.’
I take the phone from my ear and stare at it before holding it to my ear again. ‘I make excuses for you, but that doesn’t mean you can say things like that.’
‘What excuses?’
‘Your parents disowned you when you left home to be with Dad. Dad didn’t support you and then you lost Matt.’
‘I only have you, Flick. Can’t you see how hard that is?’
Light floods out of the mess. Angelina walks determinedly down the path, stops at my side and puts Nate’s jacket across my shoulders.
‘Tell her to fuck off,’ she hisses.